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Registered: 03/30/01
Posts: 311
Loc: MD, USA
Last seen: 8 years, 7 months
I just don't understand some people...
    #600957 - 04/07/02 01:09 AM (16 years, 6 months ago)

Well, I really need to bitch about some of the people who live in my dad's neighborhood, and about my dad, I guess, so here's what happened today...

My dad lives in a townhouse with a small, undeveloped wooded area behind it, in the middle of the row of townhouses, he trades some of his skills as a certified arborist for some of the mortgage. He's usually a real arse-hole(getting drunk, calling mom's house eight times, threatening physical violence, being really anal about stuff that really dosen't matter, ignoring most of the stuff that does, being very vocal, bellidgerent, spiteful, and underhanded if he dislikes something or someone(like my mom, my grandma, people my mom just happens to know, my mom's yard(we had a great tree that we think he killed while we were away, he also stole some tools that were in the shed, as well as other stuff) etc.)). Well, he needed to get some yardwork done and, I being the only person who could help him who was at the house (There was my brother too, but he's seven), I helped him take out two shrubs, trim four of the public area pine trees, tie all the cut-off bits into bundles, and carry the bundles to where my dad said was the edge of the woods. I thought 'the edge of the woods' was pretty sculpted looking(like someone planted one of those wild flowers patches twenty feet by twenty feet, in a curve to soften the edge of the woods) for the edge of the woods, and said so. My dad assured me that no one would mind, and the stuff would be out of there by Wednesday, and so I carried some 100-150lbs. of cut-up and bundled pine and shrubs to the 'edge of the woods'. While I carried the bundles (across the grass, because using the sidewalk would mean more walking), a false looking woman (rather aged, uses makeup to hide it, but not well enough.) who was my dad's neighbor, popped out of her door and told me to 'stay off her property', the property being a 30'X30', unfenced, grassy yard with no flowerbeds to speak of. I had no problem with this, and got off the property as soon as I could, and not cross over the boundary of what was 'public' and what was 'hers' (the crosswalk)(I secretly thought; How stupid! As if she owned the earth there. As if I were harming the earth by walking across it! and then that one song about the signs popped into my head, you know 'sign says... long-haired freaky people... need not apply...'). My uncle Bob (who lives with my dad, and is usually a pretty cool, nonviolent guy), who had just come out for a cigarette, said 'If you have something to say to the kids, you talk to either me or Mike(my dad)', as if I were Incapable of speaking reasonably with this woman just because I haven't reached the age of majority(I'm sixteen)! She said that she was speaking to Uncle Bob, although she was looking directly at me. He then proceded to tell me ' just keep going while I speak with her', I complied with this, (Uncle Bob's never been ticked off with me, but I was fine with just doing the task at hand at that moment, and getting it over with). When I came back, Bob walked up to me as I started to get the next bundle of shrub parts tied, and said in a suprised tone, 'She called me white trash!'( while thinking about it, I suppose my dad's family does give that impression, Bob has a beat-up pick-up truck, my dad can't control his temper, and seems a bit dumb when talking). I attempted to ascertain why the words "White Trash" had suprised and angered him so, and he said, 'You're too young to understand, she had NO RIGHT to call me white trash!' (I thought, it's just a name, I pointed that out and asked him what his mother told him about name-calling, it didn't do any good 'You're too young to understand').

Well, I finished that job, and since I hadn't eaten anything all day(side-effect of speed) , and was shaking from low blood sugar I set about mixing peanut butter, cheerios, and honey. No sooner had I mixed that and gotten enough into me to stop the shaking while I was composing an E-Mail to an online author who writes Yiffy fur stories (umm... anthromorphic sex... don't ask.) than I heard a heated argument escalate to yelling outside (the loudest yell came, not surprisingly, from my father, I later learned that the yell coincided with him slamming down the only grass rake we have buisness end first, breaking it).

Leaving the E-Mail unfinished and unsent, I ran down the steps and out the door, pausing just long enough to grab my jacket.

Outside, I found that the neighbor on the other side, Greg, (a very muscular man who was referred to as a 'failure on steroids', but not by me, I thought he was pretty cool before he was involved in this little scene, now I'm undecided)whose wife was evidently friends with the woman who told me not to go on her property, was trying to goad my Uncle into a fight (all things considered, in a fair fight, my uncle would have been a smear on the sidewalk). I burst right inbetween
Bob and Greg, without shoes, and said 'Just calm down, all of you!'.

Greg continued to tell my uncle how he would 'drop him', and I told him to peace out, he said 'just a little bit of receration' and backed up into a boxer's stance, swinging punches at the air. Bob told me that someone had called the Police, I don't think I believed that anyone would call the police on something this minor. Luckily, I don't get paranoid all too easy on anything (the speed I took was time-release Dexidrine, taken right after breakfast, with some coffee. I took it to help get me through the yardwork(which wasn't as tough as I had thought it would be), I was still high as a kite), and I was able to hold onto my sanity.

