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Offlinerobbyberto
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Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms
    #7878271 - 01/14/08 01:04 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

http://209.85.165.104/search?q=cache:http%3A//www.fstdt.com/fundies/top100.aspx%3Farchive%3D1
These quotes are awesome. Here is a taste:

"No, everyone is born Christian. Only later in life do people choose to stray from Jesus and worship satan instead. Atheists have the greatest "cover" of all, they insist they believe in no god yet most polls done and the latest research indicates that they are actually a different sect of Muslims."

"he Fact the Earth is Flat is not my opinion, it is a Proved Fact! While all we need to know is that the Bible says the Earth is flat (Is.40:22, Ez.7:2, Dn.2:35; 4:10-11,20, Mt.4:8)... but for a second can you imagine what these so-called 'scientists would have us believe --- If the earth really was round, that would mean there arre people who are HANGING DOWN, HEAD DOWNWARDS while we are standing head up? But since the theory allows to travel to those parts of the earth where the people are said to hand head downward, and still to fancy ourselves to be heads upwards, and our friends whom we have left behind us to be heads downwards! LOL! What foolishness! TheWHOLE THING IS A MYTH - A DREAM - A DELUSION - and a snare, and, instead of there being any evidence at all in this direction to substantiate this popular theory, it is plain proof that the Earth is Not A Globe! "

By some miracle I have avoided contact with these types of people, but do you have any stories about your run-ins with fundamentalist Christians? Maybe a crazy guy on campus or something.


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“People say having kids is life changing, well that doesn’t necessarily mean a good thing, does it? I could take one of my legs off. That would change my life.” -Karl Pilkington



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OfflineMadtowntripper
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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: robbyberto]
    #7878286 - 01/14/08 01:07 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

These folks are all over.

I love the people outside my neighborhood porn shop that have their elementary school age kids hold up huge sandwhich boards with pictures of aborted fetuses that says pornography is bad.

Yeah, sorry, but that can't be healthy for kids.

And there is the really creepy guy at school who hangs out in the stairwell of the student union handing out candy that says "Jesus Loves You". Now, I don't mind the message, but this guy is dirty and says "Hey, want some candy?" to everyone who walks by. I used to think he was some sexual deviant or something until I saw his candy that someone had taken and dropped.

All kinds of weird birds out there.


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After one comes, through contact with it's administrators, no longer to cherish greatly the law as a remedy in abuses, then the bottle becomes a sovereign means of direct action.  If you cannot throw it at least you can always drink out of it.  - Ernest Hemingway

If it is life that you feel you are missing I can tell you where to find it.  In the law courts, in business, in government.  There is nothing occurring in the streets. Nothing but a dumbshow composed of the helpless and the impotent.    -Cormac MacCarthy

He who learns must suffer. And even in our sleep pain that cannot forget falls drop by drop upon the heart, and in our own despair, against our will, comes wisdom to us by the awful grace of God.  - Aeschylus


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OfflineCannabischarlie
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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Madtowntripper]
    #7878363 - 01/14/08 01:31 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Um, they claim the earth is flat?

That is just retarded.


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This section of the signature line has been intentionally left blank.

  we could all use a little more sunshine.

:shrug: yeah, she's funny and somewhat interesting.  not a beauty queen, but not bad lookin.  i'd feel quite honored to fuck janine garofalo.
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Offlinefreddurgan
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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Madtowntripper]
    #7878364 - 01/14/08 01:31 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

rofl???

PEOPEL HANGING UPSIDE DOWN OMGZ GRAVITY ISNT REAL


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Ron Paul 2008!
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OfflineThe_Ghost
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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: freddurgan]
    #7878369 - 01/14/08 01:32 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Damn these people must miss the middle ages.


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/ / / / / / / LISTEN TO MY MUSIC: E X E D / / / / / / /
The universe gives no fucks. And takes no fucks.
May His Circuits Ever Function


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InvisibleEternalCowabunga
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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: The_Ghost]
    #7878378 - 01/14/08 01:35 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

AETHIESTS ARE SECRET MUZLIMMS!!!  :scream:


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OfflineEssen
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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Madtowntripper]
    #7878382 - 01/14/08 01:37 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

That is perhaps the greatest website to ever be created, ever. I can't believe some of the shit that these people say...


Quote:

Gravity: Doesn't exist. If items of mass had any impact of others, then mountains should have people orbiting them. Or the space shuttle in space should have the astronauts orbiting it. Of course, that's just the tip of the gravity myth. Think about it. Scientists want us to believe that the sun has a gravitation pull strong enough to keep a planet like neptune or pluto in orbit, but then it's not strong enough to keep the moon in orbit? Why is that? What I believe is going on here is this: These objects in space have yet to receive mans touch, and thus have no sin to weigh them down. This isn't the case for earth, where we see the impact of transfered sin to material objects. The more sin, the heavier something is.




:rofl:  :foreheadslap:


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Offlinelearningtofly
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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Essen]
    #7878389 - 01/14/08 01:39 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

Just recently my son Bobby came out to me. I had been worried for awhile. His teachers said most of his grades were slipping and he seemed depressed and withdrawn.

Bobby said he'd been hiding it for awhile because he was afraid I would reject him. I sat him down and told him that I loved him and that God loved him, but that his salvation was in danger if he did not resist his unnatural tempations. I told him how being gay would mean he would live a shorter life, and that if he couldnt change his orientation he could be celibate like most the ex-gays are. He started crying saying something along the lines of "I knew you wouldnt understand! You're just like everyone else!" before running to his room and slamming the door.

What did I do wrong? I dont want to lose my son, but I fear I already have. I talked it over with his therapist, who had the ludicrous idea that homosexuality was unchangable and that trying to repress could lead to lots of psychological damage (I've dropped him and will try to be finding another therapist with more moral beliefs). I wouldnt be surprised if he's the one who's feeding my son all the homosexual propaganda about how its 'ok' to be gay. That, or how homosexuality has engulfed the media, making it seem 'cool' and 'hip' and how they were just another oppressed minority. You didnt have to worry about seeing two men making out on tv at my age! I dont want to sound like a fanatic, but Im worried what other effects will come out of this increasingly secular, immoral society obsessed with filth.

Am I too late? Or is it possible to save my son





Fuck this guy, srsly fuck this guy


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Edited by learningtofly (01/14/08 01:41 PM)


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Invisiblemaggotz


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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Madtowntripper]
    #7878401 - 01/14/08 01:42 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

i don't have a neighborhood porn shop. :sad:


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Offlinelearningtofly
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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: maggotz]
    #7878406 - 01/14/08 01:43 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

the essence of faggotry. its funny how they embody what they hate.


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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: learningtofly]
    #7878409 - 01/14/08 01:44 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

i think that kid killed himself.


