Home | Community | Message Board

HighDesertSpores.com
Please support our sponsors.


Welcome to the Shroomery Message Board! You are experiencing a small sample of what the site has to offer. Please login or register to post messages and view our exclusive members-only content. You'll gain access to additional forums, file attachments, board customizations, encrypted private messages, and much more!

Kraken Kratom Shop: Red Vein Kratom

Jump to first unread post Pages: 1
OfflinePookztA
Medical Student


Registered: 09/09/05
Posts: 1,225
Loc: Illinois
Last seen: 10 years, 20 days
Intelligent Design in Kansas Schools & The Flying Spaghetti Monster! MUST READ!
    #9440725 - 12/16/08 01:05 AM (12 years, 10 months ago)

(this post is extremely relevant to Religion and Evolution, in Education)

Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you the Flying Spaghetti Monster:



Bobby Henderson's (concerned citizen) Open Letter To Kansas School Board concerning the recent approval of teaching Intelligent Design (Also known as: disguised creationism) alongside Evolution in the school's curriculum:


I am writing you with much concern after having read of your hearing to decide whether the alternative theory of Intelligent Design should be taught along with the theory of Evolution. I think we can all agree that it is important for students to hear multiple viewpoints so they can choose for themselves the theory that makes the most sense to them. I am concerned, however, that students will only hear one theory of Intelligent Design.

Let us remember that there are multiple theories of Intelligent Design. I and many others around the world are of the strong belief that the universe was created by a Flying Spaghetti Monster. It was He who created all that we see and all that we feel. We feel strongly that the overwhelming scientific evidence pointing towards evolutionary processes is nothing but a coincidence, put in place by Him.

It is for this reason that I’m writing you today, to formally request that this alternative theory be taught in your schools, along with the other two theories. In fact, I will go so far as to say, if you do not agree to do this, we will be forced to proceed with legal action. I’m sure you see where we are coming from. If the Intelligent Design theory is not based on faith, but instead another scientific theory, as is claimed, then you must also allow our theory to be taught, as it is also based on science, not on faith.

Some find that hard to believe, so it may be helpful to tell you a little more about our beliefs. We have evidence that a Flying Spaghetti Monster created the universe. None of us, of course, were around to see it, but we have written accounts of it. We have several lengthy volumes explaining all details of His power. Also, you may be surprised to hear that there are over 10 million of us, and growing. We tend to be very secretive, as many people claim our beliefs are not substantiated by observable evidence. What these people don’t understand is that He built the world to make us think the earth is older than it really is. For example, a scientist may perform a carbon-dating process on an artifact. He finds that approximately 75% of the Carbon-14 has decayed by electron emission to Nitrogen-14, and infers that this artifact is approximately 10,000 years old, as the half-life of Carbon-14 appears to be 5,730 years. But what our scientist does not realize is that every time he makes a measurement, the Flying Spaghetti Monster is there changing the results with His Noodly Appendage. We have numerous texts that describe in detail how this can be possible and the reasons why He does this. He is of course invisible and can pass through normal matter with ease.

I’m sure you now realize how important it is that your students are taught this alternate theory. It is absolutely imperative that they realize that observable evidence is at the discretion of a Flying Spaghetti Monster. Furthermore, it is disrespectful to teach our beliefs without wearing His chosen outfit, which of course is full pirate regalia. I cannot stress the importance of this enough, and unfortunately cannot describe in detail why this must be done as I fear this letter is already becoming too long. The concise explanation is that He becomes angry if we don’t.

You may be interested to know that global warming, earthquakes, hurricanes, and other natural disasters are a direct effect of the shrinking numbers of Pirates since the 1800s. For your interest, I have included a graph of the approximate number of pirates versus the average global temperature over the last 200 years. As you can see, there is a statistically significant inverse relationship between pirates and global temperature.



In conclusion, thank you for taking the time to hear our views and beliefs. I hope I was able to convey the importance of teaching this theory to your students. We will of course be able to train the teachers in this alternate theory. I am eagerly awaiting your response, and hope dearly that no legal action will need to be taken. I think we can all look forward to the time when these three theories are given equal time in our science classrooms across the country, and eventually the world; One third time for Intelligent Design, one third time for Flying Spaghetti Monsterism, and one third time for logical conjecture based on overwhelming observable evidence.

Sincerely Yours,

Bobby Henderson, concerned citizen.

P.S. I have included an artistic drawing of Him creating a mountain, trees, and a midget. Remember, we are all His creatures.



THE OFFICIAL WEBSITE OF THE FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER RELIGION IS: http://www.venganza.org/


------------


Hope everyone enjoyed this post, I found it very humorous how the theory of the Flying Spaghetti Monster as the condemner of humans to heaven or hell is just as logical as a white, bearded man in the clouds doing the condemning.

I choose to simply be spiritual, being thankful towards this Universe which has provided me with my physical body and surroundings, and for the spirit which interconnects us all and simultaneously powers all the magic that is present in this playground of infinite possibilities.

(apparently the flying spaghetti monster is several years old, but since a good friend just brought it to my attention, my fascination is just beginning!)


