I've used psychedelics to murder a lot of my urge to want. I use the word murder, because I want to get my own inner blossom of want down to a gasping hobo on life support...I think the presence of want may still be necessary, in the realms of moderation and to laugh at. It is easier to laugh at something that is there, methinks. In this case, a Hobo on life support. Pretty funny, if ya think about (How the hell could a Hobo even AFFORD life support in this day and age?!) Anyway, I didn't want to digress, but alas I have, and maybe a laugh came out of it.
Anyway, I look at my mind as a "geodesic dome" (The dome style constructed by Buckminster Fuller, composed out of triangles; The strongest shape possible, in my experiences) Each thought linked to each other, supporting each other, etc, etc. All the benefits and strengths of a dome, applied to your mind. The thing is, I was only to build this dome after removing many unnecessary parts! Want, Anger, Depression, indecisiveness; Generally anything that is more difficult to control without garnering a negative result; I'd be a liar to say I didn't feel all these things from time to time, but they are really just dust particles in my dome, there to be swept away.
Before, I'd tell you my mind was a box, and Jesus Mohamed Buddha God it was dirty. So much junk what I'd consider crap. The reason why I'd call it crap, is because in my mind I was holding the FORM rather than the source of the form. "Holding the source of the form" is way more efficient: It is formless (and therefore space less, but paradoxically existent) up until the point of reference where it manifests itself. Isn't using a "line of coding" to construct the thought, rather than "wanting to have the thought" more efficient? This would mean the particular triangle that "represents said piece of information" is like a window, I can look through, or into. It might be a metaphor to say" "Extraction tek for mushrooms is here" or something more abstract. Damned if I'm gonna waste space in my geodesic head, when I can take up .25 the amount of space using a "cookie" to make a computer analogy.
I also think it is funny, in a way, how anagalous our brains are compared to computers. The possibilities of meta programming, software installation, defragging, and other examples I have heard applied to how the brain helps operate the mind. Regardless of this metaphor has a one to one ratio of truthfulness when comparing the two, I think its main purpose is to help put things in perspective, to help objectify, and make modifications from that point. My metaphor (which would technically be a metaphor FOR a metaphor) is Dungeons and Dragons. I know that game better then most people, and see it differently than most people. I am able to use it to provide context for nearly all shit in life that is thrown at you. Either way, Computer or D&D, you'll notice that the best running of either are simplified to the point of efficiency...bogged down computers run shitty and so do D&D games. I've used and played both.
Removing want is like adjusting the amount of energy your brain CAN run off of, while producing all the same effects, and I also think this actually ends up being Dymaxion; The less you want the MORE you will be offered. Ram Dass mentions something similar, and this is certainly a concept that lies in Dymaxion principles (more for less) pioneered by B. Fuller. Now don't get me wrong: I don't claim to be a guru (except for maybe leading your characters through a wicked dungeon and planet) for I do want some things. I want to take Acid today, I want a new guitar, I want to be around friends, however wanting things to me now is a lot like "looking for synchronicities"---I might feel like I wanted it, but in reality I always had it, however had the source of the form. Sometimes the form is "late" in manifesting itself. And that is want to me now: Trying to get a better picture of what you "computer" already had; studying the computer itself. I make mistakes for it is a very complex, all too human, and simultaneous all to alien Computer. or Elven.
My point is, I suppose is removing want is like removing all the flashy packaging your computer came in, removing all the stock games, and programs without personal context (subjective relativity) It allows you to take a divine structure and alter it, for we are inherently divine and mystical. Also, doesn't anyone think where ever or whoever produces our hardware and stock software our very weird, wondrous things? It is like I look at the label of my PC of the mind, and It is written in some indescribable, all too real language. Music also has a LOT to do with how the PC operates, because whenever I look at the manufacturing label, it is the fearful unknown, but in the same way you wait for the next note in a favorite song. I'm purty sure at least.
In a way, I am contesting those who use psychedelics to heavily pay attention to their visuals. For once, ignore all the bullshit you've ever heard about visuals, and just take them in. See if you can apply things you see to the thoughts in your head, no matter HOW abstract. Try to see if you have a dome, box, onion, even a Kermit the Frog Penis, for all ya'll weird mother fuckers. The point really isn't if whether the Visuals ARE your cognition manifested, the point is pretend it is, and see what you can do with it. I have pretended that, and found in my world it was all to real. Lucky science doesn't have an instrument to measure subjectivity, or else I may be hit. All I know, is on a light dose of mushies or LSD (.9 grams, 1 hit of my average blotter I get) will produce the wildest of visuals, geometrics feelings, and abstract and neo-logical thought waves. This is all maybe because of pretending. Like I said, real or not it worked for me so it must be real. Now I feel my mind is waaay more effiecient, thus leaving more time for fun. I WANT to have fun.
I have Tri-Force names!
--------------------
"I'm looking at you looking at it" SUBSCRIBE TO MY YOUTUBE CHANNEL PLEASE! www.youtube.com/apollyphelion Creator of the World's Worst Comic Book
|