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Registered: 04/01/02
Posts: 69
Loc: High Desert
Last seen: 20 years, 10 months
Dead for an hour and a half-full report
    #861378 - 09/03/02 10:01 AM (21 years, 5 months ago)

Death is not to be Feared. It is a Soul Choice

Mellen-Thomas Benedict is an artist who survived a near-death experience
in 1982. He was dead for over an hour and a half and during that time,
he rose up out of his body and went into the Light. Curious about the
universe, he was taken far into the remote depths of existence, and even
beyond, into the energetic Void of Nothingness behind the Big Bang.
Concerning his near-death experience, Dr. Kenneth Ring has said, "His
story is one of the most remarkable I have encountered in my extensive
research on near-death experiences."


"In 1982 I died from terminal cancer. The condition I had was inoperable,
and any kind of chemotherapy they could give me would just have made me
more of a vegetable. I was given six to eight months to live. I had been
an information freak in the 1970's, and I had become increasingly
despondent over the nuclear crisis, the ecology crisis, and so forth.

So, since I did not have a spiritual basis, I began to believe that
nature had made a mistake, and that we were probably a cancerous
organism on the planet. I saw no way that we could get out from all the
problems we had created for ourselves and the planet. I perceived all
humans as cancer, and that is what I got. That is what killed me. Be
careful what your world view is. It can feed back on you, especially if
it is a negative world view. I had a seriously negative one. That is
what led me into my death. I tried all sorts of alternative healing
methods, but nothing helped.

So I determined that this was really just between me and God. I had
never really faced God before, or even dealt with God. I was not into
any kind of spirituality at the time, but I began a journey into
learning about spirituality and alternative healing. I set out to do all
the reading I could and bone up on the subject, because I did not want
to be surprised on the other side. So I started reading on various
religions and philosophies. They were all very interesting, and gave
hope that there was something on the other side.

On the other hand, as a self-employed stained-glass artist at the time,
I had no medical insurance whatsoever. So my life savings went overnight
in testing. Then I was facing the medical profession without any kind of
insurance. I did not want to have my family dragged down financially, so
I determined to handle this myself. There was not constant pain, but
there were black-outs. I got so that I would not dare to drive, and
eventually I ended up in hospice care.

I had my own personal hospice caretaker. I was very blessed by this
angel who went through the last part of this with me. I lasted about
eighteen months. I did not want to take a lot of drugs, since I wanted
to be as conscious as possible. Then I experienced such pain that I had
nothing but pain in my consciousness, luckily only for a few days at a


I remember waking up one morning at home about 4:30 am, and I just knew
that this was it. This was the day I was going to die. So I called a few
friends and said goodbye. I woke up my hospice caretaker and told her. I
had a private agreement with her that she would leave my dead body alone
for six hours, since I had read that all kinds of interesting things
happen when you die. I went back to sleep.

The next thing I remember is the beginning of a typical near-death
experience. Suddenly I was fully aware and I was standing up, but my
body was in the bed. There was this darkness around me. Being out of my
body was even more vivid than ordinary experience. It was so vivid that
I could see every room in the house, I could see the top of the house, I
could see around the house, I could see under the house.

There was this Light shining. I turned toward the Light. The Light was
very similar to what many other people have described in their
near-death experiences. It was so magnificent. It is tangible; you can
feel it. It is alluring; you want to go to it like you would want to go
to your ideal mother's or father's arms. As I began to move toward the
Light, I knew intuitively that if I went to the Light, I would be dead.
So as I was moving toward the Light I said, "Please wait a minute, just
hold on a second here. I want to think about this; I would like to talk
to you before I go."

To my surprise, the entire experience halted at that point. You are
indeed in control of your near-death experience. You are not on a roller
coaster ride. So my request was honored and I had some conversations
with the Light. The Light kept changing into different figures, like
Jesus, Buddha, Krishna, mandalas, archetypal images and signs. I asked
the Light, "What is going on here? Please, Light, clarify yourself for
me. I really want to know the reality of the situation." I cannot really
say the exact words, because it was sort of telepathy.

