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lysergicide
Aurora Borealis


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Sex
#7485561 - 10/04/07 04:29 PM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
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sexuality has, at one time or another, played a strong factor in a lot of peoples lives (probably the majority of western culture). however, i won't state that as a fact. but i also feel that this idea is reflected in the world around us through music, fashion, even social behavior. people seem so fixated on sex.
i have fallen to fetish and fantasy. you probably have too at one point. the question is, do people really draw a line? or do they explore their own sexual desires in their own privacy, but keep it hidden and secure out of shame or embaressment?
we're supposed to have the impression that sex is supposed to be between 2 lovers in love, and that it is a private act of intimacy. but something else, probably clues left all around us in society and culture, tells us that it is dirty, addictive, and exploitive.
does sex ever really ever have to involve love? of course not. sex can be more enjoyable when love is involved, but for the most part, i feel that sex, for most people living without that loving partner, is a self-stimulation tool that they can explore and exploit for their own pleasure. and when isn't sex a self-stimulation tool? do you ever have sex just to please others? very unlikely. for the most part, sex is just our way of feeling good - really good. and a lot of times, people will go through great lengths for that rush, even if it includes spending money, potentially hurting relationships, or even hurting others. (people do that with everything else too, but i'm focusing in on sex here.)
i think that people set up a barrier around themselves concerning sex. the majority of people shy away from talking about topics concerning sex or private moments. people even purposely give off the image of innocence or not sexually-driven, although it is obvious that they are. why do they do this? is it because it's uncomfortable? or is it because society has raised them in that fashion? and if it is uncomfortable, then why? maybe it's because we're ashamed that we're going to great lengths just for a cheap thrill, and we're afraid to look pathetic or desperate.
now, here are some other interesting questions. i want you to reply and clue me in or throw in your opinion just for the sake of the thread.
a) is there really such thing as "i wouldn't have sex with somebody like you, you're like a brother/sister to me?" aka, does a personal relationship (aside from family, concentrating on close friends) really affect the reasons why you wouldn't want to have sex with them? (sexual attraction, not social relationship)
b) even in relationships, do we not, at one time or another, have a sexual desire for somebody other than our own partner?
c) do looks really matter as much as people pretend they do?
d) do we single out people who we are sexually attracted to and meet them just based off of that reason, that they are sexually appealing to us? and do we allow ourselves to open up and relate with them and get along, despite having nothing in common, in order to gain their trust in a meager attempt to get closer to them, to get closer to that fantasy?
e) how many people tease themselves through obscure behaviors to exploit certain sexual desires, and what do you think is the real percentage of people living with some kind of sexual fetish?
f) and lastly, why is sex such an importance in todays world... in media, in culture, in society?
this thread is just my own personal ramblings. don't think that anything i have stated is a fact, but it's my own thought to ponder at the moment, and i want to see what you think. thanks if you've gotten this far.
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WScott
´ ɑ `▽ ᑲᓇᑕ



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Joe Rogan seems to think that sex (and how it feels the way it does) is a biological trick (made by whom?) made to speed reproduction up.
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery



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Great topic.
a) see (c
b) yes
c)yes
d)yes
e)yes, 100%
f)death anxiety.
This is from a mans perspective. I suspect a couple of these answers might differ if I were female.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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lysergicide
Aurora Borealis


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Quote:
Icelander said: Great topic.
a) see (c
b) yes
c)yes
d)yes
e)yes, 100%
f)death anxiety.
This is from a mans perspective. I suspect a couple of these answers might differ if I were female.
may i see your reasoning for questions a, c, d, e? not that i doubt you in the least, but i want to see your reasons why, or at least clue me in to this funky phenomenon known as sexual attraction.
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Veritas

Registered: 04/15/05
Posts: 11,089
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Quote:
a) is there really such thing as "i wouldn't have sex with somebody like you, you're like a brother/sister to me?" aka, does a personal relationship (aside from family, concentrating on close friends) really affect the reasons why you wouldn't want to have sex with them? (sexual attraction, not social relationship)
I'd say that it is more the other way around, IOW, you are more likely to become "just friends" with someone to whom you are not sexually attracted.
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b) even in relationships, do we not, at one time or another, have a sexual desire for somebody other than our own partner?
Definitely. We are animals, after all, and all healthy animals have sexual interest in other animals. 
Quote:
c) do looks really matter as much as people pretend they do?
They matter, but not to the narrow extent that popular media portrays. We all have some idea of the "type" we find appealing, and that will have a limiting effect on whom we become sexually attracted to. However, I have also had the experience of becoming attracted to someone who was not my type because I found their personality so appealing. I've never been sexually attracted to someone overweight or ugly, though, so looks still matter to that extent.
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d) do we single out people who we are sexually attracted to and meet them just based off of that reason, that they are sexually appealing to us? and do we allow ourselves to open up and relate with them and get along, despite having nothing in common, in order to gain their trust in a meager attempt to get closer to them, to get closer to that fantasy?
Initially, yes, I single out someone for attention because I find them sexually attractive. But if they reveal that they are unappealing as a person, I will not be attracted to them anymore. I have definitely "glossed over" someone's bad behavior because I was in lust with them, though.
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e) how many people tease themselves through obscure behaviors to exploit certain sexual desires, and what do you think is the real percentage of people living with some kind of sexual fetish?
From what I've read, and what I heard from other students in my upper-division Human Sexuality course, almost everyone has some sort of fetish. They are usually pretty tame, though, such as men liking women to wear thigh-high stockings & garter belts.
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f) and lastly, why is sex such an importance in todays world... in media, in culture, in society?
Evolution is the simple answer. The silly monkeys who like sex the most, make the most babies. As to why it is emphasized in our culture, I think that Freud had it right when he described the predictable effects of sexual repression--we exhibit most flagrantly that which we possess the least. We have so little true ease and comfort with sexuality that we must include it in every ad, every TV show, every song. "If you haven't got it, flaunt it!"
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lysergicide
Aurora Borealis


