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Pr0_X
CultivationLifer



Registered: 01/18/06
Posts: 617
Loc: Igloo's and polar bears
Last seen: 16 years, 1 day
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Need suggestions to pass a urine test
#7826786 - 01/03/08 09:36 AM (16 years, 29 days ago) |
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As the title says...
Well, a little background information just so no one here thinks to poorly of my cheating.
I was out of town working and had 2.0g's of weed, the night i arrived I smoked one joint, .5 and then drank my ass off with this guy that I work with that didn't smoke weed, he just drank. Anyways, the next day at work the owner asks me where my shit is, my weed, turns out this guy snitched out the entire 9 man crew, all of us had weed on us... Anyhow, I was so drunk the night before I didn't remember where I put my stash and didn't know what to tell the owner. If i had said its back at the hotel room he would have made me give it to him at the end of the day and everything would have been fine but I honestly thought Id lost it while drinking the night before... Turns out it was in a hidden pocket on my pants, and when I woke up to go to work in the morning I was running behind and just threw my work suit on so it covered up my pants pockets and I was pretty hung over from drinking with that narc the night before anyways.... When I did discover it on me it became a tricky situation because of the nature of this job so I thought I'd be honest and explain to the guy i was drinking with who had been there for 25 years what happened, well this guy says hey man, give me the weed and I'll take care of it, shit happens.... turns out he drove it up to the owner and told him I was lieing.... If i had been lieing I wouldn't have said shit all to anyone
I'm $2000 in debt and three months behind in my rent and bills because of that fucking asshole, anyways, the Main owner of the company told me he'd give me my job back if I pissed clean, didn't say he cared how I do it just as long as there is no traces of drugs in my system, what can some of the other people in the world tell me to help me pass this test so I can get my life going again. Thanks in advance, and yes I'm looking into detox drinks, anyone know of some good ones?
-------------------- It's okay to hurt my feelings cause you know, they're so numb anyway. but I guess it's what I get for being to fuckin stupid to stay away - Jake - Support the FSR at www.fsrcanada.com and www.fsre.nl
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im_on_a_boat
Stranger

Registered: 04/06/06
Posts: 3,950
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Re: Need suggestions to pass a urine test [Re: Pr0_X]
#7826802 - 01/03/08 09:41 AM (16 years, 29 days ago) |
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no.. and i wouldn't put money on any of that shit to work. why dont you just quit smoking? sounds like it has fucked your life up enough..
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royer
±±±±±±±±±±


Registered: 05/15/06
Posts: 4,801
Loc: anywhere but here
Last seen: 4 years, 10 months
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Re: Need suggestions to pass a urine test [Re: im_on_a_boat]
#7826820 - 01/03/08 09:45 AM (16 years, 29 days ago) |
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i tried almost everything to pass a test and nothing worked and i almost got thrown in jail, your best bet is to quit
some stuff works for some people but nothing worked for me and imo it is not worth the risk!
-------------------- ================================================= if you have any questions please feel free to pm me , thx :-)
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Pr0_X
CultivationLifer



Registered: 01/18/06
Posts: 617
Loc: Igloo's and polar bears
Last seen: 16 years, 1 day
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Re: Need suggestions to pass a urine test [Re: royer]
#7826856 - 01/03/08 09:55 AM (16 years, 29 days ago) |
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This is going to sound stupid but yea, I was a victim of poor mothering.... My parents were probably stoned when I was conceived and I know that she smoked while she was pregnant, they were both heavy smokers so its not like I'm just some kid from a class A family where either parent only ever try ed it a few times I was made while both parents had high levels of THC in their systems for years and years, it then becomes a genetic disorder, if i don't smoke I go crazy... As far back as I remember finding out what weed was I started pinching from my moms stash at 11, so Ive already been smoking over half my life to date...
I think even if i quit it would still show... Is there a legal road I could go? I mean, to fire one guy out of 9 because of a honest mistake is BS, I wouldn't do it to anyone and most the people I talk to wouldn't do it either so it was border line with discrimination.... I was told everyone was getting tested, that never happened either.... I just need the money I dont care about what the world thinks is right and wrong of me, I'm just trying to make a living.
-------------------- It's okay to hurt my feelings cause you know, they're so numb anyway. but I guess it's what I get for being to fuckin stupid to stay away - Jake - Support the FSR at www.fsrcanada.com and www.fsre.nl
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johnm214



