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InvisibleKilroyMilosevik
Swiss Ego
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Registered: 02/14/07
Posts: 989
Loc: Northwest of Nowhere
Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!)
    #7454641 - 09/26/07 07:04 AM (16 years, 4 months ago)

So I'm driving home from class one morning last week. I just finished my pipe and put it back in its spot and I go to change the song on the stereo. As I'm doing this ... WACK ... fucking deafening sound coming from my open window.

I look over and see nothing, then all of a sudden... FUCKING FEATHERS... EVERYWHERE! I can't even breath! I roll all my windows down immediately and begin to search and hope that the bird isn't in my car. At first, I see nothing, but then... I see this! (Insert creepy violin tune here)



A tail and a pair of feet in my fuckin passenger seat... great. Now where's the rest of it? I drove the rest of the way home with all the windows down, feathers flying everywhere, and the hope and concern that there isn't a bird head in my coat in the back seat. I'm glad no one was behind me the whole way home; it would have definitely looked interesting...

So I get home and immediately investigate, I examine my coat in the back seat... nothing. As I'm looking through the coat... I spot it.



Okay so now I found both parts of the animal... but what kind of mess did it leave behind?

The point of Impact - If the window wasn't open, this never would have happened.


The Roof Splatter - Look Closely


The final impact splatter


Trajectory


and the Final Product.



I've hit plenty of birds in my day, but wow... It took me over an hour to clean up all this. There was a lot more mess to this than I posted, but I wanted to start cleaning up and not let the blood dry. anyone else have a similar story to share?


--------------------
-The door.
-The door is closed.
-Why is the door closed?
        *Gasps*
-Why DOES the door close!?


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Invisibleindica
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Registered: 08/17/05
Posts: 18,905
Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: KilroyMilosevik]
    #7454653 - 09/26/07 07:10 AM (16 years, 4 months ago)

poor little fella


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InvisibletrendalM
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Registered: 04/17/01
Posts: 20,815
Loc: Ontario, Canada Flag
Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: KilroyMilosevik]
    #7454656 - 09/26/07 07:10 AM (16 years, 4 months ago)

Damn! That's a one in a million shot!

One time a friend and I were driving down the freeway (about 120km/h). He had his window wide open. All of a sudden my friend gives his head a shake, as if something hit him. He reaches up to feel around the side of his head....and takes his hand back covered in bird shit :lol:

And then there were many jokes about the birds learning trajectory and projectile motion :smirk:


--------------------
Once, men turned their thinking over to machines in the hope that this would set them free.
But that only permitted other men with machines to enslave them.


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InvisibleThin White Duke
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Registered: 10/20/04
Posts: 51,530
Loc: Flag
Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: KilroyMilosevik]
    #7454662 - 09/26/07 07:14 AM (16 years, 4 months ago)

That is fucking awesome.


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InvisibleAcidic_SlothM
Acidic poly-Sided Di-slothamide
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Registered: 05/29/02
Posts: 43,732
Loc: ainrofilac Flag
Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: KilroyMilosevik]
    #7454671 - 09/26/07 07:17 AM (16 years, 4 months ago)

wow, that's amazing.

that's actually more like cutting a bird in half and less like decapitation. decapitation would have been cool, this was much, much better.


--------------------
-- Accept my heart warming gift of TREE SCRATCHIES!!! I absolve thee!! --

JaP: 30,000 lines of gay, cock, and fag can't be wrong
Ped: only in #shroomery is "smuggle opium in her ass" followed by "i don't want shitty opium" which is followed by " *** Joins: PENISSQUAD"
--
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:heart: :todcasil: :heart:


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InvisibleKilroyMilosevik
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Loc: Northwest of Nowhere
Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: trendal]
    #7454673 - 09/26/07 07:18 AM (16 years, 4 months ago)

Yea I had to clean bird shit out of my car as well... most of it was on the outside of the back drivers side window, but some was on the inside too. The bird must have been working on a nest because I found a few small twigs, some dental floss, a piece of fishing line and part of a bottle cap, none of which was mine. I bet the little guy didn't feel a damn thing. I still see feathers once in a while when my window is open.

