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OfflineDistortedEyes
hello
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Registered: 03/16/04
Posts: 875
Loc: uk
Last seen: 16 years, 6 months
i think i might have figured out why I'm depressed.
    #7129800 - 07/04/07 08:05 PM (16 years, 8 months ago)

for a while I've considered myself quite an introverted person, which now i find ridiculous.

I don't think I've been having enough social interaction and this could be why I'm depressed.

When I'm hanging out with people i have a good time, i end up being the center of attention(somewhat) just because of the way i interact with people.
I can't sit there in the background not saying anything(unless I'm listening), I've always got something to say or an idea of something we could do or a place to go.

I always want to have a good time and for everyone else to have a good time.

Now saying all that stuff sounds kinda retarded to me for some reason, like I'm being big headed or something but i didn't intend it to sound that way.

I seriously think i have some weird problem that i don't want to come across as confident as i really am when I'm around people, encase i seem big headed, or look like an idiot.

What a weird thing?! being insecure about being confident, strange.

I get really energized by hanging out with decent people and when i just sit in the house by my self i quickly start to become really depressed and then because i feel depressed i can't be fucked going out and it just feeds on itself.

The thing that sucks though is that i don't have many people to hang around with anymore because i had a long period of depression where i isolated myself and pushed nearly everyone i know away.
and allot of the people around where i live suck

Fuck, i feel like a fucking idiot, i don't believe i never made the connection between not hanging out with people and being depressed.

I'm not sure what to do with this newfound realization, it's like shit, where do i start?


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Sometimes when I read threads visions of men sword fighting with their genitalia run through my head. - sadspacemonkey

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OfflineDrCamacho89
Mazel Tuff
Male


Registered: 03/12/07
Posts: 1,981
Last seen: 15 years, 10 months
Re: i think i might have figured out why I'm depressed. [Re: DistortedEyes]
    #7130231 - 07/04/07 10:35 PM (16 years, 8 months ago)

Damn, we sound a lot alike. I was like you for YEARS, not really realizing I was depressed, just how I was. I drank a lot too, not sure if that's you too. I hit a rough patch, got really burned out because of work, and hit rock bottom hard. I came out of it, but I've learned one thing about myself because of it. I relied too much on what others thought of me rather than what I thought of me.

With that line of thinking, I always had friends and with the drinking had some really great times mixed in with some actions I wish I could take back, but foremost I found that being introverted is alright as long as you make sure to hold onto and develop strong relationships with the friends you value the most. You see, while I was the "life of the party" and really confident and was a real "womanizer" from an outside eye, I never let anyone close enough to me to see the real me, out of fear of being judged and not liked. I really don't care who doesn't like me anymore, as long as the friendships and relationships I value think highly of me for knowing the real me.

Not sure if that helped, but I could really relate to a lot of what you're saying. It's great you have recognized your depression. I had no clue until it was too late, and for about 3 months of my life it was living hell because I let myself slip that far.


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"The Highways of Life are Paved with Flat Squirrels who Couldn't Make Up Their Minds"

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InvisibleLand_Crab
NeuroticPsychonaut
Male User Gallery

Registered: 08/29/04
Posts: 2,194
Loc: U.S.
Re: i think i might have figured out why I'm depressed. [Re: DistortedEyes]
    #7130555 - 07/05/07 12:51 AM (16 years, 8 months ago)

So you would say you prefer being around other people than being alone the majority of the time?
Extended periods of isolation will depress virtually everyone - the only difference being that some people tend to desire solitude more than others (introverts, as you know.)
Also, it seems as if you're concerned about coming across as arrogant. Is that fair to say?

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OfflineDistortedEyes
hello
Male


Registered: 03/16/04
Posts: 875
Loc: uk
Last seen: 16 years, 6 months
Re: i think i might have figured out why I'm depressed. [Re: DrCamacho89]
    #7131413 - 07/05/07 06:47 AM (16 years, 8 months ago)

yeah i drank/drink allot as well just to numb the pain/boredom.

That's the other weird thing to, i had friends, in-fact I've had lots of friends but I've never let any of them get close to me, I've always kept them at a distance.

I'd say i like being around people most of the time but with the people i know, i don't really want to be around them all the time because i don't find them all that interesting, we have good times and stuff but i know there is people out there(somewhere) that i would have a better time with.
Or it could just be that I'm not hanging around with all different kind of people, I'm the kinda of person that would hang with anyone as long as they are cool.

And yeah I'd say that I'm concerned with coming across as arrogant I'm not sure why though.

I'm not sure but maybe it could be because i was really hyper and just living 100% when i was a child and all the teachers at school said i was just seeking attention(isn't that what kids do for fuck sake) and i had to see a psychologist.

