My husband and I took our shrooms around 6 pm last night. I don't know how many we took anymore that part of my memory evaporated. I do know they were B + cubes and it was around triple the amount we usually take. I have read the forums, the trip reports and never quite understood the enlightenment of mushrooms until last night. I had no concept of time, there is a piece of paper sitting on my table with the times I looked at the clock from 8-9:40. I remember trying to grasp what it is, and why it should be important to me. I was in another world, a few out of body experiences, and lots and lots of hallucinations. Oh and our apartment was drenched with water at the end of the night. Now to try and explain my trip.
My husband and I started on the couch watching the seventh harry potter, slowly we lost interest and started feeling claustrophobic. Anyone reading this DO NOT TRIP IN A MESSY APARTMENT, or do if you like cleaning :). I decided to take a bath. My visuals were amazing the colors vibrating around the bathroom, the feeling of the warm water against my skin. I would lay as still as possible until i could see the reflection of the walls in the water. My husband came in a half hour after I started and made me get out of the tub since he was planning on leaving. (really doubt I would have drowned in the bathtub but whatever)
My husband is one of those people who likes trying to hide he's fucked up in public, so he had a couple of his friends pick him up around 7. I had originally planned on going with him, but as soon as our friend showed up in the apartment I knew I couldn't go. She creeped me out with all her logic, at this point I was past logic and going on feeling alone. "What feels like the right thing to do". So, I stayed in the messy apartment and started doing the dishes. My favorite part was stacking the cups after they were all dry. I would grab a cup from the strainer and stack it all the way across the kitchen. The weird thing was when I looked at the cup in my hand it was tiny and the cup on the counter was ginormous, but I knew they were meant to go together. The cup would grow right before my eyes and fit onto the other cup as I placed them together.
After stacking the cups I drew a picture of a smiling mushroom man, and he became my friend for the rest of the trip. This morning I hung him on the fridge, I like him. Its hard to believe that I was talking to my drawing, and I think back to how he was a very funny sounding man.
To get back on track at this point I was tripping harder then I ever had before, I have music playing, bubbles in the sink (oh they were amazing to me) and at this point still soaking wet from the bathtub. I never managed to dry off. I was jumping around experiencing the legs that were not mine, waving stranger arms in front of me, and trying to get out of the mess. Every room of the apartment put me into a different mood. The bathroom caused me to stare into the toilet nauseated (I never puked), the bedroom has huge mirrors on the closet doors. I would go in there stare at myself in disgust, and crawl into Narnia through a tunnel of clothes. It felt like a different dimension. the living room has fish. I liked the fish. The couch was off limits. the vibrations and colors made the couch look alive to me. The computer playing the music was to difficult to understand. I would put my fingers on the keys and tell myself, "You control the music". Which partly was true but at the same time as soon as i could focus on the words and not on my morphing hands or the giant to small computer i would click on the word playlist every time. No clue to what I listened to after the led zeppelin I chose because it was on the t-shirt I was wearing. All of this felt like hours but it was all between 8:14-8:21. I wrote down times and one word things on what I was doing on a piece of paper throughout the night. At the time it was so I could remind myself what I was looking for or doing because I was lost in my own apartment. 8:19 -looking for chapstick. I wrote down a few more things but that was as I came down.
I started peaking when I was laying on the floor with my favorite pen and some paper. I turned myself over on the carpet and stared at the walls, ceiling, myself. It was insane the walls were moving in on me, the ceiling was getting smaller, and I was getting bigger. I was laying there, thinking about how hard its been moving 3,100 miles away from my family, not having a job yet, husband is pulling all the weight. I opened my eyes to the room. To me it was "normal" (looking back it was morphed and twisted) ha the kitchen didnt exist and I was halfway in it. I looked at my hands and realized I have been chasing something for the last couple years, missing something that I have never lost. It was strange to realize that I have been chasing something for myself that I have already. If that makes any sense to anyone. To me its comforting, I love me now. I haven't been trying hard enough and I want to try. That moment for me must have been less then a second. It was so fast and instantly I lost focus on that subject and started to draw.
I drew a very realistic picture of my grandpa. Some how I found him on youtube. He's and artist, and I felt some kind of connection to him. All of my family never really understood me, he never said anything but last night all those secret knowing smiles when I was high, or the how every time I showed up to thanksgiving after smoking a bowl of weed everyone else wouldn't notice but he smile at me, and give me colored pencils and paper. I started wondering who he really was. I know he grew up in Cali drove a motorcycle, sold art work why have I never put two and two together. I have no clue.
For the remaining of my trip I played techno music danced and cleaned and loved my life. 10:10 I was completely sober, called my husband to go pick him up. I can not wait to try this again someday. Maybe next time I will take a little less. It was enlightening and a world of color, and emotions/feelings that I will never forget.