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Offlinehaymaker
Mr Psychonaut
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Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 10/26/07
Posts: 1,374
Loc: United Kingdom Flag
Last seen: 4 years, 2 months
Re: I'm gay. [Re: Liz]
    #7567240 - 10/27/07 04:36 PM (16 years, 3 months ago)

your a braver person than me. Loves a wierd thing, a love and hate relationship for me, but it sounds like your doing pretty well.

You sound happy :smile:


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"Make hay while the sun shines"
My Trade List


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InvisibleCherryBomM
Yoga Gypsy
Female User Gallery

Registered: 12/26/98
Posts: 11,177
Loc: Ontario
Re: I'm gay. [Re: haymaker]
    #7567762 - 10/27/07 07:34 PM (16 years, 3 months ago)

Wow, good for you!  I'm so glad that you and Kevin are so amazingly supportive of each other.  It's incredible, really... THAT is what love is all about.

Congratulations?  :hug:  You are awesome.


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InvisibleMOTH
Wild Woman
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Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
Re: I'm gay. [Re: CherryBom]
    #7567979 - 10/27/07 09:02 PM (16 years, 3 months ago)

Thanks Bom!  I LOVE being gay.  :grin:  The pieces just fit...


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OfflineMocha Bear
BHP
Male


Registered: 09/11/07
Posts: 831
Loc: Mississippi
Last seen: 3 years, 9 months
Re: I'm gay. [Re: MOTH]
    #7568170 - 10/27/07 10:18 PM (16 years, 3 months ago)

That's awesome! Congrats and enjoy your new found freedom!!! :smile::thumbup::grin:


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The love you take is equal to the love you make....


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OfflineMK Ultra
Stranger

Registered: 09/15/07
Posts: 70
Last seen: 14 years, 9 months
Re: I'm gay. [Re: Liz]
    #7568726 - 10/28/07 03:44 AM (16 years, 3 months ago)

Maybe I'm a bit confused, but the thread is titled "I'm Gay." But you're attracted to women and feminine men...but mostly women? Maybe I'm missing something?

Well, whatever it is, I'm glad you felt comfortable enough on this forum to share it. Just go with what feels right, not the images we're constantly bombarded with regarding what we should be striving for as men or women. Some things are meant to be shared and some are not, and only YOU can gauge whether this is something that needs telling to family, friends, and the world. "Coming out" can be liberating, but it's not right for all people in all situations. Do whatever's gonna be less stressful in the long run and make the most of life now, cause you never know! If a man makes you happy, great! If you like a woman, that's cool too! Go with the flow and just be glad we live in a time when it's relatively less difficult to be who you are sexually. Not that it's easy, but it could be worse.

Congrats for finding yourself!


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InvisibleLiz
Owl Lady
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Registered: 11/16/04
Posts: 6,962
Loc: Massachusetts
Re: I'm gay. [Re: MK Ultra]
    #7568923 - 10/28/07 06:42 AM (16 years, 3 months ago)

MOTH is a girl. Maybe that was what was confusing you?


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Remember, remember the fifth of November
The gunpowder treason and plot.
I see no reason why gunpowder treason
Should ever be forgot.




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OfflineCrystal G
I'm a teapot


Registered: 06/05/07
Posts: 19,584
Loc: outer space
Last seen: 8 months, 5 days
Re: I'm gay. [Re: Liz]
    #7569138 - 10/28/07 08:39 AM (16 years, 3 months ago)

pfft. you should move out to cali--seriously, everybodys there is bisexual at least. makes me feel like the oddball out being straight and all >_>


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InvisibleMOTH
Wild Woman
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Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
Re: I'm gay. [Re: MK Ultra]
    #7569270 - 10/28/07 09:45 AM (16 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

MK Ultra said:
Maybe I'm a bit confused, but the thread is titled "I'm Gay."  But you're attracted to women and feminine men...but mostly women?  Maybe I'm missing something?

Well, whatever it is, I'm glad you felt comfortable enough on this forum to share it.  Just go with what feels right, not the images we're constantly bombarded with regarding what we should be striving for as men or women.  Some things are meant to be shared and some are not, and only YOU can gauge whether this is something that needs telling to family, friends, and the world.  "Coming out" can be liberating, but it's not right for all people in all situations.  Do whatever's gonna be less stressful in the long run and make the most of life now, cause you never know!  If a man makes you happy, great!  If you like a woman, that's cool too!  Go with the flow and just be glad we live in a time when it's relatively less difficult to be who you are sexually.  Not that it's easy, but it could be worse.

Congrats for finding yourself!




Hey.  :smile:  Yeah, I'm biologically female and spiritually and mentally androgynous (I feel at my heart that I embody both male and female aspects), but seem naturally drawn to feminine energy.  It's beautiful to me.  For me, it just seems more natural.  I just love everything that feminine energy has to offer.  I feel uncomfortable when sex is involved with males.  Don't get me wrong; I love men as people, I love to hug and kiss everyone now and feel free to do so, but I cannot be involved with them any longer in a sexual way.  It's just not me. 