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OfflineCaribou_Lou
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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: maggotz]
    #7878424 - 01/14/08 01:49 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Christian fanatics are just as bad as suicide bombers. Twisted, bizarre mother fuckers.

haha I just read this one:

This is what it would be like, if the majority of people were athiests.
ATHIEST KID: Mom, I'm going to go fuck a hooker.
ATHIEST MOM: Okay, son.
ATHIEST KID: Afterwards, I'm going to go smoke pot with my friends, since it's "not addictive."
ATHIEST MOM: Okay, come home soon!


Edited by Caribou_Lou (01/14/08 01:50 PM)


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OfflineThe_Ghost
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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: learningtofly]
    #7878435 - 01/14/08 01:50 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

learningtofly said:
Quote:

Just recently my son Bobby came out to me. I had been worried for awhile. His teachers said most of his grades were slipping and he seemed depressed and withdrawn.

Bobby said he'd been hiding it for awhile because he was afraid I would reject him. I sat him down and told him that I loved him and that God loved him, but that his salvation was in danger if he did not resist his unnatural tempations. I told him how being gay would mean he would live a shorter life, and that if he couldnt change his orientation he could be celibate like most the ex-gays are. He started crying saying something along the lines of "I knew you wouldnt understand! You're just like everyone else!" before running to his room and slamming the door.

What did I do wrong? I dont want to lose my son, but I fear I already have. I talked it over with his therapist, who had the ludicrous idea that homosexuality was unchangable and that trying to repress could lead to lots of psychological damage (I've dropped him and will try to be finding another therapist with more moral beliefs). I wouldnt be surprised if he's the one who's feeding my son all the homosexual propaganda about how its 'ok' to be gay. That, or how homosexuality has engulfed the media, making it seem 'cool' and 'hip' and how they were just another oppressed minority. You didnt have to worry about seeing two men making out on tv at my age! I dont want to sound like a fanatic, but Im worried what other effects will come out of this increasingly secular, immoral society obsessed with filth.

Am I too late? Or is it possible to save my son





Hank Hill??


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The universe gives no fucks. And takes no fucks.
May His Circuits Ever Function


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OfflineThe_Ghost
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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Caribou_Lou]
    #7878450 - 01/14/08 01:54 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

Caribou_Lou said:
Christian fanatics are just as bad as suicide bombers. Twisted, bizarre mother fuckers.

haha I just read this one:

This is what it would be like, if the majority of people were athiests.
ATHIEST KID: Mom, I'm going to go fuck a hooker.
ATHIEST MOM: Okay, son.
ATHIEST KID: Afterwards, I'm going to go smoke pot with my friends, since it's "not addictive."
ATHIEST MOM: Okay, come home soon!



"
The athiest kid leaves the room. The father comes home from work several minutes later.

ATHIEST DAD: Hey!
ATHIEST MOM: Hi, honey! I'm pregnant again. I guess I'll just get another abortion, since "fetuses don't count as human life."
ATHIEST DAD: Okay, get as many abortions as you want!
ATHIEST MOM: Oh, and don't go in the bedroom.
ATHIEST DAD: Why not?
ATHIEST MOM: There are two gay men fucking eachother in there.
ATHIEST DAD: Why are they here?
ATHIEST MOM: I wanted to watch them do it for awhile. They just aren't finished yet.
ATHIEST DAD: Okay, that's fine with me!

Suddenly, their neighbor runs into the house.

ATHIEST NEIGHBOR: Come quick, there's a Christian outside!
ATHIEST MOM: We'll be right there!

The athiest couple quickly put on a pair of black robes and hoods. They then exit the house, and run into the street, where a Christian is nailed to a large, wooden X. He is being burned alive. A crowd of athiests stand around him, all wearing black robes and hoods.

RANDOM ATHIEST: Damn you, Christian! We hate you! We claim to be tolerant of all religions. But we really hate your's! That's because we athiests are hypocritical like that! Die, Christian!

THE END

Scary, isn't it?"


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May His Circuits Ever Function


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OfflineEssen
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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: The_Ghost]
    #7878456 - 01/14/08 01:55 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

As far as I am concerned if an answer to a question isn't in the bible, then the you have no business asking the question. A few years ago when my wife suddenly had to get an emergency c-section I was scared. But I didnt turn to any book about quarks. Luckily I had my palm pilot with me, which just happened to have the entire King James bible on it! I read a few passages that gave me the strength to pray for her and the baby to get through this ordeal. I sure didn't need any useless trivia books about quarks to find comfort in.




I though this was kind of ironic.


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InvisibleAlteredAgain
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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: robbyberto]
    #7878462 - 01/14/08 01:56 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

There are a lot of things I have concluded to be wrong, without studying them in-depth. Evolution is one of them. The fact that I don't know that much about it does not bother me in the least.




:what: :shocked: :lol: :hypno:


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OfflineThe_Ghost
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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: AlteredAgain]
    #7878463 - 01/14/08 01:57 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

AlteredAgain said:
Quote:

There are a lot of things I have concluded to be wrong, without studying them in-depth. Evolution is one of them. The fact that I don't know that much about it does not bother me in the least.




:what: :shocked: :lol: :hypno:



Hahaha. I was just going to post that one.


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/ / / / / / / LISTEN TO MY MUSIC: E X E D / / / / / / /
The universe gives no fucks. And takes no fucks.
May His Circuits Ever Function


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Offlinelearningtofly
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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: The_Ghost]
    #7878471 - 01/14/08 01:59 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

factz r the work of the devil! anything that is diffrent frum wut i think is satanz work!

wuts my proof? if u think differenly then ur obvioisly the work of the devil


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InvisibleAlteredAgain
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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: learningtofly]
    #7878474 - 01/14/08 01:59 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

anyone who believes in the devil, is the devil! :evil:


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OfflineThe_Ghost
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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Caribou_Lou]
    #7878484 - 01/14/08 02:01 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

Caribou_Lou said:
Christian fanatics are just as bad as suicide bombers.



Suicide bombing is an act. I mean a whole range of people could be one. These people are just fucking stupid tho.

"Several million years for a monkey to turn into a man. oh wait thats right. monkeys don't live several million years."


--------------------
/ / / / / / / LISTEN TO MY MUSIC: E X E D / / / / / / /
The universe gives no fucks. And takes no fucks.
May His Circuits Ever Function


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Offlinetrepanib
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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: The_Ghost]
    #7878489 - 01/14/08 02:02 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

These people make me lose faith in humanity.


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OfflineEssen
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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: AlteredAgain]
    #7878492 - 01/14/08 02:03 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:


[Talking about an eleven year old girl who was raped and then buried alive]

god was sacrificing this child as a way to show others the light. much as he did his own child. what a beautiful gift he has given us.




