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Offlinewearejellyfish
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not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD
    #7893383 - 01/17/08 03:06 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

so whenever i trip around my boyfriend. i feel completely awkward and don't want him to initiate any kind of move on me.
and then i start thinking too much about our relationship.
if we are somewhere public, where there are a lot of couples, i'm comparing our public relationship to theirs, from what i see. (not out loud, but to myself, and i keep thinking how weird our relationship is)

but this only happens when i trip.
i just think too much.

but when i'm tripping and i'm surrounded by more friends than just my boyfriend, i'm totally happy and enjoying everything.

anyone else feel like this?

i was hoping we could have sex on acid, but i just wouldn't be able to do it.. seems like people really enjoy sex on acid too. so wtf?

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OfflineCaribou_Lou
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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: wearejellyfish]
    #7893398 - 01/17/08 03:10 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

You should have sex on acid, I'm sure that would change your mind

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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: Caribou_Lou]
    #7893407 - 01/17/08 03:13 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

You "just think too much"? No such thing. It seems to me that your problem is not thinking enough while not on acid.


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Offlinewearejellyfish
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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: Phonerothyme]
    #7893420 - 01/17/08 03:19 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Phonerothyme said:
You "just think too much"? No such thing. It seems to me that your problem is not thinking enough while not on acid.




honestly, i think way too much sober.
which is why when i'm high, i absolutely hate it because my mind won't shut the fuck up and i can't distract myself from going down in that black hole of pessimistic thoughts.

everyone always tells me that i think too much, if i note on something that might happen or has happened..and i'm constantly worrying about things that have not even happened yet.

all this causes me anxiety.

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Offlinewearejellyfish
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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: Caribou_Lou]
    #7893425 - 01/17/08 03:20 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Caribou_Lou said:
You should have sex on acid, I'm sure that would change your mind




everything feels so ugly .
maybe i'm not tripping hard enough.

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Offlinexeallos
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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: wearejellyfish]
    #7893460 - 01/17/08 03:26 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

I don't mean to imply anything by relating my experiences, they are simply what they are.

My SO was molested by a teenage boy when she was around 8, she wasn't raped but it really fucked with her in terms of sexual development. We had been together about 5 years before we ever dropped LSD together, both mid 20's by this time.

This is well into the trip and we are laying in bed, just fully clothed and hanging out relaxing when she says she doesn't feel too good physically. So I am kind of giggly and just fucking around and I jump over to the other side of the bed and get on top of her to try and tickle her a little bit and cheer her up.

I looked in her eyes and she was like a deer in headlights, I have never seen her look so fucking scared! So I move over, she proceeds to shove me out of the way, stand up, sprint for the bathroom and throw up for the next fifteen minutes. She said she had some flashback to being molested, and she has never felt like that since it happened, it didn't have anything to do "with me", even though it was because I jumped on her... so it was just pretty fucked up all around, for what it's worth.

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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: wearejellyfish]
    #7893478 - 01/17/08 03:31 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

On mushrooms I don't want anyone or thing touching me. Only when I'm able hold it with one hand like a cigarette.

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OfflineCaribou_Lou
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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: wearejellyfish]
    #7893505 - 01/17/08 03:36 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

wearejellyfish said:
Quote:

Caribou_Lou said:
You should have sex on acid, I'm sure that would change your mind




everything feels so ugly .
maybe i'm not tripping hard enough.




Hmm I don't really have any advice.. How much do you usually dose? Try to take a little less maybe, do you feel the same way on shrooms?

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Offlinewearejellyfish
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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: xeallos]
    #7893642 - 01/17/08 04:02 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

xeallos said:
I don't mean to imply anything by relating my experiences, they are simply what they are.





i was sexually harassed a bit four years ago when i was really stoned.
i hardly think about it anymore, thank god. but it always makes me sick when something reminds me of it.

but he never seems to want to be touchy either. and maybe that is why. i always notice that he seems very distant, and those vibes are so strong and i think i pick up on them and keep space from him because of that. i think if he was touchy, i would like that and want to be touchy too. but he seems like he's the one that keeps us uncomfortable together when we trip

Quote:

Caribou_Lou said:
Quote:

wearejellyfish said:
Quote:

Caribou_Lou said:
You should have sex on acid, I'm sure that would change your mind




everything feels so ugly .
maybe i'm not tripping hard enough.