I'm not sure whats worse though, a big pile of bird shit on the side of your head, or two pieces of a dead bird in your car, with blood on the side of your head.

I swear that if I hadn't had been fucking with the stereo at that very moment, I would have taken part of that bird directly to the face.


--------------------
-The door.
-The door is closed.
-Why is the door closed?
        *Gasps*
-Why DOES the door close!?


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Invisibleindica
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Registered: 08/17/05
Posts: 18,905
Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: KilroyMilosevik]
    #7454683 - 09/26/07 07:20 AM (16 years, 4 months ago)

I swear to god birds deliberately shit on cars/pedestrians.

it's like their aim game

im not kidding


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InvisibleKilroyMilosevik
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Registered: 02/14/07
Posts: 989
Loc: Northwest of Nowhere
Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: indica]
    #7454687 - 09/26/07 07:22 AM (16 years, 4 months ago)

I'd like to think that as well, but then I learned in school that most birds shit about every five minutes... so either they honestly don't give a fuck or they evolved to shit every five minutes not to escape from predators but to piss humans off.


--------------------
-The door.
-The door is closed.
-Why is the door closed?
        *Gasps*
-Why DOES the door close!?


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Invisiblememes
Blessed


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Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: indica]
    #7454702 - 09/26/07 07:25 AM (16 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

xk3m_indica said:
I swear to god birds deliberately shit on cars/pedestrians.

it's like their aim game

im not kidding



the other game they play is "sit on either side of the street, and as a car is coming, swoop across the road as low and as close to the car as possible".

i swear to god it'll be an empty country road with trees lining either side, and then as i drive down it birds just swoop in front and then land on the other side.


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Invisibleindica
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Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: memes]
    #7454706 - 09/26/07 07:26 AM (16 years, 4 months ago)

:lol: yeah that one too, I forgot about that one


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OfflineChubba
Vape hungry

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Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) *DELETED* [Re: memes]
    #7454713 - 09/26/07 07:29 AM (16 years, 4 months ago)

Post deleted by Chubba

Reason for deletion: Deleted



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Invisibleindica
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Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: Chubba]
    #7454718 - 09/26/07 07:30 AM (16 years, 4 months ago)

ive nearly crashed my car so many times avoiding animals on the road. i spend a lot of time driving out in the bush (my friends live out in the bush) at night, and ive nearly hit so many trees from swerving off the road


first time i hit a rabbit i was fucking devastated. pulled over and buried the little guy.


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InvisibleMrKite1
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Registered: 03/02/04
Posts: 1,384
Loc: AK
Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: KilroyMilosevik]
    #7454743 - 09/26/07 07:37 AM (16 years, 4 months ago)

It could have been worse, you could of hit a turkey vulture.


--------------------
When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.


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Invisibleindica
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Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: MrKite1]
    #7454756 - 09/26/07 07:40 AM (16 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

MrKite1 said:
It could have been worse, you could of hit a turkey vulture.




:rofl:


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InvisibleWhiskeyClone
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Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: KilroyMilosevik]
    #7454782 - 09/26/07 07:51 AM (16 years, 4 months ago)

Hahah great photo spread :congrats:


--------------------
Welcome evermore to gods and men is the self-helping man.  For him all doors are flung wide: him all tongues greet, all honors crown, all eyes follow with desire.  Our love goes out to him and embraces him, because he did not need it.

~ R.W. Emerson, "Self-Reliance"

:heartpump:


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InvisibleKilroyMilosevik
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Registered: 02/14/07
Posts: 989
Loc: Northwest of Nowhere
Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: MrKite1]
    #7455448 - 09/26/07 11:46 AM (16 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

MrKite1 said:
It could have been worse, you could of hit a turkey vulture.