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OfflineThe_Ghost
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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Essen]
    #7878511 - 01/14/08 02:07 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Srsly they were born in the wrong time. They'd feel right at home burning people at the stake in the 14th century.


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The universe gives no fucks. And takes no fucks.
May His Circuits Ever Function


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OfflineGastronomicus
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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: The_Ghost]
    #7878577 - 01/14/08 02:24 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

Deoxyribonucleic Acid, for example... sounds impressive, right? But have you ever seen what happens if you put something in acid? It dissolves! If we had all this acid in our cells, we'd all dissolve! So much for the Theory of Evolution, Check MATE!




hahahhaha, that one made me giggle. Some just make me angry though. What ignorant back-water savages


--------------------
Make my Funk the P Funk, I wants to get Funked up

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OfflineCaribou_Lou
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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: The_Ghost]
    #7878611 - 01/14/08 02:35 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

The_Ghost said:
Quote:

Caribou_Lou said:
Christian fanatics are just as bad as suicide bombers.



Suicide bombing is an act. I mean a whole range of people could be one. These people are just fucking stupid tho.

"Several million years for a monkey to turn into a man. oh wait thats right. monkeys don't live several million years."




I was referring to crazy ass muslims, religious fanatics are all the same.


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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Caribou_Lou]
    #7878614 - 01/14/08 02:36 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Where can I find these chat rooms? This seems to be a good plan for the afternoon


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Make my Funk the P Funk, I wants to get Funked up

LAGM2024


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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: robbyberto]
    #7878619 - 01/14/08 02:39 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)



Thanks some of those were really funnny


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Invisiblemycopsycho
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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Caribou_Lou]
    #7878635 - 01/14/08 02:45 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

for the record i would just like to say, i hate christians. and this BS is the reason why. lets all be intolerant and ignorant of everything around us and teach our kids to be stupid dicks just like us!


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I Am The Sickness.

Diploid: I think adults have a right to make stupid decisions and it's nobody else's fucking business.


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Offlinerobbyberto
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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: mycopsycho]
    #7878655 - 01/14/08 02:51 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

mycopsycho said:
for the record i would just like to say, i hate christians. and this BS is the reason why. lets all be intolerant and ignorant of everything around us and teach our kids to be stupid dicks just like us!



That's some pretty serious hypocrisy. Just read that and let it sink in.


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“People say having kids is life changing, well that doesn’t necessarily mean a good thing, does it? I could take one of my legs off. That would change my life.” -Karl Pilkington



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Offlineanonymous123
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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: mycopsycho]
    #7878657 - 01/14/08 02:51 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

A woman wants to abort a rape child? She should have thought of that before she walked down that dark alley without a male prescence, not to mention she should have thought before putting on revealing attire.

[Yes. It should (be legal). Otherwise you're screwing over the women who don't deserve their fate.]

Are you calling them victims now? Should've stayed in the house where it's safe.




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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: mycopsycho]
    #7878658 - 01/14/08 02:52 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

damnit..... after 22 years i finally find out im really a muslim???

well, i guess i should hold true to who i really am. wheres my backpack full of c-4?


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OfflineChubba
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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: LeftyBurnz]
    #7878667 - 01/14/08 02:55 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

As far as I am concerned if an answer to a question isn't in the bible, then the you have no business asking the question. A few years ago when my wife suddenly had to get an emergency c-section I was scared. But I didnt turn to any book about quarks. Luckily I had my palm pilot with me, which just happened to have the entire King James bible on it! I read a few passages that gave me the strength to pray for her and the baby to get through this ordeal. I sure didn't need any useless trivia books about quarks to find comfort in.




Did anyone point out to this guy that modern medicine and surgery is based on the principles of science? Without extensive research into chemistry, biology and physics his wife would have died because there would be no such thing as a "c-section".

Also palm pilot without science? lol? Did they find the blueprints on how to build a handheld computer in the bible?

What the fuck.


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Invisiblemycopsycho
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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: robbyberto]
    #7878673 - 01/14/08 02:57 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

robbyberto said:
Quote:

mycopsycho said:
for the record i would just like to say, i hate christians. and this BS is the reason why. lets all be intolerant and ignorant of everything around us and teach our kids to be stupid dicks just like us!



That's some pretty serious hypocrisy. Just read that and let it sink in.




are you christian or simply just retarded?


--------------------
I Am The Sickness.

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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: robbyberto]
    #7878680 - 01/14/08 02:58 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

haha, no shit.


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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Chubba]
    #7878682 - 01/14/08 02:59 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

theyre a bunch of idiots. i used to get off to arguing with them and making them look stupid. but i cant even enjoy that anymore. its just too ridiculous anymore. i refuse to talk to anyone like these people. and when they confront me in public, i just act crazy. especially those fucking jehovas. :cuckoo:


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: robbyberto]
    #7878686 - 01/14/08 02:59 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

I want to ask you all to NOT mess with these people's website. If you do I'm going to delete the thread and hand out bans for the responsible.

Observe them in their natural habitat and if you'd like, discuss it here. But no messing with their website OK?

Sure its all fun and games but we mods get to ban their wrath-puppets and the admins will get complaint after complaint.


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Offlinerobbyberto
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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: mycopsycho]
    #7878689 - 01/14/08 03:00 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Seriously, kill yourself if you cannot understand what I just said.
Quote:


for the record i would just like to say, i hate christians.




You're not intolerant and ignorant?
Quote:


lets all be intolerant and ignorant of everything around us and teach our kids to be stupid dicks just like us!




You're mocking Christians for being intolerant and ignorant after what you just posted?


--------------------
“People say having kids is life changing, well that doesn’t necessarily mean a good thing, does it? I could take one of my legs off. That would change my life.” -Karl Pilkington



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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Asante]
    #7878699 - 01/14/08 03:02 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

Wiccan_Seeker said:
we mods get to ban their wrath-puppets and the admins will get complaint after complaint.




:lol:


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OfflineDeathCompany
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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Asante]
    #7878700 - 01/14/08 03:02 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Its not an actual forum, its just a compilation of some really stupid things chirstiains have said.


--------------------


Edited by DeathCompany (01/14/08 03:03 PM)


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: robbyberto]
    #7878704 - 01/14/08 03:03 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

My favorite one :rofl:

Quote:

Apes are just creatures twisted by Satan to mock Jesus by giving EVILolition credibility. Further more they are naturally lust crazed for human women. Since they are not natural creatures they should be exterminated forthwith as the tools of evil they are.




--------------------
Those who danced were thought to be quite insane by those who could not hear the music.



