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Boutang
AKMC
Registered: 01/25/06
Posts: 1,660
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Once when I was five, again when I was thirty.
-------------------- North to the future is our motto I'm still up north no future to follow We do these things and we don't give a fuck, we fire up a blunt in the car bumping Cougnut.
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Asante
Omnicyclion prophet
Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 87,230
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I was staying at a friends house one time and took a morning shower when all of a sudden I had to take a dump. The toilet was right there so I thought what the hey. But I slipped and fell on the ground and in sheer shock I shat myself. Diarrhea, just my luck. So I was lying there dripping wet in my own shit and thought now what.
So I got up, took the shower-head and wet the floor to clean it up. By then the floor was covered in light brown muck and man it reeked.
So I walked to the closet to see what it held and I fell again, on the poop covered floor. I got up again and you wouldn't believe it: I inadvertently had made a poop angel on his bathroom floor trying to get up. Art man.
I opened the closet and guess what: no towels to mop up the shit. And my whole back was dripping watery diluted diarrhea. Damn, now what?
So I just wiped my body off on his shower curtain, but the thing was water-repellent so by the time I was through it was completely covered in poo.
I showered off but the bits clogged the drain so I said fuck it, turned the shower off and stepped out of the muddy water.
Now what, still no towels. I spotted the guy's bathrobe so I put it on and rubbed myself to get dry. As I went for my clothes I fell again because of the goop on the floor and now the shit was all over his bathrobe too. So I got bunches of TP (all that was left of the roll) and tried to rub it off but it only got worse anbd spread out.
I gave up and hung the shit stained robe to dry, threw the TP into the toilet and flushed. Well that got clogged too and the damn thing overflowed, so I took the coathanger of his robe and poked it up, but the pincher of the designer coathanger got snagged in the toilet somehow and I couldn't get it out so I said fuck it and left it in there.
I wiped my shit stained feet on his bath mat, got dressed and got the fuck out of there, feeling I had worn out my welcome.
I wish I had a recording of the phonecall he gave me when he had gotten up two hours later and wanted to take a morning pee.
-------------------- Omnicyclion.org higher knowledge starts here
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PinballWizard
Naive and Gullible as usual
Registered: 03/20/04
Posts: 2,804
Last seen: 9 years, 11 months
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Re: who poops in the shower? [Re: Asante]
#8209711 - 03/29/08 10:19 AM (15 years, 11 months ago) |
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So funny.
This deserves some sort of "MASSIVE FAIL" pic.
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OneMoreRobot3021
Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 61,024
Loc: the sky
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Re: who poops in the shower? [Re: Asante]
#8209714 - 03/29/08 10:22 AM (15 years, 11 months ago) |
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...wow
-------------------- Acid doesn't give you truths; it builds machines that push the envelope of perception. Whatever revelations came to me then have dissolved like skywriting. All I really know is that those few years saddled me with a faith in the redemptive potential of the imagination which, however flat, stale and unprofitable the world seems to me now, I cannot for the life of me shake. -Erik Davis
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Asante
Omnicyclion prophet
Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 87,230
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...I made all that shit up of course, but it's inspired by the apparently true story of this post.
Seriously OP, nobody in their right mind will poop in the shower. What did you expect starting a thread like this?
-------------------- Omnicyclion.org higher knowledge starts here
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norml840
sex toy guru
Registered: 10/19/07
Posts: 3,170
Loc: lost
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Re: who poops in the shower? [Re: Asante]
#8209736 - 03/29/08 10:31 AM (15 years, 11 months ago) |
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that was awesome
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NationofStrangers
Beeeeyah!!!!
Registered: 09/25/03
Posts: 515
Loc: Austin TX
Last seen: 14 years, 10 months
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Re: who poops in the shower? [Re: norml840]
#8209956 - 03/29/08 12:10 PM (15 years, 11 months ago) |
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When i was in a half way house someone kept shitting in the shower. some how the got it all over the walls and stuff... it was extremely gross....... but luckily it never happened when it was my job to clean up the bathrooms...
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RonaldFuckingPaul
Our Dear Leader
Registered: 10/31/07
Posts: 13,617
Loc: Straight Outta Compton
Last seen: 9 years, 7 months
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LOL
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Oracle Of Delphi
I, Phantom
Registered: 06/23/02
Posts: 1,135
Loc: State of Disrepair
Last seen: 15 years, 4 months
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as long as you don't do it in my shower, i could give 2 craps what you do. (pun intended)
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niteowl
GrandPaw
Registered: 07/01/03
Posts: 16,291
Loc:
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Re: who poops in the shower? [Re: Asante]
#8210606 - 03/29/08 02:29 PM (15 years, 11 months ago) |
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Wiccan........I haven't laughed that hard in a long fucking time.
Thanks.
-------------------- Live for the moment you are in nowDon't be bogged down by your pastDon't be afraid of what lies in your future
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Asante
Omnicyclion prophet
Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 87,230
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Re: who poops in the shower? [Re: niteowl]
#8213132 - 03/30/08 12:08 AM (15 years, 11 months ago) |
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no you thanks
-------------------- Omnicyclion.org higher knowledge starts here
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LeftyBurnz
Mr. I Eat Butthole
Registered: 06/21/05
Posts: 24,570
Loc: FL
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Re: who poops in the shower? [Re: Asante]
#8213288 - 03/30/08 01:43 AM (15 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
Wiccan_Seeker said: I was staying at a friends house one time and took a morning shower when all of a sudden I had to take a dump. The toilet was right there so I thought what the hey. But I slipped and fell on the ground and in sheer shock I shat myself. Diarrhea, just my luck. So I was lying there dripping wet in my own shit and thought now what.
