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emilbus
Drunk

Registered: 10/01/06
Posts: 1,113
Loc: Texas
Last seen: 16 years, 1 month
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Re: I did something really bad and forgot that it happened [Re: Tangerines]
#7679888 - 11/25/07 09:00 PM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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  You look down at me and you see a fool You look up at me and you see a god You look straight at me and you see yourself
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Tangerines




Registered: 04/17/05
Posts: 17,918
Loc: woodwork
Last seen: 4 years, 23 days
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Re: I did something really bad and forgot that it happened [Re: emilbus]
#7680060 - 11/25/07 10:13 PM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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sirbojangles
h20

Registered: 10/22/05
Posts: 1,298
Loc: inside a transparent eyeb...
Last seen: 10 years, 8 months
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Re: I did something really bad and forgot that it happened [Re: Maron]
#7680095 - 11/25/07 10:32 PM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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obviously there has to be more to the story
was there some sort of issue that existed prior to the trip?
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Sophistic Radiance
Free sVs!



Registered: 07/11/06
Posts: 43,135
Loc: Center of the Universe
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Re: I did something really bad and forgot that it happened [Re: Tangerines]
#7680267 - 11/26/07 12:00 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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I've made out with gay men at raves. What can I say, lowered inhibitions and all, and I was curious. After having tried it, I can say it's really not my bag. Thank you, rave culture.
Shrooms make me feel like I love everyone in the universe equally, which is to say a lot... it never made me want to fuck my friends, though.
-------------------- Enlil said: You really are the worst kind of person.
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fazdazzle
Wanderer


Registered: 02/17/05
Posts: 1,796
Last seen: 11 years, 27 days
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Re: I did something really bad and forgot that it happened [Re: Sophistic Radiance]
#7680392 - 11/26/07 01:24 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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Sex is much different than physical affection like kissing, hugging, touching, etc.
I don't see it as a big deal in regard to your friend, though it is obviously a big deal for your psyche since it repressed it so quickly - think about it and possibly like the other poster said use mushrooms to figure this out about yourself.
As for the other poster who is afraid of being attracted to guys - you are fearful, why? of being a social outcast? would you rather be a strong self-identified social outcast or have friends but secretly want to screw them?
Furthermore, there is no problem with seeing members of the same sex as being attractive; because they are! it seems like it's ok for girls to say "Ohh she is so beautiful!" but guys are so afraid to say another man is handsome. You're not gay just because you realize the true beauty of another human being.
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Merkin
neep.



Registered: 07/04/03
Posts: 27,537
Loc: Ass Flavoured Pie Factory
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Re: I did something really bad and forgot that it happened [Re: laxisfun]
#7680531 - 11/26/07 03:44 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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mushrooms are gay.
-------------------- Wheels of cheese wheeels of cheeeeese!!!
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emilbus
Drunk

Registered: 10/01/06
Posts: 1,113
Loc: Texas
Last seen: 16 years, 1 month
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Re: I did something really bad and forgot that it happened [Re: Merkin]
#7680732 - 11/26/07 06:58 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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i thought this when i was younger. because of my uncle i knew a lot of older guys from the 60's and 70's and they all use to go on and on about mushrooms. out of all these older hippies, 6, 2 of them were gay, one was a pedophile (hes in prison now, thank god), one was bisexual, and the other 2 were straight but really, really weird. my uncle was off too and man did he like younger chicks. I'm talking like 14-15. I'm not saying its right but at least it was younger boys. oh that guy who is in prison, he took more mushrooms then all of them. i dunno just kinda threw me off.
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  You look down at me and you see a fool You look up at me and you see a god You look straight at me and you see yourself
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xFrockx



Registered: 09/17/06
Posts: 10,455
Loc: Northeast
Last seen: 11 days, 12 hours
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Re: I did something really bad and forgot that it happened [Re: emilbus] 1
#7680824 - 11/26/07 07:51 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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I don't think there's a dose-response reaction when it comes to mushrooms and having sex with children, but maybe thats just me.
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emilbus
Drunk

