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OfflineDrewwyann
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Social Awkwardness take II
    #7835046 - 01/05/08 11:01 AM (16 years, 27 days ago)

I made a post about social awkwardness a few weeks ago, that was about the awkwardness during a trip.

This thread is about awkwardness in every day life.

It seems to me that the more I do LSD, mushrooms, and things of the like, I seem to not give a damn what other people think about me other than people I am good friends with. I no longer hold much value in going out, and meeting new people.

Not because I don't want to meet new people, but because human social interaction is shallow, fake, and I can't participate in it seriously anymore. My eyes have been opened to the pure fakeness of it. Or at least I believe it is really fake.

Smalltalk. Nothing has been deemed by me to be more useless, or more gossipy than smalltalk. I can't stand it. It's just there to give an excuse for some one to talk to some one else, when they have real reason to talk to them.

Whenever people come up to me, they say 'Hey dude, whats up?'. Of course they are expecting me to say 'nothing', so they can go on with what they are about to say or ask that is the real reason they want to talk to me.

The only people that ask me how I'm doing, or whats up and mean it are my friends. They ask it sincerely.

Again, I would like to go out and meet new people, but I can't do it anymore. I want to, but I feel so awkward if I try to mask what I'm feeling about smalltalk, or not enjoying the conversation I'm engaged in.

I talked to my friend about this already, and it only made me more confused.
Any input?

Edit: I just reread this post, and it sounds a whole lot more negative than I am actually feeling. It just came out that way.


--------------------


Anyone need a glass pipe? : http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100002435158931

Love powerfully :peace::heart::peace:


Edited by Drewwyann (01/05/08 11:04 AM)


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OfflineMushroomTrip
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Re: Social Awkwardness take II [Re: Drewwyann]
    #7835075 - 01/05/08 11:10 AM (16 years, 27 days ago)

Quote:

Any input?




Yes.
Start telling everybody, when they ask you, what you ACTUALLY do, not what they "expect". :grin:
I mean, you yourself said that you don't care anymore what other people think, right? So, why do act like you do?
It's not healthy to cultivate this attitude. And this comes from someone who doesn't really like to be a social person. But it's one to be more in your own world, and something entirely different to complain and see flaws in people.


--------------------
:bunny::bunnyhug:
All this time I've loved you
And never known your face
All this time I've missed you
And searched this human race
Here is true peace
Here my heart knows calm
Safe in your soul
Bathed in your sighs

:bunnyhug: :yinyang2:


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Invisiblemecreateme
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Re: Social Awkwardness take II [Re: Drewwyann]
    #7835083 - 01/05/08 11:12 AM (16 years, 27 days ago)

Sounds like you need an over the top trip that will make you appreciate the small things in life, like little bits of smalltalk. I used to be the same way you say you feel, but I have oriented myself in a different direction. You are taking socialism and communication too seriously, sometimes I communicate just for the sake of communicating, not because I want something or I want to get some information from someone.


--------------------
No ONE wants to know the ultimate TRUTH, as soon as YOU find IT out, YOU want to forget IT.

You are everything's way of feeling itself.

Happy Schwag, everygodly!


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Invisibleappleorange
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Re: Social Awkwardness take II [Re: MushroomTrip]
    #7835085 - 01/05/08 11:12 AM (16 years, 27 days ago)

I don't think smalltalk is fake or shallow, it's just a way of connecting with people on a simple level.


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OfflineDrewwyann
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Re: Social Awkwardness take II [Re: MushroomTrip]
    #7835098 - 01/05/08 11:16 AM (16 years, 27 days ago)

Thanks Dr Teasy Thighs (thats fun to say).

That helped a lot. :smile:

Edit: your avatar is adorable.


