|
Diploid
Cuban
Registered: 01/09/03
Posts: 19,274
Loc: Rabbit Hole
|
Ahaha! Geek Humor!
#7767746 - 12/16/07 10:26 PM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
|
|
A math limerick:
( (12 + 144 + 20 + 3 Sqrt[4]) / 7 ) + 5*11 = 81 + 0
A dozen, a gross, and a score, plus three times the square root of four, divided by seven, plus five times eleven, is nine squared and not a bit more.
-------------------- Republican Values: 1) You can't get married to your spouse who is the same sex as you. 2) You can't have an abortion no matter how much you don't want a child. 3) You can't have a certain plant in your possession or you'll get locked up with a rapist and a murderer. 4) We need a smaller, less-intrusive government.
|
Seuss
Error: divide byzero
Registered: 04/27/01
Posts: 23,480
Loc: Caribbean
Last seen: 1 month, 9 days
|
Re: Ahaha! Geek Humor! [Re: Diploid]
#7768313 - 12/17/07 04:49 AM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
|
|
Heh... cute.
-------------------- Just another spore in the wind.
|
Legend9123
Registered: 09/24/06
Posts: 2,590
Last seen: 10 months, 1 day
|
Re: Ahaha! Geek Humor! [Re: Diploid]
#7768546 - 12/17/07 08:35 AM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
|
|
You are way too easily amused.
-------------------- Those who would give up a little freedom to get a little security shall soon have neither. -Benjamin Franklin
|
maggotz
Registered: 06/24/06
Posts: 7,539
|
Re: Ahaha! Geek Humor! [Re: Diploid]
#7773164 - 12/18/07 09:34 AM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
|
|
|
DieCommie
Registered: 12/11/03
Posts: 29,258
|
Re: Ahaha! Geek Humor! [Re: maggotz]
#7773385 - 12/18/07 10:59 AM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
|
|
Have you seen this one?
Integral t squared dt, from one to the cube root of three, times the cosine, of three pi over nine, is ln of the cube root of e
Funny, you can see where they add shit in that equation to make it work. I envision, if I am ever a math teacher, putting this on as a bonus question: Express this as a limerick...
Haha, I think that would be a funny math problem.
|
Diploid
Cuban
Registered: 01/09/03
Posts: 19,274
Loc: Rabbit Hole
|
Re: Ahaha! Geek Humor! [Re: DieCommie]
#7773909 - 12/18/07 01:50 PM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
|
|
I envision, if I am ever a math teacher, putting this on as a bonus question: Express this as a limerick...
Ahaha... that would be a funny math test. Here are some more:
--
Ever notice how sexual Unix is?
common Unix commands:
* talk, date, join, head, tail, split * unzip; strip; touch; finger; mount; fsck; more; yes; umount; zip; sleep
--
Real Programmers always confuse Christmas and Halloween because OCT 31 == DEC 25
--
Q: What's a polar bear? A: A rectangular bear after a coordinate transform.
--
Q. Have you heared they are developing an Object Oriented version of COBOL? A. It's called "ADD 1 TO COBOL"
Ahahaha! OO COBOL!
-------------------- Republican Values: 1) You can't get married to your spouse who is the same sex as you. 2) You can't have an abortion no matter how much you don't want a child. 3) You can't have a certain plant in your possession or you'll get locked up with a rapist and a murderer. 4) We need a smaller, less-intrusive government.
|
Boom
just a tester
Registered: 06/16/04
Posts: 11,252
Loc: Cypress Creek
|
Re: Ahaha! Geek Humor! [Re: Diploid]
#7773925 - 12/18/07 01:58 PM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
|
|
|
automan
blasted chipmunk
Registered: 09/18/03
Posts: 8,272
|
Re: Ahaha! Geek Humor! [Re: Boom]
#7774777 - 12/18/07 06:01 PM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
|
|
-------------------- No, no, you're not thinking, you're just being logical. ~ Niels Bohr
Edited by automan (12/19/07 05:37 AM)
|
maggotz
Registered: 06/24/06
Posts: 7,539
|
Re: Ahaha! Geek Humor! [Re: automan]
#7775834 - 12/18/07 10:23 PM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
|
|
Quote:
Q: What's a polar bear? A: A rectangular bear after a coordinate transform.