Registered: 10/01/06
Posts: 1,113
Loc: Texas
Last seen: 16 years, 1 month
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Re: I did something really bad and forgot that it happened [Re: xFrockx]
#7680828 - 11/26/07 07:53 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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i know, i just found it a little off.
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  You look down at me and you see a fool You look up at me and you see a god You look straight at me and you see yourself
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Maron
Stranger

Registered: 11/23/07
Posts: 11
Last seen: 16 years, 1 month
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Re: I did something really bad and forgot that it happened [Re: sirbojangles]
#7680858 - 11/26/07 08:12 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
sirbojangles said: obviously there has to be more to the story
was there some sort of issue that existed prior to the trip?
After the trip my best friend (let's call him Kevin, to make it easy) left before we could talk to eachother, so then my other friend ("Tom") explained what happened. I sent an email to Kevin and told him I didn't remember what happened, but that Tom told me I started to kiss and hug Tom and that I hoped he hadn't noticed, because I felt really bad about this. Tom also told me he used his hand to make me come, but I stopped him before I came (I don't know why, he just told me I made him stop). All the while Kevin was in the same room and heard it all.
Kevin emailed back to me that there had been a time he'd been in love with me (he never told me and I never noticed it. We've been best friends since we've met and always had great times). When we had drugs and were laying next to eachother on my bed, his feelings of love came back, and at a time I started to kiss him (Tom didn't remember this either), he didn't want that at all, because of the state we were in and because he knew I wasn't myself at that time, so he pushed me away and switched places with Tom. When I started to kiss with Tom, Kevin felt really guilty, because he knew the "real" me wouldn't want to do that at all and he tried to stop me, but apparently I reacted very irritated. Kevin said right then his feelings for me just disappeared immediately and that he wished his trip would stop and that he could leave.
So for Kevin this is all very emotional, because he apparently likes me more than I ever knew and I guess that he still has those feelings for me (although he said that he didn't have those feelings anymore). For him it must be very confusing, so I guess that's why he doesn't want to contact me, so he can figure things out for himself.
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wstarc5
cultivator
Registered: 10/19/07
Posts: 65
Last seen: 16 years, 2 months
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Re: I did something really bad and forgot that it happened [Re: Maron]
#7681034 - 11/26/07 09:24 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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He was trying to do the right thing and you end up replacing him with his friend. He is definently gonna be mad but you were on shrooms so he'll get over it and is probably still interested I would guess.
-------------------- Drugs have taught an entire generation of American kids the metric system.
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Maron
Stranger

Registered: 11/23/07
Posts: 11
Last seen: 16 years, 1 month
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Re: I did something really bad and forgot that it happened [Re: wstarc5]
#7681083 - 11/26/07 09:34 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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Probably it wouldn't have mattered at all who was next to me. I just started kissing randomly I guess. Maybe I would have kissed a complete stranger as well. But as I don't remember, it's just hypothetically speaking. The one thing I do know is that I didn't want to kiss Kevin, and I didn't want to kiss and do the things I did with Tom at all.
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Ness1
Spreading myinvisible wings


Registered: 10/01/07
Posts: 621
Last seen: 16 years, 1 month
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Re: I did something really bad and forgot that it happened [Re: wstarc5]
#7681088 - 11/26/07 09:36 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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I can pretty much guarantee he still has feelings for you.
-------------------- I know what they'll find, it's in their mind, it's what they want to see. Spare me from the light, here comes the night and here I'll stay, waiting for darkness.
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wstarc5
cultivator
Registered: 10/19/07
Posts: 65
Last seen: 16 years, 2 months
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Re: I did something really bad and forgot that it happened [Re: Maron]
#7681094 - 11/26/07 09:36 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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And thats why you don't trip with strangers.
-------------------- Drugs have taught an entire generation of American kids the metric system.
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emilbus
Drunk

Registered: 10/01/06
Posts: 1,113
Loc: Texas
Last seen: 16 years, 1 month
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Re: I did something really bad and forgot that it happened [Re: Maron]
#7681098 - 11/26/07 09:37 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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both kevin and tom are retarded.
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  You look down at me and you see a fool You look up at me and you see a god You look straight at me and you see yourself
Edited by emilbus (11/26/07 09:38 AM)
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BrandNoob
The REALAmerican Hero!


