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OfflinecHeMiCaLbLuE
member
Registered: 04/07/02
Posts: 158
Last seen: 21 years, 10 months
who is cHeMiCaLbLuE?
    #618434 - 04/25/02 01:20 PM (21 years, 11 months ago)

everyday it is getting stronger, my visuals are starting to change, my old perceptions changing. I awoke half-way this morning to find my visuals so intense i didn't know where i was. Pixelation, i was so fucking confused what was going on, everything looked as if it were breaking down, but there were new kinds of depth being put into place or i was seeing something i never have before, i can't describe it because i can't put it into words. if you get that kind of pixelation on mush, you know kinda what i mean, It almost looks like when you sit real close to the t.v. screen. I awoke this morning with a huge headache, all this is really becoming too much to handle. When i got up until know i keep thinking everything is a dream, i just have to wake up again, the energy rush right now feels electric, like when you put your tongue on a battery, but i feel it in my chest and throat. i can still see the pixelation now but not nearly as intense.

Anyways, who is cHeMiCaLbLuE?

cHeMiCaLbLuE is not from here for he is not like you, he thinks he has to go home, he thinks he does not belong here, but he doesn't know how to get there. He stares up at the sky and wonders when he see's the crystal balls falling from the sky and things breathing. He knows he never saw this stuff before, he thinks mybe he was not paying attention before but then he realizes how stupid and implausable that seems. He wonders if this is destiny or if he has completely created all this in his mind which still is trippy for it goes completely against society's paradigm structure. He thinks life is kinda starting to feel like the matrix, but he thinks the matrix was wrong in the sense that there was no way they could percieve what happens after Neo took the pill, it was only a reproduction of the writers mind, a projection. cHeMiCaL bLuE thinks he has to kill himself to finally wake up, but he probably won't do that for he is having too much fun being crazy. he laughs in the face of death as well as the face of mankind for he knows that none of it is real anymore, he knows there is no jesus and he knows the aliens are coming with the truth, he knows he cannot die, he knows he is even more powerful than he thinks himself to be and he also knows that each one of you are too, he loves you but he is not sure that love is real. cHeMiCaLbLuE is going to a huge fuckin rave this weekend and is gonna get fucked up, let the x destroy.



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insanity with a plan, a plan to stop exercising truth as compared to breathing thin air, but to experience truth as all there is to experience, for what do i not already have that exsists? All i can do is enjoy the ride.

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OfflineDiMeNSioN
journeyman
Registered: 01/30/02
Posts: 99
Last seen: 18 years, 2 months
Re: who is cHeMiCaLbLuE? [Re: cHeMiCaLbLuE]
    #618440 - 04/25/02 01:32 PM (21 years, 11 months ago)

!

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InvisibleRevelation

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Registered: 08/04/01
Posts: 6,135
Loc: heart cave
Re: who is cHeMiCaLbLuE? [Re: cHeMiCaLbLuE]
    #618463 - 04/25/02 01:53 PM (21 years, 11 months ago)

I exist (this is all I know).
Whether you exist remains to be seen.
Our personal realities are very different.
We can't relate to each other.
Or know each other.

I just realized that I don't even know the people I live with, at least not nearly as well as I know myself. It's a lonely existence at times.


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Anonymous

Re: who is cHeMiCaLbLuE? [Re: cHeMiCaLbLuE]
    #618487 - 04/25/02 02:28 PM (21 years, 11 months ago)

Maybe, just maybe, cHeMiCaLbLuE should lay off the psychedelics for a while before his mind looses all cohesion. Delay tampering with your psyche any more until you're able to integrate the most recent experiences and changes.

This is not intended to be a flame, just some cautionary advice. You seem to be travelling on a very slippery slope.

