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Jadian
Ninja



Registered: 07/07/05
Posts: 7,404
Loc: The desert
Last seen: 6 years, 1 month
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Re: I saw my first dead body [Re: Serdal]
#7795384 - 12/24/07 11:56 AM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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I actually don't look at the bodies at a wake or a funeral. The last thing I want to remember about my friend or loved one isn't a horribly painted up face and their hair styled in a way they'd never have been caught dead with it in public.
I'll keep the good memories and move on without the bad.
-------------------- LNC's official Alaskan stoner
 
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danlennon3
LivingIsEasyWithEyesClosed.....



Registered: 10/29/02
Posts: 19,246
Loc: usa
Last seen: 1 year, 12 days
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Re: I saw my first dead body [Re: Jadian]
#7795403 - 12/24/07 12:03 PM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Jadian said: The last thing I want to remember about my friend or loved one isn't a horribly painted up face and their hair styled in a way they'd never have been caught dead with it in public.
irony at its greatest
-------------------- "Psychedelics should be used not to escape reality, but to embrace it"
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Coaster
BaĘżal



Registered: 05/22/06
Posts: 33,501
Loc: Deep in the Valley
Last seen: 12 years, 3 months
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Re: I saw my first dead body [Re: danlennon3]
#7795409 - 12/24/07 12:05 PM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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after rolling and dancing all nite i had 2 go 2 my grandmas funeral and i was a casket bearer it was hard ever1 was so sad and i was still a lil happy from the nite be4 but anyways i think thats the best way 2 go 2 a funeral when ur still rolling so its not so difficult it was an open casket too, then we had 2 carry it to the hole
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CherryBom
Yoga Gypsy


Registered: 12/26/98
Posts: 11,177
Loc: Ontario
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Re: I saw my first dead body [Re: Coaster]
#7795775 - 12/24/07 02:07 PM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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You went to your grandmothers funeral half stoned from the crazy party the night before? Am I reading this right? You should be with your family offering love and support.
I don't know if I have ever heard something so disgustingly disrespectful and ignorant.
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Dreamer987
The VerbalHerman Munster


Registered: 04/15/03
Posts: 5,326
Loc: Texas
Last seen: 16 years, 1 month
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Re: I saw my first dead body [Re: CherryBom]
#7795922 - 12/24/07 03:18 PM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
CherryBom said: You went to your grandmothers funeral half stoned from the crazy party the night before? Am I reading this right? You should be with your family offering love and support.
I don't know if I have ever heard something so disgustingly disrespectful and ignorant.
for real. when my homie Mike died i specificly abstained from getting intoxicated for a week or two, just to make sure i didn't fuck up the grieving process. I was worried that if i didn't keep a clear head it would make me bottle up my emotions, and deal with them inapropriately later. I don't know if it did any good. I still feel like i either haven't completely accepted it, or gotten over it yet.
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Yoschie99
nomad



Registered: 11/24/99
Posts: 3,149
Loc: center of earth
Last seen: 2 months, 17 days
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Re: I saw my first dead body [Re: Serdal]
#7796071 - 12/24/07 04:17 PM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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i remember seeing my first casualty of a car accident when i was about 8.. she had went out the windshield of her car and was lying halfway onto the hood...
saw someone seize, bite their tongue off and then collapse at a party in 2000 right at my feet.. he later died from an aneurysm..
2002.. a friend got hit by a car right in front of the bar we were at... i was the first one to go out into the street w/ the cops and take a look at the body.. nobody else wanted to do it. They wouldn't remove the sheet completely since i wasn't family... but i got to see enough for the cop to tell me, "i think you should go get his family." That one fucked me up for a while..
i, too, hate funerals/viewings.. but, it is the last chance you'll get to see your friend/family member and tell them to their face how much you care about them.. or how angry you are.. or whatever. Painted face and bad hair.. it's still a chance and does wonders for bringing out the emotions you're holding inside.
It never gets easier dealing with death initially.. the first reaction is always sadness. I get pretty choked up when i go by a fatal accident or crime scene or something.. and when it hits close within my group of friends or something, it really hurts. But, I have learned to roll from sadness to remembering that everything is cyclical, pretty quickly... there has to be an end for there to be a new beginning... we are not the judges of proper time, so there's nothing to be that upset about.. it just is.
Be glad your first dead body was a stranger... it was pretty horrible, but it could have been much worse. Gives you the extra time to let those that are important know how much you care about them until it's their time...
yos-
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Brugman
antisobrietarian



