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mushroomplume
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Laws of Attraction (Ugly People)
#7647012 - 11/17/07 08:52 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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How exactly do the laws of physical attraction work?
I realize that beauty lay in the eye of the beholder, but everyone must have some general idea as to who is actually beautiful. A friend of mine the other day (who is not a great looker) commented on how a girl he saw looked cute and I agreed that she was cute, but I would never hit on her. She wasn't cute enough I guess. How can this person elicit a genuine fondness from my friend, but nothing from me?
How does physical attraction work? What are these standards that most people seem to hold? What dictates these standards?
Discuss!
*How do ugly people fit into this framework? Are they actually attracted to one another?
Edited by oliveplume (11/17/07 09:18 AM)
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Diploid
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Re: Laws of Attraction (Ugly People) [Re: mushroomplume]
#7647031 - 11/17/07 09:06 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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Since much (most? all?) of what sexual animals do is ultimately driven by the evolutionary imperative to reproduce, a species finds attractive the characteristics typical of an individual able to successfully rear young.
For men, that's women with such things as large, full breasts capable of feeding babies, and clean healthy skin and hair which suggests someone who will live long enough for the baby to grow to independence.
For women, that's big, muscular men who are able to hunt successfully and defend her and the baby.
In humans there are exceptions because we have complex psyches and we're swayed a little by the cultural norms that wired up our neurons as we grew from infanthood.
-------------------- Republican Values: 1) You can't get married to your spouse who is the same sex as you. 2) You can't have an abortion no matter how much you don't want a child. 3) You can't have a certain plant in your possession or you'll get locked up with a rapist and a murderer. 4) We need a smaller, less-intrusive government.
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Silversoul
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Re: Laws of Attraction (Ugly People) [Re: Diploid]
#7647040 - 11/17/07 09:12 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
Diploid said: For women, that's big, muscular men who are able to hunt successfully and defend her and the baby.
It seems that's more true during adolescence than later in life. I think women's tastes tend to evolve more towards intelligence and dependability as they get older, reflecting a similar evolutionary move in human society.
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mushroomplume
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Re: Laws of Attraction (Ugly People) [Re: Silversoul]
#7647049 - 11/17/07 09:16 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
It seems that's more true during adolescence than later in life. I think women's tastes tend to evolve more towards intelligence and dependability as they get older, reflecting a similar evolutionary move in human society.
I don't want to get off track here. But I agree with Silversoul. I do not know any grown women who go for this kind of guy.
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Diploid
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Re: Laws of Attraction (Ugly People) [Re: Silversoul]
#7647067 - 11/17/07 09:28 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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I think women's tastes tend to evolve more towards intelligence and dependability as they get olde
Yeah. Generally whatever the woman thinks will give her and her babies security is what she will find attractive. Intelligence and dependability sure qualify.
-------------------- Republican Values: 1) You can't get married to your spouse who is the same sex as you. 2) You can't have an abortion no matter how much you don't want a child. 3) You can't have a certain plant in your possession or you'll get locked up with a rapist and a murderer. 4) We need a smaller, less-intrusive government.
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vaportrail
upandaway



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Re: Laws of Attraction (Ugly People) [Re: Diploid]
#7647123 - 11/17/07 09:58 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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Physical attraction is just the first step. If both people are ugly then they are forced to look past it immediately, to see other qualities that could be found attractive? If they are willing to accept their own imperfections, they may be willing to dig a little deeper. Actually, during my bout of acne in high school, I remember attracting a lot of trolls but I never accepted my skin problems as being permanent or part of who I was, and therefore never lowered my physical standards. gross
-------------------- and the hippos were boiled in their tanks
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery



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Re: Laws of Attraction (Ugly People) [Re: mushroomplume]
#7647186 - 11/17/07 10:32 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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Well now it seems there is someone for almost everyone. I think people subconsciously evaluate themselves and go for others who are within that range, looks wise.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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NiamhNyx
I'm NOT a 'he'



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Re: Laws of Attraction (Ugly People) [Re: Diploid]
#7647607 - 11/17/07 01:31 PM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
Diploid said:
For women, that's big, muscular men who are able to hunt successfully and defend her and the baby.
For me, this couldn't be farther from the truth. I find big, muscular men repulsive for the most part. I've tended to be attracted to men on the leaner side of things. Not that they have to fit into a narrow category of body type - I've been attracted to fairly diverse body types. The unifying quality is that they are all intellectuals and/or musicians, and thus tend not to spend much time in the gym. I find that a lot of people are basically looking for themselves reflected in another person, or they are attracted to people who appear to have some quality they aspire to have themselves.
Wasn't there some study done that showed that a big element in whether or not a person is considered attractive is having a symmetrical face? There's also the factor of how the way a person dresses and presents themselves reflects what values and interests they have, so we narrow the scope and go for people that represent themselves as likely being like ourselves.
So, symmetry and the image of potentially shared worldview... those are my best guesses.
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NiamhNyx
I'm NOT a 'he'



