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OfflinesysD
this side up.

Registered: 08/03/06
Posts: 384
Last seen: 11 years, 2 months
Searching for Euphoria
    #5929886 - 08/03/06 09:58 PM (17 years, 5 months ago)

Hey guys...yeah, my first post here.
Okay, well first I'll set up the background information....

I've tripped 4 times, all of them being introspective trips. The first was a glowing experience involving Pink Floyd and the lessons of life... The second I was drunk and (stupidly) decided to take shrooms, so I passed out before they kicked in (yeah, that was stupid, I know).
The third time was very intense. I had about 3 grams and went for a bike ride. After about 20 minutes I had some more and was tripping by the time I was on my way home. Spiderwebs fell from trees, trees split in two, the clouds dissolved, etc.... It was very visual and fun riding around on my bike, singing Not to Touch the Earth at the top of my lungs, even though I did get a lot of funny looks.
But when I got home, I had to hide it from my parents and aunt who was visiting. It was fine at first, I just chilled in the basement (but my sister (very anti-drug) was there, so I had to hide in a room). I had some nice auditory and visual hallucinations about the Mayans and Rastafarians... The open eye visuals were amazing, I was on a Rastafarian beach on my bed. I heard songs. When those two intense hallucinations were over, it had felt like hours had passed. I looked at my watch and it had only been 20 minutes! I was panicing now, I kept thinking, I can't survive another 6 hours of this! There's no way I won't get caught! I was afraid everyone would see my pupils. I hid in different rooms and as people passed by, I got deathly scared.

At this point during the trip I was in tears and was still tripping. Kalidoscopes were everywhere. I finally went and talked to my sister. I told her I was on mushrooms and we had a real heart-to-heart. In the intensity of the moment, I swore off all drugs. I told her everything I had done in the past year (shrooms and pot) and got everything off my concience. I felt great after that trip.


But then a good friend of mine wanted to try shrooms... I said, sure, and decided to trip with him out of the blue. At this point I had sworn off pot until I could get that habit under control, I was blowing all my money on pot and smoking way too much. I was fine with no pot then, but I decided to do mushrooms. We idiodically decided to eat them on the bus on the way to a friend's house, one sober person was with us. So we ate them. Got on the bus. Things started to go bad.
About 30mins into the busride, I was starting to feel body dislocation. My other tripping buddy was a lightweight and had us rush him off the bus in the boiling heat to throw up. He did so... My buddy's house was still a good thirty minutes away, and it was boiling out. None of us could drive. I was trying to take care of my buddy who was throwing up at this point. We had no bus tickets left. I started to panic. We were in the middle of nowhere, with no bus tickets and dehydrating from the heat. Keep in mind that I live in a city area, but it was still boiling. Like, I said, I had no idea where we were.
I started to panic badly, and sent my sober buddy to go get water and bus tickets for us all. He left. I was really panicing now, wondering why I did drugs. I kept repeating, "I'm a fucking idiot, why do I do drugs?" My friend was too overwhelmed to answer. We were under the shade of a tree on the grass. I decided to call my sister and tell her everything. She was really pissed off. At this point the sober guy returned and got on a bus with my trippin buddy to go to my buddy's house. I told em to go on without me. My sister gave me the whole guilt trip when she picked me up. I was in tears half the time. My trip was pretty much over, the stress had finished it off for me.


Sorry for so much background guys, but those last two trips are directly tied with my question....

After that last trip, I felt like shit. My sister was fine with me, she wasn't mad or anything, she went with me and made me watch her throw away the rest of my shrooms and pot. I was fine with it at the moment. I really felt like shit the next couple days. I thought it was just the after-effects of the shrooms. The feeling isn't so pronounced now, but I'm not as happy as I was before those two trips. Keep in mind that the last two were about 4 days apart.
Before those trips, I was the kinda guy who would've died happy at anytime. Now I just want to be happy again. I dunno what it is, but I can't get back the same happiness that I felt before.
I remember reading a quote somewhere...
"There is no greater curse than to remember joy without the ability to feel it...."