|
Madtowntripper
Sun-Beams out of Cucumbers
Registered: 03/06/03
Posts: 21,287
Loc: The Ocean of Notions
Last seen: 7 months, 11 days
|
Re: Ahaha! Geek Humor! [Re: maggotz]
#7803883 - 12/27/07 12:38 PM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
|
|
So the Physicist Dr. Werner Heisenberg was driving down the street one day to his laboratory when he suddenly noticed the flashing lights of a police car in his rear-view mirror. He quickly pulled over to the side of the road and rolled down his window as the cop apprached his car.
"Dr. Heisenberg", the officer said as he saw the driver, "I'm afraid you were speeding on that stretch of road back there. Do you know just how fast you were moving?"
"No!", said Dr. Heisenberg proudly, "But I know where I am."
-------------------- After one comes, through contact with it's administrators, no longer to cherish greatly the law as a remedy in abuses, then the bottle becomes a sovereign means of direct action. If you cannot throw it at least you can always drink out of it. - Ernest Hemingway If it is life that you feel you are missing I can tell you where to find it. In the law courts, in business, in government. There is nothing occurring in the streets. Nothing but a dumbshow composed of the helpless and the impotent. -Cormac MacCarthy He who learns must suffer. And even in our sleep pain that cannot forget falls drop by drop upon the heart, and in our own despair, against our will, comes wisdom to us by the awful grace of God. - Aeschylus
|
Diploid
Cuban
Registered: 01/09/03
Posts: 19,274
Loc: Rabbit Hole
|
|
Descartes walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Would you like a drink?" Descartes says, "I think not" and promptly disappears.
-------------------- Republican Values: 1) You can't get married to your spouse who is the same sex as you. 2) You can't have an abortion no matter how much you don't want a child. 3) You can't have a certain plant in your possession or you'll get locked up with a rapist and a murderer. 4) We need a smaller, less-intrusive government.
|
Seuss
Error: divide byzero
Registered: 04/27/01
Posts: 23,480
Loc: Caribbean
Last seen: 1 month, 9 days
|
Re: Ahaha! Geek Humor! [Re: Diploid]
#7804352 - 12/27/07 02:56 PM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
|
|
Chris Knight from the movie Real Genius: I was thinking of the immortal words of Socrates, who said, "I drank what?"
-------------------- Just another spore in the wind.
|
Silversoul
Rhizome
Registered: 01/01/05
Posts: 23,576
Loc: The Barricades
|
Re: Ahaha! Geek Humor! [Re: Diploid]
#7804356 - 12/27/07 02:57 PM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
|
|
From Futurama:
Announcer: "And the first horse wins by a quantum measure."
Prof. Farnsworth: "No fair! You changed the outcome by measuring it."
