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InvisiblePyroBurns
душа кофе


Registered: 10/14/07
Posts: 4,343
I need a little life coaching help, please.
    #7707985 - 12/02/07 07:02 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

The problem being:

I do not know what to do with the next 9 months/2 years of my life. All I know is that I need to finish my degree, but that can be done anywhere.

After finding out what a shithole Columbus is, my plans of finishing school here at OSU are blown out of the water. I thought it was going to be a good life in a good city but that just didn't happen. I fucking HATE Columbus. OSU doesn't please me much either, but it definitely could be tolerated if it wasn't here.

After going through half of this quarter I decided to go back to my community college in my hometown, but I also hate Ohio in general. This place just sucks. Though, I might be able to tolerate it if I made some good friends and found some nice connects. But then I still don't know where I'd go after finishing my gen eds. and I'd still feel like there's nothing but garbage miles around me.

THEN I had this crazy idea about finishing my gen eds. in Portland Oregon (where I already applied/got accepted to a community college there) but I have no idea how that would be or if that would be a good idea. At least here I'd get to see my family every now and then even if things were going sour. But if I ended up not liking it over there I'd be dicked for another quarter just like over here. Then again, it would be a huge adventure and step in maturity for me.

I just don't know what to do. I'd like to visit there first but that might be too expensive to run all the way out there, then run all the way back, then run out again.

Any advice?


--------------------
Remember to cut your nails regularly.



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Offlinemushroomplume
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Registered: 10/16/06
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Last seen: 14 years, 19 days
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: PyroBurns]
    #7708055 - 12/02/07 07:17 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

What would you be doing with your life if you had no friends or family?



*Hopefully this gives you some ideas. You shouldn't let anyone tell you what to do, you will be unhappy. I promise.


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InvisibleHolydiver
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Posts: 5,156
Loc: The midnight sea
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: PyroBurns]
    #7708072 - 12/02/07 07:20 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

Yeah, get out of Ohio now and don't waste another day. I flip-flopped on that one forever, and the only thing delaying me was my family. In retrospect, I wasted some good years just sticking around for my family.

Don't fret over the small details, in the end they screw you and don't mean anything. What you can't possibly predict are all the good parts, like how much you will grow taking on something new and huge like a big move.

And degrees, well they are blah. Just get one in something, the fastest route to a 2 year or 4 year ticket. Unless you want to go for engineering, etc.

But the only way to go is to wing it, and don't worry about things. I wish I took this advice instead of hanging out in Ohio all those years.


--------------------
To find a place to live between the negatives and positives.


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InvisiblePyroBurns
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Registered: 10/14/07
Posts: 4,343
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: mushroomplume]
    #7708073 - 12/02/07 07:20 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

My friends all disbanded. I don't have any now.

I would miss my family, but if I stayed home I'd still be wondering what was out there and loating Ohio.


--------------------
Remember to cut your nails regularly.



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OfflineMushroomTrip
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Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: PyroBurns]
    #7708113 - 12/02/07 07:30 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

Well, let's see: you're not exactly comfortable with the place you are right now. his is a reason to leave.
BUT also: you weren't happy with the place you were before moving back home, so then the entire situation gets more complicated. Maybe there's nothing wrong with those place, but with your state of mind.
Which means that you can keep moving on & on and still feel shitty.
And that's because you need to change your attitude.
Do you feel lonely?
Because I hear you arguing about the fact that you don't have any friends. Is it only because you're supposed to have friends, because everybody has friends? Is it because maybe you find it difficult to spend time on your own? If the answer is yes, to any or both of these questions, then the problem is again with you.
Until we feel good with ourselves and only with ourselves, we're unable to enjoy life in any other form presented.