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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: robbyberto]
    #7878709 - 01/14/08 03:04 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

robbyberto said:
Seriously, kill yourself if you cannot understand what I just said.
Quote:


for the record i would just like to say, i hate christians.




You're not intolerant and ignorant?
Quote:


lets all be intolerant and ignorant of everything around us and teach our kids to be stupid dicks just like us!








radical christians.... such as those posting on that website.. are the only people i am intolerant of. well, fuckers like you too but everyone else is cool. get off my dick you over-presumptuous ass.


--------------------
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Diploid: I think adults have a right to make stupid decisions and it's nobody else's fucking business.


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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: mycopsycho]
    #7878730 - 01/14/08 03:10 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Being intolerant of them is just as bad as them being intolerant of you. I am sorry I pointed out your blatant hypocrisy, everyone noticed how stupid your post was anyways. I'll add some random periods to make you feel better. ...
...
...
Fucking learn how to use a comma.


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: LeftyBurnz]
    #7878738 - 01/14/08 03:12 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

We seriously don't want a group of people getting a message from God that they must smite our pool of sin with suck.


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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: robbyberto]
    #7878743 - 01/14/08 03:15 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

robbyberto said:
Fucking learn how to use a comma. 



commas are of the devil!  :snub:


--------------------


:craven:  Ravings of a Madman  :craven:


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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: LeftyBurnz]
    #7878747 - 01/14/08 03:15 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Don't be dumb. He's not saying that all Muslims are suicide bombers or that christians are muslims or that they're running around with bombs. He's just saying that fanatical Muslims and fanatical Christians both have skewed perspectives on reality and are crazy enough to use any means necessary to force their views with no regard for other's livelihood.


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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: robbyberto]
    #7878748 - 01/14/08 03:16 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

robbyberto said:
Being intolerant of them is just as bad as them being intolerant of you. I am sorry I pointed out your blatant hypocrisy, everyone noticed how stupid your post was anyways. I'll add some random periods to make you feel better. ...
...
...
Fucking learn how to use a comma. 




glad to see your correcting the little things... lets me know im under your skin... :smirk:


--------------------
I Am The Sickness.

Diploid: I think adults have a right to make stupid decisions and it's nobody else's fucking business.


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InvisiblePoC
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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: robbyberto]
    #7878750 - 01/14/08 03:16 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

AMAZING  :cryariver:

[about a girl being born with mental disabilities]

This girl is like a leper so what she needs to do is try and find god

if she really believes she can be healed from this state, she will be healed from this state

Most afflictions like this are caused by sins committed while still inside the womb. If she can repent for what she does god will embrace her and make her as human as you or me but if she chooses not to she'll always be like this

god tests every one of us [emphasis added]


--------------------


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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: mycopsycho]
    #7878767 - 01/14/08 03:22 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

We can kiss and make up now. You're still wrong. Live and let live, don't concern yourself with the beliefs of others unless they force them on to you. I just posted that link because those people are clearly retarded and deserve to mocked mercilessly.


--------------------
“People say having kids is life changing, well that doesn’t necessarily mean a good thing, does it? I could take one of my legs off. That would change my life.” -Karl Pilkington



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InvisibleCowgold
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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Asante]
    #7878770 - 01/14/08 03:23 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Wiccan??? How does being a presumptious ass compare with being an ambiguous fascist?


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Asante]
    #7878778 - 01/14/08 03:25 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

Wiccan_Seeker said:
We seriously don't want a group of people getting a message from God that they must smite our pool of sin with suck.




speak for yourself, I want some serious suck along with my sin


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Cowgold]
    #7878806 - 01/14/08 03:31 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

Cowgold said:
Wiccan??? How does being a presumptious ass compare with being an ambiguous fascist?




:lol:

I like W_S alot more than I used to, but I used to call him a fascist all the time, and I still think he has a bit of a dictatorial bent.

Funny stuff.


--------------------
After one comes, through contact with it's administrators, no longer to cherish greatly the law as a remedy in abuses, then the bottle becomes a sovereign means of direct action.  If you cannot throw it at least you can always drink out of it.  - Ernest Hemingway

If it is life that you feel you are missing I can tell you where to find it.  In the law courts, in business, in government.  There is nothing occurring in the streets. Nothing but a dumbshow composed of the helpless and the impotent.    -Cormac MacCarthy

He who learns must suffer. And even in our sleep pain that cannot forget falls drop by drop upon the heart, and in our own despair, against our will, comes wisdom to us by the awful grace of God.  - Aeschylus


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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: mycopsycho]
    #7878822 - 01/14/08 03:36 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

note: entropy is the tendancy towards a more complex disorderly arrangment.

Quote:

One of the most basic laws in the universe is the Second Law of Thermodynamics. This states that as time goes by, entropy in an environment will increase. Evolution argues differently against a law that is accepted EVERYWHERE BY EVERYONE. Evolution says that we started out simple, and over time became more complex. That just isn't possible: UNLESS there is a giant outside source of energy supplying the Earth with huge amounts of energy. If there were such a source, scientists would certainly know about it.




Fuck me. Fundamentalist / evangelical Christian's are the epitome of hatred / intolerance / ignorance.

It actually makes me sad that there people in this world (and more specifically on the fucking INTERNET?!!? how the fuck can they disclaim science on the fucking internet?) that actually are this ignorant.

I would do my best to educate these people if I knew it wasn't an impossible task. Faith, when applied to fundamentalists, seems to equate to ignorance.


--------------------
"I only ever hope to reach equilibrium, in Nature's matrix, in line with the meridian" ~ Jehst

:sun: "...and I know that I have to keep breathing, as tomorrow the sun will rise, who knows what the tide will bring?" :sun:

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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Prisoner#1]
    #7878823 - 01/14/08 03:36 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

Wiccan??? How does being a presumptious ass compare with being an ambiguous fascist?





Explain?


Quote:

speak for yourself, I want some serious suck along with my sin




What I meant to say was that we don't want a small army of fundies swooping down on the shroomery and messing with it in any way they can.


Fundies are fundies, be they Christian or Muslim. Christians fundamentalists blow up abortion clinics too, if America was a militarized areas with unexploded ordinance lying about everywhere, you'd have a huge situation with christian fundamentalist bombers as well.


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InvisibleCowgold
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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Asante]
    #7878848 - 01/14/08 03:41 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

Wiccan_Seeker said:
Quote:

Wiccan??? How does being a presumptuous ass compare with being an ambiguous fascist?





Explain?




Just wondering if the line on flames moves day to day or if calling someone an ambiguous fascist is a worse flame than calling someone an over-presumptuous ass.

I'm trying to gauge, by the examples of others, where the line is on bans.

Also... Christians say dumb shit all the time.


