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OfflineToddo
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Girl advice. Updated.
    #7394657 - 09/11/07 02:30 AM (13 years, 5 months ago)

I really do love reading these type of threads.  The responses are a perfect mix of humor, useful knowledge and entertainment.  Now it comes time for me to contribute one...


SO!  I'll be the first to admit I'm horribly unexperienced around women.  I just don't have a lot of exposer to them.  I've dated before.. but I've never really been into anything serous.  I guess its just a combo of high standards in personality and being kind of a loner.  (and of course lack of social skills!) 

I had one experience in high school where I sat next to this girl.  She was 'strange'. She was also very cute.  We talked a little bit and she showed me some story she was writing and some of her sketches. (which were bad ass.)  This girl was perfect for me. Writes random story's, draws, seemed like a loner.  I remember her telling me she was really happy to have met me and that she got to sit next to me.  (hell yeah!)  Me, being a dumbass just blushed and mumbled something or other.  Anyway, next day she fucking leaves the school to take her GED and start community college early.  I heard about this from one for her friends.  That was that.  The perfect girl gone from my life.

Fast forward 2 years.  I'm taking an English course at my local community college.  It was a small crowded classroom so I kind of just kept to myself.  I also showed up stoned to the first couple of meetings.  Well.. I end up showing up early (the 4th meeting in) and decide to sit in a new place.  I walk down the row and I see this beautiful girl.  We looked at each other for a moment longer then a normal look should take.  I knew that face.. but from where.  and what was up with that look??  I sat on the row next to her and one seat back.  It then hit me like a ton of bricks.  I looked over her shoulder and saw her name.  It was that same girl!!  I have seriously thought about this girl ever since I met her that last year of high school. 

Now, if you have ever taken a course at a community college, you know there is always that random fucking old man/women who sits in the front and needs to interrupt the professor every 2 seconds.  Well.. we have this fucking huge guerrilla that has about 5 flash drives around his neck, weighs about 500 pounds and will not SHUT the fuck up.    So I'm sitting in my seat..my mind still trying to confirm this is the same girl.  I then hear that ape come in and start talking to everyone. Alright.. I feel kind of bad calling him an ape... hes a nice guy... but hes just annoying as hell.  ...Anyway, he starts asking people to take notes for him (on that paper that writes on 2 sheets at once)  He asks the girl then me if  I could take notes for him.  I just politely declined.  After he got up to ask some other people people, the girl turned around slowly to look at me.  We just looked at each other for a moment and busted out laughing.  Guinean laughter.    We talked a little bit.. and for the reminder of class we kind of smiled at each other every time this guy would make some strange noise or ask off tangent questions. 

I wanted to catch her after class but she took of real fast.  I missed class today...so I'll be seeing her again on Wednesday.  I REALLY want to ask this girl out... shes even more beautiful then I remember her.  (which also makes me wonder if she already has a boyfriend...) I haven't felt this way about a girl in a LONG time.  I've got the butterfly's and everything!  :grin:

Should I ask her out for a bite to eat after class...or perhaps exchange numbers for studying?  I guess my best bet is to just start a conversation and work it out from there.  I just wanted to get everyone Else's opinion. (I suck at this :frown: )

Thanks for finishing that up.  I've been sipping on a latte so I kind of got carried away on the length.  oh well.. Girl advice threads tend to be read even if they are long!  (or at least I hope they are :smirk:)


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Shroomery Composition Contest


Edited by Toddo (09/26/07 04:38 PM)


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OfflineTurntableJunky
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Re: Girl advice!!!! [Re: Toddo]
    #7394664 - 09/11/07 02:33 AM (13 years, 5 months ago)

Ask her out. If she has a boyfriend then she has a boyfriend :shrug:


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Invisiblejewunit
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Re: Girl advice!!!! [Re: Toddo]
    #7394666 - 09/11/07 02:34 AM (13 years, 5 months ago)

I ain't a swooner so I'm not gonna give any advice.
But good luck!


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OfflineS4mm1ch
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Re: Girl advice!!!! [Re: Toddo]
    #7394668 - 09/11/07 02:35 AM (13 years, 5 months ago)

fuck the bullshit just stick it in her


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“What is evil? Killing is evil, lying is evil, slandering is evil, abuse is evil, gossip is evil: envy is evil, hatred is evil, to cling to false doctrine is evil; all these things are evil. And what is the root of evil? Desire is the root of evil, illusion is the root of evil.”


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Invisibletiny_rabid_birds
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Re: Girl advice!!!! [Re: Toddo]
    #7394680 - 09/11/07 02:39 AM (13 years, 5 months ago)

well dude, it sounds like you already have a plan. just start talking to her. if it does turn out to be the same girl, bring it up. be like.. "didn't you go to my high school for a while" and just continue making small talk. after you two are comfortable talking, invite her to get a coffee or something to eat.

from there you can find out more about her. whether she's dating or not, etc. good luck mang.


