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OfflineXanthas
Blaspheme,blaspheyou, Blaspheverybody

Registered: 11/19/05
Posts: 267
Last seen: 13 years, 11 months
Ode to Caffeine
    #6484809 - 01/22/07 08:55 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

How much I owe to you, my neuromuscular psychostimulant.
With a long-term regime, on large-ish doses, a deleriant.
Your intensely bitter flavor adds some character to your high,
Sans all trace of tolerance, just 2-centi-mgs* lets me fly.

You're snortable, injectable, quite likely very smokable
If found in modern times, you'd probably be bannable

You tweak my flow of dopamine, and cortisol, theophylline
You play my heart, you tug my lungs, and harken days of Benzadrine

In coffee, tea, guarana plants, you're known throughout the world
You've touched most every culture, gulped from silver, glass, and gourd
You're a devil and an angel, wondrous gift and wicked curse
But I'm always glad to have you, for better or for worse.

*mgs is pronounced "migs".


--------------------
If you don't ask the question, you always get it wrong.


Edited by Xanthas (01/23/07 01:27 AM)


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Offlinestefan
work in progress

Registered: 04/11/01
Posts: 8,932
Loc: The Netherlands
Last seen: 6 months, 23 days
Re: Ode to Caffeine [Re: Xanthas]
    #6484867 - 01/22/07 09:41 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

:thumbup:


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Invisibletakk
Stranger
Male
Registered: 02/22/06
Posts: 736
Re: Ode to Caffeine [Re: stefan]
    #6484926 - 01/22/07 10:11 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

Very cool! :grin:
I only wish caffiene offered more than it does :stoned:
On a similar topic, I also wrote a short piece of literature about it not that long ago:

I wouldn't mind some coffee by Anarchyz0r

I stared at my coffee cup and took a sip. There was a sound of helicopters hovering nearby outside. I neglected to pay heed to the distraction.

Out of the blue, two mexican elephants stormed in through the wall to my left. I could clearly tell that they were mexican by the distinct marking painted on their sides, "Property of the Que Pasa Zoo, Mexico". The elephants proceeded to make elephant-like noises whilst I trodded towards the toilet to empty my bladder.

Later that day, a monk from the religeous district was standing on my lawn, clasping a Qu’ran whilst screaming and badgering a little girl. "THEY WEREN'T FOR YOU!" he yelled. Police shortly showed up and escorted the monk to the ends of nightsticks. The sound was so deafening I ended up turning on the washing machine to drown out the noise . I tried to take another swig of coffee from my expired cup; as a result, my legs were forced to walk back into the kitchen to replenish my reserves.

As I plunged another batch, a tissue-paper-white bird flew into my window making a loud thud, a clunking noise, and a startled "SCwaarRK!". I gasped and filled my cup with coffee yet again.

Nearby my attention, a wheel had exploded into a million shards on the street infront of my lawn. At that point I noticed that time had started to drift backwards, but then I realised it was just the radio which caused me to think that so I turned it off.

And then there was darkness, and a voice told me all would be well

When the sun came up again in the morning I decided to go to the shops to get more coffee beans becuase I had run out.


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OfflineXanthas
Blaspheme,blaspheyou, Blaspheverybody

Registered: 11/19/05
Posts: 267
Last seen: 13 years, 11 months
Re: Ode to Caffeine [Re: takk]
    #6484935 - 01/22/07 10:15 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

Wonderful bit of surreal insanity. Reminds me of http://youtube.com/watch?v=a5TJApnJ8X8


--------------------
If you don't ask the question, you always get it wrong.


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Invisibletakk
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Registered: 02/22/06
Posts: 736
Re: Ode to Caffeine [Re: Xanthas]
    #6484953 - 01/22/07 10:21 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

gotta love that vid :laugh:


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OfflineXanthas
Blaspheme,blaspheyou, Blaspheverybody

Registered: 11/19/05
Posts: 267
Last seen: 13 years, 11 months
Re: Ode to Caffeine [Re: takk]
    #6484960 - 01/22/07 10:25 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

It freaks me the hell out. The somewhat "off" quality of the sound, and especially the screaming.

I like it, and am glad to have watched it, but have no desire to watch it again.