Registered: 05/16/01
Posts: 15,887
Loc: the land up over
Last seen: 10 years, 9 months
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Re: I saw my first dead body [Re: Jadian]
#7796163 - 12/24/07 04:43 PM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Jadian said: Itheir hair styled in a way they'd never have been caught dead with it in public.
That saying makes more sense to me now..
And it's strange. A dead body is the same thing as when they were alive, but you see.. there's no glow, no soul. Makes me think.
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lavod
Seal Whisperer


Registered: 06/23/06
Posts: 5,440
Loc: Over the rainbow
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93 The first dead person I saw was also a pedestrian hit by a car laying on the side of the road, her lifeless vessel soaked in fresh blood. At a single didgit age, this was indeed a powerful experience and one that leaves a strong imprint upon one's consciousness. A young Jim Morrison had a most interesting account involving native americans who were killed in an auto accident. To see death in it's true form is quite different from seeing a dandied up corpse in a casket. 93 93/93
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WakeboardrB
Pepe Silvia



Registered: 05/18/03
Posts: 13,678
Last seen: 11 years, 6 months
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Re: I saw my first dead body [Re: lavod]
#7796272 - 12/24/07 05:33 PM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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A few months ago I was taking my brother to work early in the morning. As we approached the Auto shop he was interning at, we ran into a lot of traffic, police cars and even VDOT was out with big signs directing traffic.
As we came up on it I was all excited to see if there was a horrible traffic accident and was ready to see a nice display of twisted metal. Unfortunately all I saw was 4 police cars, the forensics team and a body laying in the middle of the street with a sheet covering it. The forensics investigators were busy measuring skid marks and using laser surveying tools to measure the evidence.
It turned out that at about 5am someone was crossing the busy 4 lane highway to get breakfast at the McDonalds across the street when he was clipped by a SUV on the edge of the road. That impact threw him two lanes over into the middle of the street where he impacted with the windshield of a Volvo station wagon.
As I passed by going the opposite direction, I could see a small trail of blood coming from the head area of the covered up body and a leg with ankle and foot twisted in the opposite direction was sticking out from under the sheet.
That was bad enough, but since there was so much traffic from all but 1 lane of traffic closed off and morning rush hour, I was stuck right next to the accident scene for about 20 minutes. 20 minutes of just looking at that body and the police gathering evidence.
I felt terrible for the two people driving the vehicles that hit the man. Of course I felt bad for the man who lost his life, but his end was pretty quick. The people that hit him probably had their entire world turned upside down. Especially since neither of them were charged with causing his death. They weren't responsible for him crossing the road just a few seconds too early.
Needless to say it ruined the rest of my day.
-------------------- Same thing happened to me when I played Neil Armstrong in Moonshot. They found me in an alley in Burbank trying to re-enter the earth's atmosphere in an old refrigerator box.
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WakeboardrB
Pepe Silvia



Registered: 05/18/03
Posts: 13,678
Last seen: 11 years, 6 months
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Re: I saw my first dead body [Re: Brugman]
#7796274 - 12/24/07 05:35 PM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Brugman said:
Quote:
Jadian said: Itheir hair styled in a way they'd never have been caught dead with it in public.
That saying makes more sense to me now..
And it's strange. A dead body is the same thing as when they were alive, but you see.. there's no glow, no soul. Makes me think.
It really is crazy how life can instantly leave a body. Kinda hard to think about it when one second it's present and the next it can be snatched right out of you.
-------------------- Same thing happened to me when I played Neil Armstrong in Moonshot. They found me in an alley in Burbank trying to re-enter the earth's atmosphere in an old refrigerator box.
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Jadian
Ninja