As for coming out to my family, that's something I've thought about the past few days.  My parents wouldn't be able to handle hearing that I am gay.  I am their only daughter (I grew up with four younger brothers) and even though they were abusive to me, I know they tried their best as parents and have really changed.  Nonetheless, they hate gay people and believe they are an abomination to GOD.  They are hard enough on me despite thousands of miles seperating us because I refuse to go to church. 

Once Kevin (my partner) and my father got into a discussion about gay people and gay marriage (Kevin being supportive of it), and my dad couldn't contain himself; he started shouting and yelling at Kevin and being really really angry.  It was during what was supposed to be a nice dinner but he'd rather get pissed and furious about our beliefs then enjoy dinner, so I got up and left because I couldn't take the judgement.  Kevin followed soon after realizing the arguement couldn't be resolved peacefully. 

It's that kinda stuff that makes me very reluctant to come out to my family.  I do love them and I like talking to them despite everything, especially because my mom is so lonely.  But at the same time, I'm going to tell them eventually.  Why not.  If they can't handle their only daughter being gay, and would like to disassociate with me because of that, then I don't want associate with those types of people either.  :shrug:  I'm not going to hide myself forever from them.  Eventually the truth will come out.  I will let it happen naturally though.  I am just enjoying my friends knowing at the moment.  They are all very supportive. :heart:


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OfflineDreamer987
The VerbalHerman Munster
Female

Registered: 04/15/03
Posts: 5,326
Loc: Texas
Last seen: 16 years, 1 month
Re: I'm gay. [Re: MOTH]
    #7572333 - 10/29/07 09:22 AM (16 years, 3 months ago)

would it be insensitive to say that this is probably a phase, and you will grow to love the cock again in time? You like chicks better, but i don't see you going lesbian permenently.
Do you still wana cut your boobs off? You were super gung ho about that awhile back.

As i said before, your beyond straight or gay. Your too weird for all of that.


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InvisibleMOTH
Wild Woman
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Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
Re: I'm gay. [Re: Dreamer987]
    #7573279 - 10/29/07 03:05 PM (16 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

Dreamer987 said:
would it be insensitive to say that this is probably a phase, and you will grow to love the cock again in time? You like chicks better, but i don't see you going lesbian permenently.
Do you still wana cut your boobs off? You were super gung ho about that awhile back.

As i said before, your beyond straight or gay. Your too weird for all of that.




I don't have breasts anymore.  Not really.  I am not even a cup size.  I am a size 32 small in "bralette" size, the type that twelve year olds wear.  The universe works in mysterious ways. 

As for this is a "phase" or not, I don't really care.  I know who I am NOW and that's what's important.  Weirdo, yes.  :wink: I've always known that.  I'm sure that I am gay and the more that time goes on, the more settled in this new awareness I feel.  I've never enjoyed having the cock inserted within me.  It feels like I'm being impaled to my doom.  I've just now accepted that it's okay not to like it and that I don't have to, or try and force myself to like it. 

I feel like I could still probably give blow jobs without too many qualms, as favors to people who I love.  It's much less invasive.  It's not like I find the penis a disgusting organ, after all.  It is what it is, a sensitive body part.  I simply don't want it inside of me, banging me up from the inside, that's all.  That does not feel right for me. 

Valid questions and comments, all.  :tongue2:


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InvisibleChiefGreenLeaf

Registered: 01/11/07
Posts: 1,596
Re: I'm gay. [Re: MOTH]
    #7573414 - 10/29/07 03:46 PM (16 years, 3 months ago)

I think you just need to get with a real man :naughty: ...jk
umm I have nothing intelligent to add I guess... so disapointing


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InvisibleMOTH
Wild Woman
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Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
Re: I'm gay. [Re: ChiefGreenLeaf]
    #7573522 - 10/29/07 04:16 PM (16 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

ChiefGreenLeaf said:
I think you just need to get with a real man :naughty: ...jk
umm I have nothing intelligent to add I guess... so disapointing




That's okay, I expected one of those comments from a man.  Thanks for proving me right.  :shrug:  :wink:


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InvisibleLordSenate
One of the Lost
Male User Gallery


Registered: 09/15/02
Posts: 37,093
Loc: First Circle of Hell
Re: I'm gay. [Re: MOTH]
    #7573913 - 10/29/07 06:10 PM (16 years, 3 months ago)

Fortunately, not all men are like that.

There are some gems out there. I only know because im one of them ^_^.

Not because im gay.


Anyhow knowing who you are now, is whats most important.


Edited by LordSenate (10/29/07 06:11 PM)


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OfflineMK Ultra
Stranger

Registered: 09/15/07
Posts: 70
Last seen: 14 years, 9 months
Re: I'm gay. [Re: LordSenate]
    #7575311 - 10/30/07 02:17 AM (16 years, 3 months ago)

When it comes to my sexuality, I feel that people know deep down what it is, but as for telling them in the traditional "coming out" way, it's just not a good idea. I don't need to do so to feel good about myself, and if I DID, it would tarnish the image they have of me and would cause me to worry about what they're thinking all the time, etc. I love my family too much to ever push something like that on them. They aren't "religious" and don't go to church but do believe in God and live in a small farming town where anyone remotely different is singled out, gossipped about, and made to feel like an alien. It just wouldn't be wise.