Also, my bit of work is inspired quite a bit by Data's "Ode to Spot" if that wasn't obvious (or you've not seen that episode of Star Trek).


--------------------
If you don't ask the question, you always get it wrong.


Edited by Xanthas (01/22/07 10:31 AM)


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OfflineFrosty_Storm
Wandered off inwonderland
Male

Registered: 01/20/07
Posts: 353
Loc: Pennsylvania
Last seen: 11 years, 14 days
Re: Ode to Caffeine [Re: Xanthas]
    #6488586 - 01/23/07 05:16 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

As a LAN goer, and late night studier, I thank thee for this ode! :thumbup:


--------------------
Shrowded in an angelic white veil of darkness
~Frosty Storm~


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OfflineWysefool
I AM SKELETON JELLY
Male User Gallery
Registered: 12/26/02
Posts: 6,641
Last seen: 5 months, 16 days
Re: Ode to Caffeine [Re: Xanthas]
    #6488890 - 01/23/07 10:55 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

I just poured my morning cup of coffee and I'll probably have 2 more before the morning is over. I love coffee but I wish it was a lot more powerful, I have too much experience with other things for it to really do the trick. I think I'll have to try ordering some of that coca tea soon.


--------------------
GET MAD SWAG MONEY BIG PIMPIN


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Invisibleirascible_raunch
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Registered: 10/18/05
Posts: 1,111
Re: Ode to Caffeine [Re: Wysefool]
    #6490114 - 01/23/07 07:21 PM (14 years, 3 months ago)

I imagine you already load the filter up with (at least) 3 extra scoops as it is, so my other tip to you is to be sure to buy dark roast coffee (or if you can find it, extra or double dark roast). It makes a tremendous difference compared to medium or medium-dark. Also, rather than being a late-night studier, I tend to be an early early-morning studier -- as in, waking up at 3:30 or 4:00 AM to finish papers or homework or reading that's due at the start of my 8:00 AM class.


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OfflineXanthas
Blaspheme,blaspheyou, Blaspheverybody

Registered: 11/19/05
Posts: 267
Last seen: 13 years, 11 months
Re: Ode to Caffeine [Re: Wysefool]
    #6490523 - 01/23/07 09:45 PM (14 years, 3 months ago)

Caffeine pills, I have found, are far, far superior to coffee in virtually any form.

If you can tolerate it, I suppose, one might well take to snorting pure caffeine powder.


--------------------
If you don't ask the question, you always get it wrong.


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Invisiblesublimesanchita
CascadingEntropy
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Registered: 01/06/05
Posts: 165
Loc: jerz
Re: Ode to Caffeine [Re: Xanthas]
    #6490897 - 01/23/07 11:52 PM (14 years, 3 months ago)

Anyone want some gourmet coffee?..Boca Java.. its so yummy and I got loads..hehe:)


--------------------


When the truth is found to be lies, and all the joy within you dies.


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OfflineApadravya
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Registered: 09/06/05
Posts: 33
Last seen: 12 years, 1 month
Re: Ode to Caffeine [Re: Xanthas]
    #6495333 - 01/25/07 11:02 AM (14 years, 3 months ago)

Now you got me thinking... I wonder if you could IV it! :laugh:


--------------------
It's always funny until someone gets hurt. Then it's just hilarious.


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Invisibletakk
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Registered: 02/22/06
Posts: 736
Re: Ode to Caffeine [Re: Apadravya]
    #6496880 - 01/25/07 08:14 PM (14 years, 3 months ago)

*heart explosion*


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Offlineroguebot
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Registered: 04/01/06
Posts: 13
Last seen: 3 months, 10 days
Re: Ode to Caffeine [Re: Xanthas]
    #6497067 - 01/25/07 08:51 PM (14 years, 3 months ago)

It's a bit too technical, but you did that on purpose :smile:

How does coffee affect cortisol?


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OfflineXanthas
Blaspheme,blaspheyou, Blaspheverybody

Registered: 11/19/05
Posts: 267
Last seen: 13 years, 11 months
Re: Ode to Caffeine [Re: roguebot]
    #6497325 - 01/25/07 09:59 PM (14 years, 3 months ago)

Caffeine elevates cortisol levels.


--------------------
If you don't ask the question, you always get it wrong.


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