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Re: Sex [Re: Veritas]
#7485705 - 10/04/07 05:21 PM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Veritas said:
Quote:
a) is there really such thing as "i wouldn't have sex with somebody like you, you're like a brother/sister to me?" aka, does a personal relationship (aside from family, concentrating on close friends) really affect the reasons why you wouldn't want to have sex with them? (sexual attraction, not social relationship)
I'd say that it is more the other way around, IOW, you are more likely to become "just friends" with someone to whom you are not sexually attracted.
would probably explain why i never have girlfriends.
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onlynow
transformativeinformativeenergy



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there was this girl I was "just friends" with, and wasn't attracted to her. then we ate shrooms and everything changed.
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Strive to be more than a codified manifestation of a generalized technological consciousness
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onlynow
transformativeinformativeenergy



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Re: Sex [Re: onlynow]
#7485718 - 10/04/07 05:25 PM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
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spontaneous is love
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Strive to be more than a codified manifestation of a generalized technological consciousness
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Veritas

Registered: 04/15/05
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Could be. My best guess is that single people tend to attempt a relationship with someone to whom they are attracted, and to develop a friendship with those whom they like but do not find attractive.
If you have lots of "girls who are friends" rather than girlfriends, it may be because these women are not attracted to you.
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lysergicide
Aurora Borealis


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Re: Sex [Re: Veritas]
#7485732 - 10/04/07 05:29 PM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
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my day will come eventually, i'm sure.
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Veritas

Registered: 04/15/05
Posts: 11,089
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You might also consider whether you are sending "just friends" messages to the women whom you meet. There is a cultural bias against women being sexually assertive, so most of us tend to watch & wait for some signals before we pursue anything further. You don't have to be a creep, just flirt & give out some looks and compliments to let them know you are interested in them for more than their mind.
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lysergicide
Aurora Borealis


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Re: Sex [Re: Veritas]
#7485787 - 10/04/07 05:46 PM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
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i appreciate your advice. but i feel that i have a lot more to offer over other guys. i don't want to brag (i'm in no position to) but to me, it's obvious: i'm extremely funny, very adventurous, very laid back, optimistic, sweet, very caring and honest. i'm artistic and creative and i have a beautiful imagination and a wild mind, i'm always dreaming up plans or new ideas. i have a talent for empathy. i just try and find my own way to connect with people emotionally on their own level and i always try and make people feel comfortable or to get them to laugh. and to feel accepted amongst people, or to even have them put so much trust or appreciation into me, makes me feel so good about myself. i have all the friends in the world, and absolutely no enemies. i wouldnt have it any other way.
but the majority of guys that one will encounter aren't special. this statement makes me look closed minded, but remember that i'm a young mind, and in my age group, guys are almost competing for attention. most guys that i know have all the same tastes in hobbies, music, art (or lack thereof, for that matter), humor, and outlooks on life. none of them are very smart or artistic or even creative or sweet for that matter. a lot of guys, well, it just seems like they don't have anything all that special to offer... at all.
but theres one thing that they may have over me, and it seems to win over most of the girls anyway: physical attraction.
and thats just another reminder of how physical and sexual attraction plays such a big role in our society. it plays a (or the) key role for the majority of relationships.
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery



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Quote:
lysergicide said:
Quote:
Icelander said: Great topic.
a) see (c
b) yes
c)yes
d)yes
e)yes, 100%
f)death anxiety.
This is from a mans perspective. I suspect a couple of these answers might differ if I were female.
may i see your reasoning for questions a, c, d, e? not that i doubt you in the least, but i want to see your reasons why, or at least clue me in to this funky phenomenon known as sexual attraction.
See Veritas, as she is pretty close to my views. Although I will say looks are (for men) as important as they seem. That's not all there is to it but mostly we reflect our culture.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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lysergicide
Aurora Borealis


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Re: Sex [Re: onlynow]
#7485862 - 10/04/07 06:03 PM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
onlynow said: there was this girl I was "just friends" with, and wasn't attracted to her. then we ate shrooms and everything changed.
and how did this go about occuring?
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Veritas

Registered: 04/15/05
Posts: 11,089
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I would not presume to speak for ALL women, but I will say that there seems to be much more "wiggle room" for men as far as what women find acceptable.
Unless you are downright UGLY, or morbidly obese, some women will be attracted to you. However, if you are not sending sexual signals, you may end up with many female friends & no lovers.
Plus, if you really are that fantastic, women may assume that you're gay.
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onlynow
transformativeinformativeenergy



