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Offlineepilectric
tea sipping
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Registered: 06/28/06
Posts: 1,023
Loc: Vienna
Last seen: 13 hours, 35 minutes
heroic dose or not?
    #7618160 - 11/10/07 10:34 AM (16 years, 2 months ago)

my life is spiralling downward at the moment
i smoke a lot of pot, i drink a lot of caffeine, i don't work, i should do something for school, but i can't motivate myself
in fact, i can't motivate myself for anything right now
i have several anxiety issues and i'm just not comfortable with myself, i have loop-thoughts all the time, which i can't escape
i have trouble being around people, i'm worried, what they think about me, that they think i'm stupid, that i sa stupid stuff, i'm just totally insecure
in fact i know, that i shouldn't care about ridiculous stuff like that, but i can't stop my thoughts from being thought

i'm 19
with 16 i started experimenting with shrooms, acid, e and speed
had a couple of nice shroom trips, a couple of bad ones too,
never a higher dose than 1-3 grams
had a couple of nice acid trips, a couple of bad ones too, the highest dose being about 200 mics (was my best trip so far)
i felt really good at that time, loaded with energy and positive thinking
recently i can't even handle low doses of any of the two,
i do not even dare to take higher doses anymore, although i actually would really like to

i thought, that maybe a dose of about 5 grams of mushrooms may help myself getting my life into a better direction, override all of that brainshit going on at the moment, discard some of the waste, defragment my personality,
get more confident, and overall more of a stable person

do you think, that this is total bullshit and that i should work at myself without the "aid" of drugs and try to better the situation before digging back into psychedelics?

or do you think, that it may help?

since i never experienced egodeath on mushrooms, i don't know what to expect, will the conditioned thought patterns of my brain be ignored somehow?
will the anxiety and the fear be overcome by the psilocybin?
or will it just turn worse?
which of the two possibilities do you find more reasonable?

and apart from that, any other recommendations to target my life into a better direction are welcome

thanks in advance


--------------------
i :heartpump: shroomery

https://soundcloud.com/cyberhops/tracks


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InvisibleSophistic Radiance
Free sVs!
Female


Registered: 07/11/06
Posts: 43,135
Loc: Center of the Universe
Re: heroic dose or not? [Re: epilectric]
    #7618176 - 11/10/07 10:38 AM (16 years, 2 months ago)

Psychedelics are a good way to learn, but not a good way to get your life on the right track.


--------------------
Enlil said:
You really are the worst kind of person.



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InvisibleAtheist
Stranger
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Registered: 01/24/06
Posts: 13,705
Loc: USA
Re: heroic dose or not? [Re: epilectric]
    #7618181 - 11/10/07 10:39 AM (16 years, 2 months ago)

sounds like the perfect setup for a badtrip :thumbdown:


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Offlinedirtworshipper
Sitting in the heart cave
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Registered: 05/12/07
Posts: 2,060
Loc: at The Guru's lotus feet
Last seen: 3 years, 3 months
Re: heroic dose or not? [Re: Atheist]
    #7618231 - 11/10/07 10:56 AM (16 years, 2 months ago)

:shrug:

only you can answer your question

in my opinion, psychedelics can greatly improve one's outlook and they can also pick you up out of the gutter. but if you're not ready for them, or don't know how to work with them, they can do much, much worse.

if you have to ask, it might not be the best idea
it might be a good idea to work on yourself without psychedelics first
and then continue working on yourself
and once you've gotten to a point where you don't have to ask these kinds of questions, go for it

:smileyfrog:

"You can't rip the skin off of a snake"


--------------------

“You've got as many lives as you like, and more, even ones you don't want.” - George Harrison


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Offlineg00ru
lit pants tit licker
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Registered: 08/09/07
Posts: 21,088
Loc: georgia, us
Last seen: 5 years, 1 month
Re: heroic dose or not? [Re: Atheist]
    #7618235 - 11/10/07 10:57 AM (16 years, 2 months ago)

Psychedelics won't fix your life. Get your shit together before you trip again. Maybe stop smoking also, I don't know your whole situation but smoking can hinder your ambition more than you know.


--------------------
check out my music!
drowse in prison and your waking will be but loss


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Offlineheadofmike
trich. farmer
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Registered: 08/09/07
Posts: 374
Last seen: 8 years, 5 months
Re: heroic dose or not? [Re: g00ru]
    #7618542 - 11/10/07 12:21 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

You'll just end up having one of those trips where you try to kill yourself. Don't trip. But then again. A terrible trip could be just what you need to get back in the groove. You'll trip get thoughts of self loathing, and extermly low self esteem and when you come down (if you don't off yourself) you'll say "what the fuck have I been doing with myself".


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InvisibleMOTH
Wild Woman
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Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
Re: heroic dose or not? [Re: epilectric]
    #7618591 - 11/10/07 12:36 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

I think you're setting yourself up for a serious ass-whooping.  I agree with what someone else said that psychedelics won't fix your life for you.  I believe people fare best by working on their lives and making changes and improvements before doing a lot of tripping.   

That said, I took my first 5 g dose when I was in a bad spot similar to yours.  I took them foolishly, and had a horrific experience.  I was in hell, no doubt about it.  Nonetheless, having myself completely broken down into nothingness changed me for the better.  It was the "the gates are now open" trip that altered my life for good. 

I'm not suggesting what you should do, either way.  In my opinion it sounds like you shouldn't trip until your life is more stable.  On the other hand, I didn't listen to this advice either and I'm glad I didn't. :shrug:

Do what you feel, but no matter what, don't blame the shrooms if you come down and your reality is completely shattered.


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InvisibleTripityDooDaDay
Prick
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Registered: 09/14/06
Posts: 2,046
Re: heroic dose or not? [Re: MOTH]
    #7618863 - 11/10/07 01:37 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

Personally I think laying off of the weed and getting a job and or doing something about school will do more for you than tripping at this point in your life.

You sound like you already know this yourself but simply lack any real motivation. I can relate.

A heroic dose could go either way. It can be the kick in the ass that gets you off of your ass or a sudden plunge further down the spiral. My personal guess is the later.

If you go for it, a GOOD sitter is an absolute requirement in your particular case. That's not just for your on safety but also for the safety of others unless you plan to go so deep in the wilderness you can't possibly encounter another.


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OfflineRobert Jarvik
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Registered: 06/22/07
Posts: 163
Loc: -
Last seen: 11 years, 5 months
Re: heroic dose or not? *DELETED* [Re: TripityDooDaDay]
    #7619678 - 11/10/07 05:21 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

Post deleted by Robert Jarvik

Reason for deletion: ...



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OfflineMarioTrip
since84
Male

Registered: 10/21/07
Posts: 2,207
Loc: 69 w/ you
Last seen: 15 years, 4 months
Re: heroic dose or not? [Re: Robert Jarvik]
    #7619694 - 11/10/07 05:29 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

Go ahead and trip :thumbup:


--------------------
I'm Livin' It, distribute it
The streets are inhibited
By cut throat niggas just like me
that out there getting dividends


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