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 RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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 Does moving in with a friend ruin the friendship? 
#7002965 - 06/03/07 11:32 AM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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I will be moving very soon. I have the opportunity to continue to have my own place or to move in with a good friend (he's probably my best friend). I've never lived with a friend before. I've only ever lived by myself or with a girlfriend. I'm kind of scared that being in such close proximity to each other will cause stress and make us not like each much anymore.
Anybody have any thoughts?
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DNKYD
Turtle!
Registered: 09/23/04
Posts: 12,326
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Re: Does moving in with a friend ruin the friendship? [Re: RandalFlagg]
#7002976 - 06/03/07 11:35 AM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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Yes, it will for the most part. If it doesn't ruin the friendship it will probably put a strain on it. You never really know somebody until you have to live with their irresponsible, sloven ass.
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: Does moving in with a friend ruin the friendship? [Re: DNKYD]
#7002992 - 06/03/07 11:39 AM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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Yeah...I was dreading the slovenly part. My friend is a pig and I'm all neat and shit. My place looks like it could be pictured in an IKEA catalog or something. Meanwhile he has absolutely no furniture or anything to contribute to the household.
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 fantasylndvictm
yup
 
Registered: 03/19/07
Posts: 2,388
Loc: usa
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Re: Does moving in with a friend ruin the friendship? [Re: DNKYD]
#7003013 - 06/03/07 11:46 AM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
DNKYD said:
Yes, it will for the most part. If it doesn't ruin the friendship it will probably put a strain on it. You never really know somebody until you have to live with their irresponsible, sloven ass.
i completely agree. ur best bet is to stay where u are. living with friends do not work. especially if ur used to livin alone then u probly wouldnt like living with ur best friend. i lived with a few of my friends and i still talk to a couple of them and one of them i want to bury alive. so i would say not a good idea.
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"How do we know whether the life of any creature has fulfilled its destiny? I have known the very old to die in bitterness and despair. I have seen young children die before their time but leave behind such a legacy of love and joy that grief for their passing was tempered by the knowledge that their brief lives had given much to others."
"You have answered your own question,Tanis Half-Elven, far better than I could," the Forestmaster said gravely. "Say that that our lives are measured not by gain but by giving." -Dragonlance "Dragons of Autumn Twilight"
If we lived in luxury we would grow soft.
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: Does moving in with a friend ruin the friendship? [Re: fantasylndvictm]
#7003031 - 06/03/07 11:52 AM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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Damn, the more I think about it the worse of an idea it seems. I have nice stuff and he has nothing. I have impeccable credit and he is often broke and in debt. I am neat and he is a slob. I am responsible and he is not. We are both drunks and I think that living together will exacerbate that.
But, at the same time there will be some wild and crazy times which may make up for all of the bad stuff. I'm really torn.
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memes
Blessed
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Posts: 27,785
Loc: In a Tree
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Re: Does moving in with a friend ruin the friendship? [Re: RandalFlagg]
#7003042 - 06/03/07 11:55 AM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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i've lived with friends and girlfriends...
it's only a bad situation if there are bad parts to the mixture (i.e. bad friends, bad girlfriends, bad you).
each situation is different, but yours sounds like it wouldn't be too great, since he's a slob and you're a neat freak (ive been in that situation, had to move out)
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Senor_Doobie
Snake Pit Champion
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Posts: 22,678
Loc: Trump Train
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Re: Does moving in with a friend ruin the friendship? [Re: memes]
#7003067 - 06/03/07 12:01 PM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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Yeah, I mean just to answer the original question, "Will living with a friend ruin the relationship?' the answer is Not necessarily, but it depends very heavily on the people involved. There has to be respect for what each party wants and the people have to be capable of living in a way that makes the other comfortable. Does not sound like your friend and you are a good match, so it very well might. The only thing that might save the friendship would be to sign a short lease, like six months
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DirtMcgirt
in a pinch
Registered: 10/20/04
Posts: 2,213
Loc: city of angels
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Re: Does moving in with a friend ruin the friendship? [Re: RandalFlagg]
#7003068 - 06/03/07 12:01 PM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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Do it. I've never regretted living with some of my better friends even when it got a little tense. That always happens when you live with somebody anyway. Can't be avoided. You just avoid each other for a few days and then your getting drunk on the steps again.....Unless money or women are involved
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"And we, inhabitants of the great coral of the Cosmos, believe the atom (which still we cannot see) to be full matter, whereas, it too, like everything else, is but an embroidery of voids in the Void, and we give the name of being, dense and even eternal, to that dance of inconsistencies, that infinite extension that is identified with absolute Nothingness and that spins from its own non-being the illusion of everything."
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
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Posts: 15,608
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Re: Does moving in with a friend ruin the friendship? [Re: DirtMcgirt]
#7003074 - 06/03/07 12:03 PM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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The money thing might be a problem. I would have to pay a larger share of the bills than him (but I get choice of the best bedroom and I have final say on stuff). Also, I could see him fucking up and not being able to pay his bills.
