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Plok
Life is fractal


Registered: 09/08/04
Posts: 1,152
Loc: Los Angeles
Last seen: 2 months, 7 days
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Post your lame jokes here
#7855018 - 01/09/08 05:44 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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The cornier the better!
I'm skate BORED!!
-------------------- Just say NO to the War on Drugs.
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mycopsycho
Tit Inspector.



Registered: 06/17/04
Posts: 3,712
Loc: Going Nowhere Fast
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Plok]
#7855020 - 01/09/08 05:45 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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knock, knock...
-------------------- I Am The Sickness. Diploid: I think adults have a right to make stupid decisions and it's nobody else's fucking business.
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wrestler_az
PsiLLy BiLLy



Registered: 08/11/02
Posts: 13,676
Loc: day dreams of a mad man
Last seen: 15 hours, 30 minutes
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: mycopsycho]
#7855044 - 01/09/08 05:50 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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whos there?
-------------------- how's your WOW?
Edited by yageman (04/20/06 4:20 PM)
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mycopsycho
Tit Inspector.



Registered: 06/17/04
Posts: 3,712
Loc: Going Nowhere Fast
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: wrestler_az]
#7855051 - 01/09/08 05:51 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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idk, you waited to long to answer the fucking door
-------------------- I Am The Sickness. Diploid: I think adults have a right to make stupid decisions and it's nobody else's fucking business.
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Chubba
Vape hungry

Registered: 07/05/07
Posts: 6,785
Last seen: 9 years, 4 months
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: mycopsycho]
#7855055 - 01/09/08 05:52 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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A fish jumped into a wall...
DAM!
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wrestler_az
PsiLLy BiLLy



Registered: 08/11/02
Posts: 13,676
Loc: day dreams of a mad man
Last seen: 15 hours, 30 minutes
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: mycopsycho]
#7855057 - 01/09/08 05:52 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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it was probably a jehovah...
-------------------- how's your WOW?
Edited by yageman (04/20/06 4:20 PM)
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fee
Im he who is the


Registered: 01/16/03
Posts: 18,238
Loc: amsterdam
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: mycopsycho]
#7855063 - 01/09/08 05:54 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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so a mushroom walked into a bar and asked for a beer the bar tender said "we dont serve your kind around here" and the mushroom said " why not im fun guy"
--------------------
blankk said to fee: btw you're a total fucking psychedelic pimp Turtletotem said: I want to become a sun worshipper, so next time an atheist smugly asks me where god is, I can point smugly at the sun and laugh my ass off. Then I drive away in my solar powered piece of shit car, cool stuff man. And then I go kill a bitch because the flaming orb in the sky told me to do so, and I don't know, oppress a few minorities here and there in the name of nuclear fusion? Religion is fun.
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Asante
Mage


Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 86,795
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Plok]
#7855065 - 01/09/08 05:54 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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A bear and a rabbit were taking a dump next to each other by the river. After he finished up, the bear looked at the rabbit and asked him, "Excuse me, Mr. Rabbit, but do you have a problem with shit sticking to your fur?" "No, Mr. Bear, I don't," said the rabbit, so the bear picked the rabbit up and wiped his ass with him.
-------------------- Omnicyclion.org higher knowledge starts here
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Tangerines




Registered: 04/17/05
Posts: 17,918
Loc: woodwork
Last seen: 4 years, 23 days
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: wrestler_az]
#7855069 - 01/09/08 05:55 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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Wanna hear a dirty joke?? a pig fell in the mud!
What is a lesbian in the freezer called? a klondyke bar.
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? lickalottapuss
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mycopsycho
Tit Inspector.



Registered: 06/17/04
Posts: 3,712
Loc: Going Nowhere Fast
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Tangerines]
#7855080 - 01/09/08 05:58 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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i say its a tie between fee and wiccan_seeker so far. im leaning towards wiccan though.
-------------------- I Am The Sickness. Diploid: I think adults have a right to make stupid decisions and it's nobody else's fucking business.
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thoughts
imagining.


