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dsquaredccubed
age askyew
Registered: 12/08/07
Posts: 26
Last seen: 16 years, 1 month
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diussociation is a fun form of escape, cant seem to make it stick pre death yet, will try again though. maybe we'll see each other in the aether.. sometimes I pop up behind peoples ears as a gnome, othertimes a n astral body in dreams, shit ill sit on the couch next to you while you spliffin g
-------------------- cuwn1cu "You, Lynard Skinnard-hat and Me, little kitty Sat across with a velvet jacket Wild orange hair and dark, dark eyes I gawked like a twelve-year-old - smitten Carla the stripper, straight from L.A. You seem cool for a naked chick in a booth Let's be pals some day In other words,..
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery



Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 95,368
Loc: underbelly
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It's a secret forum and you aren't invited. Sorry.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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dsquaredccubed
age askyew
Registered: 12/08/07
Posts: 26
Last seen: 16 years, 1 month
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Re: Numbness in my soul? [Re: Icelander]
#7732269 - 12/08/07 08:46 AM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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word to wire mother
-------------------- cuwn1cu "You, Lynard Skinnard-hat and Me, little kitty Sat across with a velvet jacket Wild orange hair and dark, dark eyes I gawked like a twelve-year-old - smitten Carla the stripper, straight from L.A. You seem cool for a naked chick in a booth Let's be pals some day In other words,..
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mushroomplume
Stranger

Registered: 10/16/06
Posts: 1,395
Last seen: 14 years, 19 days
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Re: Numbness in my soul? [Re: Icelander]
#7732295 - 12/08/07 08:59 AM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Icelander said: It's a secret forum and you aren't invited. Sorry.
FUCK
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dsquaredccubed
age askyew
Registered: 12/08/07
Posts: 26
Last seen: 16 years, 1 month
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shit the club imof even allow z gerbils with batteries for brains to have the floor, elitist efreetism jah still byearning
-------------------- cuwn1cu "You, Lynard Skinnard-hat and Me, little kitty Sat across with a velvet jacket Wild orange hair and dark, dark eyes I gawked like a twelve-year-old - smitten Carla the stripper, straight from L.A. You seem cool for a naked chick in a booth Let's be pals some day In other words,..
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mushroomplume
Stranger

Registered: 10/16/06
Posts: 1,395
Last seen: 14 years, 19 days
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Quote:
dsquaredccubed said: shit the club imof even allow z gerbils with batteries for brains to have the floor, elitist efreetism jah still byearning
I guess I'm not the only one who eats paint thinner around here.
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery



Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 95,368
Loc: underbelly
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Yeah, but you can handle it.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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MarkostheGnostic
Elder


Registered: 12/09/99
Posts: 14,279
Loc: South Florida
Last seen: 3 years, 2 days
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"I am not really looking for anything just curious about the lifestyle I live and the experience of others who share it."
Oh, you mean the lifestyle of a drug addict/alcoholic? How about these descriptors?: Dysfunctional, pathological, manipulative, emotionally stunted, parasitical, criminal, irresponsible, narcissistic, selfish, spiritually unawakened and dangerous to self and others (particularly if one drives). When did you ever come to regard mental illness, self-imposed as addiction is, to be a "lifestyle"? If anything it is a 'deathstyle.'
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elbisivni
Registered: 10/01/06
Posts: 2,839
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Quote:
oliveplume said:
Quote:
dsquaredccubed said: shit the club imof even allow z gerbils with batteries for brains to have the floor, elitist efreetism jah still byearning
I guess I'm not the only one who eats paint thinner around here.

Quote:
Icelander said: Yeah, but you can handle it.
-------------------- From dust you are made and to dust you shall return.
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery



Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 95,368
Loc: underbelly
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Quote:
MarkostheGnostic said: "I am not really looking for anything just curious about the lifestyle I live and the experience of others who share it."
Oh, you mean the lifestyle of a drug addict/alcoholic? How about these descriptors?: Dysfunctional, pathological, manipulative, emotionally stunted, parasitical, criminal, irresponsible, narcissistic, selfish, spiritually unawakened and dangerous to self and others (particularly if one drives). When did you ever come to regard mental illness, self-imposed as addiction is, to be a "lifestyle"? If anything it is a 'deathstyle.'
Ouch.
Well It seems to be the western lifestyle to a great extent.:(
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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NiamhNyx
I'm NOT a 'he'