--------------------
:bunny::bunnyhug:
All this time I've loved you
And never known your face
All this time I've missed you
And searched this human race
Here is true peace
Here my heart knows calm
Safe in your soul
Bathed in your sighs

:bunnyhug: :yinyang2:


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InvisibleGGreatOne234
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Registered: 12/23/99
Posts: 8,946
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: PyroBurns]
    #7708138 - 12/02/07 07:37 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

You would love Oregon. No need to visit first, just go.


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InvisiblePyroBurns
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Registered: 10/14/07
Posts: 4,343
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: MushroomTrip]
    #7708150 - 12/02/07 07:42 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

"Which means that you can keep moving on & on and still feel shitty.
And that's because you need to change your attitude.
Do you feel lonely?
Because I hear you arguing about the fact that you don't have any friends. Is it only because you're supposed to have friends, because everybody has friends? Is it because maybe you find it difficult to spend time on your own? If the answer is yes, to any or both of these questions, then the problem is again with you.
Until we feel good with ourselves and only with ourselves, we're unable to enjoy life in any other form presented.
"



This is what I've been contemplating a lot recently. And I mean a LOT.

Maybe it's in my head? Maybe I wouldn't be happy anywhere?

But a few weeks ago I had it all figured out. I was really happy and doing great, but still knew I hated Ohio. I hate the fact that people here are mainly depressed drugged out teens, or old people living on farms or in middle class housing or in fake high class housing with a stick up their ass. There really isn't much to do here, and I've been driving around a lot. The only thing that's nice is the greater cleveland area, but there's really nothing there but some nice shopping. Canton is okay too, but again it's like a little bubble surrounded by farms. And I'd have to find a school there.

Then I got depressed again, probably due to either finals or my disease. Now I'm getting cold feet about moving, and feel like I don't know myself again.


As for the friend thing, I was just responding to the first post. I'm pretty much fine without them, but it'd be nice to have a good friend to hang out with time to time, again.


--------------------
Remember to cut your nails regularly.



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InvisibleChiefGreenLeaf

Registered: 01/11/07
Posts: 1,596
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: PyroBurns]
    #7710000 - 12/03/07 09:13 AM (16 years, 1 month ago)

Go just plan a new life when you get their.


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Offlinefung_us_among_us
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Posts: 6,906
Loc: Central Oregon Flag
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Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: ChiefGreenLeaf]
    #7710943 - 12/03/07 01:11 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

great one is right, you'd love oregon. i've lived here all my life and don't plan on leaving anytime soon.. portland is great, so is eugene.

i've never been to ohio before but from the sound of it there's not a whole lot there. what do you like to do for fun? biking is great in portland, also there's a good music scene, tons of restaurants, culture, etc. far from just drugged out teens and old hillbillies, although you are sure to meet some of those too.


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:feelsgoodman::dancingshroom::dancingshroom::dancingshroom::ahahaha::dancingshroom::dancingshroom::dancingshroom::feelsgoodman:


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OfflineMushroomTrip
Dr. Teasy Thighs
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Registered: 12/02/05
Posts: 14,794
Loc: red panda village
Last seen: 2 years, 10 months
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: PyroBurns]
    #7711494 - 12/03/07 03:38 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

Well then what are you waiting for? :smile:
Change your life the way you want, the way that it suits you best, any time that you feel that it's necessary, no matter how absurd or weird would seem to those around you.


--------------------
:bunny::bunnyhug:
All this time I've loved you
And never known your face
All this time I've missed you
And searched this human race
Here is true peace
Here my heart knows calm
Safe in your soul
Bathed in your sighs

:bunnyhug: :yinyang2:


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InvisiblePyroBurns
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Registered: 10/14/07
Posts: 4,343
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: MushroomTrip]
    #7712302 - 12/03/07 06:28 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

Yeah, I'm probably still going to go. This short bout of depression is lifting, and I just can't see why I'd want to hold back.


--------------------
Remember to cut your nails regularly.



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OfflineNiamhNyx
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Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: PyroBurns]
    #7715270 - 12/04/07 12:46 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

Go!