Registered: 02/06/07
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Quote:
lysergicide said:
Quote:
onlynow said: there was this girl I was "just friends" with, and wasn't attracted to her. then we ate shrooms and everything changed.
and how did this go about occuring?
well we were friends, i wasn't attracted to her in any way. no thoughts ever occurred. then we did some shrooms together and fell in love. like i said, love is spontaneous and is experienced when there is a deep connection. and i guess that trip was the beginning of a deep connection!
but then she moved 10 hours away so that story ended.
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Strive to be more than a codified manifestation of a generalized technological consciousness
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery



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Re: Sex [Re: onlynow]
#7486034 - 10/04/07 06:57 PM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
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It just goes to show ya.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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onlynow
transformativeinformativeenergy



Registered: 02/06/07
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the power of the spontaneous
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Strive to be more than a codified manifestation of a generalized technological consciousness
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Bard
Ultrahuman


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a) I don't know that feeling, but I wish I had... I only have those types of relationships with males, I wish I had deep friendships with girls, without the sexual attraction component... I had one like it I think, from my birth until we hit puberty, and from then on we became and now, are like strangers... So it's very interesting, I don't even know how it came to be, but I don't want her now, not as lover, and not as friend, but a relationship which is like that childhood friendship.
b) Never. 
c) Looks matter, but matter in what aspect? What is beautiful is beautiful, what is ugly is ugly.
d) Everybody has a lot in common with everybody else... So every sexual attraction is a chance for us to find this connection.
e) Lot of I think, maybe everybody...
f) Sex is the sacred union. Sex is God. So as humankind reached a certain point in spiritual and material advancement, we start to have more time, and more desire to pay more attention tho Sex. So we can, and we do.
-------------------- So dreaming let's you know reality exists.
I don't belive. I fear.
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leery11
I Tell You What!

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Re: Sex [Re: Bard]
#7487782 - 10/05/07 09:35 AM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
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The only thing I know about sex is that it is a strangling force in my energy body.
Something to cut away.
The desire pollutes everything. The addictive craving. Desperate and ravenous clinging to an IDEA a mere illusion of pleasure sold to you through the media.
Tantra is the proper route to sexual liberation.
otherwise you are just craving something.
Lets invert that though, maybe you crave it because you are hungry and have a real need? Is this possible?
-------------------- I am the MacDaddy of Heimlich County, I play it Straight Up Yo! ....I embrace my desire to feel the rhythm, to feel connected enough to step aside and weep like a widow, to feel inspired, to fathom the power, to witness the beauty, to bathe in the fountain, to swing on the spiral of our divinity and still be a human...... Om Namah Shivaya, I tell you What!
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Lion
Decadent Flower Magnate



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Re: Sex [Re: leery11]
#7487798 - 10/05/07 09:40 AM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
leery11 said: The only thing I know about sex is that it is a strangling force in my energy body.
Something to cut away.
I've seen it this way before and still do in some ways; but I think that's ultimately an unhealthy view to adopt because you are denying and repressing something that is a part of you.
Quote:
The desire pollutes everything. The addictive craving. Desperate and ravenous clinging to an IDEA a mere illusion of pleasure sold to you through the media.
Well, you can see through this media-generated illusion, so why let that shallow desire be a pollutant? Let it arise, sit and be with the accompanying sensations, and it will pass...
If you try to 'cut away' your sexuality, you may find yourself closed to new experiences which could be beneficial.
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leery11
I Tell You What!

Registered: 06/24/05
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Re: Sex [Re: Lion]
#7487802 - 10/05/07 09:42 AM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
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Right, I let it pass through.
I am not opposed to finding a sexual partner. It has to be something genuine, loving, and with quality. That is my responsibility.
-------------------- I am the MacDaddy of Heimlich County, I play it Straight Up Yo! ....I embrace my desire to feel the rhythm, to feel connected enough to step aside and weep like a widow, to feel inspired, to fathom the power, to witness the beauty, to bathe in the fountain, to swing on the spiral of our divinity and still be a human...... Om Namah Shivaya, I tell you What!
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MushroomTrip
Dr. Teasy Thighs



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Re: Sex [Re: leery11]
#7487839 - 10/05/07 09:56 AM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
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I don't understand why this idea of sex being evil. Sex is something that is to enjoyed and explored. Yes, the media is trying to sell sex, but it does that because there's demand. The media creates it's customers and vice versa. This issue is not one sided. The desperate clinging doesn't come because of sex, it comes from personal issues frustrations, from people who are afraid to actually enjoy not only sex, but life in general. Freedom and happiness comes when drop those fears and start exploring whatever curiosity we might have.
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   All this time I've loved you And never known your face All this time I've missed you And searched this human race Here is true peace Here my heart knows calm Safe in your soul Bathed in your sighs
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Veritas