Don't get me wrong, im not depressed. I still have a good time with my friends and all (I've started occasional pot now, its not a money-eater for me anymore, recently made a batch of brownies, good stuff), its just that nowadays, I'm much less upbeat about anything, I can't get enthuseastic about much, even though I try, and I feel just... bland inside.

I don't really know what I'm asking, heh, but I guess I just really needed to get this down on (e-)paper. Any advice is well appreciated guys.

Peace.





~ (As a final note, I'm considering a mid-level acid trip (never tried) to help get to the root of these problems).


--------------------
repeat after me: "i am a strong black woman"

"awwwww, shucky-ducky!"


Edited by sysD (08/03/06 10:23 PM)


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InvisibleAfroshroomerican
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Registered: 05/12/06
Posts: 891
Loc: Pennsylvania
Re: Searching for Euphoria [Re: sysD]
    #5929966 - 08/03/06 10:31 PM (17 years, 5 months ago)

Ok

I'm going to be absolutely honest with you because you seem to have come here looking for an answer.

You seem like a person who is abusing psychedelics as a way to see cool shit. Just from what I got from reading about how often you did it and where/when you did it.

You treat it like it's weed...which I don't even think should be used that often.

Lay off them. If you want a bit of a high then do low ass doses.

You are taking 3 gram + as a recreation and you are not getting the recreational effects you wished to attain....hence your bad trip.

Taking a mid-level LSD trip will not aid you in feeling any more euphoric. It just sounds like you are SO used to weed that without it you aren't as happy. That happends with any drug you abuse.

Sure Shrooms are fun. But respect them or they won't respect you.


--------------------
"We must learn to live together as brothers or perish together as fools."

~Martin Luther King Jr.~

<passitbobbie> if I just showed you a closeup of my ass
<passitbobbie> youd think it was female

"You owe errrbody up in here an apology fow youwe shit, HO!" - classic


Edited by Afroshroomerican (08/03/06 10:32 PM)


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OfflinesysD
this side up.

Registered: 08/03/06
Posts: 384
Last seen: 11 years, 2 months
Re: Searching for Euphoria [Re: Afroshroomerican]
    #5929973 - 08/03/06 10:34 PM (17 years, 5 months ago)

My first trip I had the utmost respect for it man... I guess just after that I didn't put as much planning into it as before. And spacing it four days apart was just retarded, I admit.
When I go for the trip, I don't go looking for visuals or a high. To be honest my third trip was the only time I've gotten any strong visuals. Sure, I got a bit on my first, but that was almost purely introspective. Visuals weren't as pronounced.
When I go into my trips, I'm always thinking, what'll I learn this time? I always come out of an experience something more than I was when I came in.

The acid trip I'm planning has been in the making for a long time. It'll be very respected...lol

But I dunno, to be honest, I don't abuse weed anymore, I maybe have a brownie once a week, if that.

And I'm glad you're being blunt, that's the only way to get anywhere. Too many people pussyfoot around what they wanna say.


--------------------
repeat after me: "i am a strong black woman"

"awwwww, shucky-ducky!"


Edited by sysD (08/03/06 10:41 PM)


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InvisibleAfroshroomerican
Oprah's Minion
Male

Registered: 05/12/06
Posts: 891
Loc: Pennsylvania
Re: Searching for Euphoria [Re: sysD]
    #5929985 - 08/03/06 10:42 PM (17 years, 5 months ago)

Ah ok.

I think I can relate to that. After my first time I was like "fuck i gotta do that again".

But I think as many people will agree increasing frequency takes a lot of the magic out of it.

I don't think the acid trip will do much. I think it will be a good idea to lay off everything for awhile just to get clear headed.

Since you aren't feeling too great...it wouldnt be the best time to take it IMO


--------------------
"We must learn to live together as brothers or perish together as fools."

~Martin Luther King Jr.~

<passitbobbie> if I just showed you a closeup of my ass
<passitbobbie> youd think it was female

"You owe errrbody up in here an apology fow youwe shit, HO!" - classic


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OfflinesysD
this side up.

