long story short, my first love was a total bitch who started doing meth really heavy and ripped our relationship to shreds. when she would come down, she'd want me back and be the sweetest girl... then she'd get high again and be a complete bitch to me again.
I was depressed, and stuck in a small town, so I moved to a bigger one about an hour away. pretty much lose all contact with girl. she'd literally show up at my place clearly looking for a "safe" place to be for a comedown... stay there and be a complete miserable bitch until the cravings became too much then she'd leave.
I was fooling myself thinking I loved her and I was helping her by being somewhere she could go... this goes on for about a year. she then starts showing up more often, is looking a lot better, acting better, it seems she's really getting clean and wants to try to build a relationship again.
ok cool, whatever.
she lives with me for a few weeks... then we have dinner at her mom's, who lived in the same town I did. When we get there I need to use the bathroom. her mom says 'Oh use *girls* bathroom, it's through her bedroom'... now this is the first (and only) time I've been at her mom's apt. i noticed that she had gone to her bedroom when we first got there, and had me unpack the beer into the fridge (keeping me out of it) and she closed the door when she came out of it, when it wasn't closed in the first place.
I walk into the bedroom. it's filled with pics of her and another guy. another guy's clothes are all over the place. men's razors, body wash, deodorant etc in the bathroom.
We go through the dinner, and she KNOWS I know. unfortunately we took her car and I need to get back home. the drive back all hell breaks loose. she's been living with the other guy with her mom for the past year and half. I'd had enough. she was out that night. we don't talk for almost a year.
now this is the part that REALLY fucked me up. literally the last day I was in my old apt, I'm packing up the last boxes, going in and out packing it into my car, so my door is propped open. I walk in to grab some boxes turn around to walk out and she's in my doorway. crying. saying she needs to talk.
I can see she's clearly drunk and shouldn't be driving... but like I said I was moving so I didn't even have anywhere to sit... and I don't want her to know where my new place is, so we go for a drive in my car, to an empty parking lot. She's just crying uncontrollably, drinking beer fast, I can tell she's coming down from tweak too.
finally she's like "I need to tell you something..." cries more... then says "i'm pregnant." I'm freaked. and pissed. cuz there's NO WAY it was me. (unless she was pregnant for over 9 months and still wasn't showing) I was like "no you're not, you're drinking and smoking and you look like you haven't slept for 3 days..." and she just starts crying again. and drops the bomb "I'm going to abort it"
that totally just fucked me up. I mean, not that I'm totally against abortion, but I feel that she should have kept it or at least gave it up for adoption. I mean, that's a LIFE. someone didn't even get a chance to live. I'm sure it was probably for the best, since she was drinking and doing drugs while pregnant.
It just royally fucked me up. I mean, there was no point in telling me, as it wasn't mine and I wasn't even in her life.
and now girls just freak me out.
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Anonymous said:
It just royally fucked me up. I mean, there was no point in telling me, as it wasn't mine and I wasn't even in her life.
Yes there was a point. Just by giving a nutcase like that the time of day, you are a tool. She was hoping to tool you into helping her out, because it's worked before.
Jesus christ people, keep fiends like this out of your life. It's not hard. Set higher standards for yourself and the company you keep, and there's no way anyone can 'royally fuck you up'
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