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Cowgold]
    #7878871 - 01/14/08 03:47 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

I'm not exactly on the ball as I've slept 2-4 hours a night for about a week because of influenza and my lungs filling up with fluid when I lie down.

If you think someone somewhere flamed, use the notify-a-mod button :smile:

There's a fine line between letting flames fly and killing debate. If I missed something another mod more awake and less flu-dazed than I will pick up on it :smile:


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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Cepheus]
    #7878874 - 01/14/08 03:47 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

Cepheus said:
note: entropy is the tendancy towards a more complex disorderly arrangment.

Quote:

One of the most basic laws in the universe is the Second Law of Thermodynamics. This states that as time goes by, entropy in an environment will increase. Evolution argues differently against a law that is accepted EVERYWHERE BY EVERYONE. Evolution says that we started out simple, and over time became more complex. That just isn't possible: UNLESS there is a giant outside source of energy supplying the Earth with huge amounts of energy. If there were such a source, scientists would certainly know about it.




Haha, that quote was my signature for a few months... that's one of my favorite quotes from that site.
Fuck me. Fundamentalist / evangelical Christian's are the epitome of hatred / intolerance / ignorance.

It actually makes me sad that there people in this world (and more specifically on the fucking INTERNET?!!? how the fuck can they disclaim science on the fucking internet?) that actually are this ignorant.

I would do my best to educate these people if I knew it wasn't an impossible task. Faith, when applied to fundamentalists, seems to equate to ignorance.




--------------------
I'm in need of a sterile sporeprint, if anyone wants to do a trade for some seeds or something, or maybe just for free if you have a lot of them............. i'd really appreciate it :mushroom2:

NuggetPorch said - "YES! YES!!!! Coaster its Faint, but its fucking there YOU see it!!! Perhaps we are both on some sort of unusual wave length associated with unusual neuro-transmitters, mind expansion white light, or something we can not even begin to understand or fathom to conceive because it is a gift of insight or a curse given to us by powers beyond our control, something we are not meant to know."


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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Cepheus]
    #7878876 - 01/14/08 03:48 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

UNLESS there is a giant outside source of energy supplying the Earth with huge amounts of energy. If there were such a source, scientists would certainly know about it.



i will say the same thing i said when i read that a few months ago.

i think that qualifies as a giant source of energy.


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InvisibleCowgold
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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Asante]
    #7878886 - 01/14/08 03:49 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

I don't like the notify mod button.  I was just being a smart ass.  Thanks for the answer.  :wink:  I'll mind my own business now.  (why do I feel like a hall monitor now?)  :nonono:


To stay on subject...

I was reading a psychology magazine last night about the internal conflicts that pastors experience when their personal beliefs don't jive with the public persona they're expected to portray.  A loss of faith if you will.  Their loss of faith and the denial of fanatical christians seems to me to be results of behavior.  The latter rarely seek answers. 



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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Cowgold]
    #7878895 - 01/14/08 03:51 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

"I am a bit troubled. I believe my son has a girlfriend, because she left a dirty magazine with men in it under his bed."
:rotfl:


--------------------
I'm in need of a sterile sporeprint, if anyone wants to do a trade for some seeds or something, or maybe just for free if you have a lot of them............. i'd really appreciate it :mushroom2:

NuggetPorch said - "YES! YES!!!! Coaster its Faint, but its fucking there YOU see it!!! Perhaps we are both on some sort of unusual wave length associated with unusual neuro-transmitters, mind expansion white light, or something we can not even begin to understand or fathom to conceive because it is a gift of insight or a curse given to us by powers beyond our control, something we are not meant to know."


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Invisiblemycopsycho
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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Siekoaktiv]
    #7878946 - 01/14/08 03:58 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

Siekoaktiv said:
"I am a bit troubled. I believe my son has a girlfriend, because she left a dirty magazine with men in it under his bed."
:rotfl:




sounds to me like her son has a boyfriend, not a girlfriend lol


--------------------
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Diploid: I think adults have a right to make stupid decisions and it's nobody else's fucking business.


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Asante]
    #7878962 - 01/14/08 04:02 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

Wiccan_Seeker said:
Fundies are fundies, be they Christian or Muslim.





why is it we never hear about shinto suiside bombings?

I love you man... get well soon and get better


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Prisoner#1]
    #7878985 - 01/14/08 04:06 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:


(About mental retardation)

Most afflictions like this are caused by sins committed while still inside the womb.




We have a winner.


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: RandalFlagg]
    #7879005 - 01/14/08 04:09 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

I can sum it all up in three words: Evolution is a lie




apparently, counting is the work of the devil also.


--------------------
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  Edited by yageman (04/20/06 4:20 PM) 


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: RandalFlagg]
    #7879053 - 01/14/08 04:21 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

RandalFlagg said:
Quote:


(About mental retardation)

Most afflictions like this are caused by sins committed while still inside the womb.




We have a winner.





Wo0T!

did you know retards usually know they're retarded while stupid people rarely ever figure it out


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InvisibleAsante
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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: RandalFlagg]
    #7879183 - 01/14/08 04:49 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

Most afflictions like this are caused by sins committed while still inside the womb.





Funny how it took a Christian fundamentalist point of view for me to have my first mental image of a foetus masturbating in the womb.
Sins committed in the womb, wow.

I'm religious myself, but I believe that God is responsible for everything, and we for our own actions. With my God responsible for both Woodstock as Auschwitz, it isn't all love I feel for my deity, certainly not to the point of blaming the victim because "my God won't do such a thing" which Christians often do. Personally this kind of belief is like being a fair-weather friend of your God, only there for the nice things and refusing to accept the abysmal ugliness of what the Lord sometimes dishes out. God is EVERYTHING, not just the nice things. If you can't accept that, you're seeing just one side of him/her, and not the big picture.



Prisoner: thanks, I'm getting better. I think it was a violent influenza combined with copious fireworks fumes of new years eve that made it come down on my lungs so bad.


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: RipVanWinkle]
    #7879316 - 01/14/08 05:12 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

RipVanWinkle said:
My favorite one :rofl:

Quote:

Apes are just creatures twisted by Satan to mock Jesus by giving EVILolition credibility. Further more they are naturally lust crazed for human women. Since they are not natural creatures they should be exterminated forthwith as the tools of evil they are.







wow. just wow.


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: robbyberto]
    #7879325 - 01/14/08 05:14 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

If you call yourself a person of God and refuse to help arrest faggots, you belie yourself and prove you do not belong to the God who is committed to burning faggots.

If you refuse to help arrest faggots, you really should expect to be left behind when God comes to collect His people.




:rofl2:  :rotfl: :dielaughing: :rofl:

Seriously though I'm off to help arrest some faggots


--------------------
Welcome evermore to gods and men is the self-helping man.  For him all doors are flung wide: him all tongues greet, all honors crown, all eyes follow with desire.  Our love goes out to him and embraces him, because he did not need it.