The Light responded. The information transferred to me was that your
beliefs shape the kind of feedback you are getting before the Light. If
you were a Buddhist or Catholic or Fundamentalist, you get a feedback
loop of your own stuff. You have a chance to look at it and examine it,
but most people do not. As the Light revealed itself to me, I became
aware that what I was really seeing was our Higher Self matrix.

The only thing I can tell you is that it turned into a matrix, a mandala
of human souls, and what I saw was that what we call our Higher Self in
each of us is a matrix. It's also a conduit to the Source; each one of
us comes directly, as a direct experience from the Source. We all have a
Higher Self, or an oversoul part of our being. It revealed itself to me
in its truest energy form. The only way I can really describe it is that
the being of the Higher Self is more like a conduit. It did not look
like that, but it is a direct connection to the Source that each and
every one of us has. We are directly connected to the Source.

So the Light was showing me the Higher Self matrix. And it became very
clear to me that all the Higher Selves are connected as one being, all
humans are connected as one being, we are actually the same being,
different aspects of the same being. It was not committed to one
particular religion. So that is what was being fed back to me. And I saw
this mandala of human souls. It was the most beautiful thing I have ever
seen. I just went into it and, it was just over- whelming. It was like
all the love you've every wanted, and it was the kind of love that
cures, heals, regenerates.

As I asked the Light to keep explaining, I understood what the Higher
Self matrix is. We have a grid around the planet where all the Higher
Selves are connected. This is like a great company, a next subtle level
of energy around us, the spirit level, you might say. Then, after a
couple of minutes, I asked for more clarification. I really wanted to
know what the universe is about, and I was ready to go at that time. I
said "I am ready, take me." Then the Light turned into the most
beautiful thing that I have ever seen: a mandala of human souls on this

Now I came to this with my negative view of what has happen on the
planet. So as I asked the light to keep clarifying for me, I saw in this
magnificent mandala how beautiful we all are in our essence, our core.
We are the most beautiful creations. The human soul, the human matrix
that we all make together is absolutely fantastic, elegant, exotic,
every- thing. I just cannot say enough about how it changed my opinion
of human beings in that instant.

I said, "Oh, God, I did not know how beautiful we are." At any level,
high or low, in whatever shape you are in, you are the most beautiful
creation, you are. I was astonished to find that there was no evil in
any soul. I said "How can this be?" The answer was that no soul was
inherently evil. The terrible things that happened to people might make
them do evil things, but their souls were not evil. What all people
seek, what sustains them, is love, the Light told me. What distorts
people is a lack of love.

The revelations coming from the Light seemed to go on and on, then I
asked the Light, "Does this mean that humankind will be saved?" Then,
like a trumpet blast with a shower of spiraling lights, the Great Light
spoke, saying, "Remember this and never forget; you save, redeem and
heal yourself. You always have. You always will. You were created with
the power to do so from before the beginning of the world."

In that instant I realized even more. I realized that WE HAVE ALREADY
BEEN SAVED, and we saved ourselves because we were designed to
self-correct like the rest of God's universe. This is what the second
coming is about. I thanked the Light of God with all my heart. The best
thing I could come up with was these simple words of totally
appreciation: "Oh dear God, dear Universe, dear Great Self, I love my

The Light seemed to breathe me in even more deeply. It was as if the
Light was completely absorbing me. The Love Light is, to this day,
indescribable. I entered into another realm, more profound than the
last, and became aware of something more, much more. It was an enormous
stream of Light, vast and full, deep in the Heart of Life. I asked what
this was.

The Light responded, "This is the RIVER OF LIFE. Drink of this manna
water to your heart's content." So I did. I took one big drink and then
another. To drink of Life Itself! I was in ecstasy.

Then the Light said, "You have a desire." The Light knew all about me,
everything past, present and future.

"Yes!" I whispered.

I asked to see the rest of the Universe; beyond our solar system, beyond
all human illusion. The Light then told me that I could go with the
Stream. I did, and was carried through the Light at the end of the
tunnel. I felt and heard a series of very soft sonic booms. What a rush!


