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Anonymous #1

Sometimes I despise my husband
    #7928662 - 01/25/08 06:35 AM (16 years, 7 days ago)

For the most part he's a good guy. He has a job and can be pretty cool. But then he goes thru stages where he is getting shitfaced drunk all the time.

And I'm talking about spilling beer everywhere, hanging all over everyone, smacking me on the ass HARD 15 or 20 times throughout the night. Then comes the moody "I'm a piece of shit", "You don't love me", "Fuck everyone". Sometimes hitting walls and making holes.

I want to love him but when he gets like this a couple times a week, I can't help but think he's kind of pathetic. Hell he's in his 30's, grow up already. Then I think I'm just being a bitch. I drink, but not like that.

But this shit sucks.


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Anonymous #2

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #7928681 - 01/25/08 06:47 AM (16 years, 7 days ago)

Get a divorce ASAP and move on with your life.
He will always lead you to thinking that things will change with him, but they never will.
And you'll end feeling bad with yourself. Do this as fast as you can and never look back.
I am sorry you have to go through this. :hug:


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Anonymous #3

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #7928688 - 01/25/08 06:51 AM (16 years, 7 days ago)

Fuck that above advice, I was like that until my wife pulled me aside and told me how she felt so I stopped and switched to smoking tons of pot instead which she likes better, though she doesn't smoke she prefers it over drinking, as do i. Tell him how you feel and then if he doesn't change leave him. Hopefully he will get the message.


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Anonymous #4

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #7928694 - 01/25/08 06:53 AM (16 years, 7 days ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
Get a divorce ASAP and move on with your life.
He will always lead you to thinking that things will change with him, but they never will.
And you'll end feeling bad with yourself. Do this as fast as you can and never look back.
I am sorry you have to go through this. :hug:




your an idiot!  have you ever tried to talk to him about this and tell him how you feel and thet its stressing your realationship?  if not why dont you try.  if you really love him and you want to be with him dont just give up on him at the slightest of distress like the poster above recomends.

i was in your husbands same shoes.  im younger but i used to always get sloppy drunk with my buddies and make a fool of myself in front of her and do shit she didnt like.  but i didnt care and i was having fun..  then one day she sat me down and really talked to me and i took it to heart and now i make a very concious effort to not upsset het or offend her when i drink.


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Anonymous #5

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #4]
    #7928755 - 01/25/08 07:27 AM (16 years, 7 days ago)

Sometimes we need a little bit of a mom in our own wives....
i.e. We want and need and want to need to be told to straighten the fuck up sometimes......
Always when sober though.....
And nicely..
Like..
"Sweetie, have you ever considered what you are like when you're drunk?"


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Anonymous #2

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #5]
    #7928784 - 01/25/08 07:44 AM (16 years, 7 days ago)

Quote:

Sometimes we need a little bit of a mom in our own wives....




Yes, immature and weak men do that.
And controlling bitches assume this role. :cool:
People like that deserve each other.


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Anonymous #6

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #7928853 - 01/25/08 08:21 AM (16 years, 7 days ago)

come on love admit you love the ass slaps
i promise ill change and start drinking jd if you dont like the beer spills
just dont give me any filthy looks ALRIGHT BITCH!!
fuck everyone then!

yeah just talk to him when he's sober and maybe set up a hidden cam to show him how he's acting beforehand


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Anonymous #7

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #7928867 - 01/25/08 08:28 AM (16 years, 7 days ago)

What he is doing is not right. You should both stop drinking for a year or two.


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Anonymous #1

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #7]
    #7928970 - 01/25/08 09:09 AM (16 years, 7 days ago)

We have talked about it and talked about it. The problem is when he gets that bad he of course doesn't remember any of it. He thinks I'm over reacting.

He's promised to quit before but has never made it past two weeks.

As far as the ass slaps go, they are ok at first. But man by the end of the night that shit starts to hurt.

And I don't want to be his mama. But you know leaving someone just isn't easy. It would be different if he hit me or something, then I'd know I had to leave.


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Anonymous #6

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #7929014 - 01/25/08 09:22 AM (16 years, 7 days ago)

theres nothing like cold hard reality on cam
record him carrying on and show him what he's doing


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Anonymous #1

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #6]
    #7929039 - 01/25/08 09:31 AM (16 years, 7 days ago)

I had a friend in a similar situation. She tried doing that. Her husband's response was that he thought she had provoked him and then started recording.


