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MushroomTrip
Dr. Teasy Thighs
Registered: 12/02/05
Posts: 14,794
Loc: red panda village
Last seen: 3 years, 25 days
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Forgiving 1
#6818417 - 04/22/07 08:29 AM (16 years, 11 months ago) |
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Forgiving is one of our greatest potentials. And sometimes we suck at it. Lately I've been confronting myself with a lot of that feeling. It seems that for a while I've been stuck somewhere in resentful feelings towards some people who have hurt me and was unable to get over it. I was aware that forgiving was the only real alternative I had but I just couldn't, because I was trying to make it rational. And every time I did that, all these logical arguments came into my mind and were telling me that I had no reasons to do that, that those people who did me wrong deserved my negative feelings. Now something happened. I can't tell exactly what but I just woke up this morning with this urge of letting go. Like I can't identify myself with those memories anymore. Like somebody else was relating me all that bed feelings and I was the once who gave the advice of letting go. Strange things can occur all of a sudden
Anyways, I'm happy about it and just wanted to share.
-------------------- All this time I've loved you And never known your face All this time I've missed you And searched this human race Here is true peace Here my heart knows calm Safe in your soul Bathed in your sighs
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mr_kite
The Watcher
Registered: 09/16/02
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Loc: shambhala
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I believe that to be truly free and in control of your life you have to be able to forgive, otherwise your emotions are ruling you; however I also think that the human need to grieve sometimes comes first for a period, and I think it has to be like that.
-------------------- let yourself be silently drawn by the stronger pull of what you really love
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ungskabning
Stranger
Registered: 03/14/05
Posts: 7
Loc: Denmark
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Re: Forgiving [Re: mr_kite]
#6818513 - 04/22/07 09:14 AM (16 years, 11 months ago) |
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hello my dears, i just stumbled over something i find interesting. maybe you will ind it interesting too. i believe it is relevant to forgiving..as relevant as anything else, really.
its a link to an e-book i havent yet read. http://www.homoperfectus.net/homo_perfectus.html hope it will be of use and joy for you!
with love.
-------------------- May all beings with whom we are inseperably interconnected, be fulfilled awakened and free. May there be peace in this world and throught the entire universe, and may we together complete the spiritual journey.
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redgreenvines
irregular verb
Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 38,066
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i may get a bad rap for this - I like to simplify issues - forgive me:
the term I really prefer to use is gentleness, and instead of forgiveness I reccommend a practice of being gentle - gentle-ing down. even more so than calming down. It is more generic, and quite dependable.
for instance, when really nervous or irritated - I cannot even conceive of claming down, it is just too huge a job - but gentling down is possible, i.e. the very next thing can be approached more gently, more softly. (the result is a calming one)
simmilarly there are many confused aspects in forgiveness. All the associations - memories, these will not go away (nor should they), you can alternatively practice a kind of self hypnosis and seem to cause memories anaesthetically to submerge, but they remain embedded in your psyche (some are mixed up and non-productive, but all are parts of the story of self that should not be denied).
What I reccommend is engentlment for the cases when forgiveness is petitioned. Gentleness is useful anyway and no history is wiped out. Gentleness is good foundation for what follows. Memories are allowed to persist without taking control or being submerged.
(it is also a great intention when really really stoned)
-------------------- _ 🧠_
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fireworks_god
Sexy.Butt.McDanger
Registered: 03/12/02
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I think that forgiveness, or, as redgreenvines refers to, gentleness (;)), is healthy because the act will release the emotional states that we associate with the act that we feel to forgive. Forgiveness might be an act that brings us back into harmony with the nature of reality.
For example, if someone were to talk about you behind your back, that act is the nature of reality as it unfolded - it happened, and a resistance to forgive the person is sort of a resistance to accepting reality. One could clearly choose how they wish to interact with the person after releasing the emotions regarding the event (forgiveness) - its not like forgiveness means being a sucker.
Of course, I just woke up and my eyes still have trouble focusing, so this may or may not be towards what you were talking about. I'll let you decide that, and I'll go float around some more in some half-aware state.
-------------------- If I should die this very moment I wouldn't fear For I've never known completeness Like being here Wrapped in the warmth of you Loving every breath of you
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DrCamacho89
Mazel Tuff
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Is it safe to say as human beings we should forgive ourselves for not forgiving certain people? Can we come to terms with them successfully without the act of forgiving them? I think the only people we need to forgive are ourselves, for allowing such pain to be entered into our lives from outside sources and come to the realization that we cannot control almost every aspect of our lives, so it is meaningless to remain so angry at those who have "let us down". Their actions were out of our control.
