Home | Community | Message Board


This site includes paid links. Please support our sponsors.


Welcome to the Shroomery Message Board! You are experiencing a small sample of what the site has to offer. Please login or register to post messages and view our exclusive members-only content. You'll gain access to additional forums, file attachments, board customizations, encrypted private messages, and much more!

Kraken Kratom Shop: Red Vein Kratom

Jump to first unread post Pages: < Back | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | Next >
Anonymous #93

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #8505783 - 06/09/08 11:53 PM (15 years, 7 months ago)

I spent seven months in the county jail from my fourth dui/drugs (xanax).  I was finally sent to the work release program, which has guys and chicks living in the same building, just not with each other.  there is a guy wing and a girl wing. i got to leave each day to go to work and do my laundry, crap like that.  i met this chick who was also locked up.  we ended up in the same laundrymat one day and started making out.  she told me she had genital herpies.  after 7 months of no action, i didnt really care. we went to the bathroom of the laundry mat and fucked like crazy.  I ate her out then fucked her like a madman.  and ya know what?  she fucking stank.  like seriously needed a douche, but I didnt give a shit.
its been over a year and no herpes for me...never did get tested, so for all i know I have aids.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Anonymous #94

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #25]
    #8505800 - 06/10/08 12:00 AM (15 years, 7 months ago)

sheeps and goats tickle my fancy :mattz:


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Anonymous #95

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #94]
    #8505815 - 06/10/08 12:08 AM (15 years, 7 months ago)

I got engaged to a religious guy who's saving himself for marriage. It's a sexual disaster!

Good thing he's a keener, so he'll probably be good eventually.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Anonymous #93

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #93]
    #8505824 - 06/10/08 12:11 AM (15 years, 7 months ago)

ewwww, marriage in general is the basic definition of "sexual disaster"
I wont go down THAT road again!


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Anonymous #96

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #29]
    #8509401 - 06/10/08 10:52 PM (15 years, 7 months ago)

I was having sex with my high school boyfriend.

It wasn't my first time, but it was like my 5th time or something and this guy wasn't really big enough to break the hymen. So finally we fucked up against the wall and that broke it and I bled.

The guy got totally freaked out and disgusted, like he expected that if he had sex with a 16 year old virgin I wouldn't bleed. He had this look on his face like "OMG, that's completely nasty, I can't believe you just did that" as if I had any control over it. It was HIS dick that made me bleed in the first place.

After that I didn't have sex with him any more because it was obvious he was into getting his rocks off but couldn't cope with the realities of the human body. I've been with guys that don't care if I'm on my period and it's honestly a big red flag if men are scared of a little blood. I understand not wanting to have sex, but being downright SCARED or freaked out by blood? That's really immature.

Most of you are a sexual disaster, imho.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Anonymous #97

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #96]
    #8517105 - 06/12/08 08:22 PM (15 years, 7 months ago)

Several years ago, one afternoon I was fooling around with a girl that I was in a casual relationship with.
She was in the last days of her period, so being self conscious, she wouldn't let me put it in. or even go anywhere near there beneath her panties.
At this point, we had been kissing and dry fucking for a while. It was driving me crazy and I was getting hornier and hornier. I just wanted it soo bad. At the same time, I was in a bind. I was incredibly turned on, but I knew that if we had sex,(we never used condoms) I would've come within minutes..or sooner
So, finally I convinced her that we needed to have sex. It took a lot of convincing, but she finally obliged, but then said she would have to take a shower first.
I thought, great..maybe I'll cool down a little and won't embarass myself. But then, at the same time, I doubted my staying power, and thought, well maybe if I just rub a small one out while she's in the shower, after some more foreplay, I'll just get it back up and then we'll have sex.
So, then I thought times a wastin, gotta get off real quick. Well it wasn't that easy on my own, so I grabbed a pair of her sexy little panties that were on the floor next to the bed and well, it must have turned me on more than expected and I busted a full load across her bedroom floor.
Next thing I knew, the shower stops. shit that was quick! gulp.

Naked and clean, she walks seductively out of the bathroom ready for sex.
And here I am, just came, cleaned up...Trying to play it cool. She jumped into bed with me and I had to act like I still wanted her. I didn't want shit at that moment.
So, we(I, reluctantly) started where we left off.
I had a hard time faking the passion of hooking up with her, But I was doing ok, I think. but then she wanted it right there and then.
Shit! The pressure! now I can't get it up!

So, needless to say, now all of her self conscious fears that she was trying to shower off, came rushing back as she noticed my failure to be turned on.(her possible thoughts-do I smell? does he not find me attractive? are we not into each other anymore?) I could see it in her eyes. Gulp..again.

I was getting smaller and smaller by thinking about trying to get it up. Tugging to no avail. Trying to slip the head in just a little to get the feeling back, maybe that would get it started. But i think at that point would have gone further backwards inside of me than in her.

Nothing. Nothing but awkwardness.
I think we both just wanted to get out of there.
If she only knew why I couldn't get it up for her.

That was the last sexual encounter that we had due to various circumstances and moving away from each other.

I think we can classify that one as a sexual disaster! I failed.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Anonymous #98

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #97]
    #8518236 - 06/13/08 02:06 AM (15 years, 7 months ago)

You should have just fucked her and if you came really quick explain that it's because you haven't had sex in ages (which was true) - that way she'll learn that if she wants longer sex, you guys'll have to do it more often. Win-win.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Anonymous #99

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #98]
    #8518396 - 06/13/08 03:37 AM (15 years, 7 months ago)

This isnt nearly as bad as the ones ive read thus far but my only bad experience was my attempt at my first time...i was hella drunk and so was this chick and we were swimming in a pool and it was at night so it was about 65-70 degrees out and we were fucking shivering in that pool so when we finally got down to putting it in i just couldnt get it...i wasnt that hard to begin with and my inexperience prevailed as i could not get it in because i couldnt see and we were forced into an awkward position so i basically missed my chance at losing my virginity that night..luckily it wasnt my only.... it was slightly embarrasing but we actually became pretty good friends afterwards..


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Anonymous #37

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #99]
    #8519178 - 06/13/08 10:57 AM (15 years, 7 months ago)

a friend of mine wanted to fart on his girlfriends leg and ended up shitting himself. was super wet running down his leg and soaked through his shorts.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Anonymous #84

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #37]
    #8521261 - 06/13/08 07:23 PM (15 years, 7 months ago)

LOL


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Anonymous #100

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #8524425 - 06/14/08 06:02 PM (15 years, 7 months ago)

I fucked a really, really fat chick (300+ lbs) without a rubber. Pulled out and had a huge glob of blood and other vaginal mucous on my junk.

Wiped it off on her sheets and never called her back. Desperation is a bitch, gentlemen.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Anonymous #56

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #100]
    #8524483 - 06/14/08 06:27 PM (15 years, 7 months ago)

One time I fucked a goat and the goat nibbled off my genitals. It was a sexual disaster! :awesome::thumbup:


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Anonymous #101

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #56]
    #8535033 - 06/17/08 07:58 PM (15 years, 7 months ago)

One time I puked a little in my girlfriends mouth after she made me take a shot of jager after i had been drinkin beers all night while we were gettin intimate. still got laid but...
it was a sexual disaster!


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Anonymous #2

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #101]
    #8535269 - 06/17/08 09:19 PM (15 years, 7 months ago)

I got so into using my vibrator once that I didn't realize I needed more lube and I ended up with a friction burn/blister on my clit.  :eek:


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Anonymous #48

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #8540233 - 06/19/08 09:29 AM (15 years, 7 months ago)

Wow, we are all sexual disasters.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Anonymous #102

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #48]
    #8541680 - 06/19/08 05:58 PM (15 years, 7 months ago)

first time having sex, drunk as fuck, couldn't get it up, then I vomited on the bed right beside her and on her shoes and clothes.

it was a sexual disaster, but she was nice about it and let me try again the next day, so I guess it had a happy ending.

oh wait, a couple of weeks before that I was playing strip poker with my flatmate and 2 girls from across the hall, one of them is fat and the other was ok, but to my virgin ass they both looked really good. anyway, everyone gets really wasted and ends up in my flatmates bedroom. the girls are making out, everythings going well, "this is pimp" or so I thought, anyway the next thing I know the fat one is kissing me and I was fingering her. long story short I end up doing a backwards roll off the end of the bed while trying to remove my pants. the next day everyone knew and the fat girl made out that I was some kind of creep, when really I was just drunk as fuck.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Anonymous #103

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #102]
    #8541697 - 06/19/08 06:03 PM (15 years, 7 months ago)

Lol, once I came on my ex's face and it went straight up her nose, my load was huge too.

Although I found it funny.


Another time my ex got caught giving me head by her dad.

I got caught having sex in a public toilet by 2 toddlers and a mother...


I haven't laughed so hard in a few years.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Anonymous #59

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #103]
    #8954768 - 09/19/08 01:06 PM (15 years, 4 months ago)

Bump for old times' sake. I know someone has a story to post.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Anonymous #104

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #15]
    #8955302 - 09/19/08 03:10 PM (15 years, 4 months ago)

I had my gf bent over in a stall of a restroom in a bar. Her friends came in and started watching us. We got into a discussion about my cock piercings and her friends wanted to see them. So I pulled out and noticed one of them was missing but it was there when we started. Her friends said I thought you had two. I had to tell the gf I lost it up in her. It was awkward for a minute and then she said not to worry about it we will find it later.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Anonymous #105

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #8955344 - 09/19/08 03:23 PM (15 years, 4 months ago)

hear* :mad:


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Jump to top Pages: < Back | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | Next >

Kraken Kratom Shop: Red Vein Kratom


Extra information
You cannot start new topics / You cannot reply to topics
HTML is disabled / BBCode is enabled
Moderator: trendal, Shroomism, george castanza, Alan Rockefeller, yogabunny
13,589 topic views. 2 members, 4 guests and 4 web crawlers are browsing this forum.
[ Show Images Only | Sort by Score | Print Topic ]
Search this thread:

Copyright 1997-2024 Mind Media. Some rights reserved.

Generated in 0.028 seconds spending 0.009 seconds on 15 queries.