--------------------


Anyone need a glass pipe? : http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100002435158931

Love powerfully :peace::heart::peace:


Edited by Drewwyann (01/05/08 11:18 AM)


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OfflineDrewwyann
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Re: Social Awkwardness take II [Re: appleorange]
    #7835102 - 01/05/08 11:17 AM (16 years, 27 days ago)

Quote:

appleorange said:
I don't think smalltalk is fake or shallow, it's just a way of connecting with people on a simple level.




The way I see it, it's a way to connect to some one in a superficial way. Smalltalk is composed of things that are more of less meaningless to me. Why engage in it, unless you want to climb up the social ladder?


--------------------


Anyone need a glass pipe? : http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100002435158931

Love powerfully :peace::heart::peace:


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Invisibleappleorange
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Re: Social Awkwardness take II [Re: Drewwyann]
    #7835118 - 01/05/08 11:21 AM (16 years, 27 days ago)

social ladder?

i don't think bullshitting with people really has any kind of agenda concerned with climbing some kind of social hierarchy.

if everyone actually said what was on their mind or just ignored people when they felt like it, I think the world would be a much more lonely place.


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OfflineMushroomTrip
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Re: Social Awkwardness take II [Re: Drewwyann]
    #7835131 - 01/05/08 11:25 AM (16 years, 27 days ago)

I'm glad I could help! :smile:
Psychedelics cam be very confusing at times and it takes time for out mind to adjust and integrate everything we get from them.
It is your case too, so relax and be more patient with yourself and with others.

And those are two red pandas... kissing :heart:


--------------------
:bunny::bunnyhug:
All this time I've loved you
And never known your face
All this time I've missed you
And searched this human race
Here is true peace
Here my heart knows calm
Safe in your soul
Bathed in your sighs

:bunnyhug: :yinyang2:


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InvisibleEll Ess Bree
reppin state tostate, wat uneed?

Registered: 04/25/07
Posts: 914
Re: Social Awkwardness take II [Re: Drewwyann]
    #7835132 - 01/05/08 11:25 AM (16 years, 27 days ago)

Man... I felt exactly the same at one point, and still do to a degree. But here's what you do.

Ignore them.

Or, say whatever your mind-machine comes up with in response to what they just said. They're giving you input, they're sorry their input isn't that good, but they don't think like you do, atleast just not yet.

You can outright be mean, if you really don't care, and that'll be fun for a little while, but it gets shitty 'cause people don't talk to you.

Have fun with them, man! They clearly show you the levels they're working with, and you claim to be able to see around them, so fucking... Dood. Play with them in their small levels with your bigger idea's floating around outside for them to catch on to, or just straight up dance around their arenas.

I mean, if they can only see this far, and you can see just beyond that, you can do things in the just beyond that will make absolute sense to you because you can see them, if they can't see into the just beyond, it's not going to make any sense and they'll get all confused and fucking... people do funny shit when they're confused.

YOU are in control when they are confused. YOU know what's going, they don't.

You can.... essentially use this against people.

Or just have fun with them.

So you're not bored.

And pissed off about their dumb shit.

Make sense?


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OfflineDrewwyann
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Re: Social Awkwardness take II [Re: appleorange]
    #7835149 - 01/05/08 11:29 AM (16 years, 27 days ago)

I wouldn't ignore people, Ell Ess Bree. I don't want to put negativity into the world more than I have to.

Imagine there is a social mask that people wear, and I am underneath a mask.

My mask it growing holes in it, and it is becoming more apparent to people I am talking to. And I don't see much point in repairing that mask.

Maybe not the best analogy, but thats essentially my feeling.


--------------------


Anyone need a glass pipe? : http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100002435158931

Love powerfully :peace::heart::peace:


Edited by Drewwyann (01/05/08 11:31 AM)


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OfflineMindGorilla
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Re: Social Awkwardness take II [Re: Drewwyann]
    #7835154 - 01/05/08 11:29 AM (16 years, 27 days ago)

You literally took my feelings and typed them.

Up until New Years I had quit drinking for about 5-6 months. I felt/feel exactly how you do and I found that alcohol was just another means to an end.