--------------------
|
Diploid
Cuban
Registered: 01/09/03
Posts: 19,274
Loc: Rabbit Hole
|
Re: Ahaha! Geek Humor! [Re: Diploid]
#7834566 - 01/05/08 06:03 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
|
|
I got another one:
Important mathematical identities:
1. Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter = Eskimo Pi 2. 2000 pounds of Chinese soup = Won ton 3. 1 millionth of a mouthwash = 1 microscope 4. Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement = 1 bananosecond 5. Weight an evangelist carries with God = 1 billigram 6. Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour = Knotfurlong 7. 16.5 feet of silver in the Twilight Zone = 1 Rod Sterling 8. Half of a large intestine = 1 semicolon 9. 1,000,000 aches = 1 megahurtz 10. Basic unit of laryngitis = 1 hoarsepower 11. Shortest distance between two jokes = A straight line 12. 453.6 graham crackers = 1 pound cake 13. 1 million microphones = 1 megaphone 14. 1 million bicycles = 2 megacycles 15. 365.25 days = 1 unicycle 16. 2000 mockingbirds = 2 kilomockingbird 17. 52 cards = 1 decacards 18. 1000 kilograms of falling figs = 1 FigNewton 19. 1000 milliliters of wet socks = 1 literhosen 20. 1 millionth of a fish = 1 microfiche 21. 1 trillion pins = 1 terrapin 22. 10 rations = 1 decoration 23. 100 rations = 1 C-ration 24. 2 monograms = 1 diagram 25. 8 nickels = 2 paradigms 26. 4 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University Hospital = 1 IV League 27. 100 Senators = Not 1 decision
-------------------- Republican Values: 1) You can't get married to your spouse who is the same sex as you. 2) You can't have an abortion no matter how much you don't want a child. 3) You can't have a certain plant in your possession or you'll get locked up with a rapist and a murderer. 4) We need a smaller, less-intrusive government.
|
Asante
Omnicyclion prophet
Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 87,230
|
Re: Ahaha! Geek Humor! [Re: Diploid]
#7834671 - 01/05/08 07:37 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
|
|
-------------------- Omnicyclion.org higher knowledge starts here
|
BrAiN
Art Fag
Registered: 03/01/01
Posts: 6,875
Loc: Chocolate City
Last seen: 2 years, 6 months
|
Re: Ahaha! Geek Humor! [Re: Asante]
#7834999 - 01/05/08 10:44 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
|
|
Hah I see that one now...
I hate Verizon, but they're the only ones that can give me a non internet-based landline... god damnit
|
Madtowntripper
Sun-Beams out of Cucumbers
Registered: 03/06/03
Posts: 21,287
Loc: The Ocean of Notions
Last seen: 7 months, 11 days
|
Re: Ahaha! Geek Humor! [Re: BrAiN]
#7836384 - 01/05/08 04:35 PM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
|
|
I've been through most of the phone companies out there, and I have Verizon currently. They're the only ones that haven't screwed me royally at the first opportunity.
We did have a slight disagreement about some data usage charges, but I think it was an honest misunderstanding...
-------------------- After one comes, through contact with it's administrators, no longer to cherish greatly the law as a remedy in abuses, then the bottle becomes a sovereign means of direct action. If you cannot throw it at least you can always drink out of it. - Ernest Hemingway If it is life that you feel you are missing I can tell you where to find it. In the law courts, in business, in government. There is nothing occurring in the streets. Nothing but a dumbshow composed of the helpless and the impotent. -Cormac MacCarthy He who learns must suffer. And even in our sleep pain that cannot forget falls drop by drop upon the heart, and in our own despair, against our will, comes wisdom to us by the awful grace of God. - Aeschylus
|
Madtowntripper
Sun-Beams out of Cucumbers
Registered: 03/06/03
Posts: 21,287
Loc: The Ocean of Notions
Last seen: 7 months, 11 days
|
|
-------------------- After one comes, through contact with it's administrators, no longer to cherish greatly the law as a remedy in abuses, then the bottle becomes a sovereign means of direct action. If you cannot throw it at least you can always drink out of it. - Ernest Hemingway If it is life that you feel you are missing I can tell you where to find it. In the law courts, in business, in government. There is nothing occurring in the streets. Nothing but a dumbshow composed of the helpless and the impotent. -Cormac MacCarthy He who learns must suffer. And even in our sleep pain that cannot forget falls drop by drop upon the heart, and in our own despair, against our will, comes wisdom to us by the awful grace of God. - Aeschylus
|
BrAiN
Art Fag
Registered: 03/01/01
Posts: 6,875
Loc: Chocolate City
Last seen: 2 years, 6 months
|
|
Quote:
Madtowntripper said: I've been through most of the phone companies out there, and I have Verizon currently. They're the only ones that haven't screwed me royally at the first opportunity.
We did have a slight disagreement about some data usage charges, but I think it was an honest misunderstanding...