Registered: 04/15/05
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Quote:
Freedom and happiness comes when drop those fears and start exploring whatever curiosity we might have.
Indeed! 
Claiming that sex is wrong, bad or evil because it is used unskillfully is like making the same claim about food for the same reason. Yes, people overeat & eat things that detract from their health. Yes, people engage in mechanical sex, or manipulative sex, or abusive sex. These actions reflect upon the inner state of the individual, and not upon the nature of food or sex.
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MushroomTrip
Dr. Teasy Thighs



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Re: Sex [Re: Veritas]
#7487882 - 10/05/07 10:10 AM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
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--------------------
   All this time I've loved you And never known your face All this time I've missed you And searched this human race Here is true peace Here my heart knows calm Safe in your soul Bathed in your sighs
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Ego Death
Justadropofwaterinanendlesssea


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I'm sure from your pictures a lot of the shroomerites wouldn't mind exploring you!
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery



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Yes, but would the feeling be mutual?
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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onlynow
transformativeinformativeenergy



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Re: Sex [Re: leery11]
#7488444 - 10/05/07 01:24 PM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
leery11 said: Right, I let it pass through.
I am not opposed to finding a sexual partner. It has to be something genuine, loving, and with quality. That is my responsibility.
Find a woman who is into taoist yoga, or who would be into it. Then she would understand why you wouldn't want to ejaculate.
--------------------
Strive to be more than a codified manifestation of a generalized technological consciousness
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leery11
I Tell You What!

Registered: 06/24/05
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Re: Sex [Re: onlynow]
#7489089 - 10/05/07 04:22 PM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
MushroomTrip said: I don't understand why this idea of sex being evil. Sex is something that is to enjoyed and explored. Yes, the media is trying to sell sex, but it does that because there's demand. The media creates it's customers and vice versa. This issue is not one sided. The desperate clinging doesn't come because of sex, it comes from personal issues frustrations, from people who are afraid to actually enjoy not only sex, but life in general. Freedom and happiness comes when drop those fears and start exploring whatever curiosity we might have.
I could say with some accuracy that I am afraid to enjoy sex.
To boldly go where no man has gone before.
Well, where I have never gone before.
It will come in time. I will probably not come because
Quote:
onlynow said:
Quote:
leery11 said: Right, I let it pass through.
I am not opposed to finding a sexual partner. It has to be something genuine, loving, and with quality. That is my responsibility.
Find a woman who is into taoist yoga, or who would be into it. Then she would understand why you wouldn't want to ejaculate.
yes that sounds pretty good
or one i can quickly teach about such things.
-------------------- I am the MacDaddy of Heimlich County, I play it Straight Up Yo! ....I embrace my desire to feel the rhythm, to feel connected enough to step aside and weep like a widow, to feel inspired, to fathom the power, to witness the beauty, to bathe in the fountain, to swing on the spiral of our divinity and still be a human...... Om Namah Shivaya, I tell you What!
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NiamhNyx
I'm NOT a 'he'



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Quote:
but theres one thing that they may have over me, and it seems to win over most of the girls anyway: physical attraction.
I have to admit that I really only pursue sexual relationships with men I find good looking. But there was this one guy who I dated for awhile who was really not a very good looking guy, and I mean REALLY not someone I would normally be sexually attracted to, but he had such an incredible, easygoing, caring and fun personality and flirted in such a no pressure yet flattering and appealing way that I fell for him. He dumped me for another girl and I was devastated. He was a total ladies man, everyone fell for him. A lot of really beautiful girls have dated him. Take him as your inspiration. Just relax, and flirt in a casual, no pressure sort of way.
Also, if you're still in highschool, don't worry. I didn't have a boyfriend (i liked) until after I got out of that shithole. The best things I did for myself in that department was to get less terrified and intense and get better at communicating.
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery



Registered: 03/15/05
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I only have my stunning good looks. And a cool dog.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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NiamhNyx
I'm NOT a 'he'



Registered: 09/01/02
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Quote:
Icelander said:
I only have my stunning good looks. And a cool dog.
Stunning good looks are all you need, personality is the fall back for wierd looking dudes.
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery



Registered: 03/15/05
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I will PM you then.:D
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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NiamhNyx
I'm NOT a 'he'



Registered: 09/01/02
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Are you insinuating that you want to cheat on your lady friend... and right under her nose? tisk tisk.
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery



Registered: 03/15/05
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She's still sleeping.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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Veritas

Registered: 04/15/05
Posts: 11,089
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Icelander? Hmmm...nope, never heard of him.
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lysergicide
Aurora Borealis


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Re: Sex [Re: Veritas]
#7491179 - 10/06/07 12:16 PM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
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o rly? icelander is one of the best posters around here, a lot like you.
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery



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Re: Sex [Re: Veritas]
#7491184 - 10/06/07 12:18 PM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Veritas said: Icelander? Hmmm...nope, never heard of him.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery



Registered: 03/15/05
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Quote:
lysergicide said: o rly? icelander is one of the best posters around here, a lot like you.
Thanks, I like to be liked. It' doesn't happen that often.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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Veritas

Registered: 04/15/05
Posts: 11,089
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OH, that guy. Yeah, he's OK, I guess.
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lysergicide
Aurora Borealis