Registered: 10/06/07
Posts: 16,816
Loc: here.
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Tangerines]
#7855083 - 01/09/08 05:58 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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whattaya call a mexican with a rubber toe? Roberto
you know why jesus died? because the power of stan rules all humanity.
-------------------- I need Jesus.
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Tangerines




Registered: 04/17/05
Posts: 17,918
Loc: woodwork
Last seen: 4 years, 23 days
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: thoughts]
#7855086 - 01/09/08 05:59 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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WHat do you call a dog in the oven?
-a hot dog.
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fee
Im he who is the


Registered: 01/16/03
Posts: 18,238
Loc: amsterdam
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Tangerines]
#7855088 - 01/09/08 05:59 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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how do you know when its time to go to the dentist when its tooth hurty
--------------------
blankk said to fee: btw you're a total fucking psychedelic pimp Turtletotem said: I want to become a sun worshipper, so next time an atheist smugly asks me where god is, I can point smugly at the sun and laugh my ass off. Then I drive away in my solar powered piece of shit car, cool stuff man. And then I go kill a bitch because the flaming orb in the sky told me to do so, and I don't know, oppress a few minorities here and there in the name of nuclear fusion? Religion is fun.
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wrestler_az
PsiLLy BiLLy



Registered: 08/11/02
Posts: 13,676
Loc: day dreams of a mad man
Last seen: 15 hours, 30 minutes
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: thoughts]
#7855095 - 01/09/08 06:00 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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Quote:
iwasaClown said: whattaya call a mexican with a rubber toe? Roberto
ha, i loled.
-------------------- how's your WOW?
Edited by yageman (04/20/06 4:20 PM)
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Tangerines




Registered: 04/17/05
Posts: 17,918
Loc: woodwork
Last seen: 4 years, 23 days
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: fee]
#7855097 - 01/09/08 06:00 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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what did the painter name his son? Art
What did the picture say when he went to jail? He was framed.
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thoughts
imagining.


Registered: 10/06/07
Posts: 16,816
Loc: here.
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Tangerines]
#7855102 - 01/09/08 06:02 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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why do black people steal shit?
because theyre poor.
-------------------- I need Jesus.
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Tangerines




Registered: 04/17/05
Posts: 17,918
Loc: woodwork
Last seen: 4 years, 23 days
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: thoughts]
#7855107 - 01/09/08 06:02 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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What is the difference between a black person and a bucket of shit? the bucket.
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thoughts
imagining.


Registered: 10/06/07
Posts: 16,816
Loc: here.
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Tangerines]
#7855124 - 01/09/08 06:05 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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guess what
-------------------- I need Jesus.
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mycopsycho
Tit Inspector.



Registered: 06/17/04
Posts: 3,712
Loc: Going Nowhere Fast
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Tangerines]
#7855134 - 01/09/08 06:06 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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what do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in the water? bob.
what do you call a guy with no arms and no legs on the wall? art.
what do you wall a black guy with no arms and no legs in the water?
buoy.
mommy mommy, im sick of going in circles! shut up or i'll nail your other foot to the floor!
mommy mommy, daddys getting up! shut up and reload!
why dont black people like taking aspirin? they have to pick cotton to get to it.
-------------------- I Am The Sickness. Diploid: I think adults have a right to make stupid decisions and it's nobody else's fucking business.
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jewunit
Brutal!

Registered: 01/11/07
Posts: 34,264
Loc: Ohio
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: thoughts]
#7855137 - 01/09/08 06:06 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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Chicken butt?!
-------------------- !
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thoughts
imagining.


Registered: 10/06/07
Posts: 16,816
Loc: here.
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: jewunit]
#7855143 - 01/09/08 06:07 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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yeah but guess why
-------------------- I need Jesus.
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LongLiveRooster
Stranger

Registered: 01/07/08
Posts: 7
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: jewunit]
#7855146 - 01/09/08 06:07 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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why cant witches have babies?
cause their husbands have halloweenies......
-------------------- LONG LIVE THE ROOSTER
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jewunit
Brutal!

Registered: 01/11/07
Posts: 34,264
Loc: Ohio
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: thoughts]
#7855153 - 01/09/08 06:08 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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Chicken thigh, probably.
-------------------- !
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thoughts
imagining.


