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Walking paradox
Stranger
Registered: 07/04/08
Posts: 54
Last seen: 14 years, 5 months
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so theres this girl
#8683165 - 07/26/08 05:20 AM (15 years, 8 months ago) |
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i met her in college, we got along pretty well. moved back home, she ended up being from the same place as me. ive had feelings for her for a while, but only really made myself known for them once. recently we have been hanging out alot more, going to movies, to get coffee and such and shes definitely been flirting with me a bit. im really terrible at flirting and such and i cant tell if shes actually in to me or just fucking with my head. either way, i dont want to give up an opportunity like this and im probably already pushing my luck on the timing, i'm just uncertain how to go about making a move or whatever, ive never really initiated a relationship in my entire life.
so if anyone has any advice about women that would help in a young lads life, i would really appreciate it.
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JacquesCousteau
Being.
Registered: 06/10/03
Posts: 7,825
Loc: Everywhere, Everytime.
Last seen: 1 year, 10 months
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Fuck it, dude.
Just go for it.
Listen... if she was just fucking with your head, then why would you want to prolong that shit?
It's not logical that she's just fucking with your head if you're hanging with her solo.
More than likely your brain is just trying to give you a good excuse to avoid confrontation... but more than likely she is not messing with you. She's either a) into you, or b) miscommunicating.
And if it's b, well... better to clear the air that you interpret her actions as flirtatious now... or else it will just continue to eat you up inside indefinitely.
Obviously this is a shit or get off the pot scenario. You have nothing to lose. Just tell her how you feel. Maybe write her a mushy letter. Short and sweet, though. Don't make it overwhelming. Just get to the point, and try to find out how she feels about you.
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Walking paradox
Stranger
Registered: 07/04/08
Posts: 54
Last seen: 14 years, 5 months
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shit or get off the pot pretty much summed it up.
you would think i would have grown a pair by now.
i might just write her a song or something.
or would it be cool for me to just tell her how i feel straight up? ive tried that like 2 times with kind of disappointing results, but this feels like a different situation.
Edited by Walking paradox (07/26/08 08:14 AM)
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JacquesCousteau
Being.
Registered: 06/10/03
Posts: 7,825
Loc: Everywhere, Everytime.
Last seen: 1 year, 10 months
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Well if you try again and are still disappointed with the results, it is time to ask her how SHE feels about what you had to say. Play it by ear. Talk to her about it. Work it out, one way or the other.
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Justice_Fish
Fustice_Jish
Registered: 01/06/07
Posts: 2,652
Loc: CebèuQ
Last seen: 7 years, 5 months
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Writing a song, I don't think so
Just go for it show your true feelings
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Walking paradox
Stranger
Registered: 07/04/08
Posts: 54
Last seen: 14 years, 5 months
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yeah a song seemed like a pretty over the top response. anyway, it just sounds like i gotta stop being a bitch about it and stand up for how i feel.
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ChiefGreenLeaf
Registered: 01/11/07
Posts: 1,596
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The next time you catcher her flirting, when your alone, just straight up ask her in a playful way: Why do you hit on me so much, huh?
You have to put her on the spot. Read about women's psychology.
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fazdazzle
Wanderer
Registered: 02/17/05
Posts: 1,796
Last seen: 11 years, 2 months
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I would recommend getting physical.
I don't mean get naked and try and bone her or slap her ass....but playfully punch her, or pinch her or give her a high five...when you see something interesting don't just say "hey! hey! look over there!" lightly touch her and show her. If you're talking intensely or exaggerating grab her shoulders to make a greater effect. She will respond and start touching you back and it will be smooth and silk from there.
Remember, as shitty as this might sound, that almost all girls want guys to be going after them....since that's how nature works. If she is actually putting out vibes and flirting with you she will get upset if you don't put yourself out there too. Yes, upset. Girls have gotten mad at me for not responding to their flirting.
I guess it's understandable - put yourself in her shoes. You're flirting with someone and they're not responding...how would you feel? rejected? Coldly so, yes.
Your mind *will* play tricks on you, as the other poster mentioned. I've seen it with myself but I see it more clearly with my friends. There will be a girl all over someone and he'll deny it practically to the end that she wants him.
Good luck!
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Walking paradox
Stranger
Registered: 07/04/08
Posts: 54
Last seen: 14 years, 5 months
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Re: so theres this girl [Re: fazdazzle]
#8684441 - 07/26/08 02:26 PM (15 years, 8 months ago) |
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wow, you guys have really helped me get out of my headfuck. thanks a ton.
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WhiskeyClone
Not here
Registered: 06/25/01
Posts: 16,509
Loc: Longitudinal Center of Canada ...
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I wouldn't write a song or gush all your heartfelt feelings, just ask if she wants to do something with you. Stay centered in your own life, though. Keep busy with your own routine. Don't let your mood hang on what she says or does.
-------------------- Welcome evermore to gods and men is the self-helping man. For him all doors are flung wide: him all tongues greet, all honors crown, all eyes follow with desire. Our love goes out to him and embraces him, because he did not need it. ~ R.W. Emerson, "Self-Reliance"
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