Suddenly I seemed to be rocketing away from the planet on this stream of
Life. I saw the earth fly away. The solar system, in all its splendor,
whizzed by and disappeared. At faster than light speed, I flew through
the center of the galaxy, absorbing more knowledge as I went. I learned
that this galaxy, and all of the Universe, is bursting with many
different varieties of LIFE. I saw many worlds. The good news is that we
are not alone in this Universe!

As I rode this stream of consciousness through the center of the galaxy,
the stream was expanding in awesome fractal waves of energy. The super
clusters of galaxies with all their ancient wisdom flew by. At first I
thought I was going somewhere; actually traveling. But then I realized
that, as the stream was expanding, my own consciousness was also
expanding to take in everything in the Universe! All creation passed by
me. It was an unimaginable wonder! I truly was a Wonder Child; a babe in

It seemed as if all the creations in the Universe soared by me and
vanished in a speck of Light. Almost immediately, a second Light
appeared. It came from all sides, and was so different; a Light made up
of more than every frequency in the Universe. I felt and heard several
velvety sonic booms again. My consciousness, or being, was expanding to
interface with the entire Holographic Universe and more.

As I passed into the second Light, the awareness came to me that I had
just transcended the Truth. Those are the best words I have for it, but
I will try to explain. As I passed into the second Light, I expanded
beyond the First Light. I found myself in a profound stillness, beyond
all silence. I could see or perceive FOREVER, beyond Infinity.

I was in the Void.

I was in pre-creation, before the Big Bang. I had crossed over the
beginning of time - the First Word - the First vibration. I was in the
Eye of Creation. I felt as if I was touching the Face of God. It was not
a religious feeling. Simply I was at one with Absolute Life and

When I say that I could see or perceive forever, I mean that I could
experience all of creation generating itself. It was without beginning
and without end. That's a mind-expanding thought, isn't it? Scientists

perceive the Big Bang as a single event which created the Universe. I
saw that the Big Bang is only one of an infinite number of Big Bangs
creating Universes endlessly and simultaneously. The only images that
even come close in human terms would be those created by supercomputers
using fractal geometry equations.

The ancients knew of this. They said Godhead periodically created new
Universes by breathing out, and de-creating other Universes by breathing
in. These epochs were called Yugas. Modern science called this the Big
Bang. I was in absolute, pure consciousness. I could see or perceive all
the Big Bangs or Yugas creating and de-creating themselves. Instantly I
entered into them all simultaneously. I saw that each and every little
piece of creation has the power to create. It is very difficult to try
to explain this. I am still speechless about this.

It took me years after I returned to assimilate any words at all for the
Void experience. I can tell you this now; the Void is less than nothing,
yet more than everything that is! The Void is absolute zero; chaos
forming all possibilities. It is Absolute Consciousness; much more than
even Universal Intelligence.

Where is the Void? I know. The Void is inside and outside everything.
You, right now even while you live, are always inside and outside the
Void simultaneously. You don't have to go anywhere or die to get there.
The Void is the vacuum or nothingness between all physical
manifestations. The SPACE between atoms and their components.

Modern science has begun to study this space between everything. They
call it Zero-point. Whenever they try to measure it, their instruments
go off the scale, or to infinity, so to speak. They have no way, as of
yet, to measure infinity accurately. There is more of the zero space in
your own body and the Universe than anything else!

What mystics call the Void is not a void. It is so full of energy, a
different kind of energy that has created everything that we are.
Everything since the Big Bang is vibration, from the first Word, which
is the first vibration. The biblical "I am" really has a question mark
after it. "I am - What am I?"

So creation is God exploring God's Self through every way imaginable, in
an ongoing, infinite exploration through every one of us. Through every
piece of hair on your head, through every leaf on every tree, through
every atom, God is exploring God's Self, the great "I am". I began to
see that everything that is, is the Self, literally, your Self, my Self.
Everything is the great Self. That is why God knows even when a leaf
falls. That is possible because wherever you are is the center of the
universe. Wherever any atom is, that is the center of the universe.
There is God in that, and God in the Void.

