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Unfolding Nature Shop: Unfolding Nature: Being in the Implicate Order

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OfflineHyper_Panda_GO
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Registered: 05/28/06
Posts: 9,720
Last seen: 10 years, 8 months
Critique my story ideas
    #8071122 - 02/26/08 01:10 AM (15 years, 11 months ago)

I require the feedback of the internet

A boy discovers the inside of his cheeks have the queer ability to regenerate themselves, so he just starts chewing on them whenever he's bored or hungry. This odd little ability somehow culminates in an international cult with a brutal philosophy of what to do with the human body. Also, his softball playing girlfriend develops oral cancer after a long habit of chewing tobacco

The Balloonist

A balloonist and his talking balloon animal, Gregor the giraffe, travels the country dispensing rainbow colored rubbers that take the bearer away to their dreamland. He does not underestimate the turmoil and disintegration the families suffer when their loved one goes inexplicably missing.

War of the Pens

Two very talented men are in fierce competition to write a book for a failing publication company, Humdrum and Looms, thus securing a hefty contract. One stands to pay the hospital bills or lose his son to leukemia. One stands to pay his bookie or lose his life to the mob


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InvisibleCaptainH13
Scum
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Registered: 10/29/04
Posts: 10,287
Re: Critique my story ideas [Re: Hyper_Panda_GO]
    #8071135 - 02/26/08 01:16 AM (15 years, 11 months ago)

1st. Cults are fun but thats a stretch.

2nd. how's the balloon stay inflated? how'd it come to life? How does condoms come into the story?. lots of odd stuff to string together.


3rd. I dig it. it could get boring though,but definatly the best.


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OfflinePinballWizard
Naive and Gullible as usual

Registered: 03/20/04
Posts: 2,804
Last seen: 9 years, 9 months
Re: Critique my story ideas [Re: Hyper_Panda_GO]
    #8071139 - 02/26/08 01:18 AM (15 years, 11 months ago)

Just write the stories. There's really no telling.


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InvisibleMerkin
neep.
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Registered: 07/04/03
Posts: 27,537
Loc: Ass Flavoured Pie Factory
Re: Critique my story ideas [Re: Hyper_Panda_GO]
    #8071148 - 02/26/08 01:23 AM (15 years, 11 months ago)

I liked the Cheeks boy :lol:


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Wheels of cheese wheeels of cheeeeese!!!


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Invisiblemayfly
.
Female


Registered: 01/05/08
Posts: 800
Loc: planet home
Re: Critique my story ideas [Re: Merkin]
    #8071227 - 02/26/08 02:07 AM (15 years, 11 months ago)

1 - Could be interesting if done right.
2 - Not a fan.
3 - Good concept, my favorite of the three.


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"The important thing to remember: if we ship all our fat-bottomed girls off to foreign countries, the terrorists win."


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OfflineDimensionX
King of Birds
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Registered: 09/26/07
Posts: 5,486
Loc: Australia Flag
Last seen: 2 years, 2 days
Re: Critique my story ideas [Re: Hyper_Panda_GO]
    #8071377 - 02/26/08 04:26 AM (15 years, 10 months ago)

The first two are totally bizzare and hillarious and then the third one sounds like an ordinary kind of book. Id go with the first two.


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InvisibleJPMorgan

Registered: 01/24/08
Posts: 256
Re: Critique my story ideas [Re: DimensionX]
    #8071513 - 02/26/08 07:22 AM (15 years, 10 months ago)

1. Fail.
2. Fail.
3. Roll with it, dude. :thumbup:


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InvisibleWhiskeyClone
Not here
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Registered: 06/25/01
Posts: 16,509
Loc: Longitudinal Center of Canada ...
Re: Critique my story ideas [Re: Hyper_Panda_GO]
    #8071693 - 02/26/08 09:15 AM (15 years, 10 months ago)

I like number one the best. You could delve into commentary about all kinds of interesting issues; the sanctity of human life, the rights to our own bodies, asceticism...

The premise isn't what's going to make the story good or bad; do whichever one inspires you most.


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Welcome evermore to gods and men is the self-helping man.  For him all doors are flung wide: him all tongues greet, all honors crown, all eyes follow with desire.  Our love goes out to him and embraces him, because he did not need it.

~ R.W. Emerson, "Self-Reliance"

:heartpump:


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OfflineDragonChaser
Ice in Her Ass and Pussy
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Registered: 04/27/06
Posts: 7,212
Last seen: 6 years, 2 months
Re: Critique my story ideas [Re: Hyper_Panda_GO]
    #8072543 - 02/26/08 01:27 PM (15 years, 10 months ago)

I like each one of them.
The first 2 sound nuts and the last one sounds more mainstream. Definitely work with all 3. Are you writing a book of short stories? Or are you working on 3 separate novels?


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My name is Mud


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OfflineHyper_Panda_GO
Team Action!


Registered: 05/28/06
Posts: 9,720
Last seen: 10 years, 8 months
Re: Critique my story ideas [Re: DragonChaser]
    #8074680 - 02/26/08 09:15 PM (15 years, 10 months ago)

I'm thinking of short stories for the first two and a novel for the second, but they all have potential for either


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Unfolding Nature Shop: Unfolding Nature: Being in the Implicate Order


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