~ R.W. Emerson, "Self-Reliance"

:heartpump:


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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Cowgold]
    #7879343 - 01/14/08 05:18 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

Cowgold said:
Don't be dumb. He's not saying that all Muslims are suicide bombers or that christians are muslims or that they're running around with bombs. He's just saying that fanatical Muslims and fanatical Christians both have skewed perspectives on reality and are crazy enough to use any means necessary to force their views with no regard for other's livelihood.




i was making a mockery of how many of the fundies feel about muslims.


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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: LeftyBurnz]
    #7879345 - 01/14/08 05:19 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)



--------------------
Welcome evermore to gods and men is the self-helping man.  For him all doors are flung wide: him all tongues greet, all honors crown, all eyes follow with desire.  Our love goes out to him and embraces him, because he did not need it.

~ R.W. Emerson, "Self-Reliance"

:heartpump:


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InvisibleCowgold
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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: LeftyBurnz]
    #7879430 - 01/14/08 05:39 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Oh.  :dumbhunter:


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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Cowgold]
    #7879435 - 01/14/08 05:40 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

Cowgold said:
Oh.  :dumbhunter:




sorry, i always tend to forget that sarcasm isnt easily noticed on the interwebs.


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Asante]
    #7879471 - 01/14/08 05:46 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

Wiccan_Seeker said:
I think it was a violent influenza combined with copious fireworks fumes




sometimes I dont have enough sense to stay out of the weather either


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: WhiskeyClone]
    #7879542 - 01/14/08 06:03 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

:lol:


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: maggotz]
    #7879571 - 01/14/08 06:08 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

A missionary I knew watched a bullet headed for him do a RIGHT ANGLE before it got to him.

MartyrInTraining, FulfilledProphecy.com [Comments (83)] [2007-Jan-08]





where the hell can i buy this gun??


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: LeftyBurnz]
    #7879647 - 01/14/08 06:23 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

A couple of my favorites:
Quote:

You are banned. You are not a Christian, for Christians don't accuse brothers and sisters in Christ of being non-Christian.



Quote:

To say the Bible was written by men and may contain inaccuracies completely contradicts the word of the Bible.




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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Asante]
    #7879650 - 01/14/08 06:24 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

foetus's do masturbate in the womb, for the record.


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: LeftyBurnz]
    #7879692 - 01/14/08 06:32 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

leftysurprise said:
Quote:

A missionary I knew watched a bullet headed for him do a RIGHT ANGLE before it got to him.
MartyrInTraining, FulfilledProphecy.com [Comments (83)] [2007-Jan-08]



where the hell can i buy this gun??





http://www.cornershot.com/


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Prisoner#1]
    #7879720 - 01/14/08 06:35 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

Prisoner#1 said:
Quote:

leftysurprise said:
Quote:

A missionary I knew watched a bullet headed for him do a RIGHT ANGLE before it got to him.
MartyrInTraining, FulfilledProphecy.com [Comments (83)] [2007-Jan-08]



where the hell can i buy this gun??






http://www.cornershot.com/


:nonono: NONONO! i want the gun that shoots a bullet that can make a right turn in mid flight!


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: LeftyBurnz]
    #7879760 - 01/14/08 06:41 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

I often debate with evolutionists because I believe that they are narrow mindedly and dogmatically accepting evolution without questioning it. I don't really care how God did what He did. I know He did it.




This to me is almost 100% proof that this site is a joke, that these are not real christian quotes, and that as funny as it is it aint from a real christian forum.

People that stupid wouldn't know how to turn on a computer.


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: g00ru]
    #7879786 - 01/14/08 06:46 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

guruu said:
Quote:

I often debate with evolutionists because I believe that they are narrow mindedly and dogmatically accepting evolution without questioning it. I don't really care how God did what He did. I know He did it.




This to me is almost 100% proof that this site is a joke, that these are not real christian quotes, and that as funny as it is it aint from a real christian forum.

People that stupid wouldn't know how to turn on a computer.




that quote can be found in the first post of this topic.

here

oh its real my friend. what i cant believe is that these people are alive.


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Offlineg00ru
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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: LeftyBurnz]
    #7879843 - 01/14/08 06:56 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

I just read the whole thread.


THEY TALK ABOUT LSD!!!!!!

:lsd:


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: g00ru]
    #7879891 - 01/14/08 07:05 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Uwheeeeehehehe these are too funny.
God gave us brains to use... these people forgot that, I guess.


--------------------
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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: LeftyBurnz]
    #7880565 - 01/14/08 09:35 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

leftysurprise said:
Quote:

Prisoner#1 said:
Quote:

leftysurprise said:
Quote:

A missionary I knew watched a bullet headed for him do a RIGHT ANGLE before it got to him.
MartyrInTraining, FulfilledProphecy.com [Comments (83)] [2007-Jan-08]



where the hell can i buy this gun??






http://www.cornershot.com/


:nonono: NONONO! i want the gun that shoots a bullet that can make a right turn in mid flight!




Oswald had one.


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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: The_Ghost]
    #7880859 - 01/14/08 10:43 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Behead those who insult Christianity!


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: robbyberto]
    #7880933 - 01/14/08 10:57 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

My favorite:

"I can sum it all up in three words: Evolution is a lie". :lol:


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Le_Canard]
    #7880990 - 01/14/08 11:08 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

Next I bet you're gonna tell me air has mass???


LOL.


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Edited by learningtofly (01/14/08 11:08 PM)


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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: The_Ghost]
    #7881075 - 01/14/08 11:24 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Wow christans are dumber then I thought.....
One guy said evolution couldn't be plausable with out a huge sorce of energy supplying the earth and if there was one scientists would know about it.

Um....0the sun?
Haha


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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Cubie]
    #7881210 - 01/14/08 11:55 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Quote:

Slavery is Biblical, but is it moral?


Wow if you even have to ask whether or not slavery is moral.....


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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: learningtofly]
    #7881230 - 01/14/08 11:59 PM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Do I even have to ask if you know what a rhetorical question is?


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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Cowgold]
    #7881249 - 01/15/08 12:05 AM (16 years, 18 days ago)

Lmao cowgold. Forreal


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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: robbyberto]
    #7881261 - 01/15/08 12:08 AM (16 years, 18 days ago)

I don't like religion or science.  :razz:  I'm I alone on this? :frown:


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: robbyberto]
    #7881743 - 01/15/08 04:17 AM (16 years, 17 days ago)
Log in to view attachment

One thing must be said about Fundamentalist Christianity: it inspired many a good Metal song :rockon:


Carnivore - Angry Neurotic Catholics

I'm suffering from depression
The anger turned within
What do I gain for all my pain
Perhaps a seat in heaven?