Registered: 09/01/02
Posts: 3,198
Last seen: 14 years, 8 months
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Quote:
Walter1496211 said: I just have to say that I have seen many therapists and nothing can compare to the reality that the shroomery members provide. Its really hard to find people who tell you how it is and don't add sugar there is something to be said for this community
I'm glad you took my terribly blunt advice so well. These days I'm running with the 'tough love' tell-it-how-it-is approach and it seems to be a good one. The best advice anyone ever gave me was to stop feeling sorry for myself and it's stuck, and has made a major difference in the quality of my emotional life. Good luck with working through things, and don't forget that this forum is always around if you need a reality check or a sympathetic ear. Therapists are great, but they often try and bring you to realizing things for yourself rather than just bluntly telling you whats up. This is not a bad strategy, it just takes a lot more time. Sometimes a kick in the pants is really what a person needs.
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Ozekat
Cosmic Observer



Registered: 11/21/07
Posts: 186
Loc: Kentucky
Last seen: 11 years, 2 months
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Re: Numbness in my soul? [Re: NiamhNyx]
#7737003 - 12/09/07 02:52 PM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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great advice here 
I will numb myself on occasion simply because it is easy and alleviates having to think about anything too deeply. Opiates seem to be a great detour with drastically shitty side effects down the road, not to mention the potential for true addiction.
When I don't want to care I snort a lortab. Actually drinking alcohol for me usually brings to the front and out in the open my underlying emotional troubles. Alcohol is a numbing agent in ways but I find myself under hypnotic spells of depression while under its influence about 70% of the time I actively take it in.
I see it clearly as day, especially when applied to my life. When you want to feel numb or are exacerbating said feelings you're running from yourself and your faults.
Abstinence from drugs and alcohol may be one alternative you haven't considered yet, I don't know. But keeping a clear, vivid mindset will REALLY bring the focus on what certain things in your life that are REALLY fucked up.
Partaking in consciousness-dwindling psychoactives, I believe, does not teach one much of anything in the long run. Psychedelics are a totally different universe, they intensify that which exists and shows through the most elaborate ways all the thousands of different angles to approach problems.
At times these insights can be coupled with fear and anxiety at facing the reality of your ego and overall existence. Even cripplingly so, I have found myself here a number of times.
I think the bad trips teach me more about myself than the good.
-------------------- Tension is who you think you should be. Relaxation is who you are. - Chinese Proverb
Beauty & Simplicity
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krin
Stranger


Registered: 11/20/04
Posts: 370
Last seen: 11 years, 7 months
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Re: Numbness in my soul? [Re: Ozekat]
#7737746 - 12/09/07 06:40 PM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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"I guess I could be running because I feel inadequate and unable to satisfy the needs of others or to succeed in helping them to the fullest. "
It is harder to heal others if you are injured, desperate or exhausted spiritually. You have to nurture some power, either harnessed in belief of self, love of natures true transformations, the relationship there is between conscious bodies, just draw and support and transmit energy, in anything you do. There are no rules except when there is a specifically designated direction/goal to your actions, which is usually bounded in the deepest "center" of your memories and soul. For love, country, success, or just the evasion of inadequate feelings, or the fulfillment of other's expectations, the nature of the energies you bring into fruition, compassionate, mathematical, religious/spiritual will be amplified by the very notion of thier power, that they self-propegate thier beauty if you are true to them. Energy amplifies/complexifies itself through truthful/accurate reactions.
All spirituality revolves around this core of "energetic experiences". To conduct through the vessel of soul the power of the universe. "scientific" formulation,religious revelations, drug experiences, altered states, tragic/traumatic jarring experiences, bring a soul into a vortex of critical and overwhelming energies. These complexs of energy serve as different events or modulators in the ever birthing form of crystalized physical reality, effecting the most outfitted facet of the universe with new pathways of developement of the "universal vibrations of the soul", to reach out with technology, with religious triumph, with counterreactions to destruction.
Edited by krin (12/09/07 06:48 PM)
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blkjkrabbit

Registered: 07/22/07
Posts: 4,971
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Re: Numbness in my soul? [Re: krin]
#7738051 - 12/09/07 08:10 PM (16 years, 1 month ago) |
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good food for thought in this thread...
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