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Invisiblemachination
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Registered: 09/17/07
Posts: 705
Loc: Hringhorni
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: PyroBurns]
    #7717372 - 12/04/07 08:41 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

what is calling you?


--------------------
"Have you not learned that your word is bond? Yes, my word is bond and bond is life, I shall give my life, before my word shall fail."


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InvisiblePyroBurns
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Registered: 10/14/07
Posts: 4,343
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: machination]
    #7718811 - 12/05/07 08:44 AM (16 years, 1 month ago)

I don't even know. I really don't understand why I wanted to go to Portland in the first place.

It just came into my mind when I was thinking of a nicer place to live and stuck. Which is stange, considering I really knew nothing about it.


--------------------
Remember to cut your nails regularly.



Edited by PyroBurns (12/05/07 08:45 AM)


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Invisiblemachination
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Registered: 09/17/07
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Loc: Hringhorni
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: PyroBurns]
    #7718890 - 12/05/07 09:15 AM (16 years, 1 month ago)

well until you learn to walk, you can order call of the wild from the internets. even when you go blind, you can still see. much love man g


--------------------
"Have you not learned that your word is bond? Yes, my word is bond and bond is life, I shall give my life, before my word shall fail."


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OfflineNiamhNyx
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Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: machination]
    #7719304 - 12/05/07 11:37 AM (16 years, 1 month ago)

Portland is a great city, and even if things still aren't perfect (which they won't be) at least you aren't in Ohio anymore, and you can feel good about yourself for stepping up to the challenge of changing your life and trying something new. It's better to explore and be disappointed than stay in a tiny bubble that is unsatisfying and always wonder what could have been if you just went for it.


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Offlinemushroomplume
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Registered: 10/16/06
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Last seen: 14 years, 19 days
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: NiamhNyx]
    #7719335 - 12/05/07 11:45 AM (16 years, 1 month ago)

I fucking love Portland, I would give my left nut to be living there right now. It is such an ecological, beautiful, and hip city. Everyone seems to be doing something there, you can see mountains in the distance, forests everywhere, the perfect temperature all year round.

Oh my god, I'm seriously getting kind of sad writing this. I live in shitty south florida where cabana boys, margaritas, and car wrecks related to old age seem to be the norm.

i envy you man.

My Backyard:



Your Backyard:



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InvisibleGGreatOne234
Stranger
Registered: 12/23/99
Posts: 8,946
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: PyroBurns]
    #7719536 - 12/05/07 12:36 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

Here is a cool website: www.oregon.com


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InvisibleSilversoul
Rhizome
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Registered: 01/01/05
Posts: 23,576
Loc: The Barricades
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: mushroomplume]
    #7719596 - 12/05/07 01:00 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

Quote:

oliveplume said:
I fucking love Portland, I would give my left nut to be living there right now. It is such an ecological, beautiful, and hip city. Everyone seems to be doing something there, you can see mountains in the distance, forests everywhere, the perfect temperature all year round.



Well, I don't know about perfect temperature, and it can get kind of depressing not seeing the sun for weeks at a time, but it definitely rocks living here.  The culture here is so amazing, and yes, the view of the mountains in the distance is awesome.

Quote:

Oh my god, I'm seriously getting kind of sad writing this. I live in shitty south florida where cabana boys, margaritas, and car wrecks related to old age seem to be the norm.



:frown: That sucks, man.  Florida has got to be my least favorite state, with the possible exception of Alabama. 

Quote:

Your Backyard:





*sigh* It is beautiful, isn't it?


--------------------


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InvisiblePyroBurns
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Registered: 10/14/07
Posts: 4,343
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: Silversoul]
    #7728163 - 12/07/07 10:38 AM (16 years, 1 month ago)

Wow... Well that really fucking sucks. I'm having trouble with my loan money because they don't do community colleges. So I'm pretty fucked.

Don't really know what to do now.