But exactly like you said, shrooms started changing me in a way that I couldn't stop.




Being social and going to parties is truly one big popularity contest, and the problem with mushrooms, ( not so much a problem ) is that they take you above that.

I don't mean to be conceded, but I'm a pretty popular person in my area.(Trust me I don't act like that) And one thing that I've always noticed is that I can get away and do a lot more then someone not as "popular" as me. There has been many of times when I say something that really isn't that funny, but if it comes from me it is. Or the simple fact that I can take advantage of situation with girls because of who I am and where I stand in my group of friends.



I guess the point I'm trying to make is that no one looks at each other for who they really are, they look at them as where they stand in the "social ladder". Which goes back to everything being fake.



I think the fact that I can be so popular with the guys and gals is simply because I'm "real" and I think someone that is just mediocre but real will always be better then someone awesome and fake. Isn't it a funny game that we play.


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InvisibleEll Ess Bree
reppin state tostate, wat uneed?

Registered: 04/25/07
Posts: 914
Re: Social Awkwardness take II [Re: MindGorilla]
    #7835181 - 01/05/08 11:39 AM (16 years, 27 days ago)

Man I already know what you're feeling, I told you to ignore them OR...

read that over again. If you don't want to ignore them, do the other part.

Fucking just take the mask off and get it over with.

You are what you are, and you're becoming what you're becoming.

Trying to hide it is what makes it awkward for you. The people around you obviously have no problems being the little things they are. Why should you have a problem being the big thing you're becoming?

Sometimes there is a lot of positive hidden behind a little negativity. A tetanus shot hurts like a fucking cunt, but hey, YOU'RE NOT GONNA DIE. Get what I'm saying?

Take control of what's happening before it gets out of control.

Getting back in control once it's spun wildly around for however long you let it IS NOT AN EASY THING TO DO.

You said yourself the mask is still just coming off.

It's going to come off.

Get on it!


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Offlineorigami.octopus
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Re: Social Awkwardness take II [Re: Ell Ess Bree]
    #7837286 - 01/05/08 09:15 PM (16 years, 27 days ago)

Take what i say with a grain of salt. I dont claim to be any wiser than anyone else.
(op)

I really want to say that i'm proud of you. I've felt the exact same things. Your not alone with this.

There are hundreds of fake people, many of which will never grow mentally or spiritually past eating the bullshit fed to them every day.
you are what you eat after all. :wink:

however, they are just at another place in their lives. Wish them the best, and some times drop a few hints to help them along to the next step of learning. Dont force anything. It will do them no good to have it forced.

Lsd, and psychedelics have the powerful potential to make you see things in a new light. To break social patterns, and change who you are as a person. Remember that. Take what you are seeing and learn from it. Use it to be more true to your self.

It might not be easy, but there are real people out there. that are not fakers and who wont indulge in all that bullshit. look for them. Were here for you.


--------------------
I like to look at mushrooms the way most people like to look at flowers.

this is an amazing game
http://www.kongregate.com/games/customlogic/sprout


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OfflineRonaldFuckingPaul
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Re: Social Awkwardness take II [Re: origami.octopus]
    #7837983 - 01/06/08 01:10 AM (16 years, 27 days ago)

You're not alone broham:mushroom2: You're not gonna go back to the way you were before psychedelics so don't long for that.  Plus the way you are now is better than before..you're just a tad bit more spiritually evolved than most..be yourself and free yourself:)  And just try to be a positive force in the world instead of a negative one.  What good has negativity done for our world?  Even if it's pointless small talk, stay positive broham:thumbup:


--------------------


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OfflineElBandito
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Re: Social Awkwardness take II [Re: RonaldFuckingPaul]
    #7838021 - 01/06/08 01:35 AM (16 years, 27 days ago)

Funny, I feel pretty much exactly opposite what you're feeling, Drewwyann. I cherish the "true" small talk. When somebody comes up to you just to say "Hey, what's up?" On a small scale, it shows they care. I put the word true in quotes because I feel like what you described isn't really small talk. I picture small talk being seemingly pointless exchanges between people, where your "bullshit" I picture being more one sided, and not really a conversation, as if one of the people is pushing something on the other. That is something to frown upon.

