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InvisibleFreakQlibrium
Son of Uncle Meat
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Registered: 06/06/02
Posts: 19,058
Loc: Toronto Canada
A Scary experience.......
    #740736 - 07/12/02 05:58 AM (15 years, 2 months ago)

I haven't had this happen for a while now but it happened again last night and I was just looking for some possible feedback/possible insight, here goes: Sometimes when I am sleeping I will awake inside my sleep without becoming sensually aware of my surrounding physical ambient. I am assuming this is somehwhat akin to "lucid dearming". The thing here is that I sense some sort of evil/ominous presence......and if I choose to stay in that state it's like a trap door opens and I am even MORE aware of his malevolent force.......my sense of self expands greatly during these experiences but in a negative way. I try and stick with this through maybe one or two deeper(?) levels of trap doors but in the end I find myself struggling to reagain regualr subject/object conciousness within my physical domain. When I finally do manage to break away from this almost magnetic field this force has on me, I find that even after I open my eyes that my body is paralyzed for several seconds. On occasion I can feel a heavy weight on my chest and hands around my throat with my eyes fully open while I am in that paralytic state.Sometime I would like to enter into the "demon realm" more conciously and fight off the urge to wake up but rather just to "go with it" and see where it leads.......do you think that this might pose an actual danger to my well being? I can not emphasize enough how REAL this sense of all pervasive evil is. ....


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"Being crazier than a shithouse rat is not sufficient grounds for banishment"



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Anonymous

Re: A Scary experience....... [Re: FreakQlibrium]
    #740767 - 07/12/02 06:33 AM (15 years, 2 months ago)

I think you should dive into it with no fear, and see how deep the rabbit hole goes.
Where is this "evil" force coming from? Is it you? Because what you described sound similar to things I have dreamt about, where that evil force is actually the "dark side" of myself. If this is the case I have found it is best to face your fear head on. In fact that is always a good thing in the dream state. For me at least.

Do you always try to break away from this force after a certain point and that is what leads to your paralyzed state when you wake up? If so, I would suggest next time...going as deep as possible... do not try to break away... see how deep you can go.... find the SOURCE of this malevolent force, find out who/what it is, and face it with NO fear. Love doens't hurt either


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Anonymous

Re: A Scary experience....... [Re: FreakQlibrium]
    #740772 - 07/12/02 06:36 AM (15 years, 2 months ago)

The way you stated it leads me to believe this has happened to you on numerous occassions. If the end result is usually the same... trying and approach it from a different angle or perspective couldn't hurt. An intention to heal and learn from it rather than be scared by it.


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InvisibleSwami
Eggshell Walker

Registered: 01/19/00
Posts: 15,413
Loc: In the hen house
Re: A Scary experience....... [Re: FreakQlibrium]
    #740778 - 07/12/02 06:40 AM (15 years, 2 months ago)

Please do research on Sleep Paralysis. This is a physiological not a metaphysical condition.


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The proof is in the pudding.


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InvisibleFreakQlibrium
Son of Uncle Meat
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Re: A Scary experience....... [Re: ]
    #740795 - 07/12/02 06:51 AM (15 years, 2 months ago)