--------------------
Remember to cut your nails regularly.



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Invisiblemachination
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Registered: 09/17/07
Posts: 705
Loc: Hringhorni
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: PyroBurns]
    #7728208 - 12/07/07 10:47 AM (16 years, 1 month ago)

if you look right at the money or you'll go blind and never find it
if you look for the fun, thou might find money gives itself to you


--------------------
"Have you not learned that your word is bond? Yes, my word is bond and bond is life, I shall give my life, before my word shall fail."


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InvisiblePyroBurns
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Registered: 10/14/07
Posts: 4,343
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: machination]
    #7801604 - 12/26/07 06:10 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

Now, my problem is, I only have $400. I can sell some stock at a loss to get an extra $2,000. I'm thinking about doing it.

The thing is, I have like two weeks to figure all of this out. To get college classes set up at Portland Community College, get the feds to transfer my Stafford loan to it, and hurry up and move in to an apartment. Then I need to hurry up and get a job so I can pay for the upcoming rent bills and food.

I have a lot of apartments that I'm looking at for around $500 a month 1br/1ba with water/sewer/garbage paid with a few rare ones at around $390-450 with the same stats. Most have a security deposit of around $500 but then some rare ones at $300 or so.

There's one I'm really looking at. A one bed/bath apartment above a familie's garage. 500/mo, all utilities, and a 250 deposit.

What should be my next step? I'm really at a loss at what to do.


--------------------
Remember to cut your nails regularly.



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InvisibleGGreatOne234
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Registered: 12/23/99
Posts: 8,946
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: PyroBurns]
    #7802066 - 12/26/07 09:08 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

well i would save more money first

oregon isnt going anywhere anytime soon


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InvisiblePyroBurns
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Registered: 10/14/07
Posts: 4,343
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: GGreatOne234]
    #7802153 - 12/26/07 09:45 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

But what am I going to do in the meantime? I'll never be able to get settled, and the job market here sucks. Besides, the apartments cost the same, and I'd be taking the same classes for the same cost. Except, I'll spend time waiting to move.


--------------------
Remember to cut your nails regularly.



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OfflineNiamhNyx
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Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: PyroBurns]
    #7802449 - 12/26/07 11:21 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

Sounds like you should just move. Do you have anyone that could loan you a month's rent? The job market is supposed to suck in Portland too, so really, whether you stay or go you're facing pretty much the exact same circumstances. At least if you leave you get to feel like you're actively working to improve your situation rather than wallowing in a rut.


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InvisibleGGreatOne234
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Registered: 12/23/99
Posts: 8,946
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: NiamhNyx]
    #7803402 - 12/27/07 10:14 AM (16 years, 1 month ago)

yes, i consider oregon the promised land

but there is a joke that i heard

why do so many hippies live in eugene oregon?

because there is no work there

portland has more opportunity, but, still

if i was to move half way across the country, i would for certain bring more then two thousand dollars

most of the two grand will probably be gone by the time you even get to the oregon state line


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InvisiblePyroBurns
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Registered: 10/14/07
Posts: 4,343
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: GGreatOne234]
    #7803474 - 12/27/07 10:44 AM (16 years, 1 month ago)

Why is that? I have more money I can get, but I don't feel like selling right now.

I assume that all I need is about $300 in travelling expenses, then the security deposit, then hopefully I can find a job before paying the first month's rent (which I would afford with the other part of the 2k anyways).


--------------------
Remember to cut your nails regularly.