:rofl2:

I see plenty of those on the way to class... probably eating the things I have run down in the previous days and weeks.  I don't avoid running over animals anymore, unless its a deer... or a turkey vulture.  I've had too many near accidents to see it sensible to avoid a small animal anymore. 

If it had been a turkey vulture, I would probably be posting this from a hospital bed.

:lol:

By the way - WhiskeyClone, :ilold: at your av... it sort of suited the subject.


--------------------
-The door.
-The door is closed.
-Why is the door closed?
        *Gasps*
-Why DOES the door close!?


Edited by KilroyMilosevik (09/26/07 11:48 AM)


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OfflineLocus
Male

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Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: KilroyMilosevik]
    #7455473 - 09/26/07 11:51 AM (16 years, 4 months ago)

aww dude :/


--------------------

The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing. One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvelous structure of reality. It is enough if one tries merely to comprehend a little of this mystery every day. Never lose a holy curiosity. ~ Albert Einstein
"Fear is the great barrier to human growth." ~ Dr. Robert Monroe



~~~*Dosis sola facit venenum*~~~

*Check my profile to listen to my music* :smile:


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OfflinePsy Baba
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Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: KilroyMilosevik]
    #7455477 - 09/26/07 11:52 AM (16 years, 4 months ago)

Wow man, that is ridiculous. I am glad it did not cause a wreck.


--------------------
---------------------------------------------------
Sit up and meditate, there's no time to contemplate.
-------------------------------------------------
I have an international Hitech Psytrance project with a friend: BioChronic
I make various form of Psytrance as a solo Project Dendriform


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InvisibleKilroyMilosevik
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Registered: 02/14/07
Posts: 989
Loc: Northwest of Nowhere
Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: Psy Baba]
    #7455503 - 09/26/07 12:00 PM (16 years, 4 months ago)

I didn't even know what the fuck happened at first. I was fucking with my stereo, changing the song or something, and WHACK.... then for about 4 or 5 seconds I was left to wonder what the fuck happened - then came the feathers. If I wasn't fucking with the stereo, I definitely would have gotten a face full of bird (who cares which piece) and I probably would have lost control.


--------------------
-The door.
-The door is closed.
-Why is the door closed?
        *Gasps*
-Why DOES the door close!?


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InvisibleDiploidM
Cuban


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Posts: 19,274
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Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: KilroyMilosevik]
    #7455520 - 09/26/07 12:05 PM (16 years, 4 months ago)

I was driving down the highway once with a friend in the passenger seat when a giant palmetto bug cockroach flew in the window and landed on the seat between her legs.

She totally, TOTALLY freaked and started screaming for me to stop the car. I've never seen anyone exit a car faster than she did that day. :rofl:


--------------------
Republican Values:

1) You can't get married to your spouse who is the same sex as you.
2) You can't have an abortion no matter how much you don't want a child.
3) You can't have a certain plant in your possession or you'll get locked up with a rapist and a murderer.

4) We need a smaller, less-intrusive government.


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InvisiblecApTaInCrAp
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Registered: 03/19/04
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Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: indica]
    #7455529 - 09/26/07 12:08 PM (16 years, 4 months ago)

Nice picture story :thumbup: , lucky that thing didnt whack you in the head.


Quote:

xk3m_indica said:
I swear to god birds deliberately shit on cars/pedestrians.

it's like their aim game

im not kidding




I'd shit on most of us too.


--------------------
"...Terrific, im glad we've had this time to discuss..im outro, call me if you wanna blaze one up.."



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InvisibleKilroyMilosevik
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Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: cApTaInCrAp]
    #7455563 - 09/26/07 12:16 PM (16 years, 4 months ago)

:lol:

Good point!  I probably would too.


--------------------
-The door.
-The door is closed.
-Why is the door closed?
        *Gasps*
-Why DOES the door close!?


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Offlineleftandright
space stunt man
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Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: KilroyMilosevik]
    #7455564 - 09/26/07 12:16 PM (16 years, 4 months ago)

that shit is too funny


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OfflineIolaa
iolaa, not lolaa
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Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: leftandright]
    #7455583 - 09/26/07 12:24 PM (16 years, 4 months ago)

you really nailed em. i like the way the heart is just chillin' there.


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OfflineMaverick
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Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: Iolaa]
    #7455631 - 09/26/07 12:37 PM (16 years, 4 months ago)

I hit a goose and a wild boar once. The wild boar did the same thing that bird did on the front left of my car. The goose just broke a windshield.

After I hit the boar, the entire left front side of my car was covered in guts and blood, had to spray it off for an hour to get the smell to go away. Also, I still haven't been able to fork out the 3grand to repair the damage...


Edited by DRTMaverick (09/26/07 12:38 PM)


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OfflineLocus
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Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: Maverick]
    #7455650 - 09/26/07 12:47 PM (16 years, 4 months ago)

one time there was a huge spider in the car in florida. i suspect something poisonous. i was in the back seat and it was right next to me and i was like AHHHHH! and jumped into the front part of the car as far as i could go.


--------------------

The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing. One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvelous structure of reality. It is enough if one tries merely to comprehend a little of this mystery every day. Never lose a holy curiosity. ~ Albert Einstein
"Fear is the great barrier to human growth." ~ Dr. Robert Monroe