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Offlinesublimistri
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Re: Girl advice!!!! [Re: Toddo]
    #7394686 - 09/11/07 02:42 AM (13 years, 5 months ago)

If I were you I probably would. lots of eye contact/smiling is always a good sign :thumbup:


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Tradelist
My Ethnobotanical Garden
Cup Greenhouse Tek. Make small sturdy pots (With detachable grenhouse tops) with cups.


Your human friend will have to dose atropine uninformed, I will not spread information that may harm a cat. - Wiccan_Seeker


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OfflineIolaa
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Re: Girl advice!!!! [Re: sublimistri]
    #7394736 - 09/11/07 03:12 AM (13 years, 5 months ago)

you at least have a solid reason to get her number. you're a stoner, you miss class, you need to know what's up. after you got it, ask her if she wants to go out.

you could even mix a little whisky in a coke before to find the courage to do it. that worked out for me once.;)


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OfflineToddo
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Re: Girl advice!!!! [Re: tiny_rabid_birds]
    #7394760 - 09/11/07 03:23 AM (13 years, 5 months ago)

Thanks for responses guys.  I think I'll definitely  play off the 'I miss to much class...lets study!'  As tiny rabid said, I'll be sure to work on getting comfortable talking with her before I ask her out.  I'll just make sure to show up early before class and catch up to her after class. (all just introductory small talk)  Then I shall make my move.. which move that is... I don't know. :lol:

Oh, and I feel strangely calm around her so I think I'll skip on the whisky/coke combo. :grin:


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Shroomery Composition Contest


Edited by Toddo (09/11/07 03:23 AM)


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InvisibleTYL3R
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Re: Girl advice!!!! [Re: Toddo]
    #7394775 - 09/11/07 03:27 AM (13 years, 5 months ago)

My advice - just tell her what you told us.

Dont hesitate to ask her out.

But do get to know her a little beforehand.


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OfflineSneezingPenis
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Re: Girl advice!!!! [Re: TYL3R]
    #7395033 - 09/11/07 05:38 AM (13 years, 5 months ago)

every woman wants a funny guy.... funny is for girls what tits are to guys. So you either make her laugh at you, or with you.
go to class early and hope she is there. If someone is sitting on one side of her, plop right down on the other side and say "how does it feel sitting next to the worlds _______ ________". insert something funny or witty.
Funny: Greatest Paper Rock Scissors player - you may get a weird look, but you can always challenge her, and if she laughs and you start playing, then you can do one of those gay little, "if I win, I get your number, if I lose, you get my number".
Witty: worst conversation starter - it's reverse psychology and forces a reply as well as shows humility.


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Offlinesublimistri
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Re: Girl advice!!!! [Re: SneezingPenis]
    #7395051 - 09/11/07 05:48 AM (13 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

YawningAnus said:
every woman wants a funny guy.... funny is for girls what tits are to guys. So you either make her laugh at you, or with you.
go to class early and hope she is there. If someone is sitting on one side of her, plop right down on the other side and say "how does it feel sitting next to the worlds _______ ________". insert something funny or witty.
Funny: Greatest Paper Rock Scissors player - you may get a weird look, but you can always challenge her, and if she laughs and you start playing, then you can do one of those gay little, "if I win, I get your number, if I lose, you get my number".
Witty: worst conversation starter - it's reverse psychology and forces a reply as well as shows humility.




If hes not a funny kind of guy, i dunno if "trying" to be funny will work.. Most of the really funny stuff comes natural sometimes unexpected (atleast for me). And for getting the number I wouldnt play a game for it... I would just close with it. Before saying your goodbye.. Just be like "let me get your number", or "do you have a number I can reach you at". Those two work for me. I like using the second one better because then... "Do you have a number I can reach you at" if she says no, then you really know shes not interested she has to have a phone number. I remember having a girl say no to me on that one once, and i was just like damn you dont have a phone number. Good thing it was on a close, because I wouldve rather not have done that in middle of a conversation and get the no, that wouldve been akward.


--------------------
Tradelist
My Ethnobotanical Garden
Cup Greenhouse Tek. Make small sturdy pots (With detachable grenhouse tops) with cups.


Your human friend will have to dose atropine uninformed, I will not spread information that may harm a cat. - Wiccan_Seeker


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OfflineToddo
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Re: Girl advice!!!! [Re: SneezingPenis]
    #7395113 - 09/11/07 06:37 AM (13 years, 5 months ago)

Dude, I could never get myself to recite one of those catch phrases.  I think they're way to corny and it would just come out creepy coming from me.  I don't have the right energy to do shit like that.  :lol: 

But luckily, I'm pretty good about being witty around people I just meet.  (sometimes at my own expense)  I use humor as a major tool for getting to know people.   