Registered: 05/31/07
Posts: 17,582
Loc: Americas
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Re: Need suggestions to pass a urine test [Re: Pr0_X]
#7826893 - 01/03/08 10:06 AM (16 years, 29 days ago) |
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quit smoking now, drink lots of water, and take a B vitamin or three prior to the test to hopefully change your urine to look less dilute. You may be screwed though. Drug tests are most effective aginst marijuana, switch to heroin- your boss will thank you
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im_on_a_boat
Stranger

Registered: 04/06/06
Posts: 3,950
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Re: Need suggestions to pass a urine test [Re: Pr0_X]
#7826897 - 01/03/08 10:07 AM (16 years, 29 days ago) |
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well then move somewhere that marijuana is legal. if you are willing to fuck up your life in the u.s. doing it, then move somewhere else where it wont fuck up your life... or find a job where your boss doesn't give a shit if you smoke.
you might have to work with illegal immigrants, but at least you'll be happy, right?
even if you take 'legal' action, they are probably still going to piss/hair test you to prove that you are a smoker.. then you have wasted money you dont have on a lost cause.
sounds like your boss is cool enough to allow you back, maybe dont fuck it up this time and quit smoking... at least until you can pass a piss test.
sorry i'm being so harsh but i think someone needs to tell you straight because it doesn't seem like anybody else does.

damn i reread and i sound like a douche.. good luck in whatever you decide to do man. everyone goes through tough times. you gotta do whatever you gotta do to get your job back, though.
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pazzy
Always Hardcore


Registered: 08/24/07
Posts: 1,360
Last seen: 13 years, 2 months
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Re: Need suggestions to pass a urine test [Re: im_on_a_boat]
#7828186 - 01/03/08 04:13 PM (16 years, 29 days ago) |
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Quiting would be the best option but if you don't have time for your body to process the THC out you might want to cheat the system.
My buddy who is a heavy smoker never used his own piss on these tests. Depending if you know how the test will be given you might be able to switch your dirty urine with some ones clean urine. If you are caught you will lose your job but if you fail you will lose it anyway.
-------------------- Are you happy for a miracle?
Absolutely no source checks/discussions.
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rastafiedhippie
Stoner Kid



Registered: 12/31/07
Posts: 32
Last seen: 9 years, 8 months
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Re: Need suggestions to pass a urine test [Re: pazzy]
#7828625 - 01/03/08 06:19 PM (16 years, 29 days ago) |
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well so far ive passed about 4 test up to date, the trick is you cant smoke the day before but anyways. you get this stuff its called knox geletin. mix it all up with some water. chug it down, piss once before. and what you pee into the cup, is my guess just the water you drank while drinking the geletin. i guess some how the geletin coats your stomach or somthing. you can google this and find a much better step-by-step explanation. but im telling you it works! i got busted for posession and they strapped with probation and a weekly drug screen. i havint quit smokin that reefer not once.
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allreadyused
The Liquor



Registered: 09/10/07
Posts: 480
Loc: Trailer Park, Nova Scotia
Last seen: 8 years, 23 days
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Re: Need suggestions to pass a urine test [Re: rastafiedhippie]
#7829438 - 01/03/08 08:27 PM (16 years, 29 days ago) |
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FAKE PISS!!! Why quit when you don't have to? Unless you really want to quit. http://www.cleartest.com/products/synthetic-urine/ http://www.urineluck.com/ProductDetails.asp?ProductCode=QFIX
I've used both of these products many times in the past; they work. If your willing to spend the cash they can next day ship this shit. Otherwise it takes about a week. Here's what I would do if I were you... Buy the piss and pass your test. Go out drinking again with the narc and smoke right in front of him. Let him know you know he's a rat and a piece of shit. Now when he narcs you out again tell your boss the guy's lying and you'll take a piss test anytime. Use more fake piss to pass that test and the guy's credibility is fucked.
-------------------- Everything I say is for entertainment. Fuck the ASPCA
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johnm214



