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ManianFH
living in perverty
Registered: 07/06/04
Posts: 14,914
Last seen: 9 seconds
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no more sex for me and my girlfriend
#7146118 - 07/08/07 11:43 AM (16 years, 8 months ago) |
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we had a long and tearful (for her) discussion about it last night. my girlfriends sex drive is gone..so whenever we do have sex, she lays there like a corpse and I have to do everything. I talked to her about it using the term 'one sided'.. with regard to our sexual relationship, and she got really upset.
She said with her summerschool, and volunteer work, and her part time job, plus the prozac that she just started for her bi-polar problem, that her sex drive is completely gone. Pretty much the conversation ended with me trying to comfort her and telling her that I would be more understanding of her inability to feel any kind of sexual drive for me anymore. Our non-sexual relationship is very healthy, other than her pessimism towards other people, and we are doing fine.
I have posted before about her, and how she doesnt like to give blowjobs, or handjobs. I dont know.. maybe this makes me shallow, but I really enjoy these things in a relationship. Am I an asshole for wanting these kinds of things?
I have pretty much decided to not come on to her at all until she is ready, and actually comes on to me. I have dealt with all kinds of sexual relationships before, and can wait until she is ready, if ever again...?
I dont know how to ask her to start performing sexual favors (like an occasional blowjob or handjob), and think that is pretty much out of the question at this point in our sexual relationship..
-------------------- notapillow said: "you are going about this endeavor all wrong. clear your mind of useless fear and concern. buy the ticket, take the ride, and all that.... " ChrisWho said: "It's all about the journey, not the destination."
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Crystal G
Registered: 06/05/07
Posts: 19,584
Loc: outer space
Last seen: 9 months, 24 days
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Re: no more sex for me and my girlfriend [Re: ManianFH]
#7146126 - 07/08/07 11:46 AM (16 years, 8 months ago) |
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meth, ghb, mdpv, DOC, other great chems are excellent aphrodisiacs
will turn the shyest schoolgirl into the horniest tramp no joke!
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AtPeace
POWD
Registered: 06/16/07
Posts: 200
Loc: Florida
Last seen: 16 years, 3 months
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Re: no more sex for me and my girlfriend [Re: ManianFH]
#7146132 - 07/08/07 11:47 AM (16 years, 8 months ago) |
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there is is a new womens viagra made in the netherlads look it up.
-------------------- Im FREE........ Until the 7th.
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ManianFH
living in perverty
Registered: 07/06/04
Posts: 14,914
Last seen: 9 seconds
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Re: no more sex for me and my girlfriend [Re: AtPeace]
#7146139 - 07/08/07 11:49 AM (16 years, 8 months ago) |
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Quote:
AtPeace said: there is is a new womens viagra made in the netherlads look it up.
thanks....
-------------------- notapillow said: "you are going about this endeavor all wrong. clear your mind of useless fear and concern. buy the ticket, take the ride, and all that.... " ChrisWho said: "It's all about the journey, not the destination."
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: no more sex for me and my girlfriend [Re: ManianFH]
#7146141 - 07/08/07 11:50 AM (16 years, 8 months ago) |
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If she has no sex drive then she has no sex drive. That's not something you can force someone into.
Does she want her sex drive back? Have you explained to her how important sexual contact is and is she willing to try to do something to rectify the situation (stop the Prozac, etc..)?
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Silversoul
Rhizome
Registered: 01/01/05
Posts: 23,576
Loc: The Barricades
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Re: no more sex for me and my girlfriend [Re: ManianFH]
#7146143 - 07/08/07 11:50 AM (16 years, 8 months ago) |
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It sounds like you really love his girl. I think you're right not to try to impose sex on her, but of course you still have needs too. If you can get by on masturbation alone(I manage to do just fine with this) then that's great. Otherwise, you'll either need to have an open relationship or else it will just be a countdown until you break up. Maybe you'd be better off as friends. Though as others have said, there may be things she can do to increase her sex drive.
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AtPeace
POWD
Registered: 06/16/07
Posts: 200
Loc: Florida
Last seen: 16 years, 3 months
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Re: no more sex for me and my girlfriend [Re: Silversoul]
#7146173 - 07/08/07 11:57 AM (16 years, 8 months ago) |
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Being serious just saw it on CNN its out of R&D you can buy it.
-------------------- Im FREE........ Until the 7th.
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Krystal Klear
Stranger
Registered: 05/09/07
Posts: 1,148
Loc: Mushroomvilletopiatonopol...