Ideally man, I really would like to go with it and see what it leads to....it's just that whenever it happens it's always so damned unexpected and unfortunatley up to this point anyway my own fear has been the major directive force shaping my reactions. When you ask if this "dark force" is a part of mysef, tht opens up an entire can of worms as well. Twice in my life, in 2 different places with 2 different people(once in the light of day), some sort of "evil double"(i KNOW this sounds wacky, even to YOU ), came out and physically attacked these people.......I mean it physically attacked them and they had to fight it off. Both times I was asleep in the next room. They both reported exactly the same thing......that it looked just like me but it was the embodiment of evil......that it floated up off the ground and began it's aassault.... the last time it happened(in 83) was also my last pure experience with the inner love/light of nirvanic conciousness as I have come to know it.......so I can definitely see how this evil force would have been forced to flee when confronted with the light......but it freaks me to think that I may have something inside of me so sinister and malformed that it can actually take on my physical appearance and attack people while I sleep, blissfully unaware. I think this also adds to my fear/apprehension about following thisTHING (wtf it IS)..especially when I can feel this oppressive weight on my chest........Maybe it is just my darker side, I'm not really sure but to me this is almost like Carlos Casteneda having to battle his "ally" at some point.....I just wish that I were somewhat more concious so that I could force myself not to yeild to the/my natural tendency to fight this "thing" off and wake up......this is really about the only thing in this life that scares me, and I feel that if I could somehow work up the resolve to confront(and maybe Defeat it) that it could very well result in some deep change of conciousness within me, I'm assuming here that it would be for the better


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"Being crazier than a shithouse rat is not sufficient grounds for banishment"



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InvisibleFreakQlibrium
Son of Uncle Meat
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Registered: 06/06/02
Posts: 19,058
Loc: Toronto Canada
Re: A Scary experience....... [Re: Swami]
    #740802 - 07/12/02 07:01 AM (15 years, 2 months ago)

Hey Swami......the sleep paralysis itself is merely the tip of the iceburg in this case(opening the door there for you to use "lettuce" in your next response, if there is one). It's really the intermeadiary experience as well as where it might lead if I choose to follow that path in the future that is my main concern. I only mentioned the paralysis itself as I wanted to give as accurate and detailed description as possible.


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"Being crazier than a shithouse rat is not sufficient grounds for banishment"



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OfflineAdamist
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Re: A Scary experience....... [Re: FreakQlibrium]
    #740838 - 07/12/02 07:24 AM (15 years, 2 months ago)

Freak I can relate to what you describe, especially the parts about a dark force and waking with pressures on your chest and throat.
Shroomism gave very helpful advice... Pretty much what I learned is that this force is your shadow, and when you fear it, that allows it to control you. You must face this head on, with no fear, it cannot hurt you unless you are afraid that it will. Confronting the inner demons and integrating the shadow was a big part of what Carl Jung taught. I recommend reading up on him if you still need help.


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:heartpump: { { { ṧ◎ηḯ¢ αʟ¢ℌ℮мƴ } } } :heartpump:


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InvisibleFreakQlibrium
Son of Uncle Meat
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Registered: 06/06/02
Posts: 19,058
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Re: A Scary experience....... [Re: Adamist]
    #740849 - 07/12/02 07:34 AM (15 years, 2 months ago)

Kick that old demon in the slats in other words....LO....I'm superficially wrare of Carl Jung but have never taken the time to really delve into his work in any kind of detail, but thanks for the recommendation........I guess the only thing that I forgot to mention in my account(s) of my "evil twin" attacking those 2 people was that the first time, I was passed out on DXM and the 2nd time I had just blacked out while coming down from 7 hits(my biggest dose ever) of acid.........but in both cases the people that emcountered my evil apparition were drug/substance free.......which is the most important testimony as to the validity of their experience(IMO)


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"Being crazier than a shithouse rat is not sufficient grounds for banishment"



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OfflineMadDhAdDeR420
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Registered: 07/02/02
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Re: A Scary experience....... [Re: Adamist]
    #740887 - 07/12/02 07:58 AM (15 years, 2 months ago)