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DirtMcgirt
in a pinch
Registered: 10/20/04
Posts: 2,213
Loc: city of angels
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Re: Does moving in with a friend ruin the friendship? [Re: RandalFlagg]
#7003109 - 06/03/07 12:15 PM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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If he has never rented out an apartment before, I wouldn't want to be the one to break him into that responsibility.
If he has, I would say you need to give your friend more credit unless he is a walking fuck up
Ask yourself if in 8 months he does fuck up and you guys have to move out, would the previous 8 months have been worth it?
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"And we, inhabitants of the great coral of the Cosmos, believe the atom (which still we cannot see) to be full matter, whereas, it too, like everything else, is but an embroidery of voids in the Void, and we give the name of being, dense and even eternal, to that dance of inconsistencies, that infinite extension that is identified with absolute Nothingness and that spins from its own non-being the illusion of everything."
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
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Posts: 15,608
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Re: Does moving in with a friend ruin the friendship? [Re: DirtMcgirt]
#7003113 - 06/03/07 12:17 PM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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He has rented apartments before. He lives with his parents now.
He is just such a fuckup though. He owes money to the credit card and the local magistrate. He makes good money but he blows it all on dumb shit instead of taking care of important stuff.
That's it...I'm not moving in with him.
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
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Posts: 15,608
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Re: Does moving in with a friend ruin the friendship? [Re: RandalFlagg]
#7003115 - 06/03/07 12:18 PM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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And another thing...I won't be able to leisurely masturbate on the couch anymore.
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Digs
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Re: Does moving in with a friend ruin the friendship? [Re: RandalFlagg]
#7003130 - 06/03/07 12:23 PM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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he won't be there all the time!
i've found that living with people strengthens the bond, but i mean if you're not compatible 
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GrizzyCappy
Explorer of Mind and Matter
Registered: 10/06/06
Posts: 488
Loc: TX - USA
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Re: Does moving in with a friend ruin the friendship? [Re: Digs]
#7003145 - 06/03/07 12:32 PM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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I refuse to clean up after myself, let alone another dude.
I had a roomate once. Dishes stacked up in the sink. We ended up throwing them away because fuzz grew on them. Had to buy new ones.
Never again.
Thank god for the wife that picks up after me.
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sui
I love you.
Registered: 08/20/04
Posts: 32,583
Loc: Cali, Contra Costa Co. 
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Re: Does moving in with a friend ruin the friendship? [Re: GrizzyCappy]
#7003340 - 06/03/07 01:41 PM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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yes.
i learned that a couple times.
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"There is never a wrong note, bend it." Jimi Hendrix
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Ubermensch
Hunter gatherer
Registered: 11/27/06
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Loc: Pac Northwest
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Re: Does moving in with a friend ruin the friendship? [Re: RandalFlagg]
#7003356 - 06/03/07 01:44 PM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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Don't do it. I have a similar situation where I'm clean/organized and my friend makes most of the messes (dishes, shit on the toilet, garbage) and almost never cleans them up. I also did a calculation recently and he uses 91% of the tp in the apartment and buys 0%. Based on your current opinions of this guy, you'll end up thinking less of him if you two move in.
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Once the sin against God was the greatest sin; but God has died, and those sinners died with him. To sin against the earth is now the most dreadful sin, and to esteem the entrails of the unknowable higher than the meaning of the earth!
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: Does moving in with a friend ruin the friendship? [Re: Ubermensch]
#7003375 - 06/03/07 01:49 PM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Ubermensch said:
I also did a calculation recently and he uses 91% of the tp in the apartment
hahaha How did you come up with that statistic?
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: Does moving in with a friend ruin the friendship? [Re: RandalFlagg]
#7003489 - 06/03/07 02:17 PM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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Well, I just called him and told him that I wanted to continue living with myself. He understood and everything's cool.
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sui
I love you.
Registered: 08/20/04
Posts: 32,583
Loc: Cali, Contra Costa Co.
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Re: Does moving in with a friend ruin the friendship? [Re: RandalFlagg]
#7003494 - 06/03/07 02:19 PM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
RandalFlagg said:
Well, I just called him and told him that I wanted to continue living with myself. He understood and everything's cool.
good choice. 
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"There is never a wrong note, bend it." Jimi Hendrix
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DrCamacho89
Mazel Tuff
Registered: 03/12/07
Posts: 1,981
Last seen: 15 years, 11 months
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Re: Does moving in with a friend ruin the friendship? [Re: RandalFlagg]
#7003601 - 06/03/07 02:50 PM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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I have been living without a roommate for the first time ever as of 6 months ago. I will NEVER go back. Especially with some of my best friends. I find many of them are great for hanging out with once or twice a week, but damn do they get on my nerves when I come home from a long day of work and just want to watch tv and pass out on the couch.
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"The Highways of Life are Paved with Flat Squirrels who Couldn't Make Up Their Minds"
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