Hmm I don't really have any advice.. How much do you usually dose? Try to take a little less maybe, do you feel the same way on shrooms?




well a few nights ago i dosed the least i've ever dosed. but it was enough to feel weird, and i got a lot of anxiety when we went out in public. which he doesn't like when i get like that, but it's hard not to. so i just don't let him know, and he usually doesn't notice unless i say something..
i didn't like being on such a low dose.
i either wanted to trip or be sober. i didn't like just feeling weird and anxious.

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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: wearejellyfish]
    #7893738 - 01/17/08 04:17 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

wearejellyfish said:
Quote:

Phonerothyme said:
You "just think too much"? No such thing. It seems to me that your problem is not thinking enough while not on acid.




honestly, i think way too much sober.
which is why when i'm high, i absolutely hate it because my mind won't shut the fuck up and i can't distract myself from going down in that black hole of pessimistic thoughts.

everyone always tells me that i think too much, if i note on something that might happen or has happened..and i'm constantly worrying about things that have not even happened yet.

all this causes me anxiety.



me and you have alot in common. after continued use of psychedelcs i know over think every aspect of my life sober or high, the more high i get on acid, shrooms, weed ect. the more i overanalize everything. i tend to everytime i enjoy something i think of every reason why until i get into evolutionary reasons, and sometimes that can get depressing realizing how trivial your life really is. but fuck enjoy it its the only one you have. (that you know of)


dont worry about things that may happen nothing is in your control you may die at any second on any day, worrying is just going to make the time you spend alive that much worse. worry about that. lol

get used to it, think of it as a gift and dont get caught up on one specific area of something, learn from it and move on.


Edited by awesomebastard (01/17/08 04:23 PM)

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Offlinewearejellyfish
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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: awesomebastard]
    #7893758 - 01/17/08 04:21 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

i never think of things optimistically though.
i'm always asking myself, 'what if' which is ridiculous, and i need to get over that.

i'll sit in a fucking classroom and not pay attention because i'm thinking about anything and everything else, or wondering about kids in the class or something.
i can't pay attention to the things i NEED to pay attention to.

yes.. overanalzing. that's it.
and i do it way too often.
the only time i don't mind is it when i'm sleeping.

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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: wearejellyfish]
    #7893804 - 01/17/08 04:28 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

wearejellyfish said:
i never think of things optimistically though.
i'm always asking myself, 'what if' which is ridiculous, and i need to get over that.

i'll sit in a fucking classroom and not pay attention because i'm thinking about anything and everything else, or wondering about kids in the class or something.
i can't pay attention to the things i NEED to pay attention to.

yes.. overanalzing. that's it.
and i do it way too often.
the only time i don't mind is it when i'm sleeping.




hey, you sound exactly like me about 3 years ago most of my anxiety stopped after an ego shattering trip i had. dont worry about things that may happen nothing is in your control you may die at any second on any day, worrying is just going to make the time you spend alive that much worse.

and just remember bad things are not all bad. without the bad things in life we could not apreciate the wonderfull things . do you get my drift.


--------------------
"Absolute certainty is a privilege of uneducated minds and fanatics." ~ C.J. Keyser



Mr. Cypher said: "I just tell the girls how sexy I am and their panties melt."

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Offlinewearejellyfish
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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: awesomebastard]
    #7893820 - 01/17/08 04:31 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

that makes total sense.

i am hoping for something to happen to quit all this anxiety.
how did it stop after the ego shattering trip?

sometimes i wonder if i should trip my face off enough to have one of those.. just because i know it will HAVE to change me.