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Re: Laws of Attraction (Ugly People) [Re: Icelander]
#7647617 - 11/17/07 01:36 PM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
Icelander said: Well now it seems there is someone for almost everyone. I think people subconsciously evaluate themselves and go for others who are within that range, looks wise.
Yep. If you are constantly chasing after someone totally out of your league, even if you get them, there is always the risk that they will find someone better at any time. People tend to aim where they think they're at to prevent this kind of rejection. Which is funny, because by now I've dated a number of people a couple years after meeting them and thinking they were way out of my league. Turns out they weren't at all, and were really even flakier and more confused than I was. Funny how wrong one's perception can be!
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Visionary Tools



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Re: Laws of Attraction (Ugly People) [Re: NiamhNyx]
#7647645 - 11/17/07 01:45 PM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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I guess I'm lucky. I never notice how someone looks, and I'm far more interested to hear them talk, as I find their articulation is a better guide of how attractive they are.
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OrgoneConclusion
Blue Fish Group



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Re: Laws of Attraction (Ugly People) [Re: mushroomplume]
#7647794 - 11/17/07 02:38 PM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
How exactly do the laws of physical attraction work?
Well, if you have an 'outie' and she has an 'innie' you are good to go.
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NiamhNyx
I'm NOT a 'he'



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Those are some pretty rigid standards, Orgone. Lighten up! I don't know how anyone will ever live up to the unreasonable fantasy of ideal womanhood you've constructed.
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OrgoneConclusion
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Re: Laws of Attraction (Ugly People) [Re: NiamhNyx]
#7647881 - 11/17/07 03:13 PM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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STOP IT!, You're killing me!
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NiamhNyx
I'm NOT a 'he'



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I am a mastermind of sarcasm. I can't help it, it just oozes out of me like an unpleasant odor.
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Icelander
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Re: Laws of Attraction (Ugly People) [Re: NiamhNyx]
#7647908 - 11/17/07 03:25 PM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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Those are some pretty rigid standards, Orgone. Lighten up! I don't know how anyone will ever live up to the unreasonable fantasy of ideal womanhood you've constructed. 
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
Edited by Icelander (11/17/07 03:26 PM)
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OrgoneConclusion
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Re: Laws of Attraction (Ugly People) [Re: NiamhNyx]
#7647914 - 11/17/07 03:26 PM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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We might just get along yet.
My sarcasm used to be so acerbic that it ate through the human psyche like hydrochloric acid and I was forced to mellow up a bit.

Artist's rendering of Shmoopy's sarcasm.
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Edited by OrgoneConclusion (11/18/07 02:51 PM)
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Merkin
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Re: Laws of Attraction (Ugly People) [Re: mushroomplume]
#7648313 - 11/17/07 05:34 PM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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symmetry, geometry, pattern, shape.
-------------------- Wheels of cheese wheeels of cheeeeese!!!
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Rahz
Alive Again


Registered: 11/10/05
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Re: Laws of Attraction (Ugly People) [Re: mushroomplume]
#7650866 - 11/18/07 12:34 PM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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Some guys like big women, and call the girls I like "sticks".

But I think being able to breathe is the only real qualification on a visceral level. We will choose beauty over ugly, but physically we are looking for what we are not.
Imagine two naked people. One large woman, maybe 300 lbs. Paint her any way you would like, but still ugly. One harry man in reasonable shape. They both bend over and longingly look at you over their shoulder... "I'm ready"
Which do you choose?
-------------------- rahz comfort pleasure power love truth awareness peace "You’re not looking close enough if you can only see yourself in people who look like you." —Ayishat Akanbi
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Icelander
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Now he's modeled himself after me.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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AnarchoTrip
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Re: Laws of Attraction (Ugly People) [Re: Icelander]
#7652792 - 11/18/07 09:41 PM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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I think there's a big difference between animalistic sexual attraction and attraction-otherwise. I'm noticing this in my social interactions lately. I often hang out at my college, partying and drunkenly-hooking up with sexually attractive girls.
However, I'm absolutely madly in love with a specific girl and the basis for that attraction is not on sexual attraction.
(hooray polygamy!)
there's a difference; which one are you questioning about? I assume simple sexual attraction? I'd say symmetry and physical similarities.
peace.
-------------------- YIPPIE!
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OrgoneConclusion
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Re: Laws of Attraction (Ugly People) [Re: AnarchoTrip]
#7652832 - 11/18/07 09:52 PM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
However, I'm absolutely madly in love with a specific girl and the basis for that attraction is not on sexual attraction.
Have you ever been madly in love with a man? If not, it is highly likely that the basis for your attraction IS sexual.
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AnarchoTrip
Young Blood



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Quote:
OrgoneConclusion said:
Quote:
However, I'm absolutely madly in love with a specific girl and the basis for that attraction is not on sexual attraction.
Have you ever been madly in love with a man? If not, it is highly likely that the basis for your attraction IS sexual.
I have unfortunately never experienced such a love. However, I'm certainly not opposed to the idea. I just happened to meet a girl first. And, of course there is sexual attraction--before i got to know this girl, i was sexually attracted. Now, however, it's transcended purely sexual attraction (not that it's abscent of sexual attraction).
-------------------- YIPPIE!
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