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200 Years As The Sun Got Bright

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I took a few liberty caps when I was younger & simply felt that I was sinking into the sofa a little for about an hour. Last night I ate a big handful of fresh PES Hawaiian's & downed some scotch, smoked some pot with hash. I felt fuck all. Was pretty disappointed. 200 grams, half a litre of scotch, & 15 hours later I felt like a changed man & still do. It was by far one of the most powerful experiences I've ever had & I look forward to experimenting a lot more in the future. Here's what happened... Or did it?

As they began to kick in about a couple of hours later I took my handkerchief out of my pocket & tried to open it to blow my nose. No matter how many times I turned or unfolded it it stayed exactly the same & I perceived that I was skipping between dimensional realities going backwards & forwards in time but it was all happening at the same time. Time was no longer linear it was multidimensional & all at once.

I laughed quite a bit in amazement & eventually shifted to the dimension where I could blow my nose! I moved straight there in time. Suddenly I started to feel that every time I thought of doing anything or going anywhere in the room I was already there having done it trying to recollect my memories which started to freak me out. It went on for quite some time & eventually I was lying in bed almost completely oblivious of my body & surroundings while my thoughts went haywire for quite some time. 

I was really afraid that something bad was going to happen & I wouldn't know until it had! I've been suicidally depressed for a very long time & once I began thinking about suicide & prison I was afraid I was going to suddenly be bleeding out or wake up in jail. Eventually I felt as if time just stopped. I came back to my senses got back up & started walking around the room. I had an overwhelming feeling that time was standing still, I felt like I was a ghost as I moved around the room & was not aware of my body besides a thirst that I could never seem to quench. 

I felt as though I faced all of my biggest fears as time was standing still & completely came to terms with all of the worst case scenarios of what might have happened to me & how it would affect my family. I actually thought I was dead but was deeply at peace with everything. I became fully aware of my eternal self & feelings that had evolved throughout my existence to make me who I am & I understood clearly that no matter what happens to me in this lifetime or might have happened already I'll feel no different when I leave here then I do right now... Right now, right now, & the same now when I die. I came to understand through experience that I'm a vast eternal emotional being that's constantly learning to understand itself. I felt so clear & started to see clearly how I wanted to change myself.

I viewed myself as completely separate from the world & my body as if these things were entirely irrelevant to who I am & where I'm going. I heard all sorts of things I don't think were real & I looked out of the window once in the early hours of light & saw two people coming around the corner who I don't think were actually there as when I turned away there was no sound of them walking, talking, or entering the building. I was no longer able to distinguish what was real at all & felt as if I spent 200 years waiting for the sun to get bright. I felt like I was trapped in that universe in "Inception" Where it was just those 2 people alone on the planet for all eternity. Then eventually things started to normalise around noon the next day & I slept till 18:30.

I can't wait to get reading some other's experiences!

Love & hugs ya'll!

Zamnesia.com
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