Registered: 05/31/07
Posts: 17,582
Loc: Americas
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Re: Need suggestions to pass a urine test [Re: rastafiedhippie]
#7829559 - 01/03/08 09:00 PM (16 years, 29 days ago) |
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Quote:
rastafiedhippie said: is my guess just the water you drank while drinking the geletin.
no
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Pr0_X
CultivationLifer



Registered: 01/18/06
Posts: 617
Loc: Igloo's and polar bears
Last seen: 16 years, 1 day
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Re: Need suggestions to pass a urine test [Re: johnm214]
#7829965 - 01/03/08 10:22 PM (16 years, 29 days ago) |
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I found a urine masking product today
How does it work? Urine drug tests detect drug usage by testing urine samples for metabolites that are released in urine when fat cells are burned. Absolute Detox Carbo Drinks inhibit the body’s ability to metabolize the fat cells that store drug toxins, allowing you to pass a drug test for up to 5 hours.
Straight from their website, it's money back guarntee'd and claims to have a 99.87% success rate, it also makes perfect sense to me rather then hearing about products that just make you urinate alot to get it out of your system faster, in actuality it would take years of not smoking and alot of exercise to fully clean THC out of one's system...
This has been a great learning experience so far, i'll let you all know how it goes and much appreication for the advice guys, thanks a million.
Imo, if it means anything to anyone the guy that narc'd out the crew, I called him a snitch and he flipped out and tryed to choke me out, I threw that POS down a hill and the one owner couldnt say anything to his brother which is the main owner because he'd have fired the narc and then they'd be screwed.... So yea, that's what they deserv.
-------------------- It's okay to hurt my feelings cause you know, they're so numb anyway. but I guess it's what I get for being to fuckin stupid to stay away - Jake - Support the FSR at www.fsrcanada.com and www.fsre.nl
Edited by Pr0_X (01/03/08 10:24 PM)
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johnm214



Registered: 05/31/07
Posts: 17,582
Loc: Americas
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Re: Need suggestions to pass a urine test [Re: Pr0_X]
#7830251 - 01/03/08 11:20 PM (16 years, 29 days ago) |
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"Absolute Detox Carbo Drinks inhibit the body’s ability to metabolize the fat cells that store drug toxins, allowing you to pass a drug test for up to 5 hours."
ehh...
sugar water will also limit your fat metabolism
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four20snakeman
Background Noise


Registered: 06/11/03
Posts: 1,462
Loc: /\ /\ Right there /\ /\
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Re: Need suggestions to pass a urine test [Re: Pr0_X]
#7830289 - 01/03/08 11:34 PM (16 years, 29 days ago) |
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Quote:
Pr0_X said: ...rather then hearing about products that just make you urinate a lot to get it out of your system faster,...
They don't make you urinate more to get it out of your system faster. You are supposed to drink a good amount of water with them, that much is true. You aren't drinking the water to actually flush your system, you are drinking the water to dilute your urine, to help with the diuretic effect of the clean out. Any good "clean out" has herbs and minerals in it to keep the color and createne (sp?) levels on par with undiluted pee, those things drop when you drink just plain water.
I have had good luck with the Detoxify brand "XXTra Clean."
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fastfred
Old Hand