~~~*Dosis sola facit venenum*~~~

*Check my profile to listen to my music* :smile:


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InvisiblePat Bateman, VP
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Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: KilroyMilosevik]
    #7584653 - 11/01/07 04:28 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

Haha, awesome.

Would've sucked if a cop came by to see what was wrong and noticed a peculiar smoky smell :smirked:


--------------------
Is a man not entitled to the sweat of his brow?
No, says the man in Washington; it belongs to the poor.
No, says the man in the Vatican; it belongs to God.
No, says the man in Moscow; it belongs to everyone.

I rejected those answers. Instead, I chose something
different. I chose the impossible. I chose...
Rapture.
-  Andrew Ryan

Formula: 0


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OfflineJadian
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Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: Pat Bateman, VP]
    #7584694 - 11/01/07 04:40 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Le Narrateur said:
Haha, awesome.

Would've sucked if a cop came by to see what was wrong and noticed a peculiar smoky smell :smirked:




"Geee I don't know officer, when the bird exploded all this marijuana smoke just came out of him :shrug:"


--------------------
LNC's official Alaskan stoner
:jackdaniels::drooling::jackdaniels:


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InvisibleLosAngelesGraff
Ca Shroomite
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Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: KilroyMilosevik]
    #7584730 - 11/01/07 04:49 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

damn i feel bad for you and the bird


--------------------
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http://cover-upz.blogspot.com/
Please PM me if you can help build cover upz blog.


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OfflineTurntableJunky
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Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: KilroyMilosevik]
    #7584743 - 11/01/07 04:53 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

This thread is so fucking hilarious. It shouldn't be but it is.


--------------------


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OfflineGill


Registered: 10/18/07
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Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: TurntableJunky]
    #7585027 - 11/01/07 05:59 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

I haven't had any experiences with hitting animals. The closest are the times driving on long Florida roads near the marshes, having HUGE bugs smash into the windshield and scare the shit out of everyone. There is one bird-related story, however...

I was sitting outside reading a book on the front porch. Out of nowhere, I hear something that sounded like a baseball slamming into the window (the window didn't break, though). I look down, and there's a dead bird. The guy flew right into a closed window and broke its neck. I felt pretty bad for it. Bad enough to throw it off the porch and laugh about it on the internet to my friends on AIM minutes later.