Last seen: 2 years, 4 months
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Re: no more sex for me and my girlfriend [Re: ManianFH]
#7146210 - 07/08/07 12:07 PM (16 years, 8 months ago) |
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Quote:
mickdawg666 said: we had a long and tearful (for her) discussion about it last night. my girlfriends sex drive is gone..so whenever we do have sex, she lays there like a corpse and I have to do everything. I talked to her about it using the term 'one sided'.. with regard to our sexual relationship, and she got really upset.
She said with her summerschool, and volunteer work, and her part time job, plus the prozac that she just started for her bi-polar problem, that her sex drive is completely gone. Pretty much the conversation ended with me trying to comfort her and telling her that I would be more understanding of her inability to feel any kind of sexual drive for me anymore. Our non-sexual relationship is very healthy, other than her pessimism towards other people, and we are doing fine.
I have posted before about her, and how she doesnt like to give blowjobs, or handjobs. I dont know.. maybe this makes me shallow, but I really enjoy these things in a relationship. Am I an asshole for wanting these kinds of things?
I have pretty much decided to not come on to her at all until she is ready, and actually comes on to me. I have dealt with all kinds of sexual relationships before, and can wait until she is ready, if ever again...?
I dont know how to ask her to start performing sexual favors (like an occasional blowjob or handjob), and think that is pretty much out of the question at this point in our sexual relationship..
Seriously I feel for you bro.... it's gotta suck being able to do something you most enjuoy with someone you love then oneday get cut off from it.
-------------------- Nothing I say is meant to be taken seriously. -Krystal
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Brainiac
Rogue Scientist
Registered: 04/29/06
Posts: 13,259
Loc: 與您的女朋
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Re: no more sex for me and my girlfriend [Re: Krystal Klear]
#7146230 - 07/08/07 12:10 PM (16 years, 8 months ago) |
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At lest her father didn't brainwash her by saying " you only good for sex" and now she thanks men are only going to use her for sex.
-------------------- Fair is Fair
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Left Nut City
Stranger
Registered: 03/27/01
Posts: 2,360
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Re: no more sex for me and my girlfriend [Re: ManianFH]
#7146243 - 07/08/07 12:13 PM (16 years, 8 months ago) |
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Just curious, how old is she??
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ManianFH
living in perverty
Registered: 07/06/04
Posts: 14,914
Last seen: 9 seconds
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Re: no more sex for me and my girlfriend [Re: Krystal Klear]
#7146247 - 07/08/07 12:15 PM (16 years, 8 months ago) |
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I think youre right, in the end, if I wait too long, I will either resent her for this, and end up doing something that will hurt her.
Krystal - its especially hard in this respect because when we first started dating, we did have sex a lot, and she said that I was one of the few guys who could really keep up with her sex drive. I was having sex with her a lot of times when I wasn't really in the mood, but did anyways, because I knew thats what would make her happy.
I dont know man. I do love her, and will wait. She is an ex-meth addict, so im not even going to try and suggest using drugs for sex drive.
-------------------- notapillow said: "you are going about this endeavor all wrong. clear your mind of useless fear and concern. buy the ticket, take the ride, and all that.... " ChrisWho said: "It's all about the journey, not the destination."
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ManianFH
living in perverty
Registered: 07/06/04
Posts: 14,914
Last seen: 9 seconds
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Re: no more sex for me and my girlfriend [Re: Left Nut City]
#7146252 - 07/08/07 12:15 PM (16 years, 8 months ago) |
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Quote:
Left Nut City said: Just curious, how old is she??
shes 19, im 25
-------------------- notapillow said: "you are going about this endeavor all wrong. clear your mind of useless fear and concern. buy the ticket, take the ride, and all that.... " ChrisWho said: "It's all about the journey, not the destination."
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Left Nut City
Stranger
Registered: 03/27/01
Posts: 2,360
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Re: no more sex for me and my girlfriend [Re: ManianFH]
#7146269 - 07/08/07 12:18 PM (16 years, 8 months ago) |
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Damn, I could understand better if she was significantly older but for a 19 year old girl to have no sex drive is indeed quite puzzling.