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i'm sure a lot of people around here value your opinion. i know i do, you always have something logical to say and you're always helping me see new things in a different light.
thats what i like about the shroomery, so many matured and interested and interesting minds. it's not the same as in real life.
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shakercee
Atheistic Mystic



Registered: 04/08/07
Posts: 606
Loc: Here and there
Last seen: 10 years, 11 months
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That's the thing about www.
BTW Icelander is nearing 15000 posts. Bring on the champagne
-------------------- Pray, v.: To ask that the laws of the universe be annulled in behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy - Ambrose Bierce Medical science has confirmed what the male world has known intuitively for millenia: that scratching your ass is a great aid to complex thinking. Its God's responsibility to forgive the terrorist organizations such as Jaish, Lashkar etc. Its our responsibility to arrange the meeting between them and god." - Indian Armed Forces "Hey Monkey!! Get Funky" - Tarzan and Jane
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery



Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 95,368
Loc: underbelly
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In "real" life you have to sort through lots of sleepers. Here folk are drawn in to the same interests you have.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery



Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 95,368
Loc: underbelly
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Quote:
shakercee said: That's the thing about www.
BTW Icelander is nearing 15000 posts. Bring on the champagne
I only drink raw vegetable juices.:(
At 14,000 I reached enlightenment. At 15,000 I will be the VOID.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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lysergicide
Aurora Borealis


Registered: 12/16/05
Posts: 1,863
Loc: 41.8861° N, 12.4851° E
Last seen: 9 days, 11 hours
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i also feel that in real life, people aren't as open as they are online, because being online gives them the opportunity to make statements and state opinions without having to feel judged or awkward in a face to face confrontation. it's funny how the little things that we've created in society can alter the things you say, how you say them, the timing...
i'm talking about the awkward silence, when you have nothing to say, when you have nothing to do but look at the person or sit there and play with your thumbs... i'll admit it, it's a little confrontational and intimidating sometimes. you just feel weird and you're not really acting how you want to. but the internet allows us to put all of that behind us, and though it seems like a bad thing, i think it's a good thing. it's just important to translate that into reality, so you don't have to feel awkward around people.
i like the shroomery... sure, a lot of people share my same interests. but i think it's because there are so many people with so many things to say, and i'm interested in hearing all of them. and theres a lot more individuality around here than you'd imagine.
shroomery has been pretty damn good to me, i'm proud to be apart of it.
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery



Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 95,368
Loc: underbelly
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I enjoy this place also. It's more interactive than TV which I discarded many years ago. I never got to be on the debate team when I was a kid and so I have gotten my shot here. I'm also made a couple of really good friends, one of whom visits and plays with me each summer. He's much better in real life then on the forums.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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lysergicide
Aurora Borealis


Registered: 12/16/05
Posts: 1,863
Loc: 41.8861° N, 12.4851° E
Last seen: 9 days, 11 hours
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television, like movies, depress me to a certain extent. i feel like i'm admiring and watching others live out their lives while my day slowly passes. i only watch sports on TV, and i actually don't even watch the full games. i watch the history channel as i fall asleep.
but TV and movies for me, well, i'd just rather go out and have some fun with my friends. even if it's interesting, i don't stick around too long. i'll dedicate some time to it, but don't expect me to be watching for a few hours though. ha, not even 2.
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Visionary Tools



Registered: 06/23/07
Posts: 7,953
Last seen: 1 year, 7 months
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Re: Sex [Re: leery11]
#7491821 - 10/06/07 03:40 PM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
leery11 said: The only thing I know about sex is that it is a strangling force in my energy body.
Something to cut away.
The desire pollutes everything. The addictive craving. Desperate and ravenous clinging to an IDEA a mere illusion of pleasure sold to you through the media.
Tantra is the proper route to sexual liberation.
otherwise you are just craving something.
Lets invert that though, maybe you crave it because you are hungry and have a real need? Is this possible?
That craving you and everyone feels is the unarticulated desire to pass on your genes. Nothing to feel bad about, or disgusted, or ashamed. It's frustrating, but it can be managed without having to resort to drastic measures.
--------------------
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery



Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 95,368
Loc: underbelly
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Yes, that post seemed so negative and fear driven. This is what modern culture does to the basic human need for sexual expression.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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Darylbe
Stranger

Registered: 09/26/07
Posts: 7
Last seen: 16 years, 1 month
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Re: Sex [Re: leery11]
#7491873 - 10/06/07 03:57 PM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
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a) definitely. is this question arising from the relationship between you and your best friend that u speak of?
b) i think its perfectly fine to have sexual desire for others, its natural. theres more to a relationship than sex.
c) looks play a major part, but for relationships, theres much more to it.
d) I do tend to single out people that i am sexually attracted to, more so based on a desire for some fling or what not. sexual attraction might not be limited to looks thou, ive seen some females with cool attitudes that do the same to me in regards to attraction. i like meeting different people and hearing what people think, but theres only so far id go to try to discover what they are really about. Like, i have gotten to the point where ive considered a female a selfish bitch that was a total waste of time. pardon the foul language hah.
e) i think a shitload of people have fetishes. i in fact blame pornography for a good deal of mine. the concept of BBW does numbers to me (kidding, kind of). And as for statistics, something like a quarter of all suffocation deaths are due to auto erotic asphyxiation, so do the math yourself.
f) i dont think its more important in the world today. art sought to beautify the naked body throughout the past, kings had hundreds of wives, shakespeare was filled with sexual implications, and ancient greece was filled with sex. i think its just become more acceptable in the mainstream that we are where we are now.
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lysergicide
Aurora Borealis


