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tak
geo's henchman




Registered: 11/20/00
Posts: 3,776
Loc: nowhereland
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Sometimes life is just fucking hard
#7776887 - 12/19/07 09:25 AM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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Sorry for another post, but damn I don't know what else to do. I consider myself to be a pretty strong person, but these days I feel like I'm going to explode.
I posted recently about my 4 year break up, but I also got fired from my job for failing a piss test, the market is doing really bad so I wont be able to find another job doing what I was doing...I have been on the hunt for a job for a couple weeks now, and other than what I used to do, I have no skills. I wanted to get a job in a resturant, but in all honesty, I have bills to pay and it feels like I will never make it in this world.
I moved back home with my mom, but I'm still paying her rent. She was diagnosed with lung cancer last year, and a few weeks ago they found cancer in her brain and are treating her for that now.
I honestly don't know what to do. I have put my whole heart and soul into a relationship and when I need help the most its no where to be found.
I'm pretty fucked up these days, and I dont know what the fuck to do.
I just want to curl up into a ball and cry but that doesn't pay the fucking bills.
-------------------- The DJ's took pills to stay awake and play for seven days.
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tak
geo's henchman




Registered: 11/20/00
Posts: 3,776
Loc: nowhereland
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Re: Sometimes life is just fucking hard [Re: tak]
#7776904 - 12/19/07 09:33 AM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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I feel like an asshole complaining, because my problems arn't shit compared to some peoples...but I dont know what to do...I feel like im gonna blow up on someone in a minute
-------------------- The DJ's took pills to stay awake and play for seven days.
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BrAiN
Art Fag


Registered: 03/01/01
Posts: 6,875
Loc: Chocolate City
Last seen: 2 years, 5 months
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Re: Sometimes life is just fucking hard [Re: tak]
#7776909 - 12/19/07 09:34 AM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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Up until I got to the part about your mom I was gonna' say fuck it.. pack your shit and bum around san diego.
When I was about to explode years ago I quit my job, packed as much shit into my car as I could and moved to LA.. ended up in Huntington Beach. Sometimes, pulling off a big change can keep your mind occupied.
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tak
geo's henchman




Registered: 11/20/00
Posts: 3,776
Loc: nowhereland
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Re: Sometimes life is just fucking hard [Re: BrAiN]
#7776918 - 12/19/07 09:39 AM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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I've really been considering it man, I dont have any real friends here -- I have tons of friends in california and a job lined up.
I just would feel horrible leaving my mom at such a bad time for her, and I don't want to regret it.
-------------------- The DJ's took pills to stay awake and play for seven days.
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BrAiN
Art Fag


Registered: 03/01/01
Posts: 6,875
Loc: Chocolate City
Last seen: 2 years, 5 months
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Re: Sometimes life is just fucking hard [Re: tak]
#7776938 - 12/19/07 09:43 AM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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You can't take your mom with ya?
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trendal
J♠



Registered: 04/17/01
Posts: 20,815
Loc: Ontario, Canada
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Re: Sometimes life is just fucking hard [Re: tak]
#7776968 - 12/19/07 09:54 AM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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Try having a stroke...almost dieing...being paralyzed on one side...having to learn how to walk again...to eat by yourself...get dressed by yourself...do anything you used to by yourself.
Then come back here and, with justification, say life sucks.
Except you won't...because then you'll see that Life is just a game. You play it, and play it as hard as you can, until you see it for what it is.
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Once, men turned their thinking over to machines in the hope that this would set them free. But that only permitted other men with machines to enslave them.
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BrAiN
Art Fag


Registered: 03/01/01
Posts: 6,875
Loc: Chocolate City
Last seen: 2 years, 5 months
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Re: Sometimes life is just fucking hard [Re: trendal]
#7776981 - 12/19/07 10:00 AM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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Damn.. don't belittle the guy. Having your mom diagnosed with lung cancer and losing your job all at once is definately a hard time.
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trendal
J♠



Registered: 04/17/01
Posts: 20,815
Loc: Ontario, Canada
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Re: Sometimes life is just fucking hard [Re: BrAiN]
#7776997 - 12/19/07 10:05 AM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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It was not my intent to belittle! If I came across that way, I am sorry!
My intent was to try and cheer him up a little, by giving a personal anecdote of hardship.
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Once, men turned their thinking over to machines in the hope that this would set them free. But that only permitted other men with machines to enslave them.
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BrAiN
Art Fag


Registered: 03/01/01
Posts: 6,875
Loc: Chocolate City
Last seen: 2 years, 5 months
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Re: Sometimes life is just fucking hard [Re: trendal]
#7777002 - 12/19/07 10:07 AM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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damn! SO all that shit really happened to ya eh? You had a stroke? How old are you?
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trendal
J♠



Registered: 04/17/01
Posts: 20,815
Loc: Ontario, Canada
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Re: Sometimes life is just fucking hard [Re: BrAiN]
#7777020 - 12/19/07 10:10 AM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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Almost 27, and yeah, all that did happen to me
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Once, men turned their thinking over to machines in the hope that this would set them free. But that only permitted other men with machines to enslave them.
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tak
geo's henchman




