|
Darwin23
INFJ



Registered: 10/08/10
Posts: 3,277
Loc: United States
Last seen: 1 day, 21 hours
|
Re: The Official Utter Nonsense Thread [Re: Invisible_Woe]
#18277506 - 05/17/13 05:30 AM (10 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
Fuck STEVE BIKO! STEVE BIKO the genius, savior of blacks in South Africa. He died. He died. He died. Fuck Steve "Mega-Apartheid" Biko. Revolutionary.
--------------------
Take a look at my journal
|
Fatherroot
Amid the Adventure



Registered: 04/09/13
Posts: 1,396
Loc: Outside the Infiniverse
Last seen: 9 years, 7 months
|
Re: The Official Utter Nonsense Thread [Re: Darwin23]
#18277993 - 05/17/13 09:35 AM (10 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
"O freddled gruntbuggly / Thy micturations are to me / As plurdled gabbleblotchits on a lurgid bee / That mordiously hath bitled out its earted jurtles / Into a rancid festering
Now the jurpling slayjid agrocrustules / Are splurping hagrilly up the axlegrurts / And living glupules frat and slipulate / Like jowling meated liverslime / Groop, I implore thee, my foonting turlingdromes / And hooptiously drangle me with crinkly bindlewurdles / Or else I shall rend thee in the gobberwarts with my blurglecruncheon, see if I don't." -HGTTG
-------------------- "The only Zen you find on the tops of mountains is the Zen you bring there." — Robert Pirsig
|
WaffleBear
Stranger


Registered: 01/01/13
Posts: 233
Last seen: 2 days, 15 hours
|
Re: The Official Utter Nonsense Thread [Re: Invisible_Woe]
#18281864 - 05/18/13 01:20 AM (10 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
lol _____lol _____ lol _____ interest pays up and these fukking gay as fuk magazines don't fit in my revolver and badgers render non verbal facial vulgarity ill-go sketch factors warm up to army combat recon tanker pods with zero point shift convergents just like white wemen plane propellers accord along moving engine paths down playing hysteria and more alternative tech energy sauce
no effort drunk hammered at work again great composure for a dude with kids and cinco de mayo commonwealth monogamy red to blue is what mishandled "oh noes" is to water vulcan cannons actionable with satirical chess addiction failing boner causations charm koalas lacking depth underneath poor cliffs extremely declining says yahoo trends dimensional registry general winrar
they reiterate yahoo always contemplates pussy topics and once again we catch our breath
high fiving scoville units while willpowers catch a seat and crown milk-powder stages of intoxication molly packs a good tripping - dude, Molly got bent over by no-game-guy & got pregnant lulz
of not a bit actually damn convincing
but delight in finances loser face college bear man sham thing runaways to galaxies that dgaf about fiat cart wheels and hibernating sky rockets because ankles break and limbs are of billions of more available at a penny a piece if you're with final fantasy cartel movement why the phuck would viruses give fibro cliche and break the neck of Jones the mime like he propelled at all similar to that unamericanized forest badger got so ripped off and mugged of all pink emotions
sue the fuck out of everyone driving in the streets this will solve all problems with gingivitis & friends scheme to hold back disparity withdrawals enamel nexted to herbivores gone wild pondering stupid sh!t about sociological vulnerable mice
but real authors like Victoria sharper bust caps just like toys-r-us ceos whiskers perk up no more on my arms and they forgive and forgive brainwash and apply ointment background overtures taste like tea shills coordinating internet prediction foodchain sky dextral franchise in year whatever smaller atomic objects like riot gear cogs twinkling in your eye matter you should live your life superglued & twitched in self-interest marine umbrellas chilling out inb4 euphorics squad turns beast mode (chivalry never existed)
How could you win a conference battle like that?
staple on your door shit that makes them go 'HMMMM' and hope that keeps them from kicking it in or fire trance sweep into cooling magnet device revvvv, like burrrrrrrrrbbbbbrrrrrrhbuurrr upon millions reduced good work working that mirage sir maintain the disperses with marked reliability
or stay dwelling in the bushes you voyeur nautical trampoline guitar jook
do paddle your boat and default smart would have to change too no matter the brand
Edited by WaffleBear (05/18/13 01:49 AM)
|
twighead
mͯó