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InvisibleGGreatOne234
Stranger
Registered: 12/23/99
Posts: 8,946
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: PyroBurns]
    #7804540 - 12/27/07 04:09 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

well, i am just guessing, i am not sure what kind of gas mileage you get, but 300 dollars seems like a low ball figure for driving from ohio to portland

dont get me wrong, you are going to absolutely love your new surroundings, but i personally would not get the cheapest apartment around

and it will probably be a good five day drive about, maybe 10-12 hours a day, probably 2-3 tanks of gas a day, about 50 dollars each, and are you going to sleep in motels along the way or just sleep in your car

sounds like a long haul to be sleeping in your car every night, your head and body would be toast by time you arrive

are you going to just live in your car until you find a place to live, that would be rough.. i would look for a crossland economy stuidios in the area, they charge about thirty bucks a night on a weekly basis, otherwise you will be spending a good fifty seventy dollars a night until you find a place to live

then there is food and whatever along the way

might want to have your car tuned up before you go, and a oil change before you leave and when you arrive, maybe get new tires even

i really would not count on finding a job right away, i would plan in advance in the case that you may run into a lot of dead ends, unless you already have a solid career established and some solid job leads or possibly a definate hire upon arrival

i am not trying to tell you not to do it, i think it is a wonderful idea, but i have done it before and, you will probably need more cash than you think

are you going to rent a trailer, that is a few hundred dollars right there

then some apartment managers would not want to rent to someone without a job yet, but not all of them

i am just telling you how i would do it, have all my travel expenses and first two months of living expenses figured out and paid for, and another five grand on top of that for security


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InvisiblePyroBurns
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Registered: 10/14/07
Posts: 4,343
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: GGreatOne234]
    #7804595 - 12/27/07 04:28 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

Yeah, those are all very big problems.

My stuff will all be able to fit into my truck, which is working fine right now. I planned on just sleeping in my truck, and driving as much as possible until I got there.

I have a few thousand available, but have only on job in the past as my experience which will make it harder to get one, as my college education thus far wasn't very specialized yet.

I'm calling a few apartment places right now to see if they would let someone live there with no proof of income with no luck. So I might have to rough it for a few days, and maybe stay in a hostel if I was desperate.

What really sucks ass is if I am not able to make it, I'll be living for the exact same prices here with a worse economy. Gaaah! This week is so stressful.


--------------------
Remember to cut your nails regularly.



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InvisibleGGreatOne234
Stranger
Registered: 12/23/99
Posts: 8,946
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: PyroBurns]
    #7804707 - 12/27/07 05:01 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

i would suggest not looking at it as a problem but as challenge

.. it will almost definately rain and snow along the way, so protect all your possessions from the elements somehow

i think uh, i think you might be able to sleep in your vehicle over night in a super walmart parking lot, possibly, otherwise, where do you plan on parking in the city overnight like that without being hassled

you might be able to squeeze by with a few grand, but by all means try to get more

you would really have to have a place to live all lined up for when you arrive, otherwise you might find it difficult navigating through a city that you are not familiar with yet trying to find a decent place to live

then, you might have a place to live in advance and when you get there you might not like the place that you picked, that is something else to keep in mind

you will also need to get a new state liscense, those are about fifty dollars, and new liscense plates eventually too

if you do not have a career path with experience under your belt, i would imagine that your job there would pay minimum wage.. you might start out at a employment agency and find something that pays at least ten twelve a hour if you are lucky, and if you can pass a drug test

then if you wanted to go to school, you can count on that guzzleing up some dollars, less time to make income more time to waste not making many pennies

you will probably love the enviroment though, it is a big change compared to ohio, change is good, and so are risks like this, makes you a stronger person

that is about all that i can think of right now


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InvisiblePyroBurns
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Registered: 10/14/07
Posts: 4,343
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: GGreatOne234]
    #7804930 - 12/27/07 06:02 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

I'm calling even more apartments and they keep telling me I need at least a year of rental history or some shit.

How the hell are you supposed to get one if you can't rent!? God this is driving me crazy.


--------------------
Remember to cut your nails regularly.



