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Majawala
Stranger
Registered: 06/08/06
Posts: 61
Last seen: 13 years, 2 months
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Stuck and confused
#8033917 - 02/17/08 08:01 AM (15 years, 11 months ago) |
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so i can either keep up my ssri routine which is helpfully numbing all the things i can't deal with when I am off them or stop them and try ayahuasca which I feel would help my understand and deal with my problems instead of just suppressing them. The problem is I want to goto South America to do ayahuasca because I'm scared to do it alone. But I could just face my fears and do it at home which would be so much cheaper but I theres a problem....
I live with my mom so I would have to convince her to let me do it here which I'm not sure if I should even bring up because she is going through a seperation with my dad and saying that I want to do what she consider to be 'drugs' might hurt her and make her think there is something even more wrong with her already troubled son. also if i came off the ssri's i doubt i could get a job because being around people would make me feel crazy again. But I've been looking for a job and can't seem to find or get one.
i feel so freakin stuck. I dunno what to do. All i want to do is feel real and 'normal' again and hopefully find inspiration which i am completly lacking right now.
I mean I can do anything I want. I feel like the world might be changing drastically in the near future so going to university might be a waste of time. I could just goto montreal and learn how to act with a group of people i really like and maybe learn to be a yoga instructer and glass blower and get by with those things. or I could become an engineer or goto film school. Its strangely crippiling knowing you can do anything you put your mind too. My economics teacher in high school told me that being good at everything would be my biggest problem.
any ideas? anyone been through something like this?
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Coaster
Baʿal



Registered: 05/22/06
Posts: 33,501
Loc: Deep in the Valley
Last seen: 12 years, 3 months
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Re: Stuck and confused [Re: Majawala]
#8034686 - 02/17/08 01:11 PM (15 years, 11 months ago) |
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eat right and exercise, doctors say that cures depression as good as any ssri and possibly ayahuasca exercise maaaan, it helps ur seritonin flowwwww
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appleorange
Rainbow Technician



Registered: 12/30/07
Posts: 4,868
Loc: Reykjavík
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Re: Stuck and confused [Re: Coaster]
#8034733 - 02/17/08 01:28 PM (15 years, 11 months ago) |
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ayahuasca is not going to solve your problems.
how about you tell us what your problems are?
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Majawala
Stranger
Registered: 06/08/06
Posts: 61
Last seen: 13 years, 2 months
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Re: Stuck and confused [Re: appleorange]
#8034814 - 02/17/08 01:51 PM (15 years, 11 months ago) |
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laziness, boredum, desperation for attention, ptsd from failing out of two different universities and losing the person i thought was the girl i wanted to have babies with, severe anxiety about the future and feelings of helplessness and powerlessness because i can't do anything about it, being too hard on myself, 30 pounds overwieght and bad posture. oh and lack of sex and addiction to porn. and overanylizing everything. and never having to do hard work in the past. now a mom who doesnt want me to leave home because she just got divorced from my dad.
i figure im just gonna start doing a bunch of yoga. the only thing i can think of right now. this stuff isnt too bad compared to other stuff ive seen on here.
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appleorange
Rainbow Technician



Registered: 12/30/07
Posts: 4,868
Loc: Reykjavík
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Re: Stuck and confused [Re: Majawala]
#8034948 - 02/17/08 02:32 PM (15 years, 11 months ago) |
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lol, sounds your like problem can be summed up as nervous wreck.
ayahuasca could actually exaggerate and make all these things worse honestly. too many depressed/fucked up people go on psychedelic trips thinking their problems will be solved, when in fact the exact opposite occurs.
i'll send ya a pm.
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