Registered: 08/27/08
Posts: 29,556
Loc: Glenn Gould's Fuck Windmill
Last seen: 1 hour, 39 minutes
|
Re: The Official Utter Nonsense Thread [Re: WaffleBear]
#18281956 - 05/18/13 01:44 AM (10 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
Isoprompt:
Notes 4.51: Take courage in the deficiencies of your fellow sailors, for they are beacons of perfection amidst an arrogant sea of imbalance.
Notes 5.17: Reveal your inner self to your disciples only once they have completed the dyarretic synchronism, violation of this tacit could result in soul imprisonment, or worse - if they are taught in the ways of the void - universal desynchronization.
Notes 6.11: Parensthetics. Parensthetics. Remember how you survived this desolation and thank the divine inventor for his stroke of genius, for we all subsist from its flowing sands.
|
Legend
RIP Sasha



Registered: 03/29/10
Posts: 28,336
Loc: TX
|
Re: The Official Utter Nonsense Thread [Re: twighead]
#18281968 - 05/18/13 01:49 AM (10 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
i pounded my keyboard, but now it's just a mess.
OP you were right it was lame, however since it's been
a dirty little keyboard, i violently mashed it's keys to misspell
some words as to teach it a lesson, that slut.
then i cheated on it with my mouse, made my keyboard watch too.
i wonder what they'll think of my new wireless equipment
sexy cordless hardware
--------------------
No sympathy for the devil, keep that in mind. [url=]Buy the ticket, take the ride. [/url]Are you lost?
|
Solo_Dolo


Registered: 09/26/10
Posts: 1,760
Last seen: 9 years, 11 months
|
Re: The Official Utter Nonsense Thread [Re: Legend]
#18281976 - 05/18/13 01:51 AM (10 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
-------------------- I can beat you to the punch line..or i could punch you to the beat.
|
WaffleBear
Stranger


Registered: 01/01/13
Posts: 233
Last seen: 2 days, 15 hours
|
Re: The Official Utter Nonsense Thread [Re: Legend]
#18282003 - 05/18/13 02:01 AM (10 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
flash crashed youtube died do stop doing actions and trust me he just smokes blunts all day bro don't tridiptilopwai-flood people's priorities bro blinder settings will reset and all will be good and well in the matrix trampoline saviors always save the falling dead cat midway good thing because my arms don't have enough whey granjewuls floating to catch that cat What does bodily hotness mean anyways? Really? undercover spy autobahn 1970's box cars WILL SHIT ON your steetlegal half million po esses and they can almost fly too fly over walls. ever heard of that? You fly over a wall with your Harley driving delusional intelligences.
what now awww shit, dancing ring things in my peripheral vision again (( hpv ))):
Edited by WaffleBear (05/18/13 02:11 AM)
|
Legend
RIP Sasha



Registered: 03/29/10
Posts: 28,336
Loc: TX
|
Re: The Official Utter Nonsense Thread [Re: WaffleBear]
#18282138 - 05/18/13 02:43 AM (10 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
sworn bear enemy, bare native land. vulnerable drunk nights, of waffles n chicken. horn tear flimsy; stocks of share blatant, bland. submersible lights, cloves, god awful beacons torn and their clear motive wont stand on round table heights, the tower topples. Sicken blankets, hungry ghosts do, all but care. on to the next realm, of heaven, or hell? sun sets while from the sea, fall toasts to dispair. aum, blessed balm my heathen shell come reconcile and be. Doll, you compare thee to a winters night, and even tho thy is free, centers might land, breathin' by this chi mentors sight, trancend and i fly. bliss tree root deep, cheifin tweakin demon beatin living dead, dying life, popped a molly and sweating officcal nonsense. till strife do us part, this thread eternal but i still managed to pound my keyboard again.
--------------------
No sympathy for the devil, keep that in mind. [url=]Buy the ticket, take the ride. [/url]Are you lost?
|
Fatherroot
Amid the Adventure



Registered: 04/09/13
Posts: 1,396
Loc: Outside the Infiniverse
Last seen: 9 years, 7 months
|
Re: The Official Utter Nonsense Thread [Re: Legend]
#18282988 - 05/18/13 10:26 AM (10 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
I'll see your nonsense and raise you 2 ears.
-------------------- "The only Zen you find on the tops of mountains is the Zen you bring there." — Robert Pirsig
|
hidenseek1
Its got all the dinks.