Registered: 10/06/07
Posts: 16,816
Loc: here.
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: jewunit]
#7855158 - 01/09/08 06:08 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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guess where.
chicken hair
-------------------- I need Jesus.
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LongLiveRooster
Stranger

Registered: 01/07/08
Posts: 7
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: thoughts]
#7855165 - 01/09/08 06:09 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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okay......these next two will get ugly
-------------------- LONG LIVE THE ROOSTER
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LongLiveRooster
Stranger

Registered: 01/07/08
Posts: 7
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how do you fit 100 jews in a 4 seated car?
2 in the front, 2 in the back and the rest in the ash tray
-------------------- LONG LIVE THE ROOSTER
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fee
Im he who is the


Registered: 01/16/03
Posts: 18,238
Loc: amsterdam
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: jewunit]
#7855170 - 01/09/08 06:10 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel on his pants the bar tender says why do you have a steering wheel on your pants the pirate says "aaarrgh drive me nuts"
--------------------
blankk said to fee: btw you're a total fucking psychedelic pimp Turtletotem said: I want to become a sun worshipper, so next time an atheist smugly asks me where god is, I can point smugly at the sun and laugh my ass off. Then I drive away in my solar powered piece of shit car, cool stuff man. And then I go kill a bitch because the flaming orb in the sky told me to do so, and I don't know, oppress a few minorities here and there in the name of nuclear fusion? Religion is fun.
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LongLiveRooster
Stranger

Registered: 01/07/08
Posts: 7
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whats the diff between a jew and a pizza?
a pizza doesnt scream in the oven
-------------------- LONG LIVE THE ROOSTER
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LongLiveRooster
Stranger

Registered: 01/07/08
Posts: 7
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theres 2 rubber duckies seating in a bath tub. one drops the soap so he turns to the other and says, "will you get that for me?" he replies with, "what do i look like? a type writter?"
-------------------- LONG LIVE THE ROOSTER
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jewunit
Brutal!

Registered: 01/11/07
Posts: 34,264
Loc: Ohio
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Quote:
LongLiveRooster said: how do you fit 100 jews in a 4 seated car?
2 in the front, 2 in the back and the rest in the ash tray
It's supposed to be a VW, not just any car
-------------------- !
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Penguarky Tunguin
f n o r d


Registered: 08/08/04
Posts: 17,192
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Did you here about the fire at the circus?
It was in tents.
-------------------- Every mistake, intentional or otherwise, in the above post, is the fault of the reader.
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thoughts
imagining.


Registered: 10/06/07
Posts: 16,816
Loc: here.
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-------------------- I need Jesus.
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LongLiveRooster
Stranger

Registered: 01/07/08
Posts: 7
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what do you call 4 mexicans drowning?
quatro cinco
-------------------- LONG LIVE THE ROOSTER
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LongLiveRooster
Stranger

Registered: 01/07/08
Posts: 7
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how do you save a black guy from hanging?
cut the rope.
how do you save a black guy from drowing?
take your foot off his head.
-------------------- LONG LIVE THE ROOSTER
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Asante
Mage


Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 86,795
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A Mexican, a Canadian and an American walk into a bar. The bartender looks at them and asks: "what is this, a joke?"
-------------------- Omnicyclion.org higher knowledge starts here
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SouthPArk
C'est La Vie


Registered: 05/11/05
Posts: 740
Loc: SouthPArk
Last seen: 11 years, 5 months
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Asante]
#7855251 - 01/09/08 06:26 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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How do you turn a Dishwasher into a Snowblower?? hand the bitch a shovel..
What's worse than a dead baby nailed to a tree? A dead baby nailed to a puppy...
How do you make a hormone? Don't pay her...
How many emos does it take to change a light bulb? ..None, they all just sit in the dark and cry
and the lamest of the lame...
What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.
--------------------
Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.
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Idiot
I Am Moron!