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Anonymous #6

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #7929078 - 01/25/08 09:44 AM (16 years, 7 days ago)

when i used to drink i always thought that it was the people around me that decided if i was a happy or bad drunk by their looks, expressions and certain things they might say to me
i always thought i was a happy drunk but in hindsight i was a bigmouthed asshole of a drunk just like your husband
thats why i quit


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Anonymous #8

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #7929106 - 01/25/08 09:58 AM (16 years, 7 days ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
Get a divorce ASAP and move on with your life.
He will always lead you to thinking that things will change with him, but they never will.
And you'll end feeling bad with yourself. Do this as fast as you can and never look back.
I am sorry you have to go through this. :hug:




Lame.

Is that your answer to everything? Give up and move on?

We're talking about a marriage here, not some failed project or something.

:nonono:


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Anonymous #2

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #8]
    #7930311 - 01/25/08 03:10 PM (16 years, 7 days ago)

And WTF is a marriage?
She is obviously unhappy, he is obviously a jerk. Why should SHE stay with him just because they're "married"?
I can't believe how many irrational stuff people believe in. Please tell me exactly what's the difference? A fucking paper? Does this make their relationship more valuable? Or is REAL human connection more valuable? The connection that these two lack of?
She has the right to be happy and I honestly and strongly believe that this situation will only make her unhappy and more depressed about HER OWN person.
Get a divorce girl, nothing in this world deserves the sacrifice you're making. Life is to be enjoyed, and from what it looks to me you can't enjoy it anymore. Plus, this way you'll have the change to find REAL love. :heart:


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Anonymous #9

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #7930348 - 01/25/08 03:19 PM (16 years, 7 days ago)

Hahaha I can't help but think this is a parody to a thread posted earlier this week here.


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Anonymous #5

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #7930381 - 01/25/08 03:26 PM (16 years, 7 days ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
And WTF is a marriage?
She is obviously unhappy, he is obviously a jerk. Why should SHE stay with him just because they're "married"?
I can't believe how many irrational stuff people believe in. Please tell me exactly what's the difference? A fucking paper? Does this make their relationship more valuable? Or is REAL human connection more valuable? The connection that these two lack of?
She has the right to be happy and I honestly and strongly believe that this situation will only make her unhappy and more depressed about HER OWN person.
Get a divorce girl, nothing in this world deserves the sacrifice you're making. Life is to be enjoyed, and from what it looks to me you can't enjoy it anymore. Plus, this way you'll have the change to find REAL love. :heart:




Kids.


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Anonymous #2

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #5]
    #7930389 - 01/25/08 03:29 PM (16 years, 7 days ago)

Kids?
Kids grow up just fine even with their parents divorced. And anyways, they grow up better than with their parents together but unhappy, kids are not stupid, they notice everything and their parent's unhealthy relationship will affect them in a negative way later in life.


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Anonymous #10

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #7930462 - 01/25/08 03:42 PM (16 years, 7 days ago)

I'd suggest telling him that you can't live with that sort of behavior anymore. Do so in such a way as to not come off like an ultimatum if at all possible, just let him know that you can't take much more and that you aren't happy with it. Express as clearly as possible that you love and care for him, and don't want things to end over something as meaningless as a few too many drinks a bit too often. Everyone's human, I'm sure you wouldn't mind if it weren't such a regular event.

Be willing to help him seek alternative ways to deal with whatever it is that causes him to do this.


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Anonymous #11

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #7930611 - 01/25/08 04:11 PM (16 years, 7 days ago)

Quote:

Grizz said:
For the most part he's a good guy. He has a job and can be pretty cool. But then he goes thru stages where he is getting shitfaced drunk all the time.

And I'm talking about spilling beer everywhere, hanging all over everyone, smacking me on the ass HARD 15 or 20 times throughout the night. Then comes the moody "I'm a piece of shit", "You don't love me", "Fuck everyone". Sometimes hitting walls and making holes.

I want to love him but when he gets like this a couple times a week, I can't help but think he's kind of pathetic. Hell he's in his 30's, grow up already. Then I think I'm just being a bitch. I drink, but not like that.

But this shit sucks.




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Anonymous #12

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #11]
    #7930941 - 01/25/08 05:09 PM (16 years, 7 days ago)

:shocked:


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Anonymous #8

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #7931135 - 01/25/08 05:41 PM (16 years, 7 days ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
And WTF is a marriage?
She is obviously unhappy, he is obviously a jerk. Why should SHE stay with him just because they're "married"?




A marriage is a commitment between two consenting adults. I'm not saying she has to stay with him, but don't you think she should at least TRY to address the situation before ending it?


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Anonymous #7

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #8]
    #7931284 - 01/25/08 06:11 PM (16 years, 7 days ago)

She should tape him, confront him with it while sober and issue an ultimatum. When he doesnt change leave, and live with a family member for a few months. Then she will give him a second chance, and the process can start over again until somebody dies or they get a divorce.