God, I really don't want to fuck this up.  I'll just be happy once I get passed the introduction/BS small talk in one piece.


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Shroomery Composition Contest


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InvisibleRandalFlagg
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Re: Girl advice!!!! [Re: SneezingPenis]
    #7395279 - 09/11/07 08:35 AM (13 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

YawningAnus said:
every woman wants a funny guy.... funny is for girls what tits are to guys.





True.


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Offlinemakaveli8x8
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Re: Girl advice!!!! [Re: RandalFlagg]
    #7395294 - 09/11/07 08:44 AM (13 years, 5 months ago)

:whacker:


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Offlinesublimistri
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Re: Girl advice!!!! [Re: makaveli8x8]
    #7395303 - 09/11/07 08:46 AM (13 years, 5 months ago)



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Tradelist
My Ethnobotanical Garden
Cup Greenhouse Tek. Make small sturdy pots (With detachable grenhouse tops) with cups.


Your human friend will have to dose atropine uninformed, I will not spread information that may harm a cat. - Wiccan_Seeker


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OfflineLeinahtan
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Re: Girl advice!!!! [Re: sublimistri]
    #7395712 - 09/11/07 12:16 PM (13 years, 5 months ago)

confidence.


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Offlinemorphius2661
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Re: Girl advice!!!! [Re: Leinahtan]
    #7395869 - 09/11/07 01:17 PM (13 years, 5 months ago)

conveniently forget your book one day and ask if you can share with her. Take it from there.


--------------------
"It is dangerous to be right in matters on which the estabilished authorities are wrong."


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InvisibleBERSERK DESTROYER
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Re: Girl advice!!!! [Re: Toddo]
    #7395928 - 09/11/07 01:36 PM (13 years, 5 months ago)

Get to know her a little better, then if the time comes, make a move. Don't make a big situation out of it when it's not at all- casually get her number, and see where things go. You'll be kicking yourself for years if you do nothing.

If you do ask, either she'll say no and you won't care after a few weeks, or she'll say yes and then you're right where you want to be. There's nothing to lose.


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Disclaimer: If you have any kind of heart condition, my posts are not for you. You could literally die from reading the first couple of words in any one of them. Scroll down the page, live your life and prosper, but don't read my posts because your heart will probably explode. I am not joking.


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Offlinesublimistri
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Re: Girl advice!!!! [Re: BERSERK DESTROYER]
    #7396165 - 09/11/07 02:44 PM (13 years, 5 months ago)

Toddo is she touchy with you? Touching is very rememorable. Also a very good sign, probably one of the best ones out there other than alot of eye contact and smiles.

Quote:

"The common view of kino (note: kino = touching) is that you're giving the woman pleasure and that this arouses her and makes her attached to you.

That is certainly true, and we're lucky we live in a time when doing kino with a woman is considered acceptable as soon as you start getting to know her. In older times, guys like Casanova had to be extraordinarily seductive with their *words* just so they could get to the point where they could begin to use kino.

But the key thing to understand about kino is that when you initiate it with a chick whom you're just getting to know, is that it isn't merely an arousing stimulus, it also challenges the barriers between you.

The presence of those invisible barriers which you both maintain in your minds is really the key difference between being lovers and strangers.

Typical AFC (clueless "nice" guy) behavior is to respect those barriers too much and to never challenge them. That by definition maintains the barriers, leaving them in place.

Doesn't matter how well he gets to know the chick, if he leaves those barriers in place he will never be her lover--THAT is why he ends up in the friend category. Because he actually reinforced the barriers instead of destroying them.

Anyway, the next level up from AFC is to realize that you have to crumble those barriers, so you work on them, but you're still leery about causing any anxiety, and still a bit nervous about challenging the barriers. So you look for excuses to touch, or you reach out and caress her but it has a slightly rushed quality because you're trying to mask some underlying nervousness.

Ultimately where you want to get to is the point where you recognize that for a woman, the experience of having you challenging the barriers is not ONLY a source of anxiety for her, but is also a source of EXCITEMENT.

And the idea is to shift the balance so that she experiences more excitement than anxiety.

Ever see a baby fall down? Notice how they don't know whether to laugh it off or cry so they look to their parents to see the parents face? If the parent frowns with concern then the baby starts crying. If the parent smiles, the baby starts laughing.

Same with women. When you are entering new territory with a woman by challenging the "touch barriers" between you and her, then you have to do it calmly and confidently and that CAUSES her to experience it as exciting. If you do it nervously she'll experience it as something that isn't right and that makes her uncomfortable.

One of the best ways to show confidence is to do it slowly, instead of rushing it. Nervous people rush things to mask their nervousness.

Nervous people also look away, so you calmly make eye contact. And nervous people look serious, so be sure to smile a lot.