Registered: 08/03/06
Posts: 384
Last seen: 11 years, 2 months
Re: Searching for Euphoria [Re: Afroshroomerican]
    #5929988 - 08/03/06 10:44 PM (17 years, 5 months ago)

True.
Thanks for the advice man... I think I'm going to detox for a bit, but AFTER the long weekend, lmao...just gonna finish off these brownies, then I think i'll stay sober a couple weeks....


--------------------
repeat after me: "i am a strong black woman"

"awwwww, shucky-ducky!"


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Offlineyageman
already dead
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Registered: 01/26/06
Posts: 4,965
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Re: Searching for Euphoria [Re: sysD]
    #5930005 - 08/03/06 10:52 PM (17 years, 5 months ago)

If you understood the drug you wouldnt let your sister throw them out in a panic while you are Swearing off drugs and shit even though you never meant it. SHit man..........

Just dont rely on other people like that, make them cry, etc. She is your sister, so dont drag her into the situation. You cant handle your drug, time, or place. You made some dumb mistakes. For one you made a person who knows nothing about drugs feel bad for you and you feel bad in return. As for your own happiness, this is a perfect example why you dont just fuck with these drugs for fun. You done fucked it up for yourself in the future. You feel bad about it. You should.

"I dont feel as happy as before"----> maybe these drugs have kicked you in the ass for the right reason. As Afroshroomerican said, You did some stupid shit, and you can feel that....

Dont feel so bad about it, we have all been idiots at some point.

You have a tendancy to panic because you put your self in situations where there is much room for that. Thats your mistake...

Just dont be less "happy" because of it. There Is so much I would say if I had the time.

You can trip from now on, but the approach that you have explained to us just sucks for you and your sister.


--------------------
[quote]Me_Roy said:
You moron. Material is material is material.  No 'thing' fixes any situation.  If anything were so simple we would be living in a much better world.[/quote] <-----the dumbest thing I have ever read in my life.
Thanks shroomery.


Edited by yageman (08/03/06 10:54 PM)


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Invisibletruekimbo2
Cya later, friends.
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Registered: 12/08/02
Posts: 9,234
Loc: ny Flag
Re: Searching for Euphoria [Re: yageman]
    #5930199 - 08/04/06 12:38 AM (17 years, 5 months ago)

after i first started tripping everything else seemed bland by comparison... could it be something like that?


--------------------
You can check the last post in my journal for contact info.


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OfflineGinseng1
Elegant Universe
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Re: Searching for Euphoria [Re: Afroshroomerican]
    #5930339 - 08/04/06 01:33 AM (17 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Afroshroomerican said:
Ok

I'm going to be absolutely honest with you because you seem to have come here looking for an answer.

You seem like a person who is abusing psychedelics as a way to see cool shit.  Just from what I got from reading about how often you did it and where/when you did it.

You treat it like it's weed...which I don't even think should be used that often.

Lay off them.  If you want a bit of a high then do low ass doses. 

You are taking 3 gram + as a recreation and you are not getting the recreational effects you wished to attain....hence your bad trip.

Taking a mid-level LSD trip will not aid you in feeling any more euphoric.  It just sounds like you are SO used to weed that without it you aren't as happy.  That happends with any drug you abuse.

Sure Shrooms are fun.  But respect them or they won't respect you.




indeed.

you have to develop a relationship with the mushroom.  They dont interact with us so we can like fly around and see funky shit.  They help put our bodies and minds in a place where we can look at life and the universe under a microscope.  Theyre here so you can see things underneath the protective layer that is your ego. To keep us as sane, loving creatures.  Not egotistical bastards with no genuine values or goals.  If you do mushrooms and search for the wrong thing, such as, a *fun* time, then you could very well get your ass kicked.  I know I did.  And you know what, im glad they did, because I then learned that the drugs i should do are not to pass time, or to escape reality.  I use them to experience the fruits of life to the fullest, for a short time, just to remind me the awesome power and beautiful gift that god has given us, which is life as a human(and by god i mean the artist formerly known as god, for you newbies).