As I was exploring the Void and all the Yugas or creations, I was
completely out of time and space as we know it. In this expanded state,
I discovered that creation is about Absolute Pure Consciousness, or God,
coming into the Experience of Life as we know it. The Void itself is
devoid of experience. It is pre-life, before the first vibration.
Godhead is about more than Life and Death. Therefore there is even more
than Life and Death to experience in the Universe!

I was in the Void and I was aware of everything that had ever been
created. It was like I was looking out of God's eyes. I had become God.
Suddenly I wasn't me anymore. The only thing I can say, I was looking
out of God's eyes. And suddenly I knew why every atom was, and I could
see everything. The interesting point was that I went into the Void, I
came back with this understanding that God is not there. God is here.
That's what it is all about.

So this constant search of the human race to go out and find God ... God
gave everything to us, everything is here - this is where it's at. And
what we are into now is God's exploration of God through us. People are
so busy trying to become God that they ought to realize that we are
already God and God is becoming us. That's what it is really about.

When I realized this, I was finished with the Void, and wanted to return
to this creation, or Yuga. It just seemed like the natural thing to do.
Then I suddenly came back through the second Light, or the Big Bang,
hearing several more velvet booms. I rode the stream of consciousness
back through all of creation, and what a ride it was! The super clusters
of galaxies came through me with even more insights.

I passed through the center of our galaxy, which is a black hole. Black
holes are the great processors or recyclers of the Universe. Do you know
what is on the other side of a Black Hole? We are; our galaxy; which has
been reprocessed from another Universe. In its total energy
configuration, the galaxy looked like a fantastic city of lights. All
energy this side of the Big Bang is light. Every sub-atom, atom, star,
planet, even consciousness itself is made of light and has a frequency
and/or particle. Light is living stuff. Everything is made of light,
even stones. So everything is alive. Everything is made from the Light
of God; everything is very intelligent.


As I rode the stream on and on, I could eventually see a huge Light
coming. I knew it was the First Light; the Higher Self Light Matrix of
our solar system. Then the entire solar system appeared in the Light,
accompanied by one of those velvet booms.

I saw that the solar system we live in is our larger, local body. This
is our local body and we are much bigger than we imagine. I saw that the
solar system is our body. I am a part of this, and the earth is this
great created being that we are, and we are the part of it that knows
that it is. But we are only that part of it. We are not everything, but
we are that part of it that knows that it is.

I could see all the energy that this solar system generates, and it is
an incredible light show! I could hear the Music of the Spheres. Our
solar system, as do all celestial bodies, generates a unique matrix of
light, sound and vibratory energies. Advanced civilizations from other
star systems can spot life as we know it in the universe by the
vibratory or energy matrix imprint. It is child's play. The earth's
Wonder Child (human beings) make an abundance of sound right now, like
children playing in the backyard of the universe.

I rode the stream directly into the center of the Light. I felt embraced
by the Light as it took me in with its breath again, followed by another
soft sonic boom.

I was in this great Light of Love with the stream of life flowing
through me. I have to say again, it is the most loving, non-judgmental
Light. It is the ideal parent for this Wonder Child.

"What now?" I wondered.

The Light explained to me that there is no death; we are immortal
beings. We have already been alive forever! I realized that we are part
of a natural living system that recycles itself endlessly. I was never
told that I had to come back. I just knew that I would. It was only
natural, from what I had seen.

I don't know how long I was with the Light, in human time. But there
came a moment when I realized that all my questions had been answered
and my return was near. When I say that all my questions were answered
on the other side, I mean to say just that. All my questions have been
answered. Every human has a different life and set of questions to
explore. Some of our questions are Universal, but each of us is
exploring this thing we call Life in our own unique way. So is every
other form of life, from mountains to every leaf on every tree.

And that is very important to the rest of us in this Universe. Because
it all contributes to the Big Picture, the fullness of Life. We are
literally God exploring God's Self in an infinite Dance of Life. Your
uniqueness enhances all of Life.

