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Still trying to integrate this to norm

5 grams is alot!

During this last weekend i got a hotel room and i ground up a "heroic" 5 grams of psilocybe cubensis, and gulped it down in a glass of orange juice. now i have had a smalll history with psychedelic substances but had never used them as an introspective tool like this before. The result of this field test of mine was very interesting to say the least. At the beginning of the trip, aided by smoking one of three joints i had rolled, i rode the high up and everything became hyper detailed, colors became hyper vivid, then everything became fuzzy with glowing light around all edge. soon after the onset of this i became increasingly uncomfortable in my cloths and boots. this surprises me now because i feel much more comfortable clothed then not, and id much rather have my boots on then not. Although at the time it only felt natural not to have anything between my feet and the floor. this was the onset of the death of my ego. i was then only in the basketball shorts i had been planning on sleeping in. i spent a short time observing my glowing surroundings and the kaleidoscope lights behind my eyes. 

After awhile i became sure that i was in the presence of a wolf, closing my eyes i was seeing the silhouette of a wolf stalking and snarling at me and alternating Kaleidoscope view of a wolf swirling in black space. I snarled back  at the wolf ready to fight it tooth and nail without a moments thought, i think i passed the wolfs test. I had experiences with seven more animals that night, and i think i passed most of the tests. 

The next  was an owl, mostly what i saw was a kaleidoscope of a light brown howl head with huge yellow eyes, i spent some time watching before i finally understood the owl for what it was, this was the common theme of the animal tests but i find it nearly impossible to articulate exactly what that means now, and i said to the empty room "i see you" over and over for who knows how long. and that passed me to the next animal.

I think that the next one was a deer, though it was an unusual one. it was spotted and its horns swooped downward, all i saw was a silhouette of this deer. I dont recall exactly what i did to pass the dear, all i do remember was that it was much harder then the wolf or owl. 

Next was a horse and again it was a silhouette of a horses head, and it was the shortest of the animal experiences i considered "tests" i have a history with horses so i instantly reached out and felt the horses nose and said "i know you" and was passed forward. 

There was an instant of fear like instinct as i recognized the next animal, the bear, i thought id have to fight it off like the wolf. Almost immediately i realized that i was very wrong and that the bear was  a completely noble creature and after some time of watching the alternating silhouette and kaleidoscopic bear i bowed to it. then the animals stopped for a time.

I started Alternating speaking in gibberish, a phrase i can only spell as UM Nom Shemil/Chimil, and growling english at the mushroom, things like "Show me what you got" and "i can take it" im lucky i wasn't screaming these things and didnt have the cops called on me. at this point i had no idea who i was, my linear consciousness had never ended, but i didn't think of myself as me, but as This Being Having This Experience.  after some time i finally saw the 5th animal. 

I assume that the Fox had been in my field of view the entire time but the test was becoming aware of him (it felt like i him i remember) i remember feeling ashamed that it had taken me so long as the fox faded out and the hardest and last test of the night started

Bunny, i was not expecting bunny and it threw me off guard. i struggled to understand her (it felt like a her i remember) for some time, i saw this white bunny in the landscape of every direction i looked. i dont think i ever passed the bunnys test, all i know is that after some time it ended.

Ok. this is where shit gets really weird. 

So after the bunny test ended i had a realization, one that felt distinctly external to me. that realization was FIRE IS IMPORTANT i starting walking the room, saying fire, fire, fire, fire over and over. i wrote FIRE    IS IMPORTANT in my trip journal a bunch of times. i thought that either I or the mushroom meant that fire was important in the connection to early man and shamanism. maybe i was wrong, this is really my biggest question from this experience.

Because about an hour later i noticed flashing red lights coming in from the hotel window "COPS" was my immediate reaction and it instantly sobered me up by 50% i spent the next twenty minutes fumbling to dress as i was becoming sure that imprisonment was my future. i looked out and two FIRE TRUCKS were pulled into the parking lot. the FIRE MEN opened up the door below and two or three to the right of me and smoke started pouring out. Did i get external info or was it just coincidence.

i smoke the other two joints and ride the high down till i go to bed.

i had one more animal experience as i was falling asleep, i did not add it as a test because it felt much more thretaning and it only lasted a second. as i was falling asleep i became sure that  a large snake was moving across my neck and wrist. i jerked awake and that was the last of it.   


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