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elbisivni
Registered: 10/01/06
Posts: 2,839
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Representing others
#7599784 - 11/05/07 07:04 PM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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Does anyone else get a little peeved when other people try representing you to others?
Friends tell their friends that they would like me for such-and-such reasons. That places on me an expectation based on information that isn't even necessarily accurate. This doesn't bother me much because I have no problem disappointing people I have no prior desire to impress.
Sometimes a sibling or a parent will share a bit of information about me that's supposed to bring me into a conversation with people I don't know well. I can appreciate their intent, but if I were interested in entering the conversation I would have taken it upon myself to do so in my own way. Again, their assessment may not even be correct, so you must politely correct them and they begin to argue - as if they really believe they know you better than you!
The people I've known have never understood why I didn't care for them talking about me, usually in my absence. It's not because I'm paranoid or insecure (though I may be a bit of both), it's because I find it to be disrespectful, offensive even.
When I tell stories of experiences with friends, I reflexively tell them in such a way as to not give away the identities of the people involved, unless it is somehow pertinent.
It also serves as a warning sign to me that somebody has a rigid perception of me, in that they think they can factually define specific aspects of my personality. It all depends on the phrasing, but rarely have I heard people phrase things in a detectably thoughtful manner.
Thoughts?
-------------------- From dust you are made and to dust you shall return.
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Clean
the lense


Registered: 05/11/03
Posts: 2,374
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Re: Representing others [Re: elbisivni]
#7600251 - 11/05/07 08:42 PM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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I think you are very keen to notice this...but i won't tell anyone. 

I get some sort of feeling that seems like the first steps of an epiphany when I think about how much time and energy people spend gossiping and simply making shit up about their "friends" in order to justify their own selfish desires and interpersonal power trips.
There is a certain pride that seeps out of some people when they talk as if they know a person from the inside out.
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elbisivni
Registered: 10/01/06
Posts: 2,839
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Re: Representing others [Re: Clean]
#7601219 - 11/06/07 01:05 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
Clean said: I think you are very keen to notice this...but i won't tell anyone. 
thanks
-------------------- From dust you are made and to dust you shall return.
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery



Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 95,368
Loc: underbelly
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Re: Representing others [Re: elbisivni]
#7601774 - 11/06/07 09:28 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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Does anyone else get a little peeved when other people try representing you to others?
No, why should I care?
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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Boundless
Stranger
Registered: 01/04/06
Posts: 38
Last seen: 15 years, 11 months
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Re: Representing others [Re: Icelander]
#7601912 - 11/06/07 10:14 AM (16 years, 2 months ago) |
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no matter what they do no matter what they say they cannot follow you nor interupt the day
if you feel a bother then you let them win and dont just pretend KNOW your clean of sin
you know its pure and true and its right you have heart Theres only but one way and forgiveness is the start
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