There was nothing wrong with me, but they drilled it into my head that being who i was wasn't good because the person i was just naturally attracted everyones attention, they didn't like that for some reason.
So i got rejected by all the teachers and kinda my parents, telling me i had to change and everything.

so i think i have this thing now where, if i come across as confident or do something impressive, obviously I'll get attention from that but now getting any attention has been drilled into my head, not just as a bad thing, but as if I'm not worthy of it.

Does that make any sense to anyone?


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Sometimes when I read threads visions of men sword fighting with their genitalia run through my head. - sadspacemonkey

Edited by scottunderflesh (07/05/07 06:54 AM)

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InvisibleDark_Star
train driver pervading a desktop
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Registered: 08/20/04
Posts: 31,859
Loc: Uranus
Re: i think i might have figured out why I'm depressed. [Re: DistortedEyes]
    #7132310 - 07/05/07 12:08 PM (16 years, 8 months ago)

Quote:

I'm not sure but maybe it could be because i was really hyper and just living 100% when i was a child and all the teachers at school said i was just seeking attention(isn't that what kids do for fuck sake) and i had to see a psychologist.

There was nothing wrong with me, but they drilled it into my head that being who i was wasn't good because the person i was just naturally attracted everyones attention, they didn't like that for some reason.
So i got rejected by all the teachers and kinda my parents, telling me i had to change and everything.




:crankey: MOTHERFUCKERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dude, that rang very true to me. School also tried to make me believe that there was something wrong with me, and tried to force counselling and/or meds on me as well, because I've always marched to my own drummer. I told them to fuck off everytime, and I'm very lucky in that my parents are wonderful people who love & accept me for who I am, and always drilled it into me that being unique is a good thing, that I'm a good person, and that there is NOTHING wrong with me.

School can be a truly horrible institution, and if I ever have kids  I will home school them.

That post really struck a chord in me man, and I had to share my experience with school's intolerance of those who come from a totally different mold.  I wish you much luck in finding yourself, and the happiness within. There's a whole lot that I'd like to say to you, as we seem very similar....I have a bunch of shit to do, but I'll get back to you.


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Invisiblepoke smot!
floccinocci floofinator
Male


Registered: 01/08/03
Posts: 5,248
Re: i think i might have figured out why I'm depressed. *DELETED* [Re: DistortedEyes]
    #7133195 - 07/05/07 03:36 PM (16 years, 8 months ago)

Post deleted by poke smot!

Reason for deletion: x


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Offlinefreddurgan
Techgnostic
Male


Registered: 01/11/04
Posts: 3,648
Last seen: 11 years, 9 months
Re: i think i might have figured out why I'm depressed. [Re: poke smot!]
    #7139279 - 07/06/07 09:13 PM (16 years, 8 months ago)

The point that struck a chord with me is that I have friends but I don't find any of them that interesting. I can think of one person that I really value my time with and want to spend more time with. The rest I just don't value them that much despite they are my only social circle at the time.


--------------------
Ishmael
http://www.ishmael.org

Ron Paul 2008!
http://www.ronpaul2008.com/

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Offlinebodynotdead
TrichodermaCultivator
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Registered: 05/10/07
Posts: 271
Loc: U.S.A
Last seen: 15 years, 7 months
Re: i think i might have figured out why I'm depressed. [Re: freddurgan]
    #7143302 - 07/07/07 07:28 PM (16 years, 8 months ago)

I recommend the following treatments for the symptoms of mild to moderate depression:

Exercise.
Aerobic exercise is the most effective treatment I know for mild to moderate depression.

Relaxation techniques.
Breathing exercises, meditation and yoga can help relieve depression.

Dietary changes.
Increasing your intake of foods that provide omega-3 fatty acids (fish such as salmon and sardines, as well as walnuts and freshly ground flaxseeds) can help, perhaps by correcting overactive cell signaling in the brain, which appears to be linked to depression. You may also want to consider taking an omega-3 fatty acid supplement with more DHA than EPA. I also recommend avoiding caffeine and alcohol.

St. John's wort.
This herb appears to work as well as antidepressants for mild to moderate depression. The recommended dosage is 300 mg of an extract, standardized to 0.3% hypericin and 5% hyperforin, taken three times a day with food.

SAM-e.
This supplement, S-adenosyl-methionine (often called "Sammy"), seems to work faster than St. John's wort but is much more expensive ($75 or more per month). Look for enteric-coated tablets providing the butanedisulfonate form.

5-HTP (5-hydroxy-L-tryptophan).
A derivative of the amino acid tryptophan, 5-HTP is converted into neurotransmitter serotonin in the brain. Serotinin helps regulate mood, sleep and appetite. Reduced serotonin levels are associated with depression and 5-HTP may help increase them. However, I would try exercise, St. John's wort and SAM-e first.

In addition, experiment with acupuncture. The World Health Organization recognizes it as effective for treating mild to moderate depression.


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"absolute power corrupts absolutely".
Lord Acton,

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