Registered: 07/15/07
Posts: 717
Loc: Potland, OR
Last seen: 13 years, 9 months
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Re: I did something really bad and forgot that it happened [Re: Maron]
#7681134 - 11/26/07 09:44 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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Ha! He just learned that trying to be "the nice guy" is a big mistake. Maybe he's over you, maybe not. My guess is not. He's probably gonna act like a jerk for a while because he's upset, and then he'll probably act like a jerk in a really fake way to be the "bad boy" he thinks you want him to be. Man, this sounds so high school it's ridiculous!
My theory: Kevin's probably gay and doesn't know it yet. That's not to say he doesn't have strong feelings for you - he obviously does. But he's way confused. He thinks he's in love with a girl right now, but he's gonna like boys later. Just a theory, not necessarily truth.
PS To everyone who's adamantly asserting their own heterosexuality: The squeakiest wheels just want to get greased!
-------------------- All posts were channeled through the user by typing the thoughts of telepathic beings. All photos are of paranormal origin and do not represent the physical world, as we know it. BrandNoob shall not be held accountable for the actions of deceased or hyperdimensional individuals.
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wstarc5
cultivator
Registered: 10/19/07
Posts: 65
Last seen: 16 years, 2 months
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Re: I did something really bad and forgot that it happened [Re: BrandNoob]
#7681159 - 11/26/07 09:56 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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Well it is definently highschool.
-------------------- Drugs have taught an entire generation of American kids the metric system.
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champ
pudding pop



Registered: 06/27/01
Posts: 787
Loc: unknown trashscape
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Re: I did something really bad and forgot that it happened [Re: Maron]
#7681194 - 11/26/07 10:06 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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Whatever happens, don't be embarrassed and be honest with yourself about why it could have happened.
You might want to look some more into the "not remembering" part because no matter what drugs you are on, engaging in sexual behavior without being fully conscious of it (or being able to admit to yourself the extent to which you were conscious of it) is trouble. You are lucky that these guys were your friends and didn't take advantage of you or hurt you.
I'm not judging you in any way but you said that you have issues relating to sexuality and then you blank out a sexual experience while you are on drugs--it might be a good idea to talk to a therapist of some sort if there's any danger of this becoming a pattern or being repeated.
What you want to avoid is getting into a cycle of being afraid of sexual situations and thus not taking responsibility for your own sexuality, then maybe you're getting high or drunk and putting yourself in risky situations where you are not in control/not responsible for your own actions, etc.
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sirbojangles
h20

Registered: 10/22/05
Posts: 1,298
Loc: inside a transparent eyeb...
Last seen: 10 years, 8 months
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Re: I did something really bad and forgot that it happened [Re: Maron]
#7681373 - 11/26/07 11:06 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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if i was in "kevin's" place...
and ive been in similar situations
...it would have been pretty traumatizing
having friends of the opposite sex is a tricky and emotionally confusing situation
its a shame, really
but time is always the best medicine
ive gotten through all the shit ive been through with my incredibly adorable and amazing female friends
"kevin" will get over it
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DreamSignals
Morphogenetic Truth


Registered: 01/14/07
Posts: 476
Loc: the void
Last seen: 13 years, 2 months
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Re: I did something really bad and forgot that it happened [Re: sirbojangles]
#7681799 - 11/26/07 01:10 PM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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I think mushrooms have a strong psychic effects on the trippers. I know because me and my good friend did an eight of mushrooms with one of his friends, and it was her first time. I think we were both mildly attracted to her sexually, and during the trip our desire for her become very real, but not because of us, but because she started to get really horny and started stripping, suggested a three-way right then and there (we were in a public park) and then jumped into the river half naked. She had paranoid delusions after that. I think both of our desires combined with her sexual frustration (she also had "sex" issues, since her last boyfriend took advantage of her while she was drunk). She ended up screaming for hours until cops came over, and took her to the hospital. She claims she doesn't remember ANY OF IT, so I find your story very similar. I will also add that when she took off her top the energy around us got extremely primal, as if we were pure instinct at that point, very very weird. We could also "predict" the waves of screaming and nonsense a few moments before they happened because the energy around us would get tenser and tenser.
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Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the law. (93) Love is the law, love under will. (93 93/93)
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