Registered: 07/07/05
Posts: 7,404
Loc: The desert
Last seen: 6 years, 1 month
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Re: I saw my first dead body [Re: CherryBom]
#7796752 - 12/24/07 09:54 PM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
CherryBom said: You went to your grandmothers funeral half stoned from the crazy party the night before? Am I reading this right? You should be with your family offering love and support.
I don't know if I have ever heard something so disgustingly disrespectful and ignorant.
I actually have to disagree with this completely. A death should not stop everyone's life in its tracks.
There's been an ever increasing stigma that makes people think if they aren't depressed and somber for a week after someone dies they're an asshole. Whatever happened to celebrating the life of the person you loved, not mourning their death?
I don't want people boo-hooing all over the place at my funeral, I want people to be happy and remember me being happy, because that's how I lived.
-------------------- LNC's official Alaskan stoner
 
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SuperPuma
Automation Nut



Registered: 11/06/07
Posts: 97
Last seen: 5 years, 7 months
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I did several years of med school.
Its a very complicated head-space to be in. On one hand, you're given cadavers to slice up every day, so they're literally just chunks of flesh for you to cut up, tear apart, and saw into. You learn, and you also learn to disassociate.
Then you go to the ER overnight, and you see people at their most vulnerable, on the fence. People. Or in intensive care or oncology, and you then see these people make the move from people to...not people.
As two discrete things, they're easily reconciled. Dealing with the transition, and all the transition entails, is a complicated matter.
Its easy to generalize through philosophy, but as in all things, you don't really get to the crux of things until you delve into the details.
The eyes are the most intriguing...its like beyond all reason you still identify a person's eyes with a person.
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Serdal
Stranger



Registered: 09/29/07
Posts: 521
Last seen: 14 years, 3 months
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Re: I saw my first dead body [Re: SuperPuma]
#7799180 - 12/25/07 07:53 PM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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So the guy was on the news. Turns out he come out of a house drunk from a christmas party and started walking on the highway. Some innocent 23 year old girl ran him over. Now she has to live with that on her for the rest of her life. Figures... just another life lost to alcohol.
-------------------- *insert signature here*
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CherryBom
Yoga Gypsy


Registered: 12/26/98
Posts: 11,177
Loc: Ontario
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Re: I saw my first dead body [Re: Serdal]
#7799425 - 12/25/07 09:25 PM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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BrAiN
Art Fag


Registered: 03/01/01
Posts: 6,875
Loc: Chocolate City
Last seen: 2 years, 5 months
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Re: I saw my first dead body [Re: Serdal]
#7799486 - 12/25/07 10:02 PM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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I watched someone drop dead of a heart attack in the mall right in front of me while his wife screamed in horror, trying to keep him up while his limp body slumped downward. My mom ran and grabbed her to try to calm her down while the paramedics did everything they could. The look in the man's eyes as his soul escaped was the most bizarre thing I've ever seen.
I also saw the end of a police shootout on a freeway outside of Baltimore. The "bad guy" was lying dead on the freeway.
I also almost drowned once while surfing. As I dragged myself outta the water I watched paramedics pulling some boogie boarders out of the water that I was surfing next to. Three of them... all unconcious for a long period of time. One of them eventually started coming to... the others... I don't know if they lived or died right there on the beach.
I had a buddy in Baltimore die from too many pills/alcohol. I didn't actually see him die or see the body until the wake, but my other friends who were his roommates found him in his room lying there with a puddle of blood oozing from his head. Frequently I find myself wondering how terrifying it would be to find a roommate and good friend like that.
Seeing that stranger die in the mall was one thing which was striking enough... But I've never had to see a friend die in person. I don't know how I'd be able to handle finding or watching someone die that was close to me.
I've had some friends die and had to see their dead bodies at the wake. One was beaten to death by 12 guys. The makep at the wake looked so weird. ANother buddy did too much acid and ran into the highway and got plowed into by a car. He was so mangled they couldn't have a wake. All my grandparents died within a few years of each other and I saw most of their wakes
... it sucked but everyone else in this post is right. Seeing a dead person is one thing.. no matter how close they are. It definately sucks to see a family member at a wake and it's depressing, but you get to absorb it at a wake.
.. But WATCHING someone die... that's just a whole other level of mindfuck
Edited by BrAiN (12/25/07 10:24 PM)
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BrAiN
Art Fag


