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Anonymous #1

depression
    #27282666 - 04/26/21 12:44 PM (2 years, 8 months ago)

I am a edited suffering with depression. The pressure of constantly meeting arbitrary deadlines.... the pointless meeting.... the hours of preparation

I can't do it anymore. I'm so tired. I want to quit. Joining edited was a huge mistake...

I don't have any time to schedule fun stuff.
I have problems with my edited, so my usual de-stressors (playing instruments, drawing, etc) are off limits. Which is exacerbating my depression

Idk what to do.


Edited by Anonymous (07/01/21 10:06 PM)


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Anonymous #2

Re: depression [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #27282674 - 04/26/21 12:57 PM (2 years, 8 months ago)

Try and do one small thing better than the day before each day. Keep building on that.

Lord knows I've had my struggles with depression, and that's all I've found to be reliable at pulling me out of the hole when I'm at or nearing rock bottom.


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Anonymous #3

Re: depression [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #27282681 - 04/26/21 01:00 PM (2 years, 8 months ago)

Sorry to hear about your struggles. Maybe try to negotiate with your program director a leave of absence for health reasons, so that you can take a break and possibly return later on after focusing on your mental health? After induction, you'll probably have even less time to focus on yourself, so now is the time to prioritize your own needs. Even if you feel like you've devoted too much time towards this profession to quit, know that you can ALWAYS pivot and find something else that serves you better. Rooting for you:)


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Anonymous #4

Re: depression [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #27282690 - 04/26/21 01:05 PM (2 years, 8 months ago)

Would you be happier at some shit-job 9-5? IE is this really about the job or is it something internally you have to figure out? Being depressed can make what would normally be easy for us seem extra hard.

Does the school district offer any support structures? Someone you could talk to? You seeing a doctor about those wrists?
Is your work-load set to decrease eventually? IE is this just a period you have to push through then you'll get a break?

You gotta make some time for yourself. Even a quick walk around the block will help.


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Anonymous #5

Re: depression [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #27282749 - 04/26/21 01:58 PM (2 years, 8 months ago)

What brought you to the shroomery? Are you hoping that mushrooms can help you? I was dealing with depression to the point I could barely do my job. Even then it was a major struggle to do the minimum work expected from me. I knew it was not the nature of the job but my depression. And the mushrooms have really helped. I can only talk about my own experience here. If you have not tried the mushrooms you may want to do some research about how they have helped some people. From your post we cannot determine what have you tried in terms of dealing with your depression.


Edited by Anonymous (04/26/21 02:15 PM)


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Anonymous #1

Re: depression [Re: Anonymous #5]
    #27282942 - 04/26/21 04:46 PM (2 years, 8 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous #2 said:
Try and do one small thing better than the day before each day.




Thanks :smile:

Quote:

Anonymous #4 said:
is this really about the job or is it something internally you have to figure out? Being depressed can make what would normally be easy for us seem extra hard.

Does the school district offer any support structures? Someone you could talk to? You seeing a doctor about those wrists?
Is your work-load set to decrease eventually? IE is this just a period you have to push through then you'll get a break?

You gotta make some time for yourself. Even a quick walk around the block will help.




its exacerbated by the job, but the cause is deeper.

Ive seen a doctor, i have edited so its not the worst thing ever, but it DOES really prevent me from working to my full capacity. I do just have to push through till june, but this is the time where I have a ridiculous amount of work to do.

I try to go on walks daily, but i wish i had a friend to go with me.

Quote:

Anonymous #5 said:
What brought you to the shroomery? Are you hoping that mushrooms can help you? I was dealing with depression to the point I could barely do my job. Even then it was a major struggle to do the minimum work expected from me. I knew it was not the nature of the job but my depression. And the mushrooms have really helped. I can only talk about my own experience here. If you have not tried the mushrooms you may want to do some research about how they have helped some people. From your post we cannot determine what have you tried in terms of dealing with your depression.




Ive been on the shroomery for over 10 years (i lurked for a few years before making an account). Mushies and psyches in general HAVE helped me with my depression, but TBH the past few times I tripped, i couldnt enjoy it, bc i couldnt stop thinking about all of my work. Rather than having less than ideal psychedelic experiences, i have chosen to wait till summer to trip.


Thank you everybody! I know that there are bigger problems in the world, and that many others also suffer from depression, but it is difficult.
There are many times where i dont feel welcomed- i feel like i have no friends anymore. As sad as it sounds, its a huge reason why i hang out here on the shroomery so much. TBH i dont even participate in that many forums, but just being able to read about ppl and have mild interactions is amazing.

I just want to wake up one day and not have this overwhelming cloud of sorrow.


Edited by Anonymous (07/01/21 10:07 PM)


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Anonymous #6

Re: depression [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #27284700 - 04/28/21 05:53 AM (2 years, 8 months ago)

It sounds like the life you're leading is not resonating with your core values or needs.

I know in this capitalist society we need to work to live, but if we shrug off the allure of consumerism, it's possible to live on less.

Have you ever delved into your core values, your passions, and used them as a basis to project what kind of future you might want to live?

We are here for such a short space of time, and all our actions will ultimately amount to nothing. The only path there is, is living in tune with our self and finding value in life that resonates with us.

Start considering where you would want to be.


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Anonymous #7

Re: depression [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #27320203 - 05/23/21 04:16 PM (2 years, 8 months ago)

It could be way worse.  Pull it together and do something about it.


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Anonymous #1

Re: depression [Re: Anonymous #7]
    #27321686 - 05/24/21 07:37 PM (2 years, 8 months ago)

you know, i do agree with this for the most part. And at the end of the day it's really the only thing that works.

But when you are feeling depressed you are not thinking rationally. You don't care about the consequences. You have no motivation. nothing matters


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Anonymous #8

Re: depression [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #27323277 - 05/26/21 12:01 AM (2 years, 7 months ago)

What do you mean that you don't  have time to schedule fun stuff?

I work 70-80 a week and still make time to ride my mountain bike and keep a needy girlfriend satisfied. I understand deadlines, I have a demanding job that depends on it. I am under constant pressure to be on time.

You have the time, just make it. You just need to learn how to manage your time, it's not easy and sometimes won't always work out for you but it can be done

Life throws you a curveball once in awhile,  don't get down on yourself


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Anonymous #9

Re: depression [Re: Anonymous #6]
    #27323402 - 05/26/21 03:16 AM (2 years, 7 months ago)

Our actions do not amount to nothing.  I see people say this all the time.  From personal relationships on up to decisions we’ve made about fucking up this earth and burdens that people not even born yet are going to inherit

Mainstream outlooks are lies.  There’s a reason they pump that shit in your brain.  This is life, it matters.


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