So I got up, took the shower-head and wet the floor to clean it up. By then the floor was covered in light brown muck and man it reeked.
So I walked to the closet to see what it held and I fell again, on the poop covered floor. I got up again and you wouldn't believe it: I inadvertently had made a poop angel on his bathroom floor trying to get up. Art man.
I opened the closet and guess what: no towels to mop up the shit. And my whole back was dripping watery diluted diarrhea. Damn, now what?
So I just wiped my body off on his shower curtain, but the thing was water-repellent so by the time I was through it was completely covered in poo.
I showered off but the bits clogged the drain so I said fuck it, turned the shower off and stepped out of the muddy water.
Now what, still no towels. I spotted the guy's bathrobe so I put it on and rubbed myself to get dry. As I went for my clothes I fell again because of the goop on the floor and now the shit was all over his bathrobe too. So I got bunches of TP (all that was left of the roll) and tried to rub it off but it only got worse anbd spread out.
I gave up and hung the shit stained robe to dry, threw the TP into the toilet and flushed. Well that got clogged too and the damn thing overflowed, so I took the coathanger of his robe and poked it up, but the pincher of the designer coathanger got snagged in the toilet somehow and I couldn't get it out so I said fuck it and left it in there.
I wiped my shit stained feet on his bath mat, got dressed and got the fuck out of there, feeling I had worn out my welcome.
I wish I had a recording of the phonecall he gave me when he had gotten up two hours later and wanted to take a morning pee.
OMG i just went back to read this thread from where it left off last night.... i have never laughed so hard in my life wiccan...... my shirt is stained with tears and my ribs feel like chuck liddell beat the shit out of them, and i spit whiskey and 7up all over my desk..... seriously.... thanks for the laugh.
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LeftyBurnz
Mr. I Eat Butthole
Registered: 06/21/05
Posts: 24,570
Loc: FL
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Re: who poops in the shower? [Re: Asante] 1
#8213291 - 03/30/08 01:45 AM (15 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
Wiccan_Seeker said: ...I made all that shit up of course.
well now thats just downright disapointing wiccan.
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Helixx
Mood:Fragglerocked
Registered: 06/07/07
Posts: 1,623
Last seen: 10 years, 4 months
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Re: who poops in the shower? [Re: LeftyBurnz]
#8213372 - 03/30/08 02:40 AM (15 years, 11 months ago) |
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dissapointing, but i still had fun reading it
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Asante
Omnicyclion prophet
Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 87,230
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Re: who poops in the shower? [Re: LeftyBurnz]
#8216939 - 03/30/08 10:07 PM (15 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
OMG i just went back to read this thread from where it left off last night.... i have never laughed so hard in my life wiccan...... my shirt is stained with tears and my ribs feel like chuck liddell beat the shit out of them, and i spit whiskey and 7up all over my desk..... seriously.... thanks for the laugh.
That's what counts Leftysurprise, I'm glad you got something good out of it.
If that went down I'd be a complete bastard though
-------------------- Omnicyclion.org higher knowledge starts here
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mushfan01
Stranger
Registered: 03/30/08
Posts: 206
Last seen: 15 years, 11 months
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Re: who poops in the shower? [Re: truekimbo2]
#8216950 - 03/30/08 10:09 PM (15 years, 11 months ago) |
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ive shit in the ocean a few times. u never know where it is though so its kinda risky.
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misterdogman
Educationalresearcher ofthe Shroom
Registered: 03/17/08
Posts: 644
Loc: International Waters in a...
Last seen: 10 years, 11 months
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Re: who poops in the shower? [Re: Asante]
#8217374 - 03/30/08 11:14 PM (15 years, 11 months ago) |
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Yeah thanks, you also could have called me back too fucker. LOL.
-------------------- While driving my overpowered car around tight corners like a maniac all my friends yell out. Hey man slow down, we might Wreck. I reply, Shut up, I drive like Dale Earnhardt. They all look around at each other and laugh. Then one asks me. Hey wait, isnt he dead? Well yeah he is I said. Then I drive like Junior I mumble, while I promptly slow down. "Everyday is opposite day. Everything I say is opposite of what you think I am saying. So if I say something and you think I mean one thing it is the opposite of what I am really trying to say. I actually mean another thing other than what you are thinking I am saying. Get it? Good because that's what I meant". "You may defeat me, you may even destroy me, But you will never CONQUER me"!
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blissedout
Registered: 11/11/04
Posts: 22,320
Loc: Yonder
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Re: who poops in the shower? [Re: LeftyBurnz]
#8217419 - 03/30/08 11:25 PM (15 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
leftysurprise said:
Quote:
rugergirl79 said: if there was corn in it, it wouldnt fit in the grate to the drain.....what would ya do about the corn...pick it up and flush?
it'll mash into the holes.
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Tangerines
Registered: 04/17/05
Posts: 17,918
Loc: woodwork
Last seen: 4 years, 2 months
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I shat in the shower last week half on accident.
It cleaned up well.
I don't make a habit of it though.
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lsdPSYCHosis
Stranger
Registered: 03/27/08
Posts: 54
Last seen: 15 years, 11 months
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Quote:
Psilocybeingzz said: Answer.
Children.
Grow up.
shit, child or not, you could still mash it up with your toes, and let it go down the drain. have to clean the shit off of your feet though, what a mess!
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