Verison's good for landlines... I have to admit
But their tech support and their web site (for customer functions) sucks balls
You're fine with Gurbizon as long as nothing goes wrong
|
Madtowntripper
Sun-Beams out of Cucumbers
Registered: 03/06/03
Posts: 21,287
Loc: The Ocean of Notions
Last seen: 7 months, 11 days
|
Re: Ahaha! Geek Humor! [Re: BrAiN]
#7942825 - 01/27/08 09:28 PM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
|
|
Not liking quantum box kitty?
-------------------- After one comes, through contact with it's administrators, no longer to cherish greatly the law as a remedy in abuses, then the bottle becomes a sovereign means of direct action. If you cannot throw it at least you can always drink out of it. - Ernest Hemingway If it is life that you feel you are missing I can tell you where to find it. In the law courts, in business, in government. There is nothing occurring in the streets. Nothing but a dumbshow composed of the helpless and the impotent. -Cormac MacCarthy He who learns must suffer. And even in our sleep pain that cannot forget falls drop by drop upon the heart, and in our own despair, against our will, comes wisdom to us by the awful grace of God. - Aeschylus
|
BrAiN
Art Fag
Registered: 03/01/01
Posts: 6,875
Loc: Chocolate City
Last seen: 2 years, 6 months
|
|
too drunk to appreciate the humor
I've had many a gin and juices tonight
|
Madtowntripper
Sun-Beams out of Cucumbers
Registered: 03/06/03
Posts: 21,287
Loc: The Ocean of Notions
Last seen: 7 months, 11 days
|
Re: Ahaha! Geek Humor! [Re: BrAiN]
#7942990 - 01/27/08 09:54 PM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
|
|
try a gin and sprite sometime.
Its my personal favorite...
-------------------- After one comes, through contact with it's administrators, no longer to cherish greatly the law as a remedy in abuses, then the bottle becomes a sovereign means of direct action. If you cannot throw it at least you can always drink out of it. - Ernest Hemingway If it is life that you feel you are missing I can tell you where to find it. In the law courts, in business, in government. There is nothing occurring in the streets. Nothing but a dumbshow composed of the helpless and the impotent. -Cormac MacCarthy He who learns must suffer. And even in our sleep pain that cannot forget falls drop by drop upon the heart, and in our own despair, against our will, comes wisdom to us by the awful grace of God. - Aeschylus
|
BrAiN
Art Fag
Registered: 03/01/01
Posts: 6,875
Loc: Chocolate City
Last seen: 2 years, 6 months
|
|
I make these half mojitos half gin and tonics.. they'll knock u on your ass.
Take a bunch of mint leaves and grind them with some sugar like you normally do... squeeze in 4 small limes (or 2 big ones). throw in a coulpe shots of gin, ice, and top off with tonic water.
Shazaaam.... tastes like candy and by the time you're done you'll see pink elephants.
I call them.. Mo-B-toes... B being what my friends call me
|
Seuss
Error: divide byzero
Registered: 04/27/01
Posts: 23,480
Loc: Caribbean
Last seen: 1 month, 9 days
|
Re: Ahaha! Geek Humor! [Re: BrAiN]
#7944796 - 01/28/08 11:10 AM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
|
|
Quote:
Take a bunch of mint leaves and grind them with some sugar like you normally do... squeeze in 4 small limes (or 2 big ones). throw in a coulpe shots of gin, ice, and top off with tonic water.
Same thing down here, but with rum instead of gin. You can also use Tequila, and replace tonic with more lime juice.
I love the quantum cat poster... Still laughing over that one. Currently my favorite post in this thread.
|
PhanTomCat
Teh Cat....
Registered: 09/07/04
Posts: 5,908
Loc: My Youniverse....
Last seen: 15 years, 30 days
|
|
There is only a Phantom in the box..... And a Twinkie....
>^;;^<
-------------------- I'll be your midnight French Fry.... "The most important things in life that are often ignored, are the things that one cannot see...." >^;;^<
|
|