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 backfromthedead
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Registered: 03/10/07
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Personally I needed to map the duality back onto known characters or concepts in mythology. Archetypes and shite.
Only then, mostly when the fear subsided, could the whip be cracked effectively.
March ya'll!! Double time.
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 EternalCowabunga
Being of Great Significance
 
Registered: 04/04/05
Posts: 7,152
Loc: Time and Space
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Quote:
Personally I needed to map the duality back onto known characters or concepts in mythology. Archetypes and shite.
That's good thinking. What bothers me about the schizophrenic part of us is that it is almost instantly self-perpetuating. What is it anyway? It's a closed loop that is more like a black hole.
AlteredAgain's description (or the card's description) is spot on
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backfromthedead
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'What bothers me about the schizophrenic part of us is that it is almost instantly self-perpetuating. What is it anyway? It's a closed loop that is more like a black hole.'
Can you expand on this at all??
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EternalCowabunga
Being of Great Significance
Registered: 04/04/05
Posts: 7,152
Loc: Time and Space
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"It never used to be like this..."
"It isn't like this"
"This doesn't work"
"I should be able to ignore this but it is all I know"
"If I do this, that will make this part go away"
"I will just wait here until this all clears itself out"
self perpetuating thoughts centered around something that can't even be found - looking for it is being it, trying to track it only affirms it, IMO
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Edited by EternalCowabunga (03/06/08 01:36 PM)
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backfromthedead
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I've found that instead of using words large inner strides can be made with the use of mental imagery instead.
You just have to be willing to play All of your cards.
Does two pair beat three of a kind??
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backfromthedead
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'trying to track it only affirms it'
Exactly.
'If we affirm one moment, we thus affirm not only ourselves but all existence. For nothing is self-sufficient, neither in us ourselves nor in things; and if our soul has trembled with happiness and sounded like a harp string just once, all eternity was needed to produce this one event - and in this single moment of affirmation all eternity was called good, redeemed, justified, and affirmed.'
—Nietzsche, Friedrich
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DimensionX
King of Birds
Registered: 09/26/07
Posts: 5,486
Loc: Australia 
Last seen: 1 year, 4 months
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They took away my rights and locked me in a ward without a court case or any form of trial too backfromthedead. How they think those places would help a mentally ill person i don't know. They put me on Risperdol but it didn't work, so they gave me Solian and it did. Although i learn heaps from experiences in a schizophrenic mind frame, i also find i unlearn certain things. Its kind of like the opposite of Zen. Theres is no peace or stillness in your mind, just uncontrolled chaos. Eventually it becomes a constant struggle to function in everyday society. Going to work is hell, and it impacts your sleep allot, because you spend all night awake listening to your mind which refuses to sleep. So, overall I'm thankful that the medication exists, but its wrong that they can force it on you against your will.
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backfromthedead
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 Re: Schizophrenia  [Re: DimensionX] 1
#8111822 - 03/06/08 04:19 PM (15 years, 3 months ago) |
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'So, overall I'm thankful that the medication exists, but its wrong that they can force it on you against your will.'
I hear you. I agree.
IM doses in the top of the ass cheek are far from productive, imo.
Do you contribute your coming out of this experience to the meds then?? Were you diagnosed if you don't mind me asking??
Cannabis has helped me enormously but so far I can't convince anyone of the benefit to mental marijuana.
'Eventually it becomes a constant struggle to function in everyday society.'
The only other thing that has helped me through this is my half belief in the reality of God, even if it is just me and my brain.
I noticed what thoughts would produce that tingly tranquility and I followed them. I guess a lesson in love. I felt guided. I also noted what emotions would lock me into a snaky trance. I kept these.
I think it important to note that the drug induced schizophrenic break is not necessarily classic schizophrenia as its defined by modern medicine and brain scans. In my case schizophrenia was ruled out but I was discharged as gravely disabled by the county. WTF?? Feels like punishment for exploring my mind and making a scene.
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backfromthedead
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'How they think those places would help a mentally ill person i don't know.'
Did you view yourself as mentally ill at the time??
I was under the impression that what I was on about was an accurate reflection.
My psychiatrist told me that I was more 'cranked up' than most about it.
Life I guess.
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Droz
Love of Life
Registered: 10/15/00
Posts: 2,746
Loc: Floorida
Last seen: 7 years, 9 months
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Do you guys, "hear voices" etc.?
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Evolution of Time.
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backfromthedead
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Re: Schizophrenia [Re: Droz] 1
#8111992 - 03/06/08 04:51 PM (15 years, 3 months ago) |
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Not all the time. It was worse.
I would more appropriately say that I 'talk to myself'.
Or that I respond to internal stimuli because of its presentation as other.
I find that if I verbally acknowledge this phenomena rather than wish it away my intended effect carries more weight.
It is easy to fall into the frame of mind that I am talking to god, spirits, ancestors, masters, guides, fuckin ALIENS , etc...
I balance with doubt.
I recognize that this voice phenomena could be the inspiration behind many beliefs.
I feel that this relationship is novel however seemingly fragmented.