His return to earth

As I began my return to the life cycle, it never crossed my mind, nor
was I told, that I would return to the same body. It just did not
matter. I had complete trust in the Light and the Life process. As the

stream merged with the great Light, I asked never to forget the
revelations and the feelings of what I had learned on the other side.

There was a "Yes". It felt like a kiss to my soul.

Then I was taken back through the Light into the vibratory realm again.
The whole process reversed, with even more information being given to
me. I came back home, and I was given lessons on the mechanics of
reincarnation. I was given answers to all those little questions I had:
"How does this work? How does that work?" I knew that I would be
reincarnated. The earth is a great processor of energy, and individual
consciousness evolves out of that into each one of us.

I thought of myself as a human for the first time, and I was happy to be
that. From what I have seen, I would be happy to be an atom in this
universe. An atom. So to be the human part of God ... this is the most
fantastic blessing. It is a blessing beyond our wildest estimation of
what blessing can be. For each and every one of us to be the human part
of this experience is awesome, and magnificent. Each and every one of
us, no matter where we are, screwed up or not, is a blessing to the
planet, right where we are.

So I went through the reincarnation process expecting to be a baby
somewhere. But I was given a lesson on how individual identity and
consciousness evolve. So I reincarnated back into this body. I was so
surprised when I opened my eyes. I do not know why, because I understood
it, but it was still such a surprise to be back in this body, back in my
room with someone looking over me crying her eyes out. It was my hospice
caretaker. She had given up an hour and a half after finding me dead.
She was sure I was dead; all the signs of death were there - I was
getting stiff.

We do not know how long I was dead, but we do know that it was an hour
and a half since I was found. She honored my wish to have my newly dead
body left alone for a few hours as much as she could. We had an
amplified stethoscope and many ways of checking out the vital functions
of the body to see what was happening. She can verify that I really was
dead. It was not a near-death experience. I experienced death itself for
at least an hour and a half. She found me dead and checked the
stethoscope, blood pressure and heart rate monitor for an hour and a
half. Then I awakened and saw the light outside. I tried to get up to go
to it, but I fell out of the bed. She heard a loud "clunk", ran in and
found me on the floor.

When I recovered, I was very surprised and yet very awed about what had
happened to me. At first all the memory of the trip that I have now was
not there. I kept slipping out of this world and kept asking, "Am I
alive?" This world seemed more like a dream than that one. Within three
days, I was feeling normal again, clearer, yet different than I had ever
felt in my life. My memory of the journey came back later. I could see
nothing wrong with any human being I had ever seen. Before that I was
really judgmental. I thought a lot of people were really screwed up, in
fact I thought that everybody was screwed up but me. But I got clear on
all that.

About three months later a friend said I should get tested, so I went
and got the scans and so forth. I really felt good, so I was afraid of
getting bad news. I remember the doctor at the clinic looking at the
before and after scans, saying, "Well, there is nothing here now." I
said, "Really, it must be a miracle?" He said "No, these things happen,
they are called spontaneous remission." He acted very unimpressed. But
here was a miracle, and I was impressed, even if no one else was.


The mystery of life has very little to do with intelligence. The
universe is not an intellectual process at all. The intellect is
helpful; it is brilliant, but right now that is all we process with,
instead of our hearts and the wiser part of ourselves.

The center of the earth is this great transmuter of energy, just as you
see in pictures of our earth's magnetic field. That's our cycle, pulling
reincarnated souls back in and through it again. A sign that you are
reaching human level is that you are beginning to evolve an individual

The animals have a group soul, and they reincarnate in group souls. A
deer is pretty much going to be a deer forever. But just being born a
human, whether deformed or genius, shows that you are on the path to
developing an individual consciousness. That is in itself part of the
group consciousness called humanity.

I saw that races are personality clusters. Nations like France, Germany
and China each have their own personality. Cities have personalities,
their local group souls that attract certain people. Families have group
souls. Individual identity is evolving like branches of a fractal; the
group soul explores in our individuality. The different questions that
each of us has are very, very important. This is how Godhead is
exploring God's Self - through you. So ask your questions, do your
searching. You will find your Self and you will find God in that Self,
because it is only the Self.