--------------------
Abrahm
Spreading Psytrance & Love in the Midwest USA

Expand Your Consciousness. :mushroomgrow:

:peace: 9/11 Challenge: Explain the Evidence http://pookzta.blogspot.com


Edited by PookztA (12/16/08 03:20 AM)


Extras: Filter Print Post Remind Me! Notify Moderator Top
InvisibleDieCommie

Registered: 12/11/03
Posts: 29,258
Re: Intelligent Design in Kansas Schools & The Flying Spaghetti Monster! MUST READ! [Re: PookztA]
    #9440740 - 12/16/08 01:08 AM (12 years, 10 months ago)

People have been following that religion for years, I am yet to be convinced.  :snub:


Extras: Filter Print Post Remind Me! Notify Moderator Top
OfflinePreyToGod
peace.pot.microdot.
Male


Registered: 01/23/08
Posts: 693
Loc: truckin,,,
Last seen: 11 years, 7 months
Re: Intelligent Design in Kansas Schools & The Flying Spaghetti Monster! MUST READ! [Re: DieCommie]
    #9440785 - 12/16/08 01:16 AM (12 years, 10 months ago)

yeah, my boy talks about the spaghetti monster all the time.  i guess its just as real as god.  who knows?


--------------------
"We live together, we act on, and react to, one another but always and in all circumstances we are by ourselves... By its very nature every embodied spirit is doomed to suffer and enjoy in solitude." Huxuly
the man in black fled across the desert and the gunslinger followed

just because we all see the:greenshroom:
doesn't mean we all see the same
:mushroom2:

I pushed my fingers through the earth, returned this flower to the dirt. so it could live, I walked away now. But I know... Not a day goes by when I don't feel this burn. There's a point we pass from which we can't return. I've felt the cold rain of the coming storm
None but ourselves can free our minds.”




Extras: Filter Print Post Remind Me! Notify Moderator Top
OfflineC.M. Mann
subconscious explorer
Male


Registered: 05/01/08
Posts: 899
Loc: Florida
Last seen: 10 years, 6 months
Re: Intelligent Design in Kansas Schools & The Flying Spaghetti Monster! MUST READ! [Re: DieCommie]
    #9440806 - 12/16/08 01:19 AM (12 years, 10 months ago)

And now, something completely different!


Extras: Filter Print Post Remind Me! Notify Moderator Top
Offlinelearningtofly
Ancient Aliens
Male


Registered: 05/21/07
Posts: 15,105
Loc: Out of this world
Last seen: 10 years, 2 months
Re: Intelligent Design in Kansas Schools & The Flying Spaghetti Monster! MUST READ! [Re: C.M. Mann]
    #9440823 - 12/16/08 01:22 AM (12 years, 10 months ago)

Not to burst your bubble OP but this is also extremely old.


--------------------


Extras: Filter Print Post Remind Me! Notify Moderator Top
OfflinePookztA
Medical Student


Registered: 09/09/05
Posts: 1,225
Loc: Illinois
Last seen: 10 years, 20 days
Re: Intelligent Design in Kansas Schools & The Flying Spaghetti Monster! MUST READ! [Re: learningtofly]
    #9440933 - 12/16/08 01:41 AM (12 years, 10 months ago)

oh damn, how old is it?! for some reason i just found out about this...


--------------------
Abrahm
Spreading Psytrance & Love in the Midwest USA

Expand Your Consciousness. :mushroomgrow:

:peace: 9/11 Challenge: Explain the Evidence http://pookzta.blogspot.com


Extras: Filter Print Post Remind Me! Notify Moderator Top
Offlinethekwazz
Calm.Collected.German
Male User Gallery


Registered: 09/02/08
Posts: 1,158
Loc: City of murder, GA
Last seen: 8 years, 5 months
Re: Intelligent Design in Kansas Schools & The Flying Spaghetti Monster! MUST READ! [Re: PookztA]
    #9440956 - 12/16/08 01:46 AM (12 years, 10 months ago)

It's a few years, at least. No big deal. We loves us some FSM.

Ramen.


--------------------

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go on an overnight drunk, and in 10 days I'm going to set out to find the shark that ate my friend and destroy it. Anyone who wants to tag along is more than welcome.


Extras: Filter Print Post Remind Me! Notify Moderator Top
OfflinePookztA
Medical Student


Registered: 09/09/05
Posts: 1,225
Loc: Illinois
Last seen: 10 years, 20 days
Re: Intelligent Design in Kansas Schools & The Flying Spaghetti Monster! MUST READ! [Re: thekwazz]
    #9440997 - 12/16/08 01:53 AM (12 years, 10 months ago)

damn i feel like a tard... i just found out about this like 3 days ago and thought i was helping spread the news lol! still fun to read though! cool avatar though :laugh:


--------------------
Abrahm
Spreading Psytrance & Love in the Midwest USA

Expand Your Consciousness. :mushroomgrow:

:peace: 9/11 Challenge: Explain the Evidence http://pookzta.blogspot.com


Extras: Filter Print Post Remind Me! Notify Moderator Top
InvisibleOrgoneConclusion
Blue Fish Group
Male


Registered: 04/01/07
Posts: 45,399
Loc: Under the C
Re: Intelligent Design in Kansas Schools & The Flying Spaghetti Monster! MUST READ! [Re: thekwazz]
    #9441013 - 12/16/08 01:55 AM (12 years, 10 months ago)

What wine would you recommend when eating of his holy garlicness?