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InvisibleGGreatOne234
Stranger
Registered: 12/23/99
Posts: 8,946
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: PyroBurns]
    #7804989 - 12/27/07 06:19 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

welcome to the real world PyroBurns

it becomes a lot easier to accomplish when you have the dough to grease the wheels


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InvisiblePyroBurns
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Registered: 10/14/07
Posts: 4,343
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: GGreatOne234]
    #7805720 - 12/27/07 09:57 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

I talked to my mom, and I might have to just put the great move off for a quarter.

From that, I have the advantage of getting a job first, getting school together in time (so the loans don't collapse on me), and then being able to rack up some credit history/money. But would that be enough for me to move out in the future? They were talking about a year of rental history and whatnot. O_o

Thanks for the advice btw.

Yeah it would suck to not make my big move that I was dreaming about right now, but it would suck worse to get completely clobbered with bullshit when I got there. Maybe waiting 3-6 months would be better.


--------------------
Remember to cut your nails regularly.



Edited by PyroBurns (12/27/07 10:01 PM)


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InvisibleGGreatOne234
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Registered: 12/23/99
Posts: 8,946
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: PyroBurns]
    #7805817 - 12/27/07 10:27 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

well pyro, it was a good idea for you to talk with your mom, i am sure that she wants you to achieve your goals in the best ways possible

keep a clear eye on your dreams, the better prepared and healthier and stronger you become the smoother things will work out for you in most of lifes endeavours

i have found that the bigger the risks that you make in persuing a career, or having the guts to try something new and better will lead to greater opportunties.. aim high, if you find something really solid that you like and feel good about and you enjoy then that job will probably be waiting for you in portland

school can be very helpful for most people, it exercises your brain, and that is probably the most important tool you have got, a brilliant mind is capable of achieving great things

from my experience, a sufficient bank account is more important than a rental history, but if you can get a good rental history then that will only make things easier for you in the future


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InvisiblePyroBurns
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Registered: 10/14/07
Posts: 4,343
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: GGreatOne234]
    #7805840 - 12/27/07 10:32 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

Do you think I'm cheating myself by waiting? I mean, I do have 8k in stocks that I can sell. But then again, I have some loans lingering over me that could be pretty serious if I don't get settled right away with my big move.


--------------------
Remember to cut your nails regularly.



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Invisiblemachination
Stranger
Registered: 09/17/07
Posts: 705
Loc: Hringhorni
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: PyroBurns]
    #7816554 - 12/31/07 10:27 AM (16 years, 1 month ago)

it sounds like u r making this harder than it needs to be..

are u studing with the treasure hunters or the treasure givers

u can do the lolz dance in your head relay quiet like until it explodes n u r smiling the deep smile with all life n find ur self wif eternity n sol

ka now my end.

i give u some gas monis forze ride to west coast niggah
or magic the gathering cards, we work something out, let me know


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"Have you not learned that your word is bond? Yes, my word is bond and bond is life, I shall give my life, before my word shall fail."


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Offlineeve69
--=..Did Adam and ...?=--
Male User Gallery


Registered: 04/30/03
Posts: 3,910
Loc: isle de la muerte Flag
Last seen: 24 days, 7 hours
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: machination]
    #7816583 - 12/31/07 10:37 AM (16 years, 1 month ago)

Move to somewhere else. Follow your heart and dreams. Don't be practical. Don't finish your undergrad where you hate it. Because then you can't get more money for undergrad. You need to transfer while you're still enrolled. I always wanted to live in The Village, but I graduated from undergrad and then I leanrned what it seemed everyone else knew, I couldn't get a second BA and more student loans. I had shitty college counselors. All they wanted at my uni was to keep all the students there as long as possible and keep raking in money.


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...or something







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OfflineEpigallo
Stranger
Registered: 09/17/06
Posts: 8,155
Last seen: 6 years, 10 months
Re: I need a little life coaching help, please. [Re: eve69]
    #7817006 - 12/31/07 01:00 PM (16 years, 1 month ago)

if it's early in your college career maybe you can take some time off and get an internship in another state?

you can probably find something that pays; check out the 'peace corps' thread in this forum


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