After my initial assault on the argument, the others who live on that block took heart and started coming in with thier own bits of advice, helpful and unhelpful, both. There was Kelly, who is over twenty-one and lives with her father... She chimed in with 'Some people must have no lives, well... they must, to get upset over shrubs in someone else's yard.' (the owner of the closest house to the place where dad told me to dump the stuff was out, and that section of grass belonged to her, the stuff would have been gone by Wednesday, pickup day for the garbadge). They made rather rude comments about her living with her father. After she went back inside, her father came out and told them that 'You had NO RIGHT to insult my daughter!' They informed him that his daughter could speak for herself, and he left, looking rather annoyed.

My brother's friend's mom rushed up to them to say 'Is it really that big of a deal?! And in front of the children! You should be ashamed! etc. etc.' She left after about thirty seconds of this to bring the children who had been playing nearby inside her house.

I remained there until the police showed up, they were more quiet after the mom left. As the policeman stepped out of the car, I came to the sudden realization that I could be arrested for possesion of drug paraphenalia, as I had my pipe in my pocket, in the same container as my over-the-counter sleeping pills (luckily I had gotten rid of the Dexidrine) I quickly looked for the K-9 markings but, thankfully, it was just an ordinary patrol car.

The people who were arguing with my dad and uncle immediately swarmed the policeman, and I stayed to hear what they had to say, and if they lied or said anything I KNEW not to be true, correct them with my version of events.

Everything they said was true, to the best of my knowledge (it didn't help that while I was listening, I was trying to make up a theory about how everything happens simultaneously along every timeline all at once) (Greg claimed he had been asked to keep an eye on the property while the owner was gone), and the policeman made (what I considered, according to Western morals) a very fair judgment and told my dad to remove the yard waste from the other person's yard, no one from my dad's side was there, but it was a pretty fair judgment(in my opinion, although who gets to judge?), although I don't know how anyone could call peices of the Earth thier own (signs... signs... everywhere is signs... blocking up the scenery... breaking my mind.... (whew! that sleep deprivation really gets to you, dosen't it?)...So I jumped the fence... and said Hey, man! what gives you the right... to keep the animals in... and the people out...). Greg told my dad and my uncle that they couldn't cross Greg's property anymore, which is a huge blow, since the lady on the other side said the same, and now there's no way to get their large gardening tools to his car, except through the house. When I commented 'That's not fair, what about me?' he said that I was welcome to enter his property whenever I wanted (at least he didn't hold the whole family responsible for the actions of one).

So, now we have a pile of branches in our front yard, Bob's not allowed to put his wheelbarrow away, unless I do it, or it goes through the house, and now here are my problems:

dad's trying to think up ways to legally annoy the neighbors (dosen't he realize that anything he could do would just cause him more trouble? Even if he dosen't have my beliefs in karma, he should still see THAT!)

The woman who told me to stay off her property when I was working has a dog that's never on a leash and goes on our property, but it's not hurting anybody Bob told me he was gonna complain about the dog being on dad's property (as if the dog is at fault, as long as it's not hurting anyone, I'm of a mind to let it wander around)

after the cop left, Bob told me that if Greg had touched him, even just poked him a little, he'd have picked up the nearby shovel and hit Greg multiple times (Oh, for goodness sake! that kinda stuff can get you thrown in jail, and plus, it hurts the other person! I told him that I would have stopped him, even if he hurt me.)

all the adults there are going to continue to act like bratty, spoiled children if nothing changes (this kinda thing's happened before, I just wasn't there)

I think I might have been the only reasonable mind there, except for Kelly, her father, and the mom. (No one else seemed to do anything rational, like listen to the other people, or shrug off an insult, they took every word said by another as an affront to thier honor, and even name-calling stung them sorely)

Bob is thinking up ways of getting back at the woman who told me to get off her property (all night, most of the conversation came back to 'I can't belive she called me white trash!')

that's not the first time someone here called the cops on my dad, according to Bob. (hmm.... let's think about that)

My name, Jeffrey, is derived from a word for peacemaker(I think(not sure which language, though)), and it's very accurate. I don't think I COULD stand idly by whilst two people were fighting senselessly, I would try to stop it, even if I were knifed in the process, and had to take my meals through a straw for the rest of my life. I have accepted this burden of peacemaking as mine own unconciously, and only knew it today.

All of this is happening, and I view all of these as problems, and now, for anyone who actually read this far, here's the question; should I move to my dad's house over the summer, and try to make peace betwixt the people of the townhouse row by acting as an impartial mediator, not with them actually knowing that I'm trying to, but just trying to make them see reason? I had planned on moving there anyway, but after today... I'm just not sure.

[pot]Think left and think right[pot]
[pot]and think low and think high[pot]
[pot]Oh, the thinks you can think up if only you try[pot]
-Dr. Seuss

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Registered: 03/15/01
Posts: 443
Loc: MA
Last seen: 15 years, 7 months
Re: I just don't understand some people... [Re: NextGenHippie]
    #600979 - 04/07/02 01:35 AM (16 years, 6 months ago)

(whew, I made it!)

