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Cracka_X
Spiritual Dirt Worshipper
Registered: 01/25/03
Posts: 8,808
Loc: Swamp
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TRUE ETERNAL SALVAGE LIES WITHIN...
#6755721 - 04/06/07 09:26 PM (16 years, 11 months ago) |
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PASTAFARIANISM!!!
TO HELL WITH ALL THESE "CRAZY" RELIGIONS!! Pastafarianism is the direction we should all go!!!
This is how life really started..
All evidence for evolution was planted by the Flying Spaghetti Monster. The FSM tests Pastafarians' faith by making things look older than they are (q.v. Omphalos). "For example, a scientist may perform a carbon-dating process on an artifact. He finds that approximately 75% of the Carbon-14 has decayed by electron emission to Nitrogen-14, and infers that this artifact is approximately 10,000 years old, as the half-life of Carbon-14 appears to be 5,730 years. But what our scientist does not realize is that every time he makes a measurement, the Flying Spaghetti Monster is there changing the results with His Noodly Appendage. We have numerous texts that describe in detail how that can be possible and the reasons why He does this. He is of course invisible and can pass through normal matter with ease."
The Pastafarian belief of heaven stresses these two points: (1) it has beer volcanos as far as the eye can see, and (2) it has a stripper factory." The religious text of the Pastafarian religion is called the Loose Canon, which may be considered to be a play on loose cannon and the biblical canon. In place of the ten commandments, it contains eight "I'd Really Rather You Didn'ts", with a looser moral code.
RAmen" is the official conclusion to prayers, certain sections of The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, and so on, and is a portmanteau of the Semitic term "Amen" (used in Judaism, Christianity, and Islam) and Ramen, a noodle. While it is typically spelled with both a capital "R" and "A", it is also acceptable to spell it with only a capital R.
The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is the Pastafarian equivalent of the Bible. It parodies biblical figures with characters such as Captain Mosey, a pirate and the FSM equivalent of Moses. The Gospel contains The Eight "I'd Really Rather You Didn'ts", parodying the Ten Commandments. It also provides information on how to convert non-"Pastafarians" and explains many of the religions beliefs (for example, the opinion that the lack of pirates caused global warming).
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flying_Spaghetti_Monster
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SneezingPenis
ACHOOOOOOOOO!!!!!111!
Registered: 01/15/05
Posts: 15,427
Last seen: 6 years, 10 months
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Re: TRUE ETERNAL SALVAGE LIES WITHIN... [Re: Cracka_X]
#6755791 - 04/06/07 09:47 PM (16 years, 11 months ago) |
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Blashphemer!!!
Pastafarianism is pure evil. Atkinsism is the only proper way to live ones life.
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FreeUrThoughts
Mindful Mantis
Registered: 03/14/07
Posts: 32
Last seen: 16 years, 8 months
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Re: TRUE ETERNAL SALVAGE LIES WITHIN... [Re: SneezingPenis]
#6755870 - 04/06/07 10:09 PM (16 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
psilocyberin said: Blashphemer!!!
Pastafarianism is pure evil. Atkinsism is the only proper way to live ones life.
Here-here! I full-heartedly agree!
BB, Free Ur Thoughts
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redgreenvines
irregular verb
Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 38,066
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hi fibre cereal products are my salvation. [Re: FreeUrThoughts]
#6756757 - 04/07/07 03:22 AM (16 years, 11 months ago) |
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I always believed in spaghetti in the pasta and the fyootcha too. the real meat of it is in the present, however - & constantly unravelling.
it works for me slurp and ramen
-------------------- _ 🧠 _
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kaiowas
lest we baguette
Registered: 07/14/03
Posts: 5,501
Loc: oz
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Re: TRUE ETERNAL SALVAGE LIES WITHIN... [Re: Cracka_X]
#6756785 - 04/07/07 03:39 AM (16 years, 11 months ago) |
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while I found the post amusing, there's really no philosophical content for any discussion. unless you can gear up some discussion based literature, I'm going to move it...sorry I'm not trying to be a dick here
though, I'll tell you what, I'll have you decide where I should put the thread if you can't provide some debate
ps
beer volcanoes rule!!!
-------------------- Annnnnnd I had a light saber and my friend was there and I said "you look like an indian" and he said "you look like satan" and he found a stick and a rock and he named the rock ooga booga and he named the stick Stick and we both thought that was pretty funny. We got eaten alive by mosquitos but didn't notice til the next day. I stepped on some glass while wading in the swamp and cut my foot open, didn't bother me til the next day either....yeah it was a good time, ended the night by buying some liquor for minors and drinking nips and going to he diner and eating chicken fingers, and then I went home and went to bed.
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MushroomTrip
Dr. Teasy Thighs
Registered: 12/02/05
Posts: 14,794
Loc: red panda village
Last seen: 3 years, 25 days
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Re: TRUE ETERNAL SALVAGE LIES WITHIN... [Re: kaiowas]
#6756813 - 04/07/07 03:58 AM (16 years, 11 months ago) |
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-------------------- All this time I've loved you And never known your face All this time I've missed you And searched this human race Here is true peace Here my heart knows calm Safe in your soul Bathed in your sighs
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Mokshaguy390
Stranger
Registered: 02/24/07
Posts: 154
Last seen: 15 years, 5 months
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Re: TRUE ETERNAL SALVAGE LIES WITHIN... [Re: MushroomTrip]
#6759510 - 04/07/07 10:33 PM (16 years, 11 months ago) |
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I was saved three years ago. I have given my all to the Great Noodley One and have never looked back.
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Cracka_X
Spiritual Dirt Worshipper
Registered: 01/25/03
Posts: 8,808
Loc: Swamp
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Re: TRUE ETERNAL SALVAGE LIES WITHIN... [Re: kaiowas]
#6760167 - 04/08/07 04:32 AM (16 years, 11 months ago) |
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I'm just a messenger of the Flying Spaghetti Monster spreading the truth! I, here before you presenting the word of Flying Spaghetti Monster is all a matter of what Flying Spaghetti Monster intended. If you don't believe, then I guess there's gonna be one less person I can share the beer volcanoes and copious amounts of strippers with. Hell surely won't have that!
You gotta give up your lousy ways and follow Flying Spaghetti Monster, brah!
Flying Spaghetti Monster Bless the USA!
-------------------- The best way to live is to be like water For water benefits all things and goes against none of them It provides for all people and even cleanses those places a man is loath to go In this way it is just like Tao ~Daodejing
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Gomp
¡(Bound to·(O))be free!
Registered: 09/11/04
Posts: 10,888
Loc: I re·side [primarily] in...
Last seen: 1 year, 28 days
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Re: TRUE ETERNAL SALVAGE LIES WITHIN... [Re: Cracka_X]
#6764475 - 04/09/07 09:25 AM (16 years, 11 months ago) |
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Funny how easy it is...
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