Everyone's situation is different, though, and it may be that announcing your sexuality to your family would be a cathartic process for you. Ideally, everyone would be 100% honest about all things at all times, but sometimes things are better left unsaid. If their reaction is going to stress you out, make you feel bad about yourself, or cause you to lose them or make them twice as hard on you, maybe it's not the greatest idea to share it with them. I know the gay community stresses the importance of "coming out", being proud of your sexuality, and all that, but again, some things really are better left to the imagination than flaunted about. While most of us are intelligent enough not to care that you might be gay and see it as only one tiny component of who you are, there are those who will take it as a wide-reaching, all-encompassing label and use it to categorize and simplify who you really are. You should weigh the pros and cons before telling the fam, most definitely. Is it more important to be 100% honest about this "secret" by letting them know you're a lesbian, or is it more important to have them in your life the way they are now, not knowing this about you? Tough call either way.

It's your choice and only you can decide what will be the smartest move, but I just wanted to share my perspective, seeing as how I'm coming from a similar place in some ways.

(Oh yeah, sorry for assuming you were a guy, lol! It happens to me all the time and I HATE IT!!!)


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OfflineBooby
Agent Mulder
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Registered: 09/14/05
Posts: 3,781
Last seen: 14 years, 1 month
Re: I'm gay. [Re: MOTH]
    #7575575 - 10/30/07 06:55 AM (16 years, 3 months ago)

Apart from sex the female organs are designed for child bearing. Artificial insemination is the method of choice, I think, for a woman who wants a child without having a husband. (Let's pretend it's a modern world where not having a father -or mother- isn't an issue).

So, I imagine a woman could want a child, without having sex or a partner. And I imagine that a true Gay person would choose a child of their same sex, and therefore if you would prefer a male child, then you are not gay.


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InvisibleCherryBomM
Yoga Gypsy
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Registered: 12/26/98
Posts: 11,177
Loc: Ontario
Re: I'm gay. [Re: Booby]
    #7575953 - 10/30/07 10:15 AM (16 years, 3 months ago)

:what:

That's not true at all.  Gay parents are no different then straight parents.  They just want healthy children.  What does that have to do with anything anyways...?


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OfflineMadtowntripper
Sun-Beams out of Cucumbers
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Registered: 03/06/03
Posts: 21,287
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Last seen: 5 months, 23 days
Re: I'm gay. [Re: Booby]
    #7575966 - 10/30/07 10:19 AM (16 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

Booby said:
So, I imagine a woman could want a child, without having sex or a partner. And I imagine that a true Gay person would choose a child of their same sex, and therefore if you would prefer a male child, then you are not gay.




Thats probably the dumbest thing I've heard today.


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After one comes, through contact with it's administrators, no longer to cherish greatly the law as a remedy in abuses, then the bottle becomes a sovereign means of direct action.  If you cannot throw it at least you can always drink out of it.  - Ernest Hemingway

If it is life that you feel you are missing I can tell you where to find it.  In the law courts, in business, in government.  There is nothing occurring in the streets. Nothing but a dumbshow composed of the helpless and the impotent.    -Cormac MacCarthy

He who learns must suffer. And even in our sleep pain that cannot forget falls drop by drop upon the heart, and in our own despair, against our will, comes wisdom to us by the awful grace of God.  - Aeschylus


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OfflineBooby
Agent Mulder
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Last seen: 14 years, 1 month
Re: I'm gay. [Re: Madtowntripper]
    #7576399 - 10/30/07 12:02 PM (16 years, 3 months ago)

How so?


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InvisibleVeritas
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Registered: 04/15/05
Posts: 11,089
Re: I'm gay. [Re: Booby]
    #7576421 - 10/30/07 12:08 PM (16 years, 3 months ago)

Because your sexual/affectional preference has nothing to do with your preference for the sex of your child. If it did, then every heterosexual man would want to have a daughter, and every heterosexual woman would want to have a son. Your premise is seriously flawed.


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OfflineBooby
Agent Mulder
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Registered: 09/14/05
Posts: 3,781
Last seen: 14 years, 1 month
Re: I'm gay. [Re: CherryBom]
    #7576428 - 10/30/07 12:09 PM (16 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

CherryBom said:
:what:

That's not true at all.  Gay parents are no different then straight parents.




In the context of 'No Discrimination' I suppose you're right.

Quote:

CherryBom said:
They just want healthy children.




Unless they are the type to scam social-security?

Quote:

CherryBom said:
What does that have to do with anything anyways...?




Perhaps Moth with her constant change of direction doesn't realy know her own mind. And I thought I could offer the suggestion that she is more mainstream than she realizes and is just redefining her role as a female in the company of males.


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