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Anonymous #1

Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! * 1
    #7714013 - 12/04/07 04:50 AM (16 years, 1 month ago)

Let’s hear them! I have two to share. All start with number two.

When was in highschool I got this pot head chick all shitfaced and convinced her to let me fuck her in the ass. She passed out whilst I was fucking her and released a huge dump on my dick. Right after that she woke up and said, “I think I pooped on you”. Next day her friends tell me she has Herpes.

I didn’t get the Herp, but my young mind was scared for life.

It was a sexual disaster!

But the number one all time nastiest disaster was when I bought a full service escourt. We started fucking and she was pretty raunchy, I had trouble getting it up, and since I had to fuck her with a condom I also had trouble coming.

I only paid for one hour of service, and she was starting to pressure me to cum so I tyold her to use her hand. Still wasn’t working, so I told her to sit on my face and I ate her out while she jacked me off. I finally came and immediately realized how bad I had just fucked up

After she left I literally spent an hour washing my mouth out with every antiseptic I could find in my house. This included Listerine, Iso Alcohol, and peroxide. Yes I washed my mouth out more than one with each of those substances. Yes it probably knocked 10 years off of my life.

It was a sexual disaster!


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Anonymous #2

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #7714273 - 12/04/07 08:13 AM (16 years, 1 month ago)

Anytime my husband wants to fuck but he's too drunk it's a sexual disaster.  He can't keep it up, can't cum and has no rhythm.  :thumbdown:

And the damn thing keeps falling out!


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Anonymous #1

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #7714329 - 12/04/07 08:35 AM (16 years, 1 month ago)

lol


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Anonymous #3

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #7714569 - 12/04/07 09:57 AM (16 years, 1 month ago)

I got really fucken drunk one night at a bar, and wound up getting a ride home from some gay guy...only...we went back to his house instead - where he fucked me up the ass, and made me walk home from there

that one was certainly a disaster  :sad:


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Anonymous #4

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #3]
    #7714640 - 12/04/07 10:14 AM (16 years, 1 month ago)

Its funny how Muppet's posts are the only ones I can identify in the Anonymous forum.


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Anonymous #1

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #4]
    #7714766 - 12/04/07 10:47 AM (16 years, 1 month ago)

:lol:


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Anonymous #5

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #7715037 - 12/04/07 11:52 AM (16 years, 1 month ago)

I once fucked a corpse. :muppet:


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Anonymous #6

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #7715045 - 12/04/07 11:54 AM (16 years, 1 month ago)

five years ago when i first lost my virginity, the girl i was fucking started her period right after i started fucking her and it scar'd me for life (well for a couple weeks)


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Anonymous #7

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #6]
    #7715095 - 12/04/07 12:05 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

my girlfriend at the time and i fucked on the fourth of july. it was fucking awesome awesome sex. seriously. right on the living room floor. fucked for an hour or so, then stopped and took a breather for like 20 minutes. then went at it again for like 45 minutes before i came deep inside her. she literally climaxed 14 times. to this day, that is still my record. later that day we had a huge fight and broke up.






4 weeks later she told me she hadn't had her period in weeks.

It was a sexual disaster!


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Anonymous #1

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #7]
    #7715142 - 12/04/07 12:14 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

Ok so you know how malls have these back corridors that lead to the rear delivery entrances of shops? One of the ghetto malls in my town never had them locked and we would sneak in.

So I was with my highschool girlfriend and we were making out in one of these corridors. We decide to fuck so I lay her down on the cement and we start fucking. It was one of my first times fucking. I take a break and look down, and there is this huge pile of blood on the cement like the size of a dinner plate.

We freaked out and got all zipped up, ran to the bathrooms so she could check her self out. And than as were walking out of the mall we pass a maintenance guy and he’s talking over the radio with another worker that’s freaking out thinking someone got there head smashed in the corridor.

I didn’t take that bitches virginity, all that blood came from inside of her. To this day I still don’t know what was wrong with that bitch.

It was a sexual Disaster!