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OfflineMentalHygene
otherworldly

Registered: 01/14/02
Posts: 192
Loc: Somewhere...Under the rai...
Last seen: 20 years, 2 months
Re: who is cHeMiCaLbLuE? [Re: ]
    #618548 - 04/25/02 03:48 PM (21 years, 11 months ago)

I agree, take it easy on the drugs for a while. Take some time to get to know yourself. Enjoy your time here because, after all you chose this existance. Your time will be up soon enough. You dont have to dive head first into the pool of crazyness to be different. Most of all have fun and take it slow! I hope you figure everything out, and I mean that with 100% sincerity.


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"WHATS THE USE OF AUTONOMY WHEN A BUTTON DOES IT ALL?"

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OfflineAdamist
ℚṲℰϟ✞ЇѺℵ ℛ∃Åʟḯ†У
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Registered: 11/23/01
Posts: 10,211
Loc: Bloomington, IN
Last seen: 9 years, 29 days
Re: who is cHeMiCaLbLuE? [Re: cHeMiCaLbLuE]
    #619968 - 04/26/02 10:51 PM (21 years, 11 months ago)

Yes I know what you mean about waking up to pixelated hallucination type visuals... It happens to me almost every morning now. I wake up to take a piss and I close my eyes and see a huge spiral or wheel or sometimes multiples of these. But always things spinning.. The other morning it was flowers blooming and spinning, it was so colorful it made me dizzy and I had to sit down. I feel like this dimension is overlapping another and I can watch this happen pretty much anytime. Are the dimensions shifting or is it just my perceptions? Or both? :wink: 


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:heartpump: { { { ṧ◎ηḯ¢ αʟ¢ℌ℮мƴ } } } :heartpump:

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OfflineCatalysis
EtherealEngineer

Registered: 04/23/02
Posts: 1,742
Last seen: 15 years, 8 months
Re: who is cHeMiCaLbLuE? [Re: Adamist]
    #619997 - 04/26/02 11:19 PM (21 years, 11 months ago)

LOL, its kind of funny, but i dont even have to close my eyes for this any more. If i look at a plain white wall i see just about everything except for the wall. Usually it is red and blue tv-screen type "static". It often moves and flows and it will form spirals and wheel type structures if i so desire. Personally, i think it is foolhearty to assume that this wierd effect is caused by aliens or dimensions but that is my own opinion and i think that it is very cool that you guys can also "see" this and that you are experimenting with it.

P.S. this occurs when im totally sober, 24/7 (i have done a lot of psychedelics if that matters, which im sure it does)...


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:egyptian:

Edited by Catalysis (04/26/02 11:23 PM)

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OfflinecHeMiCaLbLuE
member
Registered: 04/07/02
Posts: 158
Last seen: 21 years, 10 months
Re: who is cHeMiCaLbLuE? [Re: Catalysis]
    #620016 - 04/26/02 11:31 PM (21 years, 11 months ago)

you all have to understand this, i'm not who you think i am and neither are you. You have to understand that this world means nothing and that where we are going means everything. I tried to tell my friend christy this, she thinks she is weird, and she got scared, and thats just it, being scared is not real. I summon demons and they do not show themselves, they are an illusion just as much as you and i, man i'm so high right now, and all i'm doing is drinking beer, man life is the shit, i love you all. writing is fun although it is meaningless, so i say let go of your beliefs for they only serve to keep you in this illusion, fuckin let it all go and have fun, that's what it is all about.


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insanity with a plan, a plan to stop exercising truth as compared to breathing thin air, but to experience truth as all there is to experience, for what do i not already have that exsists? All i can do is enjoy the ride.

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OfflinecHeMiCaLbLuE
member
Registered: 04/07/02
Posts: 158
Last seen: 21 years, 10 months
Re: who is cHeMiCaLbLuE? [Re: Catalysis]
    #620020 - 04/26/02 11:34 PM (21 years, 11 months ago)

yes catalyis is you are very right for i see the same thing, love is the answer, let the fools kill themselves while i get high.


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insanity with a plan, a plan to stop exercising truth as compared to breathing thin air, but to experience truth as all there is to experience, for what do i not already have that exsists? All i can do is enjoy the ride.