More than that, I began to see that each one of us humans are soul
mates. We are part of the same soul fractaling out in many creative
directions, but still the same. Now I look at every human being that I
ever see, and I see a soul mate, my soul mate, the one I have always
been looking for. Beyond that, the greatest soul mate that you will ever
have is yourself.

We are each both male and female. We experience this in the womb and we
experience this in reincarnation states. If you are looking for that
ultimate soul mate outside of yourself, you may never find it; it is not
there. Just as God is not "there". God is here. Don't look "out there"
for God. Look here for God. Look through your Self. Start having the
greatest love affair you ever had ... with your Self. You will love
everything out of that.

I had a descent into what you might call Hell, and it was very
surprising. I did not see Satan or evil. My descent into Hell was a
descent into each person's customized human misery, ignorance, and
darkness of not-knowing. It seemed like a miserable eternity. But each
of the millions of souls around me had a little star of light always
available. But no one seemed to pay attention to it. They were so
consumed with their own grief, trauma and misery. But, after what seemed
an eternity, I started calling out to that Light, like a child calling
to a parent for help.

Then the Light opened up and formed a tunnel that came right to me an
insulated me from all that fear and pain. That is what Hell really is.
So what we are doing is learning to hold hands, to come together. The
doors of Hell are open now. We are going to link up, hold hands, and
walk out of Hell together. The Light came to me and turned into a huge
golden angel. I said, "Are you the angel of death?" It expressed to me
that it was my oversoul, my Higher Self matrix, a super-ancient part of
ourselves. Then I was taken to the Light.

Soon our science will quantify spirit. Isn't that going to be wonderful?
We are coming up with devices now that are sensitive to subtle energy or
spirit energy. Physicists use these atomic colliders to smash atoms to
see what they are made of. They have got it down to quarks and charm,
and all that. Well, one day they are going to come down to the little
thing that holds it all together, and they are going to have to call
that ... God.

With atomic colliders they are not only seeing what is in here, but they
are creating particles. Thank God most of them are short-lived
milliseconds and nanoseconds. We are just beginning to understand that
we are creating too, as we go along. As I saw forever, I came to a realm
in which there is a point where we pass all knowledge and begin creating
the next fractal, the next level. We have that power to create as we
explore. And that is God expanding itself through us.

Since my return I have experienced the Light spontaneously, and I have
learned how to get to that space almost any time in my meditation. Each
one of you can do this. You do not have to die to do this. It is within
your equipment; you are wired for it already. The body is the most
magnificent Light being there is. The body is a universe of incredible
Light. Spirit is not pushing us to dissolve this body. That is not what
is happening. Stop trying to become God; God is becoming you. Here.

The mind is like a child running around the universe, demanding this and
thinking it created the world. But I ask the mind: "What did your mother
have to do with this?" That is the next level of spiritual awareness.
Oh! my mother! All of a sudden you give up the ego, because you are not
the only soul in the universe.

One of my questions to the Light was "What is Heaven?" I was given a
tour of all the heavens that have been created: the Nirvanas, the Happy
Hunting Grounds, all of them. I went through them. These are thought
form creations that we have created. We don't really go to heaven; we
are reprocessed.


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The Crying Orc
Registered: 07/29/02
Posts: 281
Loc: Valhalla
Last seen: 19 years, 10 months
Re: Dead for an hour and a half-full report [Re: amanita3]
    #861394 - 09/03/02 10:11 AM (21 years, 5 months ago)

dude u wanna kinda try and summaraize that cuz im gonna be honest, i dont kno many ppl that give a big enuff of a fuck to read that whole thing,lol. i am interested jus not gonna read the whole thing.lol


Long live...METAL!!!