Registered: 11/27/05
Posts: 6,554
Loc: 41.90231, 12.45390
Last seen: 7 days, 20 hours
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So theres a Irishman, a German, and a Poloc and there trading party stories. The German says I know of this bar where you buy one beer and the bar buys you a beer then you buy a beer and then the bar.
Well, the Irishman came back with a story about a bar that bought you two beers for every beer you bought.
But the Pollock had the best story, said "I heard of this bar where you buy a beer, then buy another beer, then go in back and fuck."
Then the Irish man asked him if he's been to the bar to which the Pollock replied "No, but my sister has been."
-------------------- Customize your Shroomery experience! Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
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learningtofly
Ancient Aliens



Registered: 05/21/07
Posts: 15,105
Loc: Out of this world
Last seen: 12 years, 5 months
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: SouthPArk]
#7855310 - 01/09/08 06:41 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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Yer mom Thats what she said Why did moses lead the jews through the desert for 40 yrs? - one of them dropped a quarter A guy walks into a doctor's office and says, "Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green, Green Grass of Home.'"
The doctor hears this, thinks for a moment, then says, "Sounds like you have Tom Jones Syndrome."
"Is it common?"
"Well, it's not unusual."
--------------------
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Robo
R Series 66Y
Registered: 05/08/07
Posts: 14,861
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So there's this Mexican,A Jew, and a Black that each walk into a bar. Ouch.
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Chubba
Vape hungry

Registered: 07/05/07
Posts: 6,785
Last seen: 9 years, 4 months
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Robo]
#7856073 - 01/09/08 08:52 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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Why don't you throw rocks at an Aboriginal on a bike??
Because it's probably your bike.
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jewunit
Brutal!

Registered: 01/11/07
Posts: 34,264
Loc: Ohio
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Chubba]
#7856106 - 01/09/08 08:59 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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Someone's from Australia.
-------------------- !
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Penguarky Tunguin
f n o r d


Registered: 08/08/04
Posts: 17,192
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Chubba]
#7856115 - 01/09/08 09:01 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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Quote:
Chubba said: Why don't you throw rocks at an Aboriginal on a bike??
Because it's probably your bike.
-------------------- Every mistake, intentional or otherwise, in the above post, is the fault of the reader.
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Essen
Vagina



Registered: 04/20/07
Posts: 228
Last seen: 15 years, 7 months
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What's long black and smelly?
The welfare line...
--------------------
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Idiot
I Am Moron!



Registered: 11/27/05
Posts: 6,554
Loc: 41.90231, 12.45390
Last seen: 7 days, 20 hours
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Essen]
#7856185 - 01/09/08 09:19 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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Whats brown and sticky?
A stick.
-------------------- Customize your Shroomery experience! Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
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Robo
R Series 66Y
Registered: 05/08/07
Posts: 14,861
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Chubba]
#7856207 - 01/09/08 09:23 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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Quote:
Chubba said: Why don't you throw rocks at an Aboriginal on a bike??
Because it's probably your bike.
That sir, is a total Aussie version of an American black joke
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Kickle
Wanderer



Registered: 12/16/06
Posts: 17,852
Last seen: 5 hours, 3 minutes
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Robo]
#7856220 - 01/09/08 09:25 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you?
Run the other way, she's got a grenade in her mouth.
-------------------- Why shouldn't the truth be stranger than fiction? Fiction, after all, has to make sense. -- Mark Twain
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Robo
R Series 66Y
Registered: 05/08/07
Posts: 14,861
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Kickle]
#7856232 - 01/09/08 09:28 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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How do you kill a blond?
Put a scratch-n-sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.
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Tangerines




Registered: 04/17/05
Posts: 17,918
Loc: woodwork
Last seen: 4 years, 23 days
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Robo]
#7856244 - 01/09/08 09:31 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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Why did the blonde have square boobs??
because she forgot to take the tissues out of the box
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Robo
R Series 66Y
Registered: 05/08/07
Posts: 14,861
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Tangerines]
#7856255 - 01/09/08 09:33 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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Your mom is so fat she had to be baptized at sea world
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Tangerines




Registered: 04/17/05
Posts: 17,918
Loc: woodwork
Last seen: 4 years, 23 days
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Robo]
#7856263 - 01/09/08 09:34 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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Oh yea? yo momma is sooooooooooo fat she walked on the rainbow and all the skittles fell out. AND the last time she saw 90210 was on the scale.
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Robo
R Series 66Y
Registered: 05/08/07
Posts: 14,861
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Tangerines]
#7856270 - 01/09/08 09:35 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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Your mom is so old she has Jesus's cell phone number and sat behind him in the third grade biatch
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Kickle
Wanderer