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Anonymous #5

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #7]
    #7933539 - 01/26/08 02:29 AM (16 years, 6 days ago)

Viewing your situation from outside the box, I think that it's imperative that you immediatley dry smash his shit box.


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Anonymous #6

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #5]
    #7933558 - 01/26/08 02:36 AM (16 years, 6 days ago)

boxhead


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Anonymous #13

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #5]
    #7933591 - 01/26/08 02:49 AM (16 years, 6 days ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
Viewing your situation from outside the box, I think that it's imperative that you immediatley dry smash his shit box.



QFT


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Anonymous #14

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #6]
    #7933594 - 01/26/08 02:51 AM (16 years, 6 days ago)

Ill take over for him


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Anonymous #15

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #7933623 - 01/26/08 03:08 AM (16 years, 6 days ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
And WTF is a marriage?
She is obviously unhappy, he is obviously a jerk. Why should SHE stay with him just because they're "married"?
I can't believe how many irrational stuff people believe in. Please tell me exactly what's the difference? A fucking paper? Does this make their relationship more valuable? Or is REAL human connection more valuable? The connection that these two lack of?
She has the right to be happy and I honestly and strongly believe that this situation will only make her unhappy and more depressed about HER OWN person.
Get a divorce girl, nothing in this world deserves the sacrifice you're making. Life is to be enjoyed, and from what it looks to me you can't enjoy it anymore. Plus, this way you'll have the change to find REAL love. :heart:




You are a Fucking Idiot.


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Anonymous #16

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #12]
    #7933627 - 01/26/08 03:09 AM (16 years, 6 days ago)

find a real man and stop bitching about it.


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Anonymous #17

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #7933629 - 01/26/08 03:10 AM (16 years, 6 days ago)

damnit woman, you don't love me!!!
:faded:


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Anonymous #2

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #15]
    #7933860 - 01/26/08 07:34 AM (16 years, 6 days ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
Quote:

Anonymous said:
And WTF is a marriage?
She is obviously unhappy, he is obviously a jerk. Why should SHE stay with him just because they're "married"?
I can't believe how many irrational stuff people believe in. Please tell me exactly what's the difference? A fucking paper? Does this make their relationship more valuable? Or is REAL human connection more valuable? The connection that these two lack of?
She has the right to be happy and I honestly and strongly believe that this situation will only make her unhappy and more depressed about HER OWN person.
Get a divorce girl, nothing in this world deserves the sacrifice you're making. Life is to be enjoyed, and from what it looks to me you can't enjoy it anymore. Plus, this way you'll have the change to find REAL love. :heart:




You are a Fucking Idiot.




Ahhh you're just an ass who's afraid that his wife/future wife will do the same with you when she'll realize what kind of a loser you are :smirk:


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Anonymous #1

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #7934192 - 01/26/08 10:01 AM (16 years, 6 days ago)

Well everyone has been making me smile at least.

But like I said earlier the situation has been addressed, more than once. Unfortunately you can't make someone quit drinking.

To be honest I don't know if there's much hope here. My problem is I agree with both sides of this debate.


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Anonymous #2

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #7934244 - 01/26/08 10:20 AM (16 years, 6 days ago)

True.
And you are responsible ONLY for your happiness.
Pursue it. :heart:


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Anonymous #18

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #3]
    #7934461 - 01/26/08 11:16 AM (16 years, 6 days ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
Fuck that above advice, I was like that until my wife pulled me aside and told me how she felt so I stopped and switched to smoking tons of pot instead which she likes better, though she doesn't smoke she prefers it over drinking, as do i. Tell him how you feel and then if he doesn't change leave him. Hopefully he will get the message.




Every single women out there has this anxiety. Its about telling people things. Its really odd. I don't quite understand it, but apparently women are unable to tell people things that can be hurtful to ones ego.


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Anonymous #2

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #18]
    #7934788 - 01/26/08 12:31 PM (16 years, 6 days ago)

Quote:

Every single women out there has this anxiety. Its about telling people things. Its really odd. I don't quite understand it, but apparently women are unable to tell people things that can be hurtful to ones ego.




And you know this how? :hehehe:
I am a woman and I have no problem with telling things that might hurt one's ego. It is true that for a very long while I felt VERY uncomfortable doing that, but then I realized that the only way to feel good about life is to become honest and look for honesty.
What I DON'T like to do is impost my will on others, especially on my partner. :shrug:


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Anonymous #13

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #7934989 - 01/26/08 01:07 PM (16 years, 6 days ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
What I DON'T like to do is impost my will on others, especially on my partner. :shrug:



that's not always a bad thing ya know  :naughty:


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Anonymous #19

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #13]
    #7935003 - 01/26/08 01:10 PM (16 years, 6 days ago)

"For Entertainment purposes only. If rash or irritation occurs, discontinue use."