--------------------


Extras: Filter Print Post Remind Me! Notify Moderator Top
Offlinelearningtofly
Ancient Aliens
Male


Registered: 05/21/07
Posts: 15,105
Loc: Out of this world
Last seen: 10 years, 2 months
Re: Intelligent Design in Kansas Schools & The Flying Spaghetti Monster! MUST READ! [Re: PookztA]
    #9441113 - 12/16/08 02:11 AM (12 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

PookztA said:
oh damn, how old is it?! for some reason i just found out about this...




doesnt mean it still isn't funny. i continue to LOL at it


--------------------


Extras: Filter Print Post Remind Me! Notify Moderator Top
OfflinePookztA
Medical Student


Registered: 09/09/05
Posts: 1,225
Loc: Illinois
Last seen: 10 years, 20 days
Re: Intelligent Design in Kansas Schools & The Flying Spaghetti Monster! MUST READ! [Re: learningtofly]
    #9441430 - 12/16/08 03:11 AM (12 years, 10 months ago)

haha i am LOLing also :smile:


--------------------
Abrahm
Spreading Psytrance & Love in the Midwest USA

Expand Your Consciousness. :mushroomgrow:

:peace: 9/11 Challenge: Explain the Evidence http://pookzta.blogspot.com


Extras: Filter Print Post Remind Me! Notify Moderator Top
InvisibleSophistic Radiance
Free sVs!
Female


Registered: 07/11/06
Posts: 43,135
Loc: Center of the Universe
Re: Intelligent Design in Kansas Schools & The Flying Spaghetti Monster! MUST READ! [Re: PookztA]
    #9441659 - 12/16/08 04:07 AM (12 years, 10 months ago)

Yeah, this is new to me too... seems like common sense though, it's a shame the suggestions have yet to be implemented.


--------------------
Enlil said:
You really are the worst kind of person.



Extras: Filter Print Post Remind Me! Notify Moderator Top
OfflineNoteworthy
Sophyphile
 User Gallery

Registered: 10/05/08
Posts: 5,599
Last seen: 8 years, 9 months
Re: Intelligent Design in Kansas Schools & The Flying Spaghetti Monster! MUST READ! [Re: Sophistic Radiance]
    #9448083 - 12/17/08 03:21 AM (12 years, 10 months ago)

Lol i never saw the 'Ramen' substitution before


--------------------


Extras: Filter Print Post Remind Me! Notify Moderator Top
OfflineSeussA
Error: divide byzero


Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 04/27/01
Posts: 23,480
Loc: Caribbean
Last seen: 4 months, 20 days
Re: Intelligent Design in Kansas Schools & The Flying Spaghetti Monster! MUST READ! [Re: Noteworthy]
    #9448509 - 12/17/08 06:35 AM (12 years, 10 months ago)

> What wine would you recommend when eating of his holy garlicness?

Promessa Rosso Salento 2001 for around $10 a bottle.  If you have money to burn, then Ridge Monte Bello Cabernet Sauvignon 2002 for around $115 a bottle.


--------------------
Just another spore in the wind.


Extras: Filter Print Post Remind Me! Notify Moderator Top
Jump to top Pages: 1

Kraken Kratom Shop: Red Vein Kratom


Similar ThreadsPosterViewsRepliesLast post
* Intelligent Design
( 1 2 all )
djd586 3,031 22 12/18/03 05:32 PM
by fireworks_god
* intelligent design or evolution? tak 2,652 18 08/12/04 02:46 AM
by Strumpling
* I want to debate a "creation scientist".
( 1 2 3 4 ... 11 12 all )
Phluck 15,207 232 12/01/04 06:26 PM
by Diploid
* Argument by Design Bullfrog1 1,522 10 12/09/07 09:38 PM
by Holly
* Intelligent Nature SoulTech 1,813 18 10/20/04 07:50 PM
by deff
* IFOs (Identified Flying Objects) Anonymous 1,402 15 01/18/02 09:49 PM
by gribochek
* There isn't intelligent life out there reason 2
( 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 all )
Dogomush 8,462 141 09/07/09 12:46 PM
by sandman3698
* Flying by the Seat of my Pants Frog 1,276 19 01/17/04 03:22 PM
by Frog

Extra information
You cannot start new topics / You cannot reply to topics
HTML is disabled / BBCode is enabled
Moderator: Middleman, Jokeshopbeard, DividedQuantum
774 topic views. 1 members, 1 guests and 3 web crawlers are browsing this forum.
[ Print Topic | ]
Search this thread:

Copyright 1997-2021 Mind Media. Some rights reserved.

Generated in 0.034 seconds spending 0.008 seconds on 16 queries.