Registered: 12/16/06
Posts: 17,852
Last seen: 5 hours, 3 minutes
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Tangerines]
#7856271 - 01/09/08 09:36 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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yo momma so stupid she locked herself in the bathroom and peed her pants.
-------------------- Why shouldn't the truth be stranger than fiction? Fiction, after all, has to make sense. -- Mark Twain
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Robo
R Series 66Y
Registered: 05/08/07
Posts: 14,861
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Kickle]
#7856275 - 01/09/08 09:36 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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Well your mom is so fat she has to use a paint roller to put on her lipstick
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Kickle
Wanderer



Registered: 12/16/06
Posts: 17,852
Last seen: 5 hours, 3 minutes
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Kickle]
#7856277 - 01/09/08 09:37 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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What did one snowman say to the other?
Do you smell carrots?
-------------------- Why shouldn't the truth be stranger than fiction? Fiction, after all, has to make sense. -- Mark Twain
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Kickle
Wanderer



Registered: 12/16/06
Posts: 17,852
Last seen: 5 hours, 3 minutes
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Kickle]
#7856284 - 01/09/08 09:39 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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Why was six afraid of seven?
Because seven eight nine...
-------------------- Why shouldn't the truth be stranger than fiction? Fiction, after all, has to make sense. -- Mark Twain
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Robo
R Series 66Y
Registered: 05/08/07
Posts: 14,861
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Kickle]
#7856292 - 01/09/08 09:40 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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How do you know if you're staying at a redneck hotel?
When you call the front desk and say “I gotta leak in my sink” and the person at the front desk says “go ahead"
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Kickle
Wanderer



Registered: 12/16/06
Posts: 17,852
Last seen: 5 hours, 3 minutes
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Kickle]
#7856295 - 01/09/08 09:40 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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What does a guy with 5 penises say when he tries on a pair of pants?
Ah, fits like a glove!
-------------------- Why shouldn't the truth be stranger than fiction? Fiction, after all, has to make sense. -- Mark Twain
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Kickle
Wanderer



Registered: 12/16/06
Posts: 17,852
Last seen: 5 hours, 3 minutes
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Kickle]
#7856338 - 01/09/08 09:46 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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So a blonde goes into the dentists wearing a pair of headphones. The dentist tries his best to work around the headphones but eventually decides that is too difficult, and asks the blonde to remove them. The blonde shakes her head repeatedly, and the dentist continues to try to work on her teeth. Finally, he gets fed up with the damned headphones and yanks them off her head.
Before he knows what is going on the blonde is dead. Trying to find the source he puts on the headphones, and hears the message "Breath in, breath out, breath in, breath out" repeating.
edit: And I'm out, but this was a great thread, thanks for the laughs guys.
-------------------- Why shouldn't the truth be stranger than fiction? Fiction, after all, has to make sense. -- Mark Twain
Edited by Kickle (01/09/08 09:48 PM)
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burgerpizza
Stranger


Registered: 01/05/08
Posts: 218
Last seen: 14 years, 2 months
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Chubba]
#7856349 - 01/09/08 09:47 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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What's the difference between a gay man and a refrigerator?
The refrigerator doesn't fart when you take the meat out!
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Robo
R Series 66Y
Registered: 05/08/07
Posts: 14,861
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: burgerpizza]
#7856378 - 01/09/08 09:52 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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That was just uncalled for
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Smackshadow
It's Time for Wild Speculation


Registered: 09/27/05
Posts: 575
Last seen: 19 days, 12 hours
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: burgerpizza]
#7856382 - 01/09/08 09:53 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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Why do you bury lawyers 12 feet down rather than 6? Because deep down there nice guys.
The devil goes to a lawyer and says "I can make you rich, get you laid by the hottest models, give you everything you ever wanted, and all I want in return, is your soul, the soul of your wife, and the souls of all of your children"
To which the lawyer replied, "what's the ketch"
-------------------- The trouble with fighting for human freedom is that one spends most of one's time defending scoundrels. For it is against scoundrels that oppressive laws are first aimed, and oppression must be stopped at the beginning if it is to be stopped at all. ~H. L. Mencken~
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burgerpizza
Stranger


Registered: 01/05/08
Posts: 218
Last seen: 14 years, 2 months
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Robo]
#7856404 - 01/09/08 09:56 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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ohhhh yeah! you know you love it.
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Maverick
Lover of Earwigs!