Chuck it out!

Don't do what you want
Do what you're taught is right
Your life is built on paranoia and guilt
Don't forget your valium tonight

The agony I must endure
My mind is painful and swells
The punishment for what I've done
Is forever the pains of Hell
How come what is natural
Has to be a sin?
Why would God give me this urge
If I cannot give in?
They say don't give up
That Jesus loves me
But there are some things he doesn't forgive
I know I have sinned
And am there fare worthless
And I don't deserve to live

I went down to my basement
Confused and depressed
Put Black Sabbath on
Razor blade in hand
A Wilkinson I think
Ten slashes in each arm
My only wrong doing
Was being born human
And following my instincts
I never was happy
I never was sane
So I shall be extinct
At last I am pure
Witness my sanguinous penance
I don't need anyone
My souls been set free
Death is total independence

Stand up straight
Stomach in
Shoulders back
Sound off
Angry neurotic catholics
It's a sin
Angry neurotic catholics
It's a sin


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Asante]
    #7881749 - 01/15/08 04:26 AM (16 years, 17 days ago)

Those are good lyrics


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Cubie]
    #7882182 - 01/15/08 08:34 AM (16 years, 17 days ago)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Children_of_God#Loving_Jesus
Totally unrelated but still awesome.


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: g00ru]
    #7883742 - 01/15/08 02:40 PM (16 years, 17 days ago)

I am a bit troubled. I believe my son has a girlfriend, because she left a dirty magazine with men in it under his bed. My son is only 16 and I really don't think he's ready to date yet. What's worse is that he's sneaking some girl to his room behind my back. I need help, God! I want my son to stop being so secretive!

for the win :headbang:


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Oracle Of Delphi]
    #7883744 - 01/15/08 02:40 PM (16 years, 17 days ago)

Quote:

Oracle Of Delphi said:
I am a bit troubled. I believe my son has a girlfriend, because she left a dirty magazine with men in it under his bed. My son is only 16 and I really don't think he's ready to date yet. What's worse is that he's sneaking some girl to his room behind my back. I need help, God! I want my son to stop being so secretive!

for the win :headbang:




AHahaha


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Welcome evermore to gods and men is the self-helping man.  For him all doors are flung wide: him all tongues greet, all honors crown, all eyes follow with desire.  Our love goes out to him and embraces him, because he did not need it.

~ R.W. Emerson, "Self-Reliance"

:heartpump:


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: WhiskeyClone]
    #7883807 - 01/15/08 02:52 PM (16 years, 17 days ago)

That was already posted I think


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: LeftyBurnz]
    #10858061 - 08/14/09 07:20 AM (14 years, 5 months ago)

I know this is a massive bump, but, in that posts, I found this, it makes my blood boil!

On The Nature
There is nothing beautiful about nature; to think that there is anything lovely about it is only delusion. The lilies of the field gorge themselves on the remains of death and decay. All that move on the earth directly or indirectly feast on each other with no pity or concern. Even the rainbow is a constant reminder that God once wiped life from the face of the earth, and He will do it again, and next time, He will leave NOTHING behind but an Earth scorched clean by the fires of his wrath.

Secondly, all undomesticated animals should receive our best efforts to eradicate them. The large predators and herbivores serve us no purpose and are an obstacle at best and a threat at worst. To think of them as attractive or to consider them worthy of any pity or consideration should earn the person the same scorn and derision that those with any sense give PETA and Greenpeace. Also, the extinction of any wild animal should result in celebration; one less species for the Greenies to rally around. Seriously, meat from the domesticated cow or pig serves us as well as meat from a deer.

^^^ You can just go :2girls1cup:  :2girls1cup:  :2girls1cup:  :mattz:  :mattz:  :mattz:  :sheeplove:  :sheeplove:  :sheeplove:  :bendoverrover:  :bendoverrover:  :bendoverrover:  :bendoverrover:  :bendoverrover:


I would say suck my dick but I wouldn't allow you to come within a 1000 km of me.

You and your kind should be made extinct before you destroy the whole damn world!


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OfflineThe Centre
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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: marz13]
    #10858089 - 08/14/09 07:35 AM (14 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

marz13 said:
I don't like religion or science.  :razz:  I'm I alone on this? :frown:




no you are not. I like they way science is supposed to be. (Unbaised, quick to change opinion according to facts, always looking for the truth, and weeding out bullshit. What happened to that? They are all baised, and 95% won't change there opinion all to easily. I mean, Terrences theories wasn't even considered, but today, with the knowledge that we have now, his theories are pretty much proven, with the exception of being able to spew out soul and the like. I'd elaborate but that will take way to long and nobody is going to read the entire post anyway.)

I believe in God, nothing can stray me from that, I mean, what idiot will think this is all just chance?! But I do believe religion is a ton of bullshit. I also believe that science found God long ago, but didn't recognize it as such. I am still trying to figure out weather it is DNA, Light, or the whole damn universe. (I'm leaning towards whole damn universe, it fits the description of God at it's best. Light comes close second. DNA is just there because it is found that changes in DNA in one spot, can be seen in the same DNA 100's of miles away (they quite testing after a while) with no delay what so ever. It is beyond space and time...) Science also proved Chi, they call it electricity, magnetism, gravity and the like. (Which all are the same thing in different forms IMO.)


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Invisibledr_gonz

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. [Re: The Centre]
    #10858154 - 08/14/09 08:07 AM (14 years, 5 months ago)

.


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: dr_gonz]
    #10858166 - 08/14/09 08:17 AM (14 years, 5 months ago)

wrath puppet = lol


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: robbyberto]
    #10858170 - 08/14/09 08:19 AM (14 years, 5 months ago)

This thread brought me though an emotional roller coaster:
I laughed
I cried
I profusely masturbated.

All in all, this thread shall serve as a great reminder to humanity that religion makes men do funny t'ings.


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Apollyphelion]
    #10858192 - 08/14/09 08:30 AM (14 years, 5 months ago)

I hardly even remember making this thread. It was a pretty weak post that bumped it, too.


--------------------
“People say having kids is life changing, well that doesn’t necessarily mean a good thing, does it? I could take one of my legs off. That would change my life.” -Karl Pilkington



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OfflineThe Centre
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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: robbyberto]
    #10858355 - 08/14/09 09:44 AM (14 years, 5 months ago)

Hey^ Lol.

But still, MMMMMMWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


My christian parents where THIS close to pushing my WAY off the edge, and getting me to kill them, and then kill myself. (I had such fantasies...)