Registered: 11/20/00
Posts: 3,776
Loc: nowhereland
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Re: Sometimes life is just fucking hard [Re: trendal]
#7777046 - 12/19/07 10:15 AM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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Hey man, if it was anyone else i might be offended.
I'm trying to set myself into a better mood but its hard, these things come in waves...but im generally a happy optimistic person...I just feel like everyone in my life has betrayed me.
I understand that its a rollercoaster, there will be ups and downs...and that im a big boy and its a tough world -- eat or be eaten.
I just feel pretty alone, probably for the first time in my life. All those people that I've bent over backwards for dont want anything to do with me if I dont have money, or live close, or whatever.
I guess in the end I'll have learned an important lesson, but damn. Its just tough.
I appreciate the time for you to write back, I know my issues are not that big, but sometimes I think you guys are the only ones I have. I've gone through alot in my short life so far, and for over 1/3 of it, you guys have been here for me.
It's nice to know someones listening i guess.
-------------------- The DJ's took pills to stay awake and play for seven days.
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trendal
J♠



Registered: 04/17/01
Posts: 20,815
Loc: Ontario, Canada
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Re: Sometimes life is just fucking hard [Re: tak]
#7777067 - 12/19/07 10:21 AM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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We're always here for ya 
I know it doesn't seem like it from this side, but you will learn something from this. You will be a stronger person for having been through it!
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Once, men turned their thinking over to machines in the hope that this would set them free. But that only permitted other men with machines to enslave them.
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RandalFlagg
Stranger

Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: Sometimes life is just fucking hard [Re: tak]
#7777219 - 12/19/07 11:01 AM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
root-ninja-tak said: Sorry for another post, but damn I don't know what else to do. I consider myself to be a pretty strong person, but these days I feel like I'm going to explode.
I posted recently about my 4 year break up, but I also got fired from my job for failing a piss test, the market is doing really bad so I wont be able to find another job doing what I was doing...I have been on the hunt for a job for a couple weeks now, and other than what I used to do, I have no skills. I wanted to get a job in a resturant, but in all honesty, I have bills to pay and it feels like I will never make it in this world.
I moved back home with my mom, but I'm still paying her rent. She was diagnosed with lung cancer last year, and a few weeks ago they found cancer in her brain and are treating her for that now.
I honestly don't know what to do. I have put my whole heart and soul into a relationship and when I need help the most its no where to be found.
I'm pretty fucked up these days, and I dont know what the fuck to do.
I just want to curl up into a ball and cry but that doesn't pay the fucking bills.
Damn man. Your problems are pretty severe. I bitch and moan about my problems which pale in comparison to yours. You have every right to vent and whine.
Good luck.
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ZippoZ
Knomadic



Registered: 06/17/03
Posts: 13,227
Loc: Pongyang, North Korea
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Re: Sometimes life is just fucking hard [Re: trendal]
#7777224 - 12/19/07 11:04 AM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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yhe sad reality is that this life is filled with kittle pockets of hardship, saddness and despair. much love and best of luck to your mom
-------------------- PEACE
zippoz "in times of widespread chaos and confusion, it has been the duty of more advanced human beings - artists, scientists, clowns, and philosophers - to create order. In such times as ours however, when there is too much order, too much m management, too much programming and control, it becomes the duty of superior men and women and women to fling their favorite monkey wrenches into the machinery. To relieve the repression of the human spirit, they must sow doubt and disruption" "People do it every day, they talk to themselves ... they see themselves as they'd like to be, they don't have the courage you have, to just run with it."
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WhiskeyClone
Not here


Registered: 06/25/01
Posts: 16,509
Loc: Longitudinal Center of Canada ...
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Re: Sometimes life is just fucking hard [Re: tak]
#7777421 - 12/19/07 12:05 PM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
root-ninja-tak said:
I'm trying to set myself into a better mood but its hard, these things come in waves...
Ah, hard times...
Here's what I've learned about moods:
-They are not caused by your circumstances; they are cause by the way you think about your circumstances -Good or bad, they never last -Bad moods make your circumstances appear much worse than they are -Blaming yourself or others for your circumstances makes bad moods worse, and changes nothing else -Wishing things were different makes bad moods worse -Doing something positive makes your mood better, but not until you've done it
You can't force your way out of a bad mood; it's okay to be in a bad mood for a while, give yourself permission to feel like shit for a while. Every day ordinary people deal with even more difficult situations. The only thing that can make it impossible is to cry foul and throw up your hands.
Quote:
I just feel like everyone in my life has betrayed me.
Be careful here. Maybe they have, maybe they haven't, but as long as you tell yourself others are responsible for your situation, your life is gonna suck. Whoever's fault it is, it's your problem. You can run but you can't hide.
You'll deal, man. People have an amazing ability to do that.
-------------------- Welcome evermore to gods and men is the self-helping man. For him all doors are flung wide: him all tongues greet, all honors crown, all eyes follow with desire. Our love goes out to him and embraces him, because he did not need it. ~ R.W. Emerson, "Self-Reliance"
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BrAiN
Art Fag


Registered: 03/01/01
Posts: 6,875
Loc: Chocolate City
Last seen: 2 years, 5 months
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Re: Sometimes life is just fucking hard [Re: WhiskeyClone]
#7780044 - 12/20/07 12:13 AM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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I've been through some serious downwaves when I was younger. I'm 28 now. When I was 11 I moved from what I thought was a paradise to a kinda rough town in the DC burbs. After that it was a lot of ups and downs for 10+ years.
Which is funny because now, no matter how stressed I get, I'm always content with life.
After being really really depressed for so long... you eventually get to a certain point where you realize that you only get one shot at life. You might as well find something you're passionate about and go all out to achieve some sort of goal rather than to let the negative stuff control you and shut you down.
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