Maybe I just need a friend.
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AlteredAgain
Visual Alchemist
Registered: 04/27/06
Posts: 11,180
Loc: Solar Circuit
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e-hug coming your way!
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backfromthedead
Activated
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Thanks.
Send one to Amber for me.
Loosing her while loosing my mind was trying.
Only person I've ever felt it from physically.
Sad that she had to see a subjective sledgehammer to the knees like misery.
If only the modern paradigm accounted for this experience spiritually.
I knew I was in the story as the hero.
Treatment.
No better way to make a kid feel zero.
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DimensionX
King of Birds
Registered: 09/26/07
Posts: 5,486
Loc: Australia
Last seen: 1 year, 4 months
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I got diagnosed as psychotic from excess marijuana use. At the time i didn't think i was mentally ill, and i still don't really think i was in the normal sense. Sure i flipped out a bit and had some strange fantasy's which gotten taken to far, but considering what i was experiencing it doesn't seem so crazy. I heard voices in my head, sometimes they actually taught me things i never knew before. My thoughts became in a way disconnected from myself, which can be an enlightening experience. But i also had some really bad delusional thoughts. Mainly i thought that everyone could read my mind, and that it was other humans speaking into it. When you have to go around in your everyday life thinking everyone knows what your thinking, it can get pretty crazy. I personally don't think the medical community fully understands what is going on with psychosis and schizophrenia. I did experience things which are hard to explain and understand.
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backfromthedead
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Re: Schizophrenia [Re: DimensionX] 1
#8112405 - 03/06/08 06:04 PM (15 years, 3 months ago) |
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'When you have to go around in your everyday life thinking everyone knows what your thinking, it can get pretty crazy.'
I know exactly what you mean.
Thought broadcasting and thought insertion.
I haven't ruled out the idea of telepathy yet.
I almost want it to be real.
I've had some peculiar experiences that suggest it might be.
Walking around seemingly broadcasting is a good lesson in ridding your game of shame, imo.
'I did experience things which are hard to explain and understand.'
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Edited by backfromthedead (03/06/08 06:05 PM)
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Lion
Decadent Flower Magnate
Registered: 09/20/05
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Last seen: 19 hours, 9 minutes
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Quote:
'When you have to go around in your everyday life thinking everyone knows what your thinking, it can get pretty crazy.'
I KNOW that there are some who know 'my' thoughts. But the way I'm thinking about it isn't accurate, so I try not to think about it.
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“Strengthened by contemplation and study,
I will not fear my passions like a coward.
My body I will give to pleasures,
to diversions that I’ve dreamed of,
to the most daring erotic desires,
to the lustful impulses of my blood, without
any fear at all, for whenever I will—
and I will have the will, strengthened
as I’ll be with contemplation and study—
at the crucial moments I’ll recover
my spirit as was before: ascetic.”
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DimensionX
King of Birds
Registered: 09/26/07
Posts: 5,486
Loc: Australia
Last seen: 1 year, 4 months
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Quote:
backfromthedead said:
Walking around seemingly broadcasting is a good lesson in ridding your game of shame, imo
It definitely does, it makes you morally analyse yourself really deeply as well. Its hell at work though, also really hard in social situations. Its made me really good at holding myself together in stressful situations though.
Edited by DimensionX (03/06/08 08:49 PM)
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backfromthedead
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Re: Schizophrenia [Re: DimensionX] 1
#8113304 - 03/06/08 09:01 PM (15 years, 3 months ago) |
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'Its made me really good at holding myself together in stressful situations though.'
Right on.
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redgreenvines
irregular verb
Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 34,988
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Re: Schizophrenia [Re: Lion] 1
#8113314 - 03/06/08 09:03 PM (15 years, 3 months ago) |
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i guess you don't need me to talk about persistent personality streams (i.e. the big thought tracers that encompass entire attitude formations and routines) these streams last much longer than usual, overlapping and co-residing with subsequent attitude formations.
these big tracers add personalities and seem to speak with total autonomy sharing space with other conscious wakes.
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spiritualemerg
Stranger
Registered: 03/28/07
Posts: 366
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OrgoneConclusion: You already started a thread on this.
No, I didn't.
Yes, you did.
Did not.
Oh, be quiet.
No, YOU shut up!
Now, you are making us look bad.
Thanks for raising the issue Orgone, and for presenting a commonly misunderstood aspect of the "schizophrenic" experience.
Quote:
Contrary to popular misunderstanding the term "schizophrenia" does not refer to multiple personality syndrome. The Greek etymology of the word actually means "broken soul" or "broken heart".
-- Michael O'Callaghan
Nice pic, backfromthedead. By the way, did you happen to catch this post: Presumed Causes of Psychosis & Schizophrenia. I think I put it together after I was last here.
Music of the Hour: Father & Son
.
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~ Kindness is cheap. It's unkindness that always demands the highest price.
Blogs: Spiritual Emergency | Spiritual Recovery | Voices of Recovery | A Jungian Approach to Psychosis
Edited by spiritualemerg (03/06/08 09:15 PM)
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