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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: wearejellyfish]
    #7893849 - 01/17/08 04:36 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

wearejellyfish said:
Quote:

Caribou_Lou said:
You should have sex on acid, I'm sure that would change your mind




everything feels so ugly .
maybe i'm not tripping hard enough.





candyflip!!!!!


--------------------

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Offlinewearejellyfish
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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: sui]
    #7893862 - 01/17/08 04:38 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

if i knew where to get some mdma!! i would do it in a heartbeat

but i'm still waiting to find some pure, so he will do it with me

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OfflineMushroomTrip
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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: wearejellyfish]
    #7893871 - 01/17/08 04:40 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

but he never seems to want to be touchy either. and maybe that is why. i always notice that he seems very distant, and those vibes are so strong and i think i pick up on them and keep space from him because of that. i think if he was touchy, i would like that and want to be touchy too. but he seems like he's the one that keeps us uncomfortable together when we trip




Well, analyze your relationship, see what it means to you and what HE means to you.
How much of him do you feel close to you and how much of him is distant?
Psychedelic experiences are overwhelming by their nature and IMO a deeper connection must be felt, sex while tripping is not just sex, it's something way deeper and meaningful.
Maybe the reason why you don't like to be touched by him is because you need that kind of connection?
Things that you should definitely think about.

Quote:

i'll sit in a fucking classroom and not pay attention because i'm thinking about anything and everything else, or wondering about kids in the class or something.
i can't pay attention to the things i NEED to pay attention to.




I've learned that when you try to force yourself into anything, no constructive results happen. :shrug:
Instead of making yourself pay attention to what you NEED to pay attention to, start asking yourself WHY do you feel that you NEED (as in an obligation).
Maybe you don't like the classes that you take, maybe it's not what appeals to you, so then why do it anyways? Why taking classes that don't interest you?
Or... it could be because you feel generally anxious, and then you need to keep digging in your mind (without being judgmental to your past) and find out what keeps bugging you.


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All this time I've loved you
And never known your face
All this time I've missed you
And searched this human race
Here is true peace
Here my heart knows calm
Safe in your soul
Bathed in your sighs

:bunnyhug: :yinyang2:

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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: wearejellyfish]
    #7893885 - 01/17/08 04:42 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

you can change withought ego shattering trips they are just a shortcut for some people. if you really want a life changing experience do some ayahausca or smoke some DMT. and just let go

by the way dont take your boyfriend not wanting to play grab ass while tripping personally. I completly lose all of my sex drive while tripping.


--------------------
"Absolute certainty is a privilege of uneducated minds and fanatics." ~ C.J. Keyser



Mr. Cypher said: "I just tell the girls how sexy I am and their panties melt."

Edited by awesomebastard (01/17/08 04:45 PM)

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Offlinewearejellyfish
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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: MushroomTrip]
    #7893899 - 01/17/08 04:46 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

i was going to take this term off. and work full time, and then go back spring term. but finding a job wasn't as easy, since i'm so avoidant.
and i ended up kinda being forced into taking classes again (by my dad who threatened to stop helping me out financially) and signed up the weekend before classes started.

i have a few 2 hour classes and 2 one hour classes. one hour classes i seem to get by pretty well, though still, concentrating is hard.. two hour classes. i can't even pay attention for a half hour, but i think knowing that i have to be there for two hours makes it that hard.
sometimes i find things interesting that they are teaching, but i just hate the lecture/projection thing.
i need hands on things
and that's why i was going to wait until spring to take classes again because there's no real field work during winter, cause it's too fucking cold..

i was diagnosed with add (isnt everyone?) before. but i think it's just anxiety.

but what you said has helped, and i will think about those things more, thanks.

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Offlinewearejellyfish
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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: awesomebastard]
    #7893906 - 01/17/08 04:48 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

awesomebastard said:
you can change withought ego shattering trips they are just a shortcut for some people. if you really want a life changing experience do some ayahausca or smoke some DMT. and just let go

by the way dont take your boyfriend not wanting to play grab ass while tripping personally. I completly lose all of my sex drive while tripping.





good to know. thanks.
wonder where i can find some ayahausca or dmt around here..