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lolwhut
ahsgfiuahfuope
Registered: 06/29/07
Posts: 763
Last seen: 13 years, 4 months
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Re: no more sex for me and my girlfriend [Re: Left Nut City]
#7146284 - 07/08/07 12:22 PM (16 years, 8 months ago) |
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Yeah dude, your a truely nice guy for being the way you are and you are not an asshole for wanting those things. I recommend relationship therapist and her seeing a doctor cause sex is super important and In my opinion the only reason we exist on this earth
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tiny_rabid_birds
Nocturnal
Registered: 11/08/05
Posts: 15,653
Loc: estados unidos
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Re: no more sex for me and my girlfriend [Re: ManianFH]
#7146305 - 07/08/07 12:26 PM (16 years, 8 months ago) |
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Quote:
mickdawg666 said: I think youre right, in the end, if I wait too long, I will either resent her for this, and end up doing something that will hurt her.
Krystal - its especially hard in this respect because when we first started dating, we did have sex a lot, and she said that I was one of the few guys who could really keep up with her sex drive. I was having sex with her a lot of times when I wasn't really in the mood, but did anyways, because I knew thats what would make her happy.
I dont know man. I do love her, and will wait. She is an ex-meth addict, so im not even going to try and suggest using drugs for sex drive.
wow... that sounds like my old relationship. back when it started, and we were 15, 16, 17 yr old kids, we had great sex alllllll the time. then she got on meds and the sexual aspect of our relationship went south. we stayed together for another 2 years after that because we loved each other, but it certainly was awkward when there were times that she was flat out not interested in sex.
i did a quick google search, and prozac is known to fuck with people's sex lives. "One possible side effect, which remains for the time Prozac is taken, is its effect on sex life. It often reduces desire and can delay or interfere with orgasm, in both women and men."
i wish i could offer you some sort of advice, but i'm not sure what to tell you. just good luck. if you love her, hang in there. and if you really want to be with this girl, consider couples counseling for ideas on how to deal with this.
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Silversoul
Rhizome
Registered: 01/01/05
Posts: 23,576
Loc: The Barricades
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Re: no more sex for me and my girlfriend [Re: ManianFH]
#7146314 - 07/08/07 12:28 PM (16 years, 8 months ago) |
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She might want to look into alternatives to Prozac. I'm sure there are others that won't cause sexual side effects.
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tiny_rabid_birds
Nocturnal
Registered: 11/08/05
Posts: 15,653
Loc: estados unidos
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Re: no more sex for me and my girlfriend [Re: Silversoul]
#7146351 - 07/08/07 12:38 PM (16 years, 8 months ago) |
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i believe welbutrin is an alternative to prozac and it comes with lower risk of decreased sexual drive. but i'm by no means an expert, and that's certainly something she should discuss with her doctor if that's what you're interested in.
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djcube
Backwoods Shaman
Registered: 12/11/02
Posts: 572
Loc: Alaska
Last seen: 3 years, 6 months
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Re: no more sex for me and my girlfriend [Re: Silversoul]
#7146359 - 07/08/07 12:39 PM (16 years, 8 months ago) |
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That sucks. I'm lucky enough to have a 27 year old gf with more drive than I can handle. She gets mad at me all the time cuz I dont put out enough. I've had a gf with a low sex drive, but she had minimal emotional problems, so I had no problem converting her into my slut.
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Silversoul
Rhizome
Registered: 01/01/05
Posts: 23,576
Loc: The Barricades
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Re: no more sex for me and my girlfriend [Re: djcube]
#7146388 - 07/08/07 12:47 PM (16 years, 8 months ago) |
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Quote:
djcube said: That sucks. I'm lucky enough to have a 27 year old gf with more drive than I can handle. She gets mad at me all the time cuz I dont put out enough.
I don't think I'd like that situation either. I'd feel kind of threatened by a girl whose sex drive was that much more than mine. The ideal for me is a girl with exactly the same sex drive as me.
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crazy__diamond
Strangest
Registered: 10/03/06
Posts: 32
Last seen: 16 years, 2 months
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Re: no more sex for me and my girlfriend [Re: djcube]
#7146393 - 07/08/07 12:49 PM (16 years, 8 months ago) |
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well i'm no sexpert but it seems if you just wait this one out, she'll come around in some time...
like you said, let her come to you. she's still human and in some time she'll want it...she mostlikely just doesnt like the 'forced' aspect of it.
if you're always the one initiating, she's always just 'going along with it', and its not as pleasurable, thus the drive is gone.
not saying you do, but if you always have sex at the same time or place or something, STOP
routines kill sex drive
-------------------- well, you know, we all want to change the world... ...but there's only so much time left in this crazy world, i'm just crumblin' erb.
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