Registered: 12/16/05
Posts: 1,863
Loc: 41.8861° N, 12.4851° E
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Re: Sex [Re: Darylbe]
#7491910 - 10/06/07 04:12 PM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Darylbe said: a) definitely. is this question arising from the relationship between you and your best friend that u speak of?
actually it's not, but i'm sure it probably came up between us before, i don't know.
but why do you say 'definently'?
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Darylbe
Stranger

Registered: 09/26/07
Posts: 7
Last seen: 16 years, 1 month
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Quote:
lysergicide said: i also feel that in real life, people aren't as open as they are online, because being online gives them the opportunity to make statements and state opinions without having to feel judged or awkward in a face to face confrontation. it's funny how the little things that we've created in society can alter the things you say, how you say them, the timing...
i'm talking about the awkward silence, when you have nothing to say, when you have nothing to do but look at the person or sit there and play with your thumbs... i'll admit it, it's a little confrontational and intimidating sometimes. you just feel weird and you're not really acting how you want to. but the internet allows us to put all of that behind us, and though it seems like a bad thing, i think it's a good thing. it's just important to translate that into reality, so you don't have to feel awkward around people.
i just want to start by addressing this post (previously, i just posted my responses to your questions. after reading through your posts, im responding a bit more).
so in regards to people being open on the internet, many people feel this. i definitely think this technology that is becoming so ordinary in our society is seriously screwing many of us. whether it be people watching tv, being consumed by the computer and "interacting" through im's and shit (you know the WoW southpark episode? its hilarious, but i definitely have a good friend that is basically losing his life to it... as a senior in college. strange.). Basically emails, text messages and ims allow us to express what we feel in words while eliminating feelings from them. I know I am not one to pour my heart out in person to people, so ive been doing my best, and I find writing them sincere letters is helping a bit, but its still not as true as in person.
I also feel this time of situation is affecting the number of people that participate in my classes. for example, in my philosophy course i feel that a solid 10% of the class really participates, and it all pretty much rolls into the same bunch of bullshit with little opposition. this has bothered me to the extent that i am trying to set up a group online where people can feel free to express that which they actually desire to say... i know i would definitely enjoy hearing from those people that really want to say something, just not in front of everyone for possible consequences or chance of rejection.
so i am in boston, and the number of people that have their headphones on, or are on a cellphone, or are texting... its ridiculous. its pretty much like people are just on these tracks and completely oblivious to the word and zombie like. 10 years ago that shit wouldnt happen and i bet it was 20x easier to start random conversation. I will even admit that I am guilty of these acts as well.
ok ok so thats my general response, take what you wish from it haha.
as for your question of why i say definitely, you caught me. i might have been so sure of my answer that it just came out off the tongue, but i feel a bit mixed (dont worry, if you challenge any of my other responses I will be able to support myself haha)
ok so lets say 2 people, opposite sex. consider each other best friends. at that particular time, it is totally understandable that one or the other, or both, would find it completely awkward to have sex. hence why i would find the response to be possible. this can totally change though, just like friends can grow apart and new friendships can form. if we see a situation where they get drunk and have sex, i think it will either escalate to something more, or an opposite affect of a period of awkwardness can arise (my ex and her boy were very best friends and a drunken hook up lead to a relationship. i on the other hand experienced the month long awkward period [luckily it was the summer so the situation had time to calm haha]. I think drunken hook ups can force the change to occur much faster than planned. without the influences, i think that the change is much more gradual.
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TheLightIsOn
In the worst ofall your fears


Registered: 08/10/05
Posts: 358
Last seen: 12 years, 2 months
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Quote:
lysergicide said: do you ever have sex just to please others?
ALWAYS! I am never in it for self pleasure. I live a very spiritual and tantric life. I'm not referring to god when I speak of spiritual.
-PEACE
-------------------- AFOAF's current multi-grow log "In the privince of the mind, what is believed to be true is true or becomes true, within limits to be found experientially and experimentally. These limits are further beliefs to be transcended. In the province of the mind, there are no limits." -John C. Lilly
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery



Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 95,368
Loc: underbelly
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Some meter of mine just went off.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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lysergicide
Aurora Borealis