Nervous people also make their voice tense, so you make yours relaxed, and make your posture very open and relaxed rather than being closed and tense.

All these things will convey confidence causing her mind to interpret your touch as a source of excitement, rather than a source of anxiety.

The more you understand (and vicariously feel) the way your touch EXCITES her, the more you will naturally become confident about doing it.

Besides conveying confidence, the other thing you need to do with kino is to strike a balance so it isn't either too challenging, nor too tame.

As you start slowly caressing her--her hand or her arm or her waist or back, or maybe feeling her cheek or her hair with your hand--the ideal to strive for is that you want to keep her gently balanced on the very edge of being too excited, so it is never too much for her to handle, nor so mild that it becomes tame."







It works just recently I had a girl attract me using it, and I did the same to her. We were both very sexually attracted to eachother, I know we could both tell. I waited too long and fell into a friends category with her (Besides the fact that I was cockblocked almost 24/7 while being with her)... Which fuckin sucks shes goin out with some retard right now who everyone down these two blocks makes fun of. And the cockblocker didnt even get as far as I did, I slept with her a few times, we never had sex, though we did get close a couple times. Sometimes I feel like she uses me to get her bf all jealoused up too, I dont ever goto her house really anymore. He wont fuck her... And I have to hear the complaints on that (If you think im gonna sit there and be an emotional tampon you can kiss my ass).

Kino works really fucking good too, especially if you slowly escalate it into more sexual touches over time. My bus driver used to call me cassinova... And He made me sit with my hands on the seat (where he could see them) more than half the time. Its wierd tho... Im the only guy who was allowed to have girls sit in the back and with a guy, our busdriver seperated girls from guys and girls in the front guys in the back (I did kino and talked to the busdriver alot, I was the last stop of the bus, it really worked out for me getting a good relation with the busdriver). The bus was my "playing field" (due to good one on one convos). <-- back in highschool. My ex tells me how she wants to go lesbian (I dont live in her town anymore) I find that hilarious. I had most the girls on my bus attracted. Back then I used to practice my conversation, and kino, and had high confidence... After I moved.. im basically in jail stuck in a small town with nothing to do so I sit at home alot (my confidence is on an all time low right now, I thought mushrooms would help me find myself again, so far no good.. I cant trigger the type of trip im looking for).

The problem with kino is you dont wanna come off as trying to touch her or escalate too fast, its gotta be somewhat natural, practice it on friends and get it to be part of your conversation. Even If you dont use kino on this girl... Get it to be natural with you, trust me it will help you out alot more than you think in the long run once its natural. Kino alone has gotten me laid before.--->V

I even used fast escalation because I was good at it at the time (Besides the fact we just met eachother and only had a couple hours to chill before we left to never see eachother again), Went from walking and talking with light touches on the arm, then after I felt we were more comfortable with eachother... You will be able to start telling comfort levels too using kino, I started getting somewhat more sexual as to from touching on the arm while conversation to the hand, then after holding her hand, Id make my hand rub her thigh alot... then I noticed she had a belly button ring which is when we started getting more sexual touchy, brought the belly button ring to attention (gave it a small comment), and then started touching it. <-- This set off fire, I could feel alot of sexual emotions while doing this. When we sat down I had her sit on my lap then went from playing with her belly button ring to playing with her pussy. But you got to work your way up slowly with kino, if you just go in with a sexual touch.. she might feel offended. This is why just walking up and grabbin ass could get you slapped. There was no escalation and she feels abused, or offended.

I might get flamed for this post but fuck it, this will help you out. Dont take my word for it, try it. Kino also builds confidence, it makes you more confortable around other people.

Maybe theres some females here that know about kino who can back me up on some of my statements. Girls are natural kino artist. Guys are more slow at this kind of stuff.

Im gonna stop typing, ive typed TOO much here. And I hope this helps you, if you use it, then it WILL.


-sub


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Tradelist
My Ethnobotanical Garden
Cup Greenhouse Tek. Make small sturdy pots (With detachable grenhouse tops) with cups.


Your human friend will have to dose atropine uninformed, I will not spread information that may harm a cat. - Wiccan_Seeker


Edited by sublimistri (09/11/07 03:00 PM)


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Invisiblemushbaby
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Re: Girl advice!!!! [Re: Toddo]
    #7396431 - 09/11/07 03:33 PM (13 years, 5 months ago)

You keep talking like you have just met this girl but in reality you knew her awhile back, start with that. I think the key is to just get the conversation going. Seems like she remembers you too! Good sign.

From what you said about her some good conversation starters would be asking about her writings or drawings (tell her you remember they were really good. Genuine compliments work wonders)

If you ask her out she might not go, but if you don't ask her out she definitely won't go. Give it a shot. It might mean something that you have seen her again after a couple of years.


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