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Anonymous #2

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #13]
    #7935017 - 01/26/08 01:11 PM (16 years, 6 days ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
Quote:

Anonymous said:
What I DON'T like to do is impost my will on others, especially on my partner. :shrug:



that's not always a bad thing ya know  :naughty:




I never referred to sex, case in which you're ABSOLUTELY right :hehehe:


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Anonymous #19

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #7935039 - 01/26/08 01:14 PM (16 years, 6 days ago)

Sheesh, FWG & MT, don't you two ever get tired of flirting?  :lol:


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Anonymous #2

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #19]
    #7935069 - 01/26/08 01:19 PM (16 years, 6 days ago)

No :smirk:


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Anonymous #8

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #7936251 - 01/26/08 05:25 PM (16 years, 6 days ago)

I do. FWG just won't quit :sad:


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Anonymous #20

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #7943939 - 01/28/08 04:29 AM (16 years, 4 days ago)

Quote:

Probably OP said:
My problem is I agree with both sides of this debate.




Then it's time to look at things from a third side.

Next time he gets drunk toss him the car keys and tell him you need something from the mall. Repeat until he gets arrested for DUI/crashes into a school bus. When he's in jail drain the bank accounts, get a sex change, and move to Vegas in whatever order you like. You'll thank me when you're giving $5 handjobs to support your meth addiction.

No seriously, I'd leave if he doesn't calm his ass down. A girl can only take so much, and I'll treat you right baby :naughty:


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Anonymous #21

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #11]
    #7951037 - 01/29/08 03:57 PM (16 years, 3 days ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
Quote:

Grizz said:
For the most part he's a good guy. He has a job and can be pretty cool. But then he goes thru stages where he is getting shitfaced drunk all the time.

And I'm talking about spilling beer everywhere, hanging all over everyone, smacking me on the ass HARD 15 or 20 times throughout the night. Then comes the moody "I'm a piece of shit", "You don't love me", "Fuck everyone". Sometimes hitting walls and making holes.

I want to love him but when he gets like this a couple times a week, I can't help but think he's kind of pathetic. Hell he's in his 30's, grow up already. Then I think I'm just being a bitch. I drink, but not like that.

But this shit sucks.







1. That is totally not my posting style and anyone with half a brain knows that.

2. You fucked up with your last sentence - I don't drink.


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Anonymous #1

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #21]
    #7951236 - 01/29/08 04:34 PM (16 years, 3 days ago)

Hey!  This wasn't a joke post and I'm not trying to pretend to be Grizz. - OP

And to the one who posted before that thank you but no thank you.  Why would I want to be with someone who sees me as a $5 meth addicted hooker?  :razz:


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Anonymous #20

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #7951432 - 01/29/08 05:10 PM (16 years, 3 days ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
And to the one who posted before that thank you but no thank you.  Why would I want to be with someone who sees me as a $5 meth addicted hooker?  :razz:




Because those are my favorite kind of hooker?


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Anonymous #1

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #20]
    #7952209 - 01/29/08 07:36 PM (16 years, 3 days ago)

cheapskate!


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Anonymous #15

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #7954133 - 01/30/08 12:41 AM (16 years, 2 days ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
Quote:

Anonymous said:
Quote:

Anonymous said:
And WTF is a marriage?
She is obviously unhappy, he is obviously a jerk. Why should SHE stay with him just because they're "married"?
I can't believe how many irrational stuff people believe in. Please tell me exactly what's the difference? A fucking paper? Does this make their relationship more valuable? Or is REAL human connection more valuable? The connection that these two lack of?
She has the right to be happy and I honestly and strongly believe that this situation will only make her unhappy and more depressed about HER OWN person.
Get a divorce girl, nothing in this world deserves the sacrifice you're making. Life is to be enjoyed, and from what it looks to me you can't enjoy it anymore. Plus, this way you'll have the change to find REAL love. :heart:




You are a Fucking Idiot.




Ahhh you're just an ass who's afraid that his wife/future wife will do the same with you when she'll realize what kind of a loser you are :smirk:




If she's stayed for a decade already, I must be doing something right.

Did some asshole dry smash your shitbox and forget to call you back? That would explain the bitterness.


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Anonymous #22

Re: Sometimes I despise my husband [Re: Anonymous #12]
    #7954154 - 01/30/08 12:47 AM (16 years, 2 days ago)

hahahahahahahaha


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