Registered: 12/22/12
Posts: 5,423
Loc: poop
Last seen: 6 years, 10 months
|
Re: The Official Utter Nonsense Thread [Re: Solo_Dolo]
#18283075 - 05/18/13 10:53 AM (10 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
Quote:
Solo_Dolo said:
my impression of a foe
-------------------- You can drink at 7 A.M., because the Beastie Boys fought for that right -------------------------------------------------------------------------- pons asinorum -------------------------------------------------------------------------- lsd and the vietnam war changed music forever
|
Invisible_Woe

Registered: 05/25/07
Posts: 11,707
Loc: Mabase
|
Re: The Official Utter Nonsense Thread [Re: hidenseek1]
#18284545 - 05/18/13 04:54 PM (10 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
WOAHAOAHAOAHAWAWAWAWAWAYAYAHAAHAHAAA
ahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
i hope you understand and acknowledge all thats passing through its constantly been there and throwing all that wasent blue
I hope your place and will find you shit and hopfully attain the final escape... So destructive self.
Does anybody know why?! Dose anybody know lime? Does anybody know the times?
Where is the muttlefrogs.. i came here expecting a feast!!
-------------------- These are not the answers you should be questioning.
|
Fatherroot
Amid the Adventure



Registered: 04/09/13
Posts: 1,396
Loc: Outside the Infiniverse
Last seen: 9 years, 7 months
|
Re: The Official Utter Nonsense Thread [Re: Invisible_Woe]
#18284747 - 05/18/13 05:58 PM (10 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
-------------------- "The only Zen you find on the tops of mountains is the Zen you bring there." — Robert Pirsig
|
the mad machinest
Medicine Man



Registered: 04/18/13
Posts: 4,249
Loc: parallel universe #420
|
Re: The Official Utter Nonsense Thread [Re: Fatherroot]
#18284758 - 05/18/13 06:01 PM (10 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
|
the mad machinest
Medicine Man



Registered: 04/18/13
Posts: 4,249
Loc: parallel universe #420
|
Re: The Official Utter Nonsense Thread [Re: Dietrootbear]
#18285531 - 05/18/13 09:22 PM (10 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
Quote:
Dietrootbear said: Version 1: I stepped into the Lebanese sandwich store in East Dearborn and my nose caught the scent of sweaty pickles. As the wind loudly pulled the door shut behind me a row of scowling old Arabic men waiting in line for their Shawarma and Falafel sandwiches turned around to face me. They know I'm half white, I think to myself. Feeling the urge to obtain my meal and extradite my body from the store with as much haste as possible I quickly relocate to the back of the line. An aged and very overweight Iranian man wearing a green sweater farts in front of me and acts like I can't hear or smell it. Suddenly a young African American with his face covered in cheddar cheese popcorn residue bursts into the shop wielding a handgun and tells everyone to get on the ground. The older gentleman in front of me farts again in anxiety, struggling to lay himself on the floor. I try to explain to the man with the gun that I have a back problem and I would simply prefer to sit down. I do not have a back problem but I do really want to sit down. He apparently is unaware of my query and is already making his way to the register. "Come on, come on!" he yells through leftover food particles. The cashier, oblivious to what the robber is exactly saying but still able to understand him through his knowledge of the intricacies of modern life begins to remove money from the register. At this point I am sensing a rumbling sensation in my lower body. Tilting my head down I find that I am urinating into my black shorts and onto the shop's floor. I am doing this not because I am afraid but because I have a neurological condition that makes it impossible for me to know when I am peeing. The black man notices this and starts laughing at me, wagging his weapon in my direction. I am saddened. The cashier, frightened beyond his wits only a moment ago starts to laugh and point at me as well. He yells terrible things in a language I am ethnically inclined towards but do not fully understand. The whole store is laughing, even the old Persian woman in a wheelchair with an oxygen tank who was sleeping through the ordeal a few seconds before now. The laughter dies down as they realize I have urinated so much that it has begun to pool all around the table I am sitting next to. Several people are looking very uncomfortable, wondering what is wrong with me. The robber has raised his right eyebrow and pushed his mouth agape as much as anatomically possible. The urine continues to pump out of my genitals, filling half of the store, rising higher and higher. The Iranian man, having passed out on the floor in terror wakes up to the smell of piss in his facial orifices. It takes him a few moments to realize what is happening. Once he does he quickly fumbles to his feet, slipping upon the yellow liquid once or twice. He rushes out of the store, disgusted, farting all the while. The discharge is still pumping out of my sand-chode. It is flooding the sandwich store. The robber and several other denizens thrash around in shock, some retching because they have never bathed in urine before. I try to explain to everyone over the commotion that there is really no reason to be upset because urine is sterile. They do not listen. The pressure from the fluid sends the front door to the shop crashing out onto the street as fifteen or more Arabs and a very demoralized black man who has lost his handgun follow suit. The police arrive with a medical unit specialized for these sorts of things. A young white man in a crimson wet suit swims towards the chair that I am still miraculously sitting on, submerged in egesta. He plugs my manhood up with an almond, saying that it is dipped in hemp lotion and will relieve some of my discomfort. I nod as he pulls me out of the shop wrapped around an orange jumper cable and hands me over to the police. They arrest me, being careful to place a towel on the hood of their cruiser when they slam my head down and cuff me because I am soaked in urine. I am still hungry.
Version 2: I stepped into the Lebanese sandwich store in East Dearborn and my nose caught the scent of sweaty pickles. I bought a falafel sandwich. Once I ate it I was not hungry anymore, but still disappointed as I realized I have a neck-beard.
best story I've ever read in my entire life! !!
|
WaffleBear
Stranger