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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: wearejellyfish]
    #7893907 - 01/17/08 04:49 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

im not sure what your anxious about. is it what other people think of you or something like that?
you can ordr the ingredients for aya and dmt online mimosa hostilis and syrian rue look em up.

Edited by awesomebastard (01/17/08 04:50 PM)

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Offlinewearejellyfish
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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: awesomebastard]
    #7893915 - 01/17/08 04:51 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

not really. which is weird.
but i've gotten over that part.
i don't even know what i'm anxious about.
i just always feel socially awkward.

see. i think if i KNEW what i was always anxious about, i could fix it. i think i should start writing down things while i'm feeling that way so i can look back at them later . since right now, i'm not anxious at all since i'm sitting in my room by myself on the computer. and i can't think back on why i was anxious today or any other day, but just know that i was

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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: wearejellyfish]
    #7893941 - 01/17/08 04:57 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

the way i used to manually deal with anxiety before that fatefull trip, and it worked just as well its just slower if you can find out what your anxious about force yourself to face it. say your anxious about the way you look, go to school dressed like shit, no makeup and such. funny but it works after a while you stop giving a fuck.lol


--------------------
"Absolute certainty is a privilege of uneducated minds and fanatics." ~ C.J. Keyser



Mr. Cypher said: "I just tell the girls how sexy I am and their panties melt."

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OfflineMushroomTrip
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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: wearejellyfish]
    #7893950 - 01/17/08 04:59 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

The reason why your mind is over thinking is to keep you away from your real problems in my opinion.
Don't let yourself be fooled by them, as what your mind brings to surface are just superficial matters, not the essence of your anxiety. Though they can be important pointers to what's really bothering you,
Use them as your allies, don't get sucked in this game.
Quieting your mind will make your real fears pop up and this is where you must take action.


--------------------
:bunny::bunnyhug:
All this time I've loved you
And never known your face
All this time I've missed you
And searched this human race
Here is true peace
Here my heart knows calm
Safe in your soul
Bathed in your sighs

:bunnyhug: :yinyang2:

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Offlinewearejellyfish
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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: awesomebastard]
    #7893960 - 01/17/08 05:01 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

awesomebastard said:
the way i used to manually deal with anxiety before that fatefull trip, and it worked just as well its just slower if you can find out what your anxious about force yourself to face it. say your anxious about the way you look, go to school dressed like shit, no makeup and such. funny but it works after a while you stop giving a fuck.lol




i stopped wearing makeup when my best friend died almost two years ago.
a lot of the times i go to school with my hair looking like shit because i didn't feel like doing anything about it, so i just put a hood up. so i don't really think that's one of my anxious issues

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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: wearejellyfish]
    #7893967 - 01/17/08 05:04 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

oh i wasnt implying anything its just and example but read mushroom trips post below mine it will probably be more helpfull.


--------------------
"Absolute certainty is a privilege of uneducated minds and fanatics." ~ C.J. Keyser



Mr. Cypher said: "I just tell the girls how sexy I am and their panties melt."

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Invisibleawesomebastard
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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: awesomebastard]
    #7893982 - 01/17/08 05:07 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

if you really examine yourself you could pull thoughts apart and find out where they originate. i do this under the influence when high or tripping, drugs are a great tool if you know how to use them.


--------------------
"Absolute certainty is a privilege of uneducated minds and fanatics." ~ C.J. Keyser



Mr. Cypher said: "I just tell the girls how sexy I am and their panties melt."

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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: awesomebastard]
    #7894088 - 01/17/08 05:41 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

I remember when we were younger my wife and I had some tabs of Ex, and some acid hits. And we escaped Mardi-gras to go to Florida to beach and we took it all and decided to fuck. But then we kept seeing each other as animals. Bears and wolf heads and stuff. She wasn't digging it. She didn't do drugs. Ever. She was trying to impress me. So anyway, I knew better than stop playing around. So I ate her out really good and it was like saying hello to God. It was like the sky crashed. So next time give it a chance.