Long story short, I was always inclined towards the occult and spiritualism. Now, my steph father had a "Heart Attack" and died (He was resuscitated.) and my mother and steph father blamed me for sending demons to them and bewitching them late at night. (They found out that I meditated and did psionics in the early morning hours. I did so since they didn't allow me to meditate, even less do psionics. Aswel they didn't allow me to ride my skateboard in the street, play video games, or basically do anything, and since I was homeschooled, I spent my days aimlessly walking up and down the house, trying to think of something to do... Basically going insane.) They banished me from there house and sent me to my grandparents.

I HATE FANATICAL CHRISTIANS!!


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Invisibledr_gonz

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. [Re: The Centre]
    #10858371 - 08/14/09 09:50 AM (14 years, 5 months ago)

.


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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Cannabischarlie]
    #10858414 - 08/14/09 10:08 AM (14 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Cannabischarlie said:
Um, they claim the earth is flat?

That is just retarded.




If someone told me this in real life I would kill them. I would tell the cops to charge me with animal cruelty, because no intelligent human being could possibly say such a stupid thing.


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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Rocker232]
    #10858449 - 08/14/09 10:19 AM (14 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Rocker232 said:
Quote:

Cannabischarlie said:
Um, they claim the earth is flat?

That is just retarded.




If someone told me this in real life I would kill them. I would tell the cops to charge me with animal cruelty, because no intelligent human being could possibly say such a stupid thing.



There's a whole community of "Flat Earthers".  Pretty absurd, no?
http://www.theflatearthsociety.org/


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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: ThirdParty]
    #10858530 - 08/14/09 10:51 AM (14 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

ThirdParty said:
Quote:

Rocker232 said:
Quote:

Cannabischarlie said:
Um, they claim the earth is flat?

That is just retarded.




If someone told me this in real life I would kill them. I would tell the cops to charge me with animal cruelty, because no intelligent human being could possibly say such a stupid thing.



There's a whole community of "Flat Earthers".  Pretty absurd, no?
http://www.theflatearthsociety.org/




Yep, I've seen this. The stupidity of some amazes me. Makes me want to beat them to pulp to be honest.
Quote:

ThirdParty said:
Quote:

Rocker232 said:
Quote:

Cannabischarlie said:
Um, they claim the earth is flat?

That is just retarded.




If someone told me this in real life I would kill them. I would tell the cops to charge me with animal cruelty, because no intelligent human being could possibly say such a stupid thing.



There's a whole community of "Flat Earthers".  Pretty absurd, no?
http://www.theflatearthsociety.org/




I could not refrain from signing up and flaming.


--------------------
With Allure I Look to the Sky With Awakened Eyes


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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Rocker232]
    #10858559 - 08/14/09 11:01 AM (14 years, 5 months ago)

If they are on the net,can they not see photos from space,indicating that the world is in fact round?


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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: LobsterSauce]
    #10858618 - 08/14/09 11:21 AM (14 years, 5 months ago)

Seriously, they should look that up on wikipedia.


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OfflineThe Centre
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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: dr_gonz]
    #10858637 - 08/14/09 11:25 AM (14 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

dr_gonz said:
how old are you?




Who, me? 19, still living with my grandparents, and starting Collage next year (I needed a year off.), I'm going to study horticulture, and flee to the Amazon before South Africa ends up like Zimbabwe. (That is if the entire bloody world doesn't end up like Zimbabwe, then we are all screwed.)

Oh, btw, I was 13 at the time... In case you misunderstood me. Foreboding a 13 year old to do basically everything that he likes doing is just wrong. (With the exception of small periods of grounding him, not like how I was basically grounded for a year! Oh, and they took all my music too and burned the CD's, they took my card game (I believe it was magic the gathering.) and burnt up a years worth of allowance of cards "to rid the house of demons". Just wrong.)


Edited by The Centre (08/14/09 01:26 PM)


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OfflineThe Centre
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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: The Centre]
    #10859422 - 08/14/09 01:43 PM (14 years, 5 months ago)

Someone sayed they where talking about LSD, and yes, infact they where:

Quote# 61999

[re: the LHC]

They are supposedly looking for the "Higgs Boson" aka. the God particle, but I still say they are attempting to open a portal into the spirit realm with that thing.




Open a portal into the spirit realm through a Large H-something collider?

Nah, I do that with shrooms, why go through all that trouble?


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Offlinerobbyberto
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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: The Centre]
    #10859754 - 08/14/09 02:27 PM (14 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

The Centre said:


starting Collage next year







LOLZZY!



--------------------
“People say having kids is life changing, well that doesn’t necessarily mean a good thing, does it? I could take one of my legs off. That would change my life.” -Karl Pilkington



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InvisibleShroomismM
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Re: Awesome quotes from Quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: The_Ghost]
    #10859794 - 08/14/09 02:33 PM (14 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

The_Ghost said:
Quote:

Caribou_Lou said:
Christian fanatics are just as bad as suicide bombers.



Suicide bombing is an act. I mean a whole range of people could be one. These people are just fucking stupid tho.

"Several million years for a monkey to turn into a man. oh wait thats right. monkeys don't live several million years."




Yeah... but.... crazy ass ACTS originally start off as crazy ass THOUGHTS


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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: Le_Canard]
    #10860275 - 08/14/09 03:35 PM (14 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

ToiletDuk said:
My favorite:

"I can sum it all up in three words: Christianity is a lie". :lol:





Fixed

Oh and, the bible says you shouldn't lie, doesn't it?
So, that means, every single Christian is going to hell, because they lied to everyone!


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Offlinehidenseek
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Re: Awesome quotes from Fundamentalist Christian chat rooms [Re: The Centre]
    #13251335 - 09/26/10 09:21 PM (13 years, 4 months ago)

first good one i found


Quote:

I made a statement to my wife that I could talk to a person for about 15 minutes and could tell you if they were a Christian by their demeanor and what I see in their eyes. We went to a couples house to buy a chair and after about 30 minutes of conversation I was convinced these people were both Christian folks. I asked if they were and the man answered I am Muslim but my wife is Christian. My wife later commented on the fact that I became speechless!

When I meet a Muslim and especially a kind hearted, caring Muslim the first thing I want to say is I wish you would come over to our side, we could use you. The next thing that enters my mind is that if this person was a 'TRUE' Muslim he would not be married to Christian woman and he would be out there killing the infidels. (This man was a mechanic for TWA airlines!). The Koran specifically commands the Muslim to kill the infidels so if you accept 100% of the Koran, you will kill infidels. Comments???




or

Quote:

I've been a Christian for many years and can sometimes tell who's a Christian, but Mormons (a lot of my family is Mormon) act like Christians, but clearly aren't. They are some of the nicest people and would make wonderful Christians if they weren't deceived by Satan.
Reply With Quote




Edited by hidenseek (09/26/10 09:33 PM)


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