Registered: 01/01/13
Posts: 233
Last seen: 2 days, 15 hours
|
|
two problems my pigeon has all my valuables on its person I think I need my wallet to travel places First I had my eyes on the bird, but it eventually got out of sight and next thing I know that eagle just chased it and tackled it to the ground someone stole my bike I just can't keep that damn thing in check and that black guy won't stop fleeing from houses I'd check on my pigeons status if that black guy didn't scare me away every time his terrified frantic acting is too convincing, I can't resist fleeing with and away from him why is he always in my proximity and why do I never see this horrid thing that is scaring him hopefully I'll find that pigeon again someday I forget what it had of mine that was so important. but I need that stuff to be in my possession soon
talking to that guy that looks familiar he wouldn't take my friends phone number. what a dick their personalities match, so why wouldn't they want to talk? the undersides of his eyes are too dark and his fatness is too high in his chest serious, somewhere in between all this mess, my bike went missing a home owner probably took it
and I discovered my car after running past... propped up in the middle of the street one tire was slashed fuck - why would they prop it up for me steaming... I'm just a tad too late.
I was headed to the mechanic before I even knew I owned a car there's a mechanic shop next to my broken car
From what I remember there's suppose to be a house there better ask the owner where to find that other mechanic I'm looking for he pointed in his direction... asked why I asked, since I already knew the answer He was right. I already knew.
I guess I asked for directions because the building foundation looked inviting in retrospect, not really - but, it was sunny out so things were lucid
there are no other cars in this area just people walking in three's
that bitch over there looks familiar I don't know her personally, but my younger relative knows her her ears are just like mine If I got to know her, we'd probably end up being good friends. I probably walked in because I need water
If I had my bike I could get to work in 30 minutes or am I in school these days? if only I had a belt
Edited by WaffleBear (05/20/13 02:13 PM)
|
the mad machinest
Medicine Man



Registered: 04/18/13
Posts: 4,249
Loc: parallel universe #420
|
Re: The Official Utter Nonsense Thread [Re: WaffleBear]
#18292855 - 05/20/13 01:23 PM (10 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
|
Fatherroot
Amid the Adventure



Registered: 04/09/13
Posts: 1,396
Loc: Outside the Infiniverse
Last seen: 9 years, 7 months
|
|
That's right. When I was your age, television was called books. And this is a special book.