-------------------- "The Highways of Life are Paved with Flat Squirrels who Couldn't Make Up Their Minds"
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OrgoneConclusion
Blue Fish Group
Registered: 04/01/07
Posts: 45,441
Loc: Under the C
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I just want all you back-stabbing, bush-whacking, dry-gulching, conniving, scheming sons-of-bitches to know that I forgive you.
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redgreenvines
irregular verb
Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 38,066
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that's real gentleness with teeth!
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OrgoneConclusion
Blue Fish Group
Registered: 04/01/07
Posts: 45,441
Loc: Under the C
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Huehuecoyotl
Fading Slowly
Registered: 06/13/04
Posts: 10,689
Loc: On the Border
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What is more important than forgiveness of others is the forgiveness of self. If one unconditionally forgives the self the forgiveness of others happens by default. Ultimately if one assumes total responsibility for the self then one drops the blaming of others and accepts them as just following their programming.
-------------------- "A warrior is a hunter. He calculates everything. That's control. Once his calculations are over, he acts. He lets go. That's abandon. A warrior is not a leaf at the mercy of the wind. No one can push him; no one can make him do things against himself or against his better judgment. A warrior is tuned to survive, and he survives in the best of all possible fashions." ― Carlos Castaneda
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Grok
Has Been a Bad Boy
Registered: 12/03/03
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^Agreed
I find that the quickest path to forgiveness is forgetfullness, which comes naturally when you start living in the present moment, knowing that nothing matters, and if necessary smashing the ego to pieces with some allies. Holding resentment a waste of life...look at the fucking middle east.
For getting is for giving.
-------------------- Entropy is increasing. To send me a PM, go to my journal
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blewmeanie
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BlueCoyote
Beyond
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I never forgive somebody until I see the others insight. To protect me from my grudge, I interact with those only in an indifferent way, at max. And I see no cause to forgive me, that I don't forgive. I won't let time play 'their' game. But that's me.
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MushroomTrip
Dr. Teasy Thighs
Registered: 12/02/05
Posts: 14,794
Loc: red panda village
Last seen: 3 years, 25 days
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Thank you for your replies .
I like the term that redgreenvines used, sounds like engentlment is a part of forgiving, as well as a part of forgiving ourselves is another part but I also feel like letting go is the last step to forgiving, like finally accepting that this is the way things happened and that it's best to focus on new the new things in our life.
FWG, what you said make perfect sense even if just woken up when you wrote that, and it all makes more sense to me now since last night I had an awesome trip and came to new realizations
-------------------- All this time I've loved you And never known your face All this time I've missed you And searched this human race Here is true peace Here my heart knows calm Safe in your soul Bathed in your sighs
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Silversoul
Rhizome
Registered: 01/01/05
Posts: 23,576
Loc: The Barricades
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I like to think that forgiveness is the highest virtue, but that would simply be stroking my ego, as I've always been a very forgiving person, and it's always come easy to me. The highest virtue one can attain is the one that is the greatest challenge for them. So for me, it would be something along the lines of courage or patience.
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redgreenvines
irregular verb
Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 38,066
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I don't have a different way of playing cards than playing life; I mean I accept the hand I am dealt in life the same way as i accept the hand that shows up while playing cards.
that means I am too emotional to play poker effectively, but I see what is happenning when it has already happenned so it is a fair bit realistic in life.
this accepting of what has already happenned relates to FWG's post above.
not so much forgiving what has happenned, but letting it be what it is without trying to edit it.
which may also relate to what mushroomtrip is saying
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Lion
Decadent Flower Magnate
Registered: 09/20/05
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Quote:
So for me, it would be something along the lines of courage or patience.
Me too, bro.
My particular challenge with patience is that I have a voracious desire to teach others, and a lot of trouble cooling myself down enough to actually listen and learn. My ego does not like to be reminded that it is not a guru.
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OrgoneConclusion
Blue Fish Group
Registered: 04/01/07
Posts: 45,441
Loc: Under the C
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Re: Forgiving [Re: Lion]
#6825014 - 04/23/07 09:19 PM (16 years, 11 months ago) |
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I have trained my ego to realize that it is, in fact, a guru.
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fireworks_god
Sexy.Butt.McDanger
Registered: 03/12/02
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Quote:
OrgoneConclusion said: I have trained my ego to realize that it is, in fact, a guru.
Yes, but what area does this guru specialize in? Are you the guru of ganja, or, in other words, the swami of sativa?
-------------------- If I should die this very moment I wouldn't fear For I've never known completeness Like being here Wrapped in the warmth of you Loving every breath of you
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OrgoneConclusion
Blue Fish Group
Registered: 04/01/07
Posts: 45,441
Loc: Under the C
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SOS all the way, baby. Sativa is the only way to fly.
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