Registered: 05/17/04
Posts: 6,899
Loc: Dark side of the moon
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Re: Need suggestions to pass a urine test [Re: four20snakeman]
#7830589 - 01/04/08 01:38 AM (16 years, 29 days ago) |
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Detox products DO NOT WORK. At least the way they claim. There are all manner of things that can help flush your system out faster, but there is nothing that will make you pee clean the next day.
Gelatin is one of the dumber and more ridiculous things that have been going around for awhile now. Anyone with even the most basic understanding of nutrition or chemistry will realize this.
Limiting fat metabolism isn't a valid method either. Most Americans eat well more than enough calories to limit fat metabolism.
Anways there are a few good tips. Goldenseal will help flush out your ststem, but some drug tests will test for it. Niacin helps flush out your system and makes your pee yellow. Drinking a lot of water helps flush out your system and will dilute your pee to below the positive level.
There's no alternative to quitting your drug usage, except for using clean pee. Cheating with clean pee works great and I highly reccomend it.
Anyhow, all your measures are just treating the symptoms. What you really need to do is clear your environment of narcs. Oldskool wisdom is to just kill and bury them, but not everyone has the balls or stomach for that kind of thing.
I see two easy options for you.
#1 You should have done right away. If somebody wants your weed then give it to them. Then call the cops and tell them that so-and-so has weed, is intoxicated, and is operating a motor vehicle. Tell them their name, license #, description of the vehicle, and where they're headed. When they get busted make sure to laugh your ass off and tell the boss that the person should be fired. If it's your boss then all the better. You'll have a good case if they fire you in reprisal for reporting their criminal activity.
#2 Call the narcs narcs to their face at least several times a day and spit on them in disgust. Get as many other people in on it as you can. If they don't have the balls to attack you they'll probably leave before long. If they do have the balls to attack then beat the living piss out of them. If you're smart you'll have some sort of blunt object handy so that you can bust one or both of their knees. If a narc doesn't spend at least a week in the hospital then you're letting yourself get fucked over and letting that narc continue to fuck others over.
Back in my day narcs just dissappeared quite often. Hard to say if they left because everyone hated them and they feared getting beat/killed or if they were actually buried somewhere. Either way if you were a narc you better be leaving town before people find out.
That's how we did things in the good old days. Nowdays I hear of narcs running wild, even narcing out the same group of people multiple times. A little smarts and some street justic go a long way.
-FF
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rastafiedhippie
Stoner Kid



Registered: 12/31/07
Posts: 32
Last seen: 9 years, 8 months
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Re: Need suggestions to pass a urine test [Re: johnm214]
#7831367 - 01/04/08 09:58 AM (16 years, 28 days ago) |
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Quote:
johnm214 said:
Quote:
rastafiedhippie said: is my guess just the water you drank while drinking the geletin.
no
you may say no, but i say yes! ive used this method on multiple occasions a it truely does work. it does dilute your urine a bit but hey it makes your urine negative for weed. just do a google search on it im telling you other people have used this.
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johnm214



Registered: 05/31/07
Posts: 17,582
Loc: Americas
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Re: Need suggestions to pass a urine test [Re: rastafiedhippie]
#7831501 - 01/04/08 10:37 AM (16 years, 28 days ago) |
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correlation vs. causality
I was just saying that the water that enters your mouth doesn't pass through straight to your bladder unless you've got a nice fistula or something.
mouth to pooper is the only straight shot
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fastfred
Old Hand



Registered: 05/17/04
Posts: 6,899
Loc: Dark side of the moon
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Re: Need suggestions to pass a urine test [Re: johnm214]
#7833110 - 01/04/08 07:04 PM (16 years, 28 days ago) |
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Gelatin can have no possible effect on the outcome of a urine test. Gelatin is an irreversibly hydrolyzed form of collagen. i.e. it's just a long polypeptide aka protein. It is completely diced up by your digestive system before it is able to make it into the bloodstream. Additionally it contains no amino acids that your body doesn't already make. So there is no possibility that it will do ANYTHING for you. It's not even a good source of nutrition as it contains no essential amino acids.
The world is full of people who swear by things that obviously have no effect on outcome. If you want to believe in a superstition, that's fine but don't screw up other people by spreading disinformation.
-FF
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sashasch5
jumping bean
Registered: 12/25/07
Posts: 31
Last seen: 15 years, 9 months
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Re: Need suggestions to pass a urine test [Re: fastfred]
#7835284 - 01/05/08 12:09 PM (16 years, 27 days ago) |
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johnm214



Registered: 05/31/07
Posts: 17,582
Loc: Americas
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Re: Need suggestions to pass a urine test [Re: sashasch5]
#7835309 - 01/05/08 12:16 PM (16 years, 27 days ago) |
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seems like reasonable suggestions from that last poster
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