Registered: 12/18/05
Posts: 13,437
Loc: Valleys of Willamette
Last seen: 1 day, 2 hours
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Tangerines]
#7856565 - 01/09/08 10:23 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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How does a pirate say Thank You in Japanese? 
ARRRigato.
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Robo
R Series 66Y
Registered: 05/08/07
Posts: 14,861
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Maverick]
#7856577 - 01/09/08 10:24 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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Two cannibals are eating a clown. One cannibal turns to the other and asks, "This taste funny to you?"
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burgerpizza
Stranger


Registered: 01/05/08
Posts: 218
Last seen: 14 years, 2 months
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Robo]
#7856600 - 01/09/08 10:28 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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haha. I like 'em all....I'm a sucker for a lame joke.
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Maverick
Lover of Earwigs!




Registered: 12/18/05
Posts: 13,437
Loc: Valleys of Willamette
Last seen: 1 day, 2 hours
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: burgerpizza]
#7856770 - 01/09/08 10:56 PM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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Once upon a time there was a very large office building in a very large city. This building had 40 levels: level 1, level 2, level 3, level 4, level 5, level 6, level 7, level 8, level 9, level 10, level 11, level 12, level 13, level 14, level 15, level 16, level 17, level 18, level 19, level 20, level 21, level 22, level 23, level 24, level 25, level 26, level 27, level 28, level 29, level 30, level 31, level 32, level 33, level 34, level 35, level 36, level 37, level 38, level 39, and level 40.
One day the owner of the building decided to get a PA system installed on every level, in case there was ever a fire and everyone in the building needed to be contacted at once. The system was installed on every level: level 1, level 2, level 3, level 4, level 5, level 6, level 7, level 8, level 9, level 10, level 11, level 12, level 13, level 14, level 15, level 16, level 17, level 18, level 19, level 20, level 21, level 22, level 23, level 24, level 25, level 26, level 27, level 28, level 29, level 30, level 31, level 32, level 33, level 34, level 35, level 36, level 37, level 38, level 39, and level 40.
One day, an employee named John was doing some paperwork on the 21st level when he saw the pager for the PA system in his boss's office. He could not resist. He picked up the pager, turned it on, cleared his throat, and told a joke. It was funniest joke anyone in the building had ever heard. They were rolling in the aisles, laughing their heads off. The accountants on level 3 were in tears. The engineers on level 34 were in hysterics. In fact, workers on every level -- level 1, level 2, level 3, level 4, level 5, level 6, level 7, level 8, level 9, level 10, level 11, level 12, level 13, level 14, level 15, level 16, level 17, level 18, level 19, level 20, level 21, level 22, level 23, level 24, level 25, level 26, level 27, level 28, level 29, level 30, level 31, level 32, level 33, level 34, level 35, level 36, level 37, level 38, level 39, and level 40 -- could not stop laughing.
He walked out the door of his boss's office, feeling all proud of himself, when who should he run into but his boss. "John, come with me now!" John relunctantly followed his boss back into his office. His boss looked at him with fury in his eyes. "John," he said, "your joke was very disruptive to the workers in this building! Productivity was decreased on level 1, level 2, level 3, level 4, level 5, level 6, level 7, level 8, level 9, level 10, level 11, level 12, level 13, level 14, level 15, level 16, level 17, level 18, level 19, level 20, level 21, level 22, level 23, level 24, level 25, level 26, level 27, level 28, level 29, level 30, level 31, level 32, level 33, level 34, level 35, level 36, level 37, level 38, level 39, and level 40! You're fired! Clean out your desk and get out!"
But then his frown softened and he added, "Still, I have to admit, that joke was funny on so many levels."
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Apollyphelion
Dungeon Master/Princess(1009)


Registered: 03/15/07
Posts: 16,757
Loc: Festival of Deaths
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: jewunit]
#7857326 - 01/10/08 12:28 AM (16 years, 23 days ago) |
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Cuz they're DYING to get in!
HA~~!!!
--------------------
"I'm looking at you looking at it" SUBSCRIBE TO MY YOUTUBE CHANNEL PLEASE! www.youtube.com/apollyphelion Creator of the World's Worst Comic Book
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Azen
Legalize ALL!