Registered: 03/01/01
Posts: 6,875
Loc: Chocolate City
Last seen: 2 years, 5 months
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Re: I saw my first dead body [Re: CherryBom]
#7799514 - 12/25/07 10:16 PM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
CherryBom said: You went to your grandmothers funeral half stoned from the crazy party the night before? Am I reading this right? You should be with your family offering love and support.
I don't know if I have ever heard something so disgustingly disrespectful and ignorant.
That's one of the drawbacks to E. I think Ecstasy can REALLY fuck up your judgement when you do it regularly, especially if you're really insecure. When I was 18-19 I was rebelling hardcore against my family who I felt I had a lot of reasons to be pissed off at. My grandmother died and I went to Hullabloo anyways, missing the wake but making it for the funeral.
Looking back, I realize what a different, confused, depressed person I was back then, 10 years ago. I recognize it as a horrible, horrible thing for me to have done. There was a time where I felt really guilty (and I grew up Catholic so when I feel guilty I REALLY feel guilty)... but I don't feel guilty now as I realize I'm a totally different person now who knows how to appreciates his family regarless of how much we fight. It wasn't long after her death.. when my family discovered I had drug problems.I think my parents understand that I wasn't really in my right mind back then. We never talked about it... I feel a lot better nowadays that I'm off all the hard drugs and I've come to peace with everything.
I don't know what it was at the time which made me miss the wake. Either I was THAT addicted to drugs that I didn't care THAT much, or I was so weak that I couldn't face the pain my family was in, or I was pissed at my family for putting me through emotional hell for certain things from the previous years... or maybe a combination of everything. All I know is that I DID feel something... The day before I left for Canada to go to that party I heard my mom ball out crying when she got the news on the phone. I've never felt anything so gutwrenchingly terrible.
I don't think there's one REAL reason to pin it all on... but I think the Ecstasy really fogged my judgement at the time.
Edited by BrAiN (12/25/07 10:31 PM)
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Iron_Hymen
Shake Hands withBeef



Registered: 02/02/06
Posts: 856
Loc: Mass-of-two-shits
Last seen: 15 years, 11 months
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Re: I saw my first dead body [Re: Serdal]
#7799627 - 12/25/07 11:03 PM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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cars carelessly driving over road kill on christmas day? Damn...
--------------------
 #1 reason organized religion should be done away with. It's a message, and one that is open to speculation. "Pray your own prayers and talk to God on your own.He doesn't want a fucking parrot, and he doesn't want a sheep" GnuBobo:Iron. Hymen. Vitamin. Be Iron, like Hymen, in Vitamin. Iron. Hymen. Vitamin.
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tak
geo's henchman




Registered: 11/20/00
Posts: 3,776
Loc: nowhereland
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Re: I saw my first dead body [Re: Iron_Hymen]
#7800353 - 12/26/07 08:16 AM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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I don't think anyone has the right to say what someone should or should not be doing prior to a funeral.
I've had many loves ones die around me, and a few in my arms. Everyone deals diffrently, and even if their way of dealing is trying to pretend it didn't happen.
I've never went to a party night before a funeral, but I can see it happening, and I see no problem with it.
You still have your life to live, and sometimes when everything in your life is down in the dumps and people are sad and engulfing you in these dark feelings...you just need to get away from all that and let loose. He still showed up, payed his respects, and did what he had to do.
You gotta take care of #1 first, and if you can do that and still fufill your obligations to your family then respect to you. I see nothing wrong with this.
-------------------- The DJ's took pills to stay awake and play for seven days.
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MOTH
Wild Woman


Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
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Re: I saw my first dead body [Re: tak]
#7800386 - 12/26/07 08:45 AM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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Ram Dass took LSD at his mother's funeral.
I respect that. He works with the dying, so it seems natural. He said he had a hard time not beaming with happiness for her at such a depressive event.
I've seen one person lay dying in my life, choking on blood. It was amazing. And horrifying. Life changing. My outlook on death has never been the same since.
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idiotek


Registered: 02/06/04
Posts: 40,728
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Re: I saw my first dead body [Re: MOTH]
#7800388 - 12/26/07 08:49 AM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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Can't imagine witnessing someone die, rather than happening upon a lifeless body. Since the time I found my girlfriend's father, I've found it much easier to deal with the idea of being around a corpse.
A lifeless body is not a person, but rather a shell, etc. We've all heard it - but until you actually experience the difference first-hand it's impossible to fathom.
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