Registered: 12/16/05
Posts: 1,863
Loc: 41.8861° N, 12.4851° E
Last seen: 9 days, 11 hours
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Re: Sex [Re: Darylbe]
#7492332 - 10/06/07 07:04 PM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Darylbe said:
Quote:
lysergicide said: ok so lets say 2 people, opposite sex. consider each other best friends. at that particular time, it is totally understandable that one or the other, or both, would find it completely awkward to have sex. hence why i would find the response to be possible. this can totally change though, just like friends can grow apart and new friendships can form. if we see a situation where they get drunk and have sex, i think it will either escalate to something more, or an opposite affect of a period of awkwardness can arise (my ex and her boy were very best friends and a drunken hook up lead to a relationship. i on the other hand experienced the month long awkward period [luckily it was the summer so the situation had time to calm haha]. I think drunken hook ups can force the change to occur much faster than planned. without the influences, i think that the change is much more gradual.
i'm not talking about the social awkwardness though, i'm trying to excuse that. i'm talking about just the idea of sexual attraction, and its effects on our close friends and how we see each other as possible fucks.
aside from the social awkwardness, what is there that is ultimately stopping them from even saying "you're sexually attractive" ?
is it over time we learn to see people in a different light that we don't find sexual? very unlikely. we're only trying to get off. best friendship doesn't make anybody less physical appealing.
i'm getting lost in my thoughts, i'm trying to figure this out myself...
i think that quote, "i wouldn't have sex with you, you're like a brother to me" is an excuse you use on somebody you don't find sexually attractive.
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NiamhNyx
I'm NOT a 'he'



Registered: 09/01/02
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Last seen: 14 years, 8 months
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I don't know man, there are friends of mine that I think are physically attractive, but they are too much like brothers to go there. I have good looking male friends that I don't want to have sex with. I'm sure that phrase gets used as polite excuse often enough, but that's not the only reason someone would say it.
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lysergicide
Aurora Borealis


Registered: 12/16/05
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Quote:
TheLightIsOn said:
Quote:
lysergicide said: do you ever have sex just to please others?
I'm not referring to god when I speak of spiritual.
-PEACE
if you lead a tantric life, why are you considering god in a christian perspective? and not only that, why are you pushing that ideology away ? you're only pushing others away like that. listen...
god is free from sin. god is the ultimate reasoning. god is stripped of desire and god is all-seeing, all-loving. god is everywhere. what makes this any different from nirvana or moksha? if you want to still consider it in a christian perspective, you could start differentiating a lot. but most religions have the same goal: to liberate yourself, and to become one with god. and in that same sense, isn't that a tantric practice? to liberate yourself and become one with yourself in search of understanding, of enlightenment, of oneness..
god is a beautiful, pure thing. even if it is not a deity.
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OrgoneConclusion
Blue Fish Group



Registered: 04/01/07
Posts: 45,414
Loc: Under the C
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Quote:
NiamhNyx said: I don't know man, there are friends of mine that I think are physically attractive, but they are too much like brothers to go there. I have good looking male friends that I don't want to have sex with. I'm sure that phrase gets used as polite excuse often enough, but that's not the only reason someone would say it.
That reminds me of the classic guy romance movie: "When Hairy Met Clean-Shaven"...
--------------------
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moon_glue
Orwell's Post9/11 Era



Registered: 01/20/07
Posts: 2,264
Loc: Earth, today...
Last seen: 8 years, 10 months
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Re: Sex [Re: Veritas]
#7492581 - 10/06/07 08:33 PM (16 years, 3 months ago) |
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fetishes are hard to live with, it's whole different kind of lonely.
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MushroomTrip
Dr. Teasy Thighs



Registered: 12/02/05
Posts: 14,794
Loc: red panda village
Last seen: 2 years, 10 months
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Quote:
moon_glue said: fetishes are hard to live with, it's whole different kind of lonely.
And what exactly, in your opinion, is a "fetish"? What makes it so hard to live with them?
--------------------
   All this time I've loved you And never known your face All this time I've missed you And searched this human race Here is true peace Here my heart knows calm Safe in your soul Bathed in your sighs
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TheLightIsOn
In the worst ofall your fears


Registered: 08/10/05
Posts: 358
Last seen: 12 years, 2 months
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Quote:
lysergicide said:
Quote:
TheLightIsOn said:
Quote:
lysergicide said: do you ever have sex just to please others?
I'm not referring to god when I speak of spiritual.
-PEACE
if you lead a tantric life, why are you considering god in a christian perspective? and not only that, why are you pushing that ideology away ? you're only pushing others away like that. listen...
god is free from sin. god is the ultimate reasoning. god is stripped of desire and god is all-seeing, all-loving. god is everywhere. what makes this any different from nirvana or moksha? if you want to still consider it in a christian perspective, you could start differentiating a lot. but most religions have the same goal: to liberate yourself, and to become one with god. and in that same sense, isn't that a tantric practice? to liberate yourself and become one with yourself in search of understanding, of enlightenment, of oneness..
god is a beautiful, pure thing. even if it is not a deity.
Thank you for putting God in another perspective that I never thought of. I can definitely think of God in that way but not as thy divine one. God was always spoken to me in the matter of a deity.
-------------------- AFOAF's current multi-grow log "In the privince of the mind, what is believed to be true is true or becomes true, within limits to be found experientially and experimentally. These limits are further beliefs to be transcended. In the province of the mind, there are no limits." -John C. Lilly
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Rahz
Alive Again