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Registered: 04/01/02
Posts: 69
Loc: High Desert
Last seen: 20 years, 10 months
Re: Dead for an hour and a half-full report [Re: _VisioN_]
    #861408 - 09/03/02 10:21 AM (21 years, 5 months ago)

dud, it says all faggots burn in hell.  :wink:

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The Crying Orc
Registered: 07/29/02
Posts: 281
Loc: Valhalla
Last seen: 19 years, 10 months
Re: Dead for an hour and a half-full report [Re: amanita3]
    #861438 - 09/03/02 10:38 AM (21 years, 5 months ago)

lol agreed.


Long live...METAL!!!

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Registered: 01/21/02
Posts: 4,779
Last seen: 19 years, 4 months
Re: Dead for an hour and a half-full report [Re: amanita3]
    #861549 - 09/03/02 11:21 AM (21 years, 5 months ago)

All that in an hour and thirty minutes?


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Re: Dead for an hour and a half-full report [Re: amanita3]
    #861596 - 09/03/02 11:35 AM (21 years, 5 months ago)

maybe it was a DMT release?  :smile:

man = monkey + mushroom

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Day careobserver
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Re: Dead for an hour and a half-full report [Re: amanita3]
    #861675 - 09/03/02 12:13 PM (21 years, 5 months ago)

To those who thought the post too long,I feel for you.I could have read on for hrs.Having been near the LIGHT twice I am fascinated by others experience.It is a beautiful post to those who have experienced Gnosis......Peace WR

To old for this place

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Re: Dead for an hour and a half-full report [Re: whiterasta]
    #861743 - 09/03/02 12:44 PM (21 years, 5 months ago)

Well said, whiterasta; I, too, am a 'returnee', and can vouch for the validity of the experience.  :grin:

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WaRpInG &sPiRaLiNg
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Re: Dead for an hour and a half-full report [Re: whiterasta]
    #861758 - 09/03/02 12:51 PM (21 years, 5 months ago)

oh my god, this guy shows you the truth and you throw it away, i thank you kindlyor else ifeveryone realized it life would recycle itself again, i would like to keep it going for a while longer,let the tapekeep playing... Im sorry if you mentioned this bit god is at the centre of the universe radiating out in a rainbow prism encomposing all the 9 demensions of exsistance, the ninth being where everything recycles itself again, darkness.

" liken this life illusory, for your sand castle will one day be adrift amongst the wind "

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You may say I'ma dreamer...

Registered: 06/20/02
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Re: Dead for an hour and a half-full report [Re: amanita3]
    #861842 - 09/03/02 01:33 PM (21 years, 5 months ago)

Man, I have to say this is shockingly exciting because it was EXACTLY on target with my beliefs...I read every word and it is just so cool that two people who have never met or ever had any contact whatsoever came up with similar experiences and IDENTICAL opinions!


Shroomalicious - :smile: I love you and in doing so I love myself, because we ARE all one :smile: - "An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth leaves the whole world blind and toothless". - Mahatma Ghandi

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Re: Dead for an hour and a half-full report [Re: amanita3]
    #862236 - 09/03/02 05:26 PM (21 years, 5 months ago)

Don't take this the wrong way but I think the guy is a certifiable nut case. Here's the first clue:

"I had been an information freak in the 1970's, and I had become increasingly
despondent over the nuclear crisis, the ecology crisis, and so forth.

To me this says that he has a lot of emotional/mental problems which became evident when he had his NDE and the conclusions he drew from it.

I do not rely on experiences for what I think to be true. I use a hi-test blend of logic, reason, experience and intuition to come to my conclusions.

He had become, "increasingly despondent over the ecological crisis"??? Please.

Yeah, right. That reminds me of a buddy of mine that drank real heavy. He just sat on a bar stool night after night getting bombed without saying a word. Finally the bartender says, "Hey buddy, what's getting to you? You drink more than anyone in here."

My friend looks up and looks him straight in the eyes and says one word:


The barkeep's face softened and he said, "Oh, that's too bad. I didn't know you went to 'Nam."

My friend looked in him the eyes again and with a completely straight face said:

"I didn't. I just think the whole thing was my fault."

True story!

Anybody that obesses over things they have no control of is mentally unbalanced and/or emotionally unstable.