my girlfriend goes through the same experiances sometimes. Becarefull if you decide to see how far the rabbit hole goes because when your in that state of mind your in another world. Allthough your body is there you can still get hurt or even die. To what it sounds like your mind will expand so much that it takes you to another world a world of the dead posible. Some peeoples mind is so out there that ghost can accutal touch them when the two worlds meet. My girlfriend has been choked by somthing that wasn't there. And also been grabed and pulled out the water by somthing that wasn't there. Her mind is amazing she knows things that happens although no one told her. She'll dream and in her dreams she just dreams it i don't understand it fully but it amazing. Your mind is so powerfull that it takes you to other worlds. Don't be scared of it but u better be aware that if you get hurt there you will acutal it hurt if you die there you will not wake up. So if you decide to see how far the rabbit hole goes just remember you will never find the bottom and you will have some powerfull, hatefull, loving experiences you never know it all depends were your mind took you. You not in your world. Just think you could wake up in your room in that state of mind but in the darkness isn't your darkness its a darkness of another. Hell it could me some freaky ass pshyco path that sees you as fresh meet. So BECAREFULLY. You know how you were paralized when u woke up that from your mind not coming back right away. And the chokeing it either was your mind couldn't tell your body to breath or that when your mind took you to that world whatever was there didn't want you there and was chokeing you. Read up on it you have a very powerfull mind but learn how to use it and learn why it does what it does because if you go find the end of the rabbit hole un-experienced in that world and how your mind can work in that world you will get hurt. KNowledge is power. You mind is more power full then you think. Use that gift. Becarefull!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Have fun. And remember you only live once.

Have a good day and good dreams and remember you can control more then you think you just need to learn how to use it. Good luck.


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Live life to the fullest.


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InvisibleUlysees
Power of Lard

Registered: 10/06/01
Posts: 5,060
Re: A Scary experience....... [Re: FreakQlibrium]
    #741027 - 07/12/02 09:23 AM (15 years, 2 months ago)

Strange dream, Freak. It would be interesting to see if there is anything deeper, or if the dream is just that; a fear of going deeper, like a movie set, with no more actual depth for you to explore. I lean towards the latter, I don't think there are any "easter eggs" that we can find in our dreams, but that's probably another issue.

Have you seen The Cell? It stars Jennifer Lopez and Vincent D'Onofrio. Pretty cool trip movie related to dreams and nightmares.


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OfflineCaliChronic
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Registered: 06/23/02
Posts: 111
Loc: Gulf Coast, USA
Last seen: 14 years, 10 months
Re: A Scary experience....... [Re: FreakQlibrium]
    #741402 - 07/12/02 11:58 AM (15 years, 2 months ago)

the paralytic state is caused by your body actually being semi-paralyzed as you enter REM sleep...ever had a dream that you couldnt move?


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...
overgrow


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OfflineShroomalicious
You may say I'ma dreamer...

Registered: 06/20/02
Posts: 319
Loc: The Shire
Last seen: 14 years, 8 months
Re: A Scary experience....... [Re: FreakQlibrium]
    #741736 - 07/12/02 03:07 PM (15 years, 2 months ago)

You are not alone in this experience. It doesn't mean you are insane or evil. This "bizzarre" experience is "normal"...hopefully you can take some comfort in this. Love to you!


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Shroomalicious - :smile: I love you and in doing so I love myself, because we ARE all one :smile: - "An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth leaves the whole world blind and toothless". - Mahatma Ghandi


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InvisibleUlysees
Power of Lard

Registered: 10/06/01
Posts: 5,060
Re: A Scary experience....... [Re: Shroomalicious]
    #741779 - 07/12/02 03:25 PM (15 years, 2 months ago)

Yes, it was relatively normal, it being a dream and all...

Freak, what kind of meaning do you put in dreams? I think they are the reflections of our pools of consciousness... I think that "our consciousness" is just that; the awareness that we are aware. That of course isn't a negative thing, and there's much we can play around with.
I don't think we "need" external assurances to make us in any way complete. Sure, two or more people in union can create something different than the individual can, but they aren't really creating anything more than a set of feelings and in turn beliefs of what the other person is feeling. (A sad outlook, I know, but I can't find a mate at the moment. )

Where am I going with this? I have no idea, so I'll stop now. I think I just wanted to know what your theory about dreaming is. We've all got one, or two.

Later Freak, nice thread.


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General Interest >> Philosophy, Sociology & Psychology

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