But, with experience comes knowledge and soon you will know, aslong as you remember NOT to abuse the mushroom, and continue to explore it with love and not fear or boldness, then you will benefit greatly from this fungus.

IMO, they are a tool, not a recreational drug.  I have no desire to do mushrooms if i can remember what its all about.  :tongue:


--------------------
Flowing through beginningless time since time without beginning...


Edited by Ginseng1 (08/04/06 01:43 AM)


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OfflinesysD
this side up.

Registered: 08/03/06
Posts: 384
Last seen: 11 years, 2 months
Re: Searching for Euphoria [Re: yageman]
    #5931616 - 08/04/06 02:22 PM (17 years, 5 months ago)

Well, first of all, thanks for the posts.

Quote:

yageman said:
If you understood the drug you wouldnt let your sister throw them out in a panic while you are Swearing off drugs and shit even though you never meant it. SHit man..........

Just dont rely on other people like that, make them cry, etc. She is your sister, so dont drag her into the situation. You cant handle your drug, time, or place. You made some dumb mistakes. For one you made a person who knows nothing about drugs feel bad for you and you feel bad in return. As for your own happiness, this is a perfect example why you dont just fuck with these drugs for fun. You done fucked it up for yourself in the future. You feel bad about it. You should.

"I dont feel as happy as before"----> maybe these drugs have kicked you in the ass for the right reason. As Afroshroomerican said, You did some stupid shit, and you can feel that....

Dont feel so bad about it, we have all been idiots at some point.

You have a tendancy to panic because you put your self in situations where there is much room for that. Thats your mistake...

Just dont be less "happy" because of it. There Is so much I would say if I had the time.

You can trip from now on, but the approach that you have explained to us just sucks for you and your sister.






The only reason I brought my sister into this was because I was so fucked up. I barely knew what was going on.
I made some stupid mistakes, I didn't put as much into it as my first trip, so I obviously didn't get as much out of it.
Yeah, my sister is the kind of person who's anti-drug for life, indoctrinated to the max. Drugs are bad to her because she's been brought up that way for 23 years. She has no experience with them and is the kind of person who'll talk over you if you try to explain your views on the subject. She knew I was smoking pot, but not to that degree.

I'm going to lay off the shrooms for a bit, if I do anything at all there's going to be a bunch of thought going into it... I think the two things I need most are a good sitter and a good setting.

And for the first part of your post, at that point, I did mean that I wanted to take a break from drugs. There was only a little bit left to throw out. As you may be able to tell by my description of her, my sister is one of those people who's happier in ignorance.

I think at this point, what I really need is a good night's sleep (been too damn busy with work), a break from the mind-alterants for a couple weeks, and just some plain forethought to my future trips.

~peace.


--------------------
repeat after me: "i am a strong black woman"

"awwwww, shucky-ducky!"


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InvisibleBravo
IntimateAlchemist
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Registered: 07/01/06
Posts: 51
Re: Searching for Euphoria [Re: Ginseng1]
    #5931934 - 08/04/06 03:48 PM (17 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

(and by god i mean the artist formerly known as god, for you newbies)




Truly Brilliant!!!


--------------------
"You do not see things as they are, you see things as you are." -Dyer


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OfflineCelaeno
Stranger
Registered: 07/20/06
Posts: 61
Last seen: 17 years, 2 months
Re: Searching for Euphoria [Re: Bravo]
    #5933771 - 08/05/06 04:58 AM (17 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:


Quote:

(and by god i mean the artist formerly known as god, for you newbies)




Truly Brilliant!!!




Indeed :smile:


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InvisibleLand_Crab
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Re: Searching for Euphoria [Re: sysD]
    #5933805 - 08/05/06 06:00 AM (17 years, 5 months ago)

Damn, I wish someone would have told you sooner that tripping around sober people--particularly family members--is a very bad idea. No judgment, but it sounds like you were naive and inexperienced.