Registered: 11/10/05
Posts: 9,230
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a) is there really such thing as "i wouldn't have sex with somebody like you, you're like a brother/sister to me?" aka, does a personal relationship (aside from family, concentrating on close friends) really affect the reasons why you wouldn't want to have sex with them? (sexual attraction, not social relationship)
I think people use that phrase out of fear of intimacy, or they are trying to let the other person down easy by lying.
b) even in relationships, do we not, at one time or another, have a sexual desire for somebody other than our own partner?
I think everyone does, and it's a lot more often than at one time or another. This is one reason why one man having a relationship with several bisexual girls is a good idea. 
c) do looks really matter as much as people pretend they do?
I think many people place too much emphasis on looks, but men are biologically attracted to nice hip to waist ratios. Liking big tits might have some biological usefulness, but it seems superficial to me. Beyond that, being clean and healthy is the most important quality a woman can have. I think womens attraction to men is based on how the man can make her feel. Health is important as well, but I wouldn't say physical features are the predominant trait that women look for, even if some say it is. Fat ugly guys can get nice girls.
d) do we single out people who we are sexually attracted to and meet them just based off of that reason, that they are sexually appealing to us? and do we allow ourselves to open up and relate with them and get along, despite having nothing in common, in order to gain their trust in a meager attempt to get closer to them, to get closer to that fantasy?
On a biological level, men want to spread their seed to many women, and women want to receive semen from several sources. The "meager attempt" is a tragic set of events based off the minds interpretation of what society expects, and only happens because the person doesn't believe they're capable of doing any better.
e) how many people tease themselves through obscure behaviors to exploit certain sexual desires, and what do you think is the real percentage of people living with some kind of sexual fetish?
I'd say a large majority of people have sexual fetishes, though not everyone takes fetish to extremes.
f) and lastly, why is sex such an importance in todays world... in media, in culture, in society?
From a chakra frame, people exploit sexual energy in an attempt to elevate their awareness. Most people are living mainly through their first three chakras and their attention is thus centered upon sex and survival. This is why sex is overly dominant in many sectors of society. When people have trouble raising their awareness, they go back to what they know, and that generally centers around raw sexuality and survival mentalities. There's more to life, but people take what they can get and what they believe they deserve.
-------------------- rahz comfort pleasure power love truth awareness peace "You’re not looking close enough if you can only see yourself in people who look like you." —Ayishat Akanbi
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WhiskeyClone
Not here


Registered: 06/25/01
Posts: 16,509
Loc: Longitudinal Center of Canada ...
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Great post 
a) is there really such thing as "i wouldn't have sex with somebody like you, you're like a brother/sister to me?" aka, does a personal relationship (aside from family, concentrating on close friends) really affect the reasons why you wouldn't want to have sex with them? (sexual attraction, not social relationship)
I'd say no. Social situations might prevent anything from happening (i.e. between me and my friend's wife) but I think the sexual attraction is either there or it is not there.
b) even in relationships, do we not, at one time or another, have a sexual desire for somebody other than our own partner?
Of course!
c) do looks really matter as much as people pretend they do?
Not when it comes to sexual attraction. A person's energy and behavior make up much more of the attraction than looks.
Of course, looks can be a dealbreaker, or they can help you overlook some of the person's less desirable qualities, like Veritas said.
d) do we single out people who we are sexually attracted to and meet them just based off of that reason, that they are sexually appealing to us? and do we allow ourselves to open up and relate with them and get along, despite having nothing in common, in order to gain their trust in a meager attempt to get closer to them, to get closer to that fantasy?
I don't. I stall in relationships with women when I find we have nothing to talk about, no matter how attracted I am sexually. Sexual attraction does not help me relate to anyone.
e) how many people tease themselves through obscure behaviors to exploit certain sexual desires, and what do you think is the real percentage of people living with some kind of sexual fetish?
100%
f) and lastly, why is sex such an importance in todays world... in media, in culture, in society?
Because it's one of our most basic desires. We want it (along with food, oxygen, and security) more than anything.
-------------------- Welcome evermore to gods and men is the self-helping man. For him all doors are flung wide: him all tongues greet, all honors crown, all eyes follow with desire. Our love goes out to him and embraces him, because he did not need it. ~ R.W. Emerson, "Self-Reliance"
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lysergicide
Aurora Borealis


Registered: 12/16/05
Posts: 1,863
Loc: 41.8861° N, 12.4851° E
Last seen: 9 days, 11 hours
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i'm so happy this thread has developed into what it has. so many young brilliant minds speaking at once.
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery



Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 95,368
Loc: underbelly
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"Scientists suggest that these sudden, intense attachments are nature's way of drugging us, otherwise we would never be so stupid as to reproduce and spend our most productive energetic years chasing, feeding and socializing ungrateful half citizens. The more powerful a feeling has evolved to be, the more difficult the goal it must be trying to achieve. "
From a very interesting three part series on the science of male sexuality. Sex on the Brain by Chip Rowe
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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lysergicide
Aurora Borealis


Registered: 12/16/05
Posts: 1,863
Loc: 41.8861° N, 12.4851° E
Last seen: 9 days, 11 hours
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thats a very insightful idea Icelander, thank you
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lysergicide
Aurora Borealis


Registered: 12/16/05
Posts: 1,863
Loc: 41.8861° N, 12.4851° E
Last seen: 9 days, 11 hours
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btw your avatar ftw
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