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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: eve69]
    #7895056 - 01/17/08 09:33 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

hmm... In your first post you said that you don't want him to initiate any moves on you. But then later you said that you feel like he doesn't want to be touchy.

So do you not want to be touchy, or is it because you feel like he doesn't?

Sorry if I missed something, but im in a hurry and skimmed the later parts but heres my opinion...

I say talk to him about it while you are sober. Theres no reason not to. Ask him if he doesn't want to be touched and ask why if he doesn't.

It could be that he feels that you don't want to be touched so he distances himself like that.

Do you guys ever hug or kiss while tripping? If you haven't ever I suggest just holding hands then hugging or a kiss on the cheek to break the ice. For me , any touch like that, the small things are amazing. It's an amazing connection.

Are you afraid of how you might feel? If you both feel uncomfortable with it you could try it just once, and if you still feel that way then it's just the way you two are I guess. But I say its worth a try, and too beautiful of an experience not to at least try.

I hope everything works out! Talk to him about it!

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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: awesomebastard]
    #7895083 - 01/17/08 09:39 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

Your on a drug, neither of you are all there.

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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: wearejellyfish]
    #7895111 - 01/17/08 09:47 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

some suggestions from public display are wonderful reminders, but beyond that most public intimacy is pretty indelicate.
i find public acts of intimacy a kind of contradiction or a form of performance, or psychodrama.

acid is best with delicacy.
intimacy too


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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: wearejellyfish]
    #7895296 - 01/17/08 10:26 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

Some people just have anxiety, that's what makes it so shitty.. there's no reason for it. I'm one of those people, unfortunately. You can either learn to live with it, or let it fuck you for the rest of your life. It's totally irrational and I know it, but there's no medicine that will cure it and it will always be there whether I like it or not.

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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: redgreenvines]
    #7895305 - 01/17/08 10:29 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

redgreenvines said:
some suggestions from public display are wonderful reminders, but beyond that most public intimacy is pretty indelicate.
i find public acts of intimacy a kind of contradiction or a form of performance, or psychodrama.

acid is best with delicacy.
intimacy too




that's interesting..

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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: Caribou_Lou]
    #7898894 - 01/18/08 07:44 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Caribou_Lou said:
Some people just have anxiety, that's what makes it so shitty.. there's no reason for it. I'm one of those people, unfortunately. You can either learn to live with it, or let it fuck you for the rest of your life. It's totally irrational and I know it, but there's no medicine that will cure it and it will always be there whether I like it or not.




yeah.
i'm trying to learn to overcome it, but it's hard.
i've come a long ways though in the past years.. but it's still interfering with a lot of things

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Offlineb0b gnarley
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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: wearejellyfish]
    #7898931 - 01/18/08 07:54 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

Try rolling.:yesnod:


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Offlinedoitagain
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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: wearejellyfish]
    #7898996 - 01/18/08 08:14 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

I could be wrong but it almost sounds like you're afraid to given to the trip fully around your boyfriend, and that's where the anxiety type thinking comes from.

Next time your tripping try and just accept all sides of yourself, and your relationship with your boyfriend. Forget about all your earthly attachments and just exist. Going into a trip with that kind of frame of mind, might be beneficial.


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now i hear the police comin after me

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Offlinewearejellyfish
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Re: not wanting to be touched while tripping on LSD [Re: doitagain]
    #7899035 - 01/18/08 08:24 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

b0b gnarley said:
Try rolling.:yesnod:



if i could find some from someone i trusted. i'd totally fucking do it..


Quote:

doitagain said:
I could be wrong but it almost sounds like you're afraid to given to the trip fully around your boyfriend, and that's where the anxiety type thinking comes from.

Next time your tripping try and just accept all sides of yourself, and your relationship with your boyfriend. Forget about all your earthly attachments and just exist. Going into a trip with that kind of frame of mind, might be beneficial.




that sounds like it would be verrrry beneficial. thank you :]

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