SETTING is everything. (Well, mindset is also very important.) You want to be in a place you are comfortable with and you don't have to leave until you're ready. And if you're with people, they should be tripping (or at least supercool).

So you had two bad trips, the last of which was somewhat traumatic. That's too bad. It sounds like you need more education and experience with regards to "drugs". I put drugs in quotes because the term is utterly moronic when you consider the range of psychoactive substances that are drugs. It sounds like your sister needs better education too.

Also, PLANNING. Stop talking to your sister and start thinking about mushrooms. Do you ever want to eat them again?
I firmly believe that, with the right planning, you can have a really enjoyable psychedelic experience.


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Offlinebobjones
...
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Re: Searching for Euphoria [Re: sysD]
    #5933974 - 08/05/06 09:06 AM (17 years, 5 months ago)

i'd leave your sister out of your drug use from now on.


--------------------
"Outside of a dog a book is a man's friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read"
-Groucho Marx


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Offlinehabitat0789
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Re: Searching for Euphoria [Re: bobjones]
    #5934071 - 08/05/06 10:02 AM (17 years, 5 months ago)

if your really searching for euphoria do this: buy 60x salvia extract, buy a slayer album, get the largest bong you can find, buy a torch lighter, put on the slayer album, burn a whole gram in one bong rip, hold for as long as possible...for best results do in a sketchey area


--------------------

ilove my woods...


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OfflineShroomScape
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Re: Searching for Euphoria [Re: habitat0789]
    #5934322 - 08/05/06 11:45 AM (17 years, 5 months ago)

Hahaha! Hopefully he realizes the sarcasm!!! I mean JESUS!


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OfflinesysD
this side up.

Registered: 08/03/06
Posts: 384
Last seen: 11 years, 2 months
Re: Searching for Euphoria [Re: ShroomScape]
    #5934383 - 08/05/06 12:14 PM (17 years, 5 months ago)

Hahahaha...asshole :p
Well, yeah, I do want to trip again. But like I said, its going to have to wait awhile.
I may not be as experienced as others about drugs, but I've learned more about them than most. I just made some stupid mistakes, got impatient, ect....

And yea, my sister's going to be left out of this from now on, she's already too indoctrinated to change her views on anything like that.


--------------------
repeat after me: "i am a strong black woman"

"awwwww, shucky-ducky!"


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OfflineMauiGanjaMonster
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Last seen: 16 years, 2 months
Re: Searching for Euphoria [Re: sysD]
    #5936023 - 08/06/06 01:31 AM (17 years, 5 months ago)

The only thing I say to people that are so "anti drug" and wont ever change how the view drug's..... is How can you bash somthing you dont even know about? I mean honestly think about it she's trying to make you feel bad yet she knows nothing about them, but you probably wont beable to change her mind if shes been like that for 23 year's... but you never know one day she might suprise you and ask if you would smoke a spliff with her :wink:


--------------------
Trodding through creation in a irie meditation.

As they walk through my garden and steal my fruit, damn devils in a three piece suit.

yeah they walk through my garden and eat my fruit damn puppets, the boys in blue.


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OfflinesysD
this side up.

Registered: 08/03/06
Posts: 384
Last seen: 11 years, 2 months
Re: Searching for Euphoria [Re: MauiGanjaMonster]
    #5937930 - 08/06/06 06:35 PM (17 years, 5 months ago)

Hahahah, yeah right, I remember the first time she found out that I smoked pot...here's how it went:

Me: *walks in, sits down, turns on a video game
Her: So what were you doing tonight?
Me: In my head -"Yeah, I was just smoking pot."
Me: ...
Her: What?!
Me: In my head -"Did I just say that out loud?"


Oh man, that was a fun night, she spent half of it reading to me about the terrible negative effects of pot from her bullshit pshycology textbook. I couldn't stop laughing and eventually just went to sleep.


--------------------
repeat after me: "i am a strong black woman"

"awwwww, shucky-ducky!"


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