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Offlineoh_ollie
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Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: Diploid]
    #7585130 - 11/01/07 06:37 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

you were smoking a pipe at 90+ mph!?!?!??!


--------------------
"I don't have big anxieties. I wish I did. I'd be much more interesting." - Roy Lichtenstein

"I like the idea of taking a right into nature instead of a left to a grocery store." - akb112211


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InvisibleDiploidM
Cuban


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Posts: 19,274
Loc: Rabbit Hole
Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: oh_ollie]
    #7585216 - 11/01/07 07:03 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

Ahaha! Not that kind of roach! :rofl2:


--------------------
Republican Values:

1) You can't get married to your spouse who is the same sex as you.
2) You can't have an abortion no matter how much you don't want a child.
3) You can't have a certain plant in your possession or you'll get locked up with a rapist and a murderer.

4) We need a smaller, less-intrusive government.


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OfflineMitchnast
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Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: Diploid]
    #7585395 - 11/01/07 07:57 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

that cedar waxwing looks more deASSitated than decapitated.


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OfflineLiquid_Dimension
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Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: Mitchnast]
    #7585398 - 11/01/07 07:58 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

HAHAHA,wow...poor bird.


--------------------


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InvisibleKilroyMilosevik
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Registered: 02/14/07
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Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: oh_ollie]
    #7586906 - 11/02/07 08:46 AM (16 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

oh_ollie said:
you were smoking a pipe at 90+ mph!?!?!??!




:yesnod:

I've only seen 1 cop on my way to school in the year and a half I've been there - He was sleeping along side the road next to an intersection.  So fuck yea I'll have a bowl while I'm racing down the backroads!  I'm about to go to class right now and you can bet your ass I have the same intentions this morning as I do every morning.

Quote:

Jadian said:
Quote:

Le Narrateur said:
Haha, awesome.

Would've sucked if a cop came by to see what was wrong and noticed a peculiar smoky smell :smirked:




"Geee I don't know officer, when the bird exploded all this marijuana smoke just came out of him :shrug:"




:rofl2:

That would have been my excuse... fuckin' doped up birds, no wonder he ended up looking like this! 

Honestly, I probably would have gotten pulled over if a cop had seen all the fucking feathers flying out of my car - backroads ftw!


--------------------
-The door.
-The door is closed.
-Why is the door closed?
        *Gasps*
-Why DOES the door close!?


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Offlinecoda
Banjo Goiter
Male


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Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: KilroyMilosevik]
    #7587515 - 11/02/07 11:54 AM (16 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Damn! That's a one in a million shot!




actually i think randy johnson nailing a piegon with a 90+ mph fastball during a game would be the one in a million shot.  :wink:



--------------------
To get really high is to forget yourself. And to forget yourself is to see everything else. And to see everything else is to become an understanding molecule in evolution, a conscious tool of the universe. And I think every human being should be a conscious tool of the universe. . . .

-JG

i really am glad you came back to us instead of taking the other path. *hug*

-A_S (RIP your final words to me will never be forgotten)



Don't fuck with the laughing jesus.


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OfflineMaverick
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Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: coda]
    #7587541 - 11/02/07 11:59 AM (16 years, 2 months ago)

Why were you driving 90+ mph btw?


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OfflineJadian
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Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: coda]
    #7587595 - 11/02/07 12:14 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

Yeah that pitch was sweet.


And why not drive 90+ mph if you can?


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InvisibleKilroyMilosevik
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Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: Jadian]
    #7587651 - 11/02/07 12:29 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Jadian said:
And why not drive 90+ mph if you can?




:yesnod:

cuz its fun to drive fast... I thought everyone knew that? :shrug:


That pitch is a classic btw... I'll never forget the first time I saw that.


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OfflineNickio
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Re: Decapitating a bird at 90+ mph. (Pics!) [Re: Diploid]
    #7587739 - 11/02/07 12:55 PM (16 years, 2 months ago)

dude, mad lolz


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