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Invisiblewhattheheck
Chief Love Lover
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Registered: 06/01/07
Posts: 7,380
Loc: Denver Colorado
Standing up for ourselves. Thoughts??
    #7383826 - 09/08/07 01:59 PM (16 years, 4 months ago)

It seems like a lot of us are to one extent or another being "used" (call a spade a spade huh?) by friends, family etc.

My wife and I are going through some major housecleaning when it comes to our "friends". Of course we love these people or we wouldn't be around them or give and do so much for them. But we're reaching an age (30) when it seems that the line between just kinda being down on one's luck or having had some bad breaks and needing help contrasted with being the type of person who makes crappy choices at least a good amount of the time (and then needing help) is becoming a little blurry to us.

We've decided that for almost all of these folks, we're just enabling them, and our efforts would be better off serving our family and the friends who are committed to growing in real ways.

Can't help but to feel a little bit like a self serving asshole. But the absence of phone calls, texts, talks about their lives, and so on is rather freeing.

Anyone else been in this spot or had to make similar choices?


--------------------
A society whose whole idea is to eliminate suffering and bring it's members the greatest amount of comfort and pleasure is doomed to be destroyed -Thomas Merton


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Offlinelbtchnlgs
Feel like a Stranger
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Registered: 04/12/07
Posts: 672
Last seen: 9 years, 6 months
Re: Standing up for ourselves. Thoughts?? [Re: whattheheck]
    #7383885 - 09/08/07 02:12 PM (16 years, 4 months ago)

Sometimes you just have to let these people fade away, if they are a true friend you will become close once again, if not- they will find somebody else to get 'help' from.

good luck, it's gotta be tough


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