Registered: 10/04/05
Posts: 309
Loc: Seattle, Wa
Last seen: 10 years, 4 months
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Plok]
#7857720 - 01/10/08 04:38 AM (16 years, 22 days ago) |
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What time is bedtime in neverland?
When the big hand touches the little hand.
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Azen
Legalize ALL!



Registered: 10/04/05
Posts: 309
Loc: Seattle, Wa
Last seen: 10 years, 4 months
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Plok]
#7857723 - 01/10/08 04:40 AM (16 years, 22 days ago) |
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What's the opposite of Christopher Reeves?
Christopher Walkin'!
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justin340
Rock Star



Registered: 05/02/07
Posts: 357
Last seen: 12 years, 9 months
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Azen]
#7857804 - 01/10/08 06:10 AM (16 years, 22 days ago) |
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i got a necklace for my wife.
it was a good trade.
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thoughts
imagining.


Registered: 10/06/07
Posts: 16,816
Loc: here.
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Maverick]
#7858719 - 01/10/08 11:04 AM (16 years, 22 days ago) |
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Quote:
DRTMaverick said: How does a pirate say Thank You in Japanese? 
ARRRigato.
ur so azn
-------------------- I need Jesus.
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sam420
CertifiedReptilianOverlord



Registered: 01/14/05
Posts: 3,144
Loc: Scotland
Last seen: 8 years, 5 months
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: thoughts]
#7858835 - 01/10/08 11:24 AM (16 years, 22 days ago) |
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Guy sat in a restaurant waiting on his food.
All of a sudden a duck waddles over to the man with a rose in its beak, gives him the rose and says, "Your eyes shine like sparkling diamonds!"
To which the guy angrily calls over for the waiter...
"Waiter! I asked for AROMATIC duck!!!"
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i'm a spy huntin rap dinosaur from the future
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peepeepottypants
Stranger


Registered: 04/02/05
Posts: 1,040
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Re: Post your lame jokes here [Re: Plok]
#7859182 - 01/10/08 12:23 PM (16 years, 22 days ago) |
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How do you make a dead baby float?
One scoop of ice cream, one scoop of dead baby
How many dead babies fit in a trunk?
17
What did the man say when he walked into a bar?
ouch
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sam420
CertifiedReptilianOverlord



Registered: 01/14/05
Posts: 3,144
Loc: Scotland
Last seen: 8 years, 5 months
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what do you get when you put a baby in a box of knives and kick it down the stairs?
an erection
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i'm a spy huntin rap dinosaur from the future
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rexmundi
Stranger

Registered: 08/10/07
Posts: 314
Last seen: 14 years, 2 months
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what has four legs and one arm? a doberman in a playground
why can't helen keller have kids? because she's dead
how did helen keller burn her face? she answered the iron
how did she burn the other side? they called back
how do helen keller's parents punish her? leave the plunger in the toilet
what was helen keller's dog named? giudfhjkldfsah
what's the difference between a corvette and a garbage bag full of dead babies? I don't have a corvette in my garage
how many dead babies does it take to paint a house? depends on how hard you throw them
what is 12 inches long, purple, and makes women scream? crib death
how do you catch a special bunny? unique up on him
where do you hide a thousand dollars from a native? in his workboots
why is everyone so nice at the gay bar? they want to push in your stool
what's the difference between a black person and a tire? tires don't sing when you put chains on them
why did hitler kill himself? he got the gas bill
haha I've got more but I've run out of steam
-------------------- "I Love Democracy" -Emporer Palpatine Fuck the system.
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