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Lost to be Found: The Most Powerful Trip I've Ever Had

Breaking through and re-learining who I was



Yesterday, me and my friend decided that we wanted to do some shrooms (Cubensis) and go out into the wilderness to connect with nature. We left our wallets and cell phones in the car before we left off to make sure we would not be worried about our material possessions. The shrooms we had were specially grown to maximize the amount of psilocybin in them, not to mention that they were also closed caps. My friend did half an eighth of them, which was equivalent to about 4 grams of normal shrooms. I did 3 grams, which was equivalent to almost a quarter of normal shrooms (I think they estimated it to 6.5 grams) We also had a trip sitter with us, who had done much more hallucinogenics than ourselves. My friend who did the shrooms was doing it for his second time while I was doing them for my fifth time.

We ate them in the car while we were driving up to the place we were going to relax at. It was a set of hot springs up in the mountains that were an hour away from where I lived, so we felt it was pretty isolated. We did them at around one in the afternoon.

Within forty minutes, I was already feeling minor effects, like seeing the mountains move as a ocean wave and seeing faces in the rocks. They weren't significantly distinct though, rather just like I was picking out eyes, noses, and ears out of rock formations.

By the time we reached the hot springs, my friend was beginning to trip, but my visuals were becoming more powerful. All the colors around me were becoming extremely vivid, as well as the shapes of the trees began to change. Pine trees began resembling the waving trees in the Lorax, and the lichen on the rocks began looking like sea urchins moving along the rock. We found a small river flowing near the hot springs, and decided to go lay near what seemed to be a perfectly eroded rock. The water appeared to be a solid turquoise while the pine trees began looking lime green colored instead of a dark green. It was getting hot outside, so I decided to lay in the water for a quick while, feeling as if I was baptizing myself.

After another hour, shit began to hit the fan. Spiral clusters started forming out of the rocks, my thoughts began running wild, and I felt trapped on this small rock peninsula, even though there was an easy way off of it. After thirty minutes of sitting on the rock, I broke through for the first time as I laid out on it. I saw a flurry of flowers in background of my mind as a (what I can only describe it as) quetzalcoatl arose from the flowers. Its tail formed a massive frill that began opening and expanding outwards towards the edges of my vision. The frill was colored much like the maize that is grown in Central America: a collection of crimson red, black, yellow, and white. However, once it's frill opened the full way, the quetzalcoatl flew off, and I began falling into nothingness. When I had came back from my breakthrough, I had forgotten everything about myself; a complete ego death.

My trip sitter began talking me through everything that had happened, and helped me try to remember things, like my name, where I was, and what the date was. However, once the ego death had begun, everything began spiraling out of control. I had lost concept of reality, and began thinking that I had broken the scale of time. I tried recollecting the basic concepts of reality (Earth revolving around the Sun, time moves in a continuous motion) but still felt confused about them. It had seemed as if everything I had been told was a lie, and that I was being observed by some sort of higher entity; whether it was aliens or a deity I wasn't sure of. Everywhere I looked, I saw some sort of figure in my line of sight. Of any person I know of, I would say he closely resembled "The Most Interesting Man in the World", but had a longer beard, smaller ears, and larger eyes. Everything looked as if there was a warp in the fabric of space and time, and everything moved around it as if you drew lines on an egg.

However, by the time the four hour mark had kicked in, I began coming down, feeling as if I had been reborn. I began re-imagining the most basic principles of life and existence, particularly humans. During this entire time though while my friends listened, I still felt as if I was being watched by the higher entity that was watching me earlier. I began remembering my old life, but felt as if I had done something worthy to have the police chasing after us, so I still felt slightly panicked. The confusing figure vanished from my vision, but was replaced by a combination of George Washington and Barrack Obama. Slowly but surely, I began coming up, feeling better than I have as long as I can remember.

The small visuals of Washington and Obama stayed with me for more than another four hours, but wasn't close to as dominant as it was before.

This trip completely changed my entire life, and helped me realize what I had, and what I could do to stay myself, especially now as I enter my second year of college.

Moral of the story: If you do a lot of shrooms, be ready for it.
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