Yeah people are jackasses sometimes. Its like they never grew up and still have all their childish instincts. Just out of curiosity what part of the country do you live in? I think its pointless to try to keep peace in a situation like that. You're just fixing the symptom, not the underlying problem. You could try to change the way the people involved are viewing the situation but then again they're probably too old and set in their ways to accept it. Oh well.

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Registered: 01/08/02
Posts: 47
Last seen: 16 years, 5 months
Re: I just don't understand some people... [Re: skaMariaPastora]
    #600985 - 04/07/02 01:55 AM (16 years, 6 months ago)

I'd say just let things be.

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Registered: 03/30/01
Posts: 311
Loc: MD, USA
Last seen: 8 years, 7 months
Re: I just don't understand some people... [Re: skaMariaPastora]
    #601146 - 04/07/02 08:00 AM (16 years, 6 months ago)

Yeah people are jackasses sometimes. Its like they never grew up and still have all their childish instincts.


Just out of curiosity what part of the country do you live in?

Maryland, right near Baltimore.

[pot]Think left and think right[pot]
[pot]and think low and think high[pot]
[pot]Oh, the thinks you can think up if only you try[pot]
-Dr. Seuss

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Invisiblemr crisper

Registered: 07/25/00
Posts: 928
Re: I just don't understand some people... [Re: NextGenHippie]
    #601178 - 04/07/02 09:59 AM (16 years, 6 months ago)

thanx nextgenh.
that was great reading, really enjoyed it.
sounds like an interesting bunch of people.
the street my brother lives on has 3 houses full of dudes into hotting up cars.
almost every afternoon one of them would anounce his arrival home by smoking up the tyres down the length of the street. his mates would come out and pass judgement on the amount of smoke and the length of rubber laid down, then one of them would try to outdo him. half the neighbourhood thoroughly enjoyed this whilst the other half called the cops. cops would cruise around and give them a talking to, classic daily theater.

near baltimore?
are you into john waters movies?
or is he kind of a leper around those parts?
is edith massey still alive and running the junk shop?

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Registered: 04/07/02
Posts: 158
Last seen: 16 years, 5 months
Re: I just don't understand some people... [Re: NextGenHippie]
    #601565 - 04/07/02 09:16 PM (16 years, 6 months ago)

here's my advice, don't mean to be rude but who really gives a shit, fixing one relationship won't fix em all, as long as half the world couldn't give two shits about where were headed as a society. Just stay where you are and offer advice if asked for it, don't waste you good energies on an insurmountable purpose. All your good heartedness will come back to you, sooner than you think.

insanity with a plan, a plan to stop exercising truth as compared to breathing thin air, but to experience truth as all there is to experience, for what do i not already have that exsists? All i can do is enjoy the ride.

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Registered: 03/04/02
Posts: 69
Last seen: 15 years, 6 months
Re: I just don't understand some people... [Re: NextGenHippie]
    #601667 - 04/08/02 12:20 AM (16 years, 6 months ago)

You wrote------"Everything they said was true, to the best of my knowledge (it didn't help that while I was listening, I was trying to make up a theory about how everything happens simultaneously along every timeline all at once)"

Fantastic.... I thought that was the best part -- it just points out that you're thinking about life instead of running around like a chicken with its head cut off...

You have a very level head about whats going on and it pisses me off that poeple keep telling you that your too young to understand..... staying at your dads is a choice you have to make on your own.. I only have one story from one day in your life so i can't tell you what to do, but I'm pretty damn sure you'll make the best choice for yourself.

I guess I could say don't give up on people, but then again your dad seems like a very mean(sad) person....

Either way I just wanted to say that I think you're a very intellegent, respectful being that people could really learn from....

"...and to the left where up is down now stand a zebra made of shapes of me and silver and the sun so bring no guilt with you up above the flatline let's just hit the sky exploding into one." [ HUM ]

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Back from being gone.
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Registered: 03/18/02
Posts: 6,953
Loc: omotive
Last seen: 3 years, 2 months
Re: I just don't understand some people... [Re: NextGenHippie]
    #601927 - 04/08/02 07:06 AM (16 years, 6 months ago)

I would say no, because it seems they have it in nature to act like that. So trying to fix something that doesn't even realise its broken will never be fixed. You're dad should see for himself in what way he's behaving, and see it is wrong. So he can see it in a differend perspective and try to do something about it himself.

What do you think of this?

:dancing: My latest music! :yesnod:

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Registered: 12/13/01
Posts: 508
Last seen: 15 years, 6 months
Re: I just don't understand some people... [Re: NextGenHippie]
    #602154 - 04/08/02 01:47 PM (16 years, 6 months ago)

If you would like to live with your dad then move in. There may be real problems but you sound like you could handle most of them. Just don't put yourself in a position where you feel trapped emotionally.

As far as the neighbors, go with your heart but understand that some things can't be fixed. You want to live in peace but not everyone does. Some people love conflict and they will do anything to get it. You being the peacemaker may end up with you being the target by the time its over.
And dude, no insults intended, but lighten up on the speed. It sounds like your mind is whizzing at a fast pace. Give it a rest and see if things become clearer or less emotionally charged. Just advice bro.......nothing personal........Jeremy

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General Interest >> Philosophy, Sociology & Psychology

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