Going out and meeting new people, assholes and all, just goes to prove the value of the people worth knowing. Meet 500 jerks and 1 awesome friend? Great! You can always go out and interact and filter out the ones that are trash, but you can't shell yourself up and suddenly get tons of awesome friends.

Not really agreeing or disagreeing, more just giving my take on things.


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InvisibleEll Ess Bree
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Registered: 04/25/07
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Re: Social Awkwardness take II [Re: ElBandito]
    #7838303 - 01/06/08 06:22 AM (16 years, 26 days ago)

OR YOU CAN SAVE YOURSELF THE TIME OF MEETING PEOPLE AND STAY INSIDE AND DO ALL OF YOUR SCIENCE AND MATH!!!!!!!!!

AND WHEN YOU GET DONE, YOU'LL BE ABLE TO FIGURE OUT ANYTHING YOU COULD POTENTIALLY LEARN FROM ANY OF THE SWEET PEOPLE YOU'D MEET ON YOUR OWN.

Which is an astonishing thing to figure, I might say!

SCIENCE AND MATH!  NOW SMOKE!  :gethigh:


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Invisiblemanyc
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Re: Social Awkwardness take II [Re: Drewwyann]
    #7838322 - 01/06/08 06:34 AM (16 years, 26 days ago)

I know how you feel. Though my avoidant behavior is fueled by a disliking for cliques and posses and the limelight, it's also got roots in my general anxiety. Social situations, with STRANGERS mind you, are stressful as fuck for me.

I'm slowly learning to open my compassionate side a little more though, so I can enjoy life. There's no point holing up inside of your head.


--------------------

Hemp could Save the World.

"There is no flag that is large enough, to hide the shame of a man in cuffs." -Serj Tankian


:mushroomgrow:Know Thyself.:mushroomgrow:

"If the words 'life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness' don't include the right to experiment with your own consciousness, then the Declaration of Independence isn't worth the hemp it was written on."
-Terence Mckenna


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OfflineProskier
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Re: Social Awkwardness take II [Re: manyc]
    #7838438 - 01/06/08 08:15 AM (16 years, 26 days ago)

i have also felt this way for quite a while now. i too hate small talk. it feels like a waste of my time and there are better things i could be doing. since i dont enjoy small talk i usually dont listen or pay attention and so sometimes from time to time, i would miss something real. something of substance or relavance.

the conclusion i came to way that i have to be social. small talk can lead to some real friends, and it will suprise you because you werent expecting to make friends in these situations.

id say i lean to Elbandito's point of view.


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Offlinenookjohn
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Re: Social Awkwardness take II [Re: Drewwyann]
    #7838480 - 01/06/08 08:49 AM (16 years, 26 days ago)

Recreational drugs and especially psychedelics and MDMA but including the community have helped guide me down the path of ditching unneeded anxiety and other emotional states that serve to divide us.

Consider the television advertisements that were created to convince all viewers that they have social anxiety disorder, depression, or whatever mental health condition the drug they're pushing purports to cure. Psychedelics have wiped that all away and now I just relate to people. I don't care what your social position or income level is. We all look the same naked.

Rarely, I get the kind of anxiety I used to experience every day as a child. But that's because I just got way too stoned.


Edited by nookjohn (01/06/08 08:50 AM)


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Offlinezubi420
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Re: Social Awkwardness take II [Re: nookjohn]
    #7868730 - 01/12/08 11:29 AM (16 years, 20 days ago)

everything people say usually has a purpose. Otherwise it wouldnt be said. Unless they have tourette's or some shit lol.


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