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Anonymous

Re: who is cHeMiCaLbLuE? [Re: Adamist]
    #620028 - 04/26/02 11:43 PM (21 years, 11 months ago)

I wake up to take a piss and I close my eyes and see a huge spiral or wheel or sometimes multiples of these. But always things spinning.. The other morning it was flowers blooming and spinning, it was so colorful it made me dizzy and I had to sit down.
I think that's caused by low blood pressure when you first arise from sleep. It used to happen to me a lot when I didn't get enough sleep and lived a little harder.

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OfflineDanimal
journeyman
Registered: 04/12/02
Posts: 76
Last seen: 21 years, 3 months
Re: who is cHeMiCaLbLuE? [Re: ]
    #620031 - 04/26/02 11:48 PM (21 years, 11 months ago)

Who is chemicalblue?

Sort of reminds me of syd barett right before he went really insane and off the deep end. I haven't known you(chem) or anyone on this board for a while but from what I've read I would take other people's advice and perhaps lay off the drugs for a bit. Not trying to preach, just looking out for your health.

Peace folks.

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OfflineJPAtanat
member
Registered: 04/17/02
Posts: 101
Last seen: 21 years, 5 months
Re: who is cHeMiCaLbLuE? [Re: ]
    #620032 - 04/26/02 11:48 PM (21 years, 11 months ago)

not necesarily. I get it whenever I fixate on anything, at anytime. Does anyone else get that. It happens especially when im meditating, because my vision is fixated, and not focused on an object and nothing will keep still. Everything is always shifting and swirling sometimes and moving. ya know what im sayin'?


Peace.

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OfflineJPAtanat
member
Registered: 04/17/02
Posts: 101
Last seen: 21 years, 5 months
Re: who is cHeMiCaLbLuE? [Re: Danimal]
    #620040 - 04/27/02 12:04 AM (21 years, 11 months ago)

reminded me of a poem by rumi:

All day I think about it, then at night I say it.
Where did I come from and what am I supposed to be doing?
I have no idea.
My soul is from elsewhere, I'm sure of that,
and I intend to end up there.

This drunkenness began in some other tavern.
When I get back around to that place
I'll be completely sober, meanwhile,
I'm like a bird from another continent, sitting in this aviary.
The day is coming when I fly off,
but who is now in my ear, who hears my voice?
Who says words with my mouth?

Who looks out with my eyes? What is the soul?
I cannot stop asking.
If I could taste just one sip of the answer,
I could break out of this prison for drunks.
I didn't come here of my own accord, and I can't leave that way.
Whoever brought me here will have to take me back.

This poetry. I never know what I'm going to say.
I don't plan it.
Whenever I'm outside the saying of it,
I get very quiet and rarely speak at all.

-Rumi.

I'm sure many of you are familiar with this poem, but I post it here for the benefit of those who are not.

And chemblue, i would agree with others... perhaps not doing so many drugs is better, but then, you must live your own life....


Peace Earthlings.

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OfflinecHeMiCaLbLuE
member
Registered: 04/07/02
Posts: 158
Last seen: 21 years, 10 months
Re: who is cHeMiCaLbLuE? [Re: JPAtanat]
    #620046 - 04/27/02 12:14 AM (21 years, 11 months ago)

yes you know nothing , just have fun, for what else do you know is right, i can't even see and i've only had four beer.


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insanity with a plan, a plan to stop exercising truth as compared to breathing thin air, but to experience truth as all there is to experience, for what do i not already have that exsists? All i can do is enjoy the ride.