I don't want to hurt anybody's feelings or disabuse them of their misguided notions but I felt this needed to be addressed.

Have a good one,

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Re: Dead for an hour and a half-full report [Re: amanita3]
    #863230 - 09/04/02 08:20 AM (21 years, 5 months ago)

This is a wonderful post, amanita3. Thank you for sharing.

Believe me or not I have realized more than half of those truths within my own psychedelic experiences. It made me very happy and peacefull for a long time... I am fucking miserable now. I hate life and I have no love for anything or anyone. I feel all my compassion and empathy for any other soul has been stripped away from me. The only thing I can do now is suffer day to day and try to feel again. I fucking hate EVERYTHING. I hate my parents, I hate my ex-girlfriend, I hate my friends. and worst of all I hate my fucking self. I wish death upon myself everyday but I know without a doubt it won't come to me.. there's some reason for me suffering my entire life.. I _just_ can't wait to find out what that is. fuck life.

"I see!" said the blind man to his deaf wife.

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Re: Dead for an hour and a half-full report [Re: Chikhai]
    #863253 - 09/04/02 08:37 AM (21 years, 5 months ago)

one half ounce of liberty caps dried is exactly the same, no diferent.
be god and have faith in yourself

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Day careobserver
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Re: Dead for an hour and a half-full report [Re: Mitchnast]
    #863371 - 09/04/02 10:03 AM (21 years, 5 months ago)

I use large doses of semillanceata to control atrial fibrillation in my heart.During peak my pulse has dropped to 28bpm and my B/P was 98/72 But I never feel any distress over this and the results are always positive(2-5 weeks of healthy heart rythymn) BTW this IS the only treatment for AF besides scarring my heart nerves.I'll take the Fungus any day! Bon Chance WR

To old for this place

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Re: Dead for an hour and a half-full report [Re: whiterasta]
    #863446 - 09/04/02 10:57 AM (21 years, 5 months ago)

Do only liberty caps have that effect?


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Re: Dead for an hour and a half-full report [Re: Revelation]
    #864039 - 09/04/02 04:40 PM (21 years, 5 months ago)

I will find out this fall about azurescens,cyanescens,and baeocystis from my O/D beds(hopefully).Cubies are for partying though they just dont seem to have the same body load(much lighter) as the others so maybe are not as effective.This is where a less paranoid society would investigate this effect clinicaly but I just don't see prescription fungi for A/F patients (even if it is the only effective treatment I've found,and has literaly amazed the cardiologist I USED to see) Peace WR :wink:

To old for this place

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Re: Dead for an hour and a half-full report [Re: amanita3]
    #868767 - 09/07/02 10:44 AM (21 years, 5 months ago)

Really cool post. It's weird, that was like putting a few of my high dose psychedlic trips into words, even though I have never been able to.

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Re: Dead for an hour and a half-full report [Re: amanita3]
    #922150 - 10/01/02 09:29 AM (21 years, 4 months ago)

i had this thread saved on my hard drive and i just got around to reading it. i figured i'd bump it back up just incase someone missed it. :smile:

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\/\/¡†¢h |-|øµ§³ ¢å†
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Re: Dead for an hour and a half-full report [Re: Smack31]
    #922395 - 10/01/02 11:09 AM (21 years, 4 months ago)

Good call, Smack. I enjoyed it...

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People of the sun.
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Re: Dead for an hour and a half-full report [Re: Zahid]
    #922465 - 10/01/02 11:36 AM (21 years, 4 months ago)

just amazing... 

I read every word and it is just so cool that two people who have never met or ever had any contact whatsoever came up with similar experiences and IDENTICAL opinions!

well... make that 3 people  :grin: hehehe... but i think it is natural that 2, 3, 4 heck thousands of people come to this conclusion... everyone in their own way... there will be a time where everyone will awake... and i certainly don't want to wait any longer...
for all those who where too lazy to read that... rethink it... maybe save it and read it later, but it is worth it..


Edited by Lozt Soul (10/01/02 12:19 PM)

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