Edited by Fatherroot (05/20/13 02:22 PM)
|
Invisible_Woe

Registered: 05/25/07
Posts: 11,707
Loc: Mabase
|
Re: The Official Utter Nonsense Thread [Re: Fatherroot]
#18293082 - 05/20/13 02:30 PM (10 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
Family has tried to heal all my addictions... Im giving into yuu Im giving in to  Ill get inside you... We wee wewowwawaaaa wowawawaaa woawaaa waaa Thing are changed enevr shame so feel this pain in the game of fame. he reason why you're gonna want to many changes this shit of me. If you could see through your green and all your needs you'd see that youre just as bad as me. I cant complain when i can pay the bills and do my thang So whats to fear when you realize you should do the things you can sustain!
The days when i was young Nowadays no one remembers when they were young and stupid. They would always say id never be shit... look at me you.
-------------------- These are not the answers you should be questioning.
|
Dietrootbear
makes u think



Registered: 08/23/11
Posts: 724
Loc: Sheffield, UK
|
Re: The Official Utter Nonsense Thread [Re: Invisible_Woe] 3
#18293432 - 05/20/13 03:47 PM (10 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
I'm not getting laid.
Possible Explanations:
-No one is getting laid. The entire world, for the last fifty or so years, has been completely celibate due to a farrago of fertility-inhibiting, impotency-inducing chemicals that are being circulated in our food, air, and water without our consent. All the babies are being manufactured in a gigantic UN-funded facility underneath Laos by old underpaid Vietnamese ladies. An intelligent ethnicity generation program has been developed by the lowest bidder in order to calculate what babies need to be born. They plop out of machines, rolling on conveyor belts, picked up at points by female workers on the assembly line with wrinkly hands and examined for defects or errors. This explains why all babies are born smelling like rice. Some imperfect children make it through though, Christ knows modern technology isn't perfect. If they do pass examination they are packaged immediately, and armies of truck-toting Covert Infant Insertion Crews transfer them to their destined wombs, implanting the children in the dead of night. The powers of the western world decided around 1961 that this would be the most reasonable solution for controlling the spread of communism. So far it has proved ineffective, and is up for review by the Board of Global Reproductive Affairs. As for normal people's boring day-to-day lives, all the sex they think they are having is really an ill-mannered fabrication of their own depraved imaginations.
-Getting laid isn't real. That experience which human beings have cum to distinguish as "the mating ritual" by now in their evolution is really an illusion brought about by our need to have purpose in life. Much like the question of theophanies and religious ecstasy, sex feeds upon itself, its enjoyment a result of self-actualization. That is to say, we are not really having sex, and never have, human beings decide to have children, and by will of their own psychic abilities bring the fetus into existence. The convincing state of mind that occurs within the brain after what we describe as "orgasm" only seems so pleasurable because we want it to. This can be compared to beer eyes, but on a much more metaphysical level.
-I am within the walls of a computer simulation designed by alien lifeforms in order to research my decaying body, recently excavated from a thousand year old condensed heap of kleenex. Miraculously I am still semi-alive, having been preserved by strange microbial lifeforms that evolved from the coagulated sputum and fluids surrounding me. Unfortunately, like a dream, this simulation has its limitations. Many of the most pleasurable biological activities we engage in on a regular basis cannot be carried out within this facade reality for sake of the fact that my true physiology is in stasis within the outside world, barely self-aware and damaged severely by cat-wires as well as bio-nuclear frostbite.
-I am an alien who has had its memory wiped and body replaced with that of a very unattractive man by the CIA and a variety of undisclosed corporations who decided that I would be a threat to their economic futures. Perhaps I am not unattractive, but rather gender targeted nausea-inducing pheromones have been surgically placed in my glands in order to deter possible breeding suspects. Perhaps my body was never replaced at all, but rather the perceptive hologram of myself that I choose to carry. In this case, I am an extraterrestrial life form to others, likely motivating them to refuse and avoid all chances to copulate with me even more.
-Maybe all women are psychic and thus know I wipe the piss off my socks when no one's looking.
-Maybe all men are psychic except myself, and I am therefore unable to communicate with a female in a regular, cogent manner.
-Maybe it's ya attitude, Johnathon.
-Maybe I don't exist at all.
-Fuck.
-Where's my hemp lotion?
-God have mercy on my pitiful, pita bread shoveling soul.
Edited by Dietrootbear (05/20/13 04:59 PM)
|
Mad_Larkin

Registered: 11/29/07
Posts: 18,606
|
Re: The Official Utter Nonsense Thread [Re: Dietrootbear]
#18293663 - 05/20/13 04:38 PM (10 years, 8 months ago) |
|
|
Are you on an E?
|
|