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OfflinecHeMiCaLbLuE
member
Registered: 04/07/02
Posts: 158
Last seen: 21 years, 10 months
Re: who is cHeMiCaLbLuE? [Re: cHeMiCaLbLuE]
    #620055 - 04/27/02 12:20 AM (21 years, 11 months ago)

can you feel the love, i sure as hell can, i don''teven know what to say anymore, but meditation is key. I don't car for if i did i would be limited. mybe those who can't se this shit should wake up and smell the roses. last weekend wa the shit, me and my friend sarah just sat around and listened to music and got drunk and had so much fun, she said she had never had so much fun in her life casue when anyone is me there is no judging or reputation, there is only fun, cause thats all i want, i don't care who you are for we are all the same.


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insanity with a plan, a plan to stop exercising truth as compared to breathing thin air, but to experience truth as all there is to experience, for what do i not already have that exsists? All i can do is enjoy the ride.

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OfflineJustFootsteps
newbie
Registered: 02/10/01
Posts: 31
Loc: a hill
Last seen: 21 years, 8 months
Re: who is cHeMiCaLbLuE? [Re: cHeMiCaLbLuE]
    #620169 - 04/27/02 04:06 AM (21 years, 11 months ago)

hey, very cool, always nice to learn that other people experience some of the same stuff or similar as in my Real Experience.

I've had this sort of field of sparkling light over my vision since I was ten years old. it's pixellated but also wavy, very colorful but always primarily sunshine yellow... these days its quite pronounced and beautiful. when i had my first good experience on psychs, dropped into the Beat, saw the Real, etc. I realized that this field was my third eye/sixth sense/ real self trying to wake me up, remind me... keeping an 'eye on the prize' so to speak. over time, as my belief strengthened, it has gotten much easier; i can sink into the real with ten minutes' meditation, but the goofy dance of the spirit world stays in view regardless and goes absolutely mad for me if i grant it an audience on my closed eyelids. all you have to give Great Spirit is your belief, and it will give you the world, everything you need, a playpen and playmates and toys beyond your imagining.

i hope, among other things, that the sparkles never stop dancing.

does anyone else here read Tom Robbins' novels?


--------------------
in peace,
just footsteps
http://www.whyvegan.org

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OfflineAdamist
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Registered: 11/23/01
Posts: 10,211
Loc: Bloomington, IN
Last seen: 9 years, 29 days
Re: who is cHeMiCaLbLuE? [Re: JPAtanat]
    #620620 - 04/27/02 04:51 PM (21 years, 11 months ago)

In reply to:

not necesarily. I get it whenever I fixate on anything, at anytime. Does anyone else get that. It happens especially when im meditating, because my vision is fixated, and not focused on an object and nothing will keep still. Everything is always shifting and swirling sometimes and moving. ya know what im sayin'?



yes!



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:heartpump: { { { ṧ◎ηḯ¢ αʟ¢ℌ℮мƴ } } } :heartpump:

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OfflineAdamist
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Registered: 11/23/01
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Re: who is cHeMiCaLbLuE? [Re: JPAtanat]
    #620622 - 04/27/02 04:53 PM (21 years, 11 months ago)

"Whoever brought me here will have to take me back."

I'm working on that... :smile:



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:heartpump: { { { ṧ◎ηḯ¢ αʟ¢ℌ℮мƴ } } } :heartpump:

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InvisibleFloydian
veteran
Registered: 05/13/00
Posts: 1,022
Re: who is cHeMiCaLbLuE? [Re: cHeMiCaLbLuE]
    #620679 - 04/27/02 06:53 PM (21 years, 11 months ago)

"you all have to understand this, i'm not who you think i am and neither are you. You have to understand that this world means nothing and that where we are going means everything."

No we don't. You are either delusional or making really really lame attempts at being symbolic/metaphorical.

This jibberish means nothing, You've discovered nothing, and all your efforts will be in vain. You are simply getting lost in your own psyche. Get over it and stop trying so damn hard.


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Don't squeeze the pancake batter

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OfflineLearyfanS
It's the psychedelic movement!
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Re: who is cHeMiCaLbLuE? [Re: Floydian]
    #620693 - 04/27/02 07:06 PM (21 years, 11 months ago)

Why are you being so harsh on the guy Floydian?

Chill out



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