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OfflineCosmic_Monkey
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I'm better than you!
    #979387 - 10/21/02 10:38 AM (14 years, 1 month ago)

I've come to understand that an important part of freeing my mind is to stop judging people. But, this is easier said than accomplished. I find myself constantly judging everyone and can't seem to break free from it.
Anyone have some helpful tips?


Edited by Cosmic_Monkey (10/21/02 10:38 AM)


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Invisibledee_N_ae
\/\/¡†¢h |-|øµ§³ ¢å†
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Registered: 08/16/02
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Re: I'm better than you! [Re: Cosmic_Monkey]
    #979421 - 10/21/02 11:12 AM (14 years, 1 month ago)

I've had this trouble....
It seems as though it's fine to judge someone as long as you recognise you are highlighting the same thing (a negative aspect) in your own character by doing so.

I hardly do it as much as I used to...but when around others who do it all time it becomes like second nature almost.


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InvisibleSclorch
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Re: I'm better than you! [Re: Cosmic_Monkey]
    #979456 - 10/21/02 11:25 AM (14 years, 1 month ago)

I find myself constantly judging everyone and can't seem to break free from it.
Anyone have some helpful tips?


Yeah, fuck up on purpose.
Allow yourself to get drunk and do something stupid. Then, later (the next day?), don't be upset with yourself... then take that mentality of "sometimes people fuck up... some more than others" and apply it to your everyday life.

Now, this worked for me... but it might not work for you.

And NO, I'm not being sarcastic.


--------------------
Note: In desperate need of a cure...


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Invisiblebuttonion
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Registered: 04/04/02
Posts: 303
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Re: I'm better than you! [Re: dee_N_ae]
    #979507 - 10/21/02 11:51 AM (14 years, 1 month ago)

It seems as though it's fine to judge someone as long as you recognise you are highlighting the same thing (a negative aspect) in your own character by doing so.

Good point. Karen Horney and other psychodynamic theorists say we often "externalize."

It's kind of complicated, but she says that, to a variety of degrees, people are generally always trying to resolve the discrepancy between the perceived self (how you see yourself) and an ideal self (how you would ideally see yourself). A big enough discrepancy is often associated with psychological discomfort (anxiety, depression). One way to resolve the discrepancy would be to acknowledge your shortcomings and adjust your ideal more realistically. Another is externalization, which often takes the form of seeing that which you don't like about your perceived self in others- it allows you to mount some sort of campaign against these shortcomings, because to acknowledge them in yourself may be too much to bear. As you might have guessed, however, this is not the healthiest way to resolve this issue- But I'm definitely not exempt!


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Concepts which have been proved to be useful in ordering things easily acquire such an authority over us that we forget their human origins and accept them as invariable.- Albert Einstein


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Invisibledee_N_ae
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Re: I'm better than you! [Re: buttonion]
    #979520 - 10/21/02 11:58 AM (14 years, 1 month ago)

Damn, I know what you mean about it not being the healthiest way!
However, I'm eternally grateful for the path I have chosen.  :smile: :smile: 


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OfflineLittleBen
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Registered: 08/31/02
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Re: I'm better than you! [Re: dee_N_ae]
    #979726 - 10/21/02 01:56 PM (14 years, 1 month ago)

You may be better than me, but this guy is better than your kids.


--------------------
Gaia, as you awaken, I heal myself. As I awaken, you are healed.


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Invisiblebuttonion
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Registered: 04/04/02
Posts: 303
Loc: Kansas
Re: I'm better than you! [Re: LittleBen]
    #979768 - 10/21/02 02:12 PM (14 years, 1 month ago)

funny


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Concepts which have been proved to be useful in ordering things easily acquire such an authority over us that we forget their human origins and accept them as invariable.- Albert Einstein


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OfflineMAIA
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Re: I'm better than you! [Re: Cosmic_Monkey]
    #980301 - 10/21/02 06:12 PM (14 years, 1 month ago)

All that matters is the outcome of your judgment.
What you might feel is that you're over analizing someone, not strictlly judging that person.
You might find your self looking at someone and thinking "look at this guy, he's an ass" but,
-Why are you judging him ?
A social issue. You don't you like his shirt or he smokes cigars and you don't like the smell.
A Racist issue. The guy is black or red or yellow.
A Sexual issue. The guy is gay.
I put the "why" related to a certain tolerance level. It is sometimes difficult to lose some bad habits in the knowlodge process (education&parents), this is often called as "thinking trash" and seen as one more fallacie.
-What action does this judgement start on you ?
If you're bounded to this "thinking trash" wich is the amount of preconceived ideas, this can lead you to take precipitate decisions shown in your actions and attitude, due to it's nature, this ideas will unfocus your thinking process.
If you're not bounded, then you can focus in important aspects, this way your actions and attitudes are taken after a learning period of others personality. People that analize in detail but do it without preconceived ideas normally adapt and interact better with other people, because they know how to act acording others attitude.

MAIA


--------------------
Spiritual being, living a human experience ... The Shroomery Mandala



Use, do not abuse; neither abstinence nor excess ever renders man happy.
Voltaire


Edited by MAIA (10/21/02 06:13 PM)


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Anonymous

Re: I'm better than you! [Re: LittleBen]
    #980695 - 10/21/02 09:18 PM (14 years, 1 month ago)

HAAHAHAH, that is the most ridiculous site I have ever seen.

That guy is a total son of a bitch but I still couldn't stop laughing at his site.


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