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todesengel
the chinese chicken

Registered: 08/04/05
Posts: 809
Last seen: 4 years, 2 months
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Please help
#7617448 - 11/10/07 01:40 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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I think I am depressed.
I find everything boring. Nothing is that fun. I don't have any interest in finding a job. I don't have much interest in anything. I do almost nothing all day. I am constantly at war with my thoughts. I have looked at suicide as a way out.
I don't know what to do. I just wanna cry.
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Konyap


Registered: 06/30/07
Posts: 33,945
Loc: Planet Piss
Last seen: 4 years, 2 months
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i find the more i listen to myself the more i am lying sometimes you really gotta look at what everyone else feels once in awhile, since it is your reality too, you might not ever grasp it, but youve imagined right?
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todesengel
the chinese chicken

Registered: 08/04/05
Posts: 809
Last seen: 4 years, 2 months
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Re: Please help [Re: Konyap]
#7617493 - 11/10/07 02:08 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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I don't know exactly what you mean.
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Konyap


Registered: 06/30/07
Posts: 33,945
Loc: Planet Piss
Last seen: 4 years, 2 months
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its jus like i say how much i care and shit but then i look at everyone else and they care just as much but they express it differently, thats when i feel selfish
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Konyap


Registered: 06/30/07
Posts: 33,945
Loc: Planet Piss
Last seen: 4 years, 2 months
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Re: Please help [Re: Konyap]
#7617528 - 11/10/07 02:39 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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i mean say what you will about your own opposing ideas but when its all coming from you, what side is there? it is your responsibility to decide, not the variables playing out in your noggin
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todesengel
the chinese chicken

Registered: 08/04/05
Posts: 809
Last seen: 4 years, 2 months
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Re: Please help [Re: Konyap]
#7617556 - 11/10/07 03:07 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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I don't really know why I feel this way. I think about how fun it was to be younger. I think of how life sucks because working full time takes everything way.
I can't think of having to work that much...
I can't stand not feeling the way I used to.
I don't know what to do.
I think I should cry
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MushroomTrip
Dr. Teasy Thighs



Registered: 12/02/05
Posts: 14,794
Loc: red panda village
Last seen: 2 years, 10 months
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I think you should consider what you really want from life, and if that's too hard to figure out right now, at least try to determine what is it that you don't want from life. It seems to me, until now from that data I gathered from you, that you don't want to work as much as you do because you need more free time. Well then do something about it! If you really want a change in this domain, you will be able to find alternatives. Crying might help when you're depressed, but if you overdo it, it only makes things worse because it gets you in a state of self pity which makes things more ambiguous and unreasonable than they actually are. So don't indulge yourself in that state, and start acting upon your problems.
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   All this time I've loved you And never known your face All this time I've missed you And searched this human race Here is true peace Here my heart knows calm Safe in your soul Bathed in your sighs
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Cameron
Too Many Words



Registered: 10/31/07
Posts: 4,437
Loc: Canada
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Your thread caught my attention because I feel that I'm in a similar state of mind. I thought about describing my situation to you and trying to draw comparisons and offer advice, but I don't think that will help, so I'll just try to address some of the things you've already said.
First off, you seem to be placing a lot of emphasis on working and the negative impact it has on you. What kind of work do you do? Do you enjoy it? Obviously, work is a big chunk of our life, and if we don't enjoy what we do, chances are that we won't be very happy people. Myself, I work as a cook at the moment; it's not my ideal job, but it's tolerable work. Whenever I feel down about my job, I take comfort in the idea that I have a life time ahead of me to find the job that I love to do (I believe there's one of those out there for all of us, if we make the effort to find it). How about you?
Next, what did you used to do when you were younger? What kind of interests did you have? Did you have many friends? If so, do you still hang with them? If you used to enjoy life in general, and you're finding it less than enjoyable since then, what's changed in that time? I know that I've caught myself reminiscing all too often, comparing the drab aspects of my life at the moment to (what I would have myself believe to be) the endless joy I used to experience as a young child. Truth be told, I'm probably just as well off right now as I used to be, but I have the tendency of highlighting my positive memories and omitting my negative ones.
Anyways, that's a start. I have a hard time articulating my thoughts, and my advice is usually pretty bad, but I'm trying. Get back to me, and take it easy dude.
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TheLightIsOn
In the worst ofall your fears


Registered: 08/10/05
Posts: 358
Last seen: 12 years, 2 months
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Quote:
todesengel said: I am constantly at war with my thoughts.
What do your thoughts consist of?
-PEACE
-------------------- AFOAF's current multi-grow log "In the privince of the mind, what is believed to be true is true or becomes true, within limits to be found experientially and experimentally. These limits are further beliefs to be transcended. In the province of the mind, there are no limits." -John C. Lilly
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