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Anonymous #8

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #7715370 - 12/04/07 01:14 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

i once had sex with your mom.

It was a sexual Disaster!


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Anonymous #9

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #8]
    #7715520 - 12/04/07 01:50 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

I like sex when the woman puts her feet against my chest...it's better than ankles over the shoulders, at least for me..but one time this chick I was having sex with had a magnificent out..I'm talking the fart blew my sack in the air like a mud flap on a semi truck.

Not so much disastrous as it was funny.


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Anonymous #7

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #9]
    #7715634 - 12/04/07 02:13 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

eww.. i'd lose my hard-on.


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Anonymous #10

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #7]
    #7715731 - 12/04/07 02:32 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

I had sex one night while on a high dose of Poppy Tea, DXM and Ephedrine.... We fucked for hours and hours.... Neither of us could cum.... But it felt so good....
It was a sexual disaster.


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Anonymous #11

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #10]
    #7715849 - 12/04/07 02:57 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

i am THE

sexual disaster.

my dick has no sensation its really fucked up.


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Anonymous #12

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #7716172 - 12/04/07 04:03 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
Anytime my husband wants to fuck but he's too drunk it's a sexual disaster.  He can't keep it up, can't cum and has no rhythm.  :thumbdown:

And the damn thing keeps falling out!




that pretty much explains my sexual disaster(s)


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Anonymous #13

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #7716317 - 12/04/07 04:43 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

Not too many disasters for me really

But one time i was screwing this dumb cunt after a night of heavy drinking, and when i was done and pulled out my dick was covered in blood. She was having her period (and my guess is she knew it). When i pulled out and saw the blood i was like "uhhhgg", that bitch laughed harder than I ever seen her laugh before. So I went to the bathroom and washed up.. i dont like that bitch.


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Anonymous #3

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #5]
    #7717087 - 12/04/07 07:42 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
I once fucked a corpse. :muppet:



hey now...you really shouldn't be posing as other people anonymously ya know  :nono:


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Anonymous #14

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #3]
    #7717190 - 12/04/07 08:05 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

Fucking someone untill their arse got loose. I got lots of shit on my dick, I already came, so I lost the mood for a second round then.


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Anonymous #15

Re: Lets here your sexual disasters. Be Honest! [Re: Anonymous #14]
    #7717824 - 12/04/07 10:34 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

One night me and my roommates girlfriend were just sitting on the couch watching tv while I was popping xanax and drinking vodka. I was getting really fucked up. She all of a sudden puts some porn on, I didn't think anything of it really, I was so fucked up that I was just kind of lost in my zone. She suddenly starts massaging my legs, I was beginning to realize that she may want to have sex with me. Seeing that she was my roommates girlfriend, I didn't want to make any moves unless I was 100% positive that she wanted to have sex. Then she just starts rubbing my crotch. It clicks. She puts on porn, encourages me to get drunk and is rubbing my naughties. I'm pretty sure wants to fuck me.

I lean over and kiss her and she immediately pulls off her skirt with no sense of trying to build up any kind of intimacy whatsoever. Turns out she wasn't wearing any underwear either. I'm getting ready to take off my pants when I realize fucking my roommates girlfriend on the couch in the middle of the living room is bad bad idea. Considering that the other 3 roommates were home at the time too. I take her into my room and start fucking her. The xanax and booze begins to get the best of me and I just lose it. I have no control over what is about to happen.

I blow this horrid stream of projectile vomit all over her face and stomach. I am so fucked up I don't even care. I just say, "sorry about that" and turn over moaning because I feel so bad. She is obviously disgusted. I go and take a shower, so does she. To my complete amazement, after crouching in the corner of the shower for a straight hour, I come back to my room to find her laying on my bed again still wanting to fuck. We probably had sex for a good 2 hours and then she tells me that she shouldn't of had sex with me because she has a boyfriend.

It was bad sex btw, I was so drunk and sloppy, I put my dick in her ass a couple times thinking it was her vagina and she had to tell me I had the wrong hole. It was so sloppy...

Real Story.

*Oliveplume


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