So, I am going to die........ Sort of........(medical tests of doom)

Well we all will die someday.
But do you appreciate your life, and enjoy it minute by minute????

really not trying to be dramatic, but I've had a fucked up week........

I went to the doctor to make see if he could make me an appointment with a cardiologist, to see how my heart murmur is doing. And to ask him about when I almost passed out, and had a horrible pain in my chest and ended up cold and shaking.

While doing a ECG to check the electrical flow of my blood steam and such, which was admittedly pretty neat, he said, "I had you pegged as maybe being a slight hypochondriac about this latest thing, but somethings is defiantly wrong. Now relax for the rest of the test" :P

I told him he should have said that somethings wrong at the end if he wants me to relax.

So I have to go for 4 test now :frown:

2 tomorrow. And 2 other ones(seeing specialists, in 2 months)

One of the things wrong with my heart is that the "wiring isn't working in on the right side" I have an "Incomplete Right Bundle Branch Block"
I hope that doesn't have something to do with a large build up of calcium. :frown:

But I'm not sure.

My doctor also has a hearty murmur, and when I questioned him on the subject of life span the answer were not really encouraging.

I wont be dead any day soon, or at least chances are I shouldn't be..... but my doctor agrees that my heart problems have gotten worse.

I wish I would have gone in sooner, waiting for these specialist will take months.
But at least I get to take 2 test tomorrow. ....yay.

I suppose we should cherish every moment, I think I have since drowning, now, I have yet another reminder.

Doc also made fun of my lung capacity. :P I've been going to him since I was a teen, and he's a nice guy. We joke around allot , and I'm 100% honest about ALL my drug usage.

Well he made me blow through a machine today and then made fun of me :blush:

and told me he wants me to only use my vaporizer for the next week or so and then come back and try again, and so on.

I don't smoke tons of pot. But I do smoke everyday. Still I was at a friends house the night before todays test.
His tobacco smoking is what through my score off. Fuck him, it's his fault :noway:

That fucking Pepsi sucking fattie cakes mother fucker.

Anyway, I'm pretty fucking nervous, really nervous actually sometimes, with moving and all.

But now that I've been reminded of my health problems again, and now I know at little more about where I'm at........

There is an errrie sense of calm that I have. And attitude that says I really don't know how much time I have, or when I will need surgery, or anything else.......

So anyone that want to bring needless drama, problems, or stress into my life, or even in my direction can fuck right off.
I owe it to my heart, which is just one of the many parts that make up what is me.
I'm going to enjoy the time I have left. I'm going to live for the moment, and my own goals and dreams, not the ideals of some in my family , nor society's mass herd psychosis.

I'm going to leave things the right way.
And I'm going to write allot down, and leave allot behind. :smile:

Similar Threads	Poster	Views	Replies	Last post
I have to pass a drug test. Niacin or B6?? ( 1 2 all )	SJR	14,493	31	10/02/03 12:36 PM by tripndicular
In 60 years, we are all doomed... ( 1 2 all )	Purple Haze	3,908	29	08/29/03 03:26 AM by PDU
Failed my drug test!!!!!!	djd586	4,573	9	05/16/04 11:47 AM by ToTheSummit
Drug Test Your Teen Dot Com	carbonhoots	5,699	12	01/02/04 04:16 AM by Anno
Police: Man dies after trying to swallow bag of pot ( 1 2 3 all )	Stein	6,895	49	11/21/03 01:02 AM by OldSpice
Who wants to participate in our Ouija board test? ( 1 2 all )	cybrbeast	5,253	37	12/04/03 10:26 AM by stefan
Stuck in a rut with drug testing :\ please help	andySENSE311	2,591	13	06/05/04 11:59 PM by ink
Drug